Trans activists expressed outrage over a recent article quoting Susan Stanton as calling trans people ‘men in dresses.’ Stanton says the article misrepresented her views. (Blade photo by Henry Linser)
The following essay was written by Susan Stanton’s 14-year-old son, Travis, and supplied to the Blade:
Throughout my whole life, I thought my Dad was a really tough guy. He went out with the cops and busted bad guys. He shot guns, fought fires and was an aggressive driver. He liked football and lots of sports.
Then one day my thoughts changed about him when we had a family meeting and he told me how he felt about himself. He said he felt like a woman on the inside and was going to change into one. He said he tried his best to be a manly guy but he couldn’t stop his feelings to become a girl.
I was very surprised to hear this. At first I thought I was in a dream, it was very hard to believe such a thing. I thought he was a manly man — more manly than most guys. After a few days I thought about it and I knew he was making the right choice to become a girl.
Although I can’t relate to his feelings, it must be really hard to hide something like that. It would be like having $1 million and not being able to spend it. After a while, your feelings would take over and you’d spend it.
Now, though, I am very proud of my Dad, after I saw him and saw that inside he was the same Dad as he always was. He still likes football. He still likes to be an aggressive driver. He is still the same person but just different on the outside. I am very happy for him now that he is who he wants to be. I think that everyone should be who they are and not try to be the same as other people.
If you ask me, this has got to be the manliest thing he has done in his whole life. It takes a real man to come out of your shell and say, “Hey, I am who I am” and take the responsibilities of doing that.
In conclusion, I thought my Dad was a man, gender-wise, but now he is who he is meant to be. He is himself.
Less
than
one
year
after
being
fired
from
her
job
as
city
manager
of
Largo,
Fla.,
because
of
her
status
as
a
transgender
woman,
Susan
Stanton
has
come
under
fire
from
transgender
activists,
who
have
called
her
a
sell-out
to
their
cause.
In
a
series
of
developments
that
would
have
been
unthinkable
just
months
ago,
Stanton’s
perceived
status
as
a
positive
role
model
for
the
transgender
community
has
soured,
with
transgender
activists
expressing
outrage
over
a
recent
newspaper
article
quoting
her
as
calling
trans
people
“men
in
dresses.”
Stanton
says
the
article
misrepresented
her
views.
But
Stanton
remains
firm
in
her
support
for
gay
Rep.
Barney
Frank
(D-Mass.)
and
the
Human
Rights
Campaign,
over
their
controversial
decision
to
back
an
employment
non-discrimination
bill
(ENDA)
for
gays
that
excludes
protections
for
trans
people.
Frank
and
Speaker
of
the
House
Nancy
Pelosi
(D-Calif.)
have
said
there
weren’t
enough
votes
to
pass
a
trans-inclusive
bill
and
that
moving
ahead
with
a
gay-only
version
would
make
it
easier
to
pass
a
trans-inclusive
bill
sometime
later.
“I
think
we
need
to
do
a
whole
lot
more
educating
before
we’re
going
to
be
able
to
realistically
have
the
support
on
the
national
level
to
get
this
passed,”
Stanton
said
of
a
trans-inclusive
measure.
“I
personally
don’t
feel
denying
the
rights
of
one
group
should
be
perpetuated
unless
everybody
has
those
rights,”
she
told
the
Blade.
Stanton
became
the
subject
of
international
news
coverage
last
February
when
then
Steve
Stanton,
48,
a
husband
and
father
of
a
teenage
boy,
announced
he
was
transitioning
into
a
woman.
At
the
time,
Stanton
presided
over
1,000
employees
as
city
manager
of
Largo,
a
conservative,
Republican-leaning
town
of
76,000
on
Florida’s
Gulf
Coast.
Stanton
had
held
the
position
for
14
years.
The
announcement
came
after
Stanton
learned
that
the
St.
Petersburg
Times
was
about
to
publish
a
story
exposing
him
as
a
transgender
person.
His
announcement
prompted
the
Largo
City
Council
to
fire
him
last
March
from
his
$140,000
a
year
job
for
“cause,”
saying
his
secret
plans
to
change
his
gender
represented
a
breach
in
trust
and
would
prevent
Stanton
from
being
able
to
carry
out
his
duties.
Stanton
began
appearing
in
public
in
women’s
clothes
shortly
after
the
firing.
The
newly
emerged
Susan
Stanton
became
an
instant
face
for
the
transgender
community,
appearing
on
television
talk
shows
and
network
news
broadcasts
as
an
advocate
for
transgender
rights.
She
insisted
her
change
in
gender
would
not
hinder
her
ability
to
continue
to
work
as
a
city
manager
and
argued
that
she
and
other
transgender
people
should
not
be
targeted
for
discrimination.
Stanton
upset
transgender
activists
and
nearly
all
of
the
nation’s
transgender
rights
groups
by
siding
with
Pelosi
and
Frank,
saying
she
believed
passing
a
gay-only
version
of
ENDA
as
a
“first
step”
would
help
open
the
way
for
passing
a
trans-inclusive
bill.
The
House
passed
the
gay-only
measure
in
November
by
a
vote
of
235
to
184.
Stanton’s
association
with
HRC
fueled
criticism
against
her
by
many
trans
activists,
who
accused
HRC
of
betraying
the
trans
community
by
failing
to
oppose
a
non-trans-inclusive
ENDA.
HRC
spokesperson
Brad
Luna
said
Stanton
spoke
before
HRC
functions,
including
a
board
meeting,
but
that
she
has
“no
formal
role”
with
the
group.
In
an
interview
with
the
Blade
this
week,
Stanton
said
she
understands
the
frustration
and
anger
many
trans
activists
have
toward
HRC.
She
said
she,
too,
believes
HRC
made
a
mistake
by
committing
itself
to
oppose
a
gay-only
version
of
the
bill
and
to
later
back
down
from
that
commitment.
“The
politics
changed,”
she
said.
“I
know
people
want
to
take
their
ball
and
bat
off
the
ball
field.
I
think
that’s
a
mistake.
I
do
understand
the
anger
with
the
Human
Rights
Campaign.
But
I
also
understand
that,
as
someone
who
used
to
have
to
be
responsible
for
making
those
types
of
decisions,
sometimes
you’ve
got
to
be
pragmatic
and
sometimes
the
importance
of
being
at
the
table
is
in
conflict
with
the
need
to
have
a
sense
of
community.”
Stanton
said
her
years
as
a
city
manager,
where
she
had
to
juggle
competing
political
interests,
made
her
acutely
aware
of
the
need
for
achieving
objectives
on
an
incremental
basis
rather
than
taking
an
“all-or-nothing”
approach.
She
said
that
while
she
was
stung
over
her
position
on
ENDA,
she
was
startled
and
hurt
over
the
attacks
that
came
after
the
St.
Petersburg
Times
published
a
Dec.
31
feature
story
entitled,
“Susan
Stanton’s
lonely
transformation.”
The
article,
which
was
based
on
a
lengthy
interview
with
Stanton,
quoted
her
as
saying
she
was
“totally
unprepared”
for
the
rejection
and
hostile
reaction
she
had
encountered
from
her
straight
friends
and
associates
in
Largo
following
her
coming
out
as
a
transgender
person.
“People
I’d
known
for
20
years
won’t
even
talk
to
me,”
the
article
quoted
her
as
saying.
It
noted
that
she
lamented
the
fact
that,
although
her
wife
and
son
have
remained
loyal
and
supportive,
her
only
remaining
friend
was
the
woman
who
gives
her
weekly
electrolysis
treatments
to
remove
body
hair
as
part
of
her
transitioning
process.
“Susan
has
said
all
along
that
she’s
not
like
other
transgender
people,”
feature
writer
Lane
DeGregory
wrote
in
the
St.
Petersburg
...
The
following comments were posted by our readers and were
not edited by the Washington Blade. We ask that you
treat others with respect; any post deemed offensive will
be removed.
GaryS on 3/8/081:20 AM:
i completely support jennifer ushers use of harry benjamin syndrome to descrive herself. since it was only two years previos to her sex change surgery that jenifer was posting transvestite porn on the web ("jennifer's story") and had an extensive public picture collection of himself in dresses on his yahoo page, i think that some sort term is needed to distinguish this sort of prson from an actual transexual. harry benjamin syndrome is as good as any.
pennyjane on 1/21/0811:59 AM:
no, old trannie, not all of us mangage to be invisible nor even aspire to same. we "visible" ones bear the brunt. we are the out, non-stealth transsexuals who are working for dignity. you can't do that from the closet. it's a choice we have made, some more consciously then others, and we are willing to take all the honest criticizm. bugs us, though, to take the criticizm for those who climb back in the closet each day and leave us holding the bill for their fun. good luck and God bless. pj
Old trannie 99 on 1/21/081:40 AM:
Susan needs to learn that she is only one of nearly a million transpeople. From CD's to wives and husbands we manage to be invisible. When one person takes it upon herself to be a spokes person for the invisible she better know her stuff, or the woodwork will surround her.
The hiring of two media consultants, Making snuggles with Barnie the trans fear person she stepped into the twilight zone. Not of reality but rather of her own mind.
Go back and start over Susan, your help not needed.
pennyjane on 1/18/083:41 PM:
i don't know if hbs is the proper term or not, but we do need to find a way to differentiate those of us with incongruent gender and sex markers from those with sexual needs for feminine expression. for us who have signed on to hbs it simply means that our physical and mental genders out diametricly out of allignment. we don't want to become women, dress up like women or express our "feminine side". we want to express ourselves as the women we already are, all the time and all the way.
pennyjane on 1/18/081:33 PM:
i would quote from some of the "debate" on the house floor during the enda fiasco....."it is always the right time to do the right thing."
i can't speak for ms stanton's motivations but if she thinks she can speak for any transgendered person she needs to quit smoozing up to that political hack, joe solomese. hrc has become the enemy! backstabbing, lying monsters. if she alligns herself any further with them i hope she ends up in the same very hot place they will be. throw hrc out!
Rebecca Cohen on 1/14/0810:36 AM:
I cannot agree with Jennifer Usher and her advocacy of the term 'Harry Benjamin Syndrome' to be used for trannsexual people. Harry Benjamin considered transsexual people to be pathetic, mentally ill individuals who should be castrated to shut them up. He considered transsexualism to be a form of mental illness. He held white supremacy ideas and considered black people to be mentally inferior to whites. I don't want to be labeled 'Harry Benjamin syndrome'.
jeri . on 1/12/082:10 PM:
monica, an inclusive ENDA is not a cure-all for transgender unemployment, it is only a beginning. we will never realize any form of equality, including employment, as long as people refer to our members as "trannies" under any circumstance. sue stanton isn't working against the community so much as expressing her opinion. no matter how much i may disagree with her opinion, no one has the right to refer to her as a tranny for any reason. even you. your derogatory remarks reflect badly on us all.
Vanessa Edwards Foster on 1/12/081:09 PM:
Not all transgender activists engaged in an automatic bash-fest of Susan Stanton. My blog editorial (http://transpolitical.blogspot.com/2008/01/desperately-seeking-susan.html) pointed out that Ms. Stanton clearly holds very parochial views on transgender issues, sentiment and the community as a whole. Only 9 months being out? We didn't push her to be leader. Rather, it was Barney Frank and HRC embracing simply for their own political cover. Stanton is their device to silence and fracture us.
AnnieSocial on 1/12/081:05 PM:
Even before she was fired, Susan Stanton was asked to attend local support groups and become a part of the local community, and she consistently refused, saying, "I'm just not a group person".
She has no knowledge of the trans community outside of those who can afford to attend Lobby Days and other events around the country. She has no clue what it's like to have been unemployed or underemployed for years, for surgery to be nothing but a far-off dream.
She needs to experience the real world.
havasumoma on 1/12/0812:18 PM:
I think one very important aspect of this siutation has been entirely overlooked here. There is one other HUGE reason folks are upset with Susan Stanton. Folks who are trans and folks who are not trans are upset because Susan has been offered help and wise counsel. Help to understand the needs and politics of this community. She refused and continues to refuse. Susan doesn't want and doesn't need our help because she sees herself as not needing it or us. She has set herself up as an island.
MonicaH on 1/12/0811:13 AM:
Jeri, The term "Aunt Trannie" is meant to be a derogatory term, the same as "Uncle Tom" is a derogatory term when an African American says it to another. If a TG person openly works against the welfare of the rest of the community, then they need a strong message from the rest of us. What do you suggest? "Oh, please, you must stop hurting us. We are so disappointed. Boo-hoo, boo-hoo." We are talking about people's lives here. I've buried 3 friends and long unemployment was the cause.
reginanjus on 1/12/0810:13 AM:
She is a transsexual! Her own words! Like us in more ways than not! Susan has been asked and urged to do interviews with the trans press by many people, including me!I personally have asked her within the last few days to have interviews with Angela G. (TG-Forum) and Beckygrrl (Trans-radio). Susan's response was to say she published here, have a good life and she ended our friendship! Susan, when you dispose of people that are truly friends then you will be left alone and isolated! Good Luck!
Dalmax on 1/12/089:07 AM:
Anyone who had been in the fight to remain included felt the sting of that 11th hour dismissal by the ad hoc committee that made the decision. More than that is the fact that Susan Stanton got caught up in it, failed to recognize her own fragile position and was swept away by the rush of political waters.
While I am righteously pissed off at SS for her role in this, it is more because her ego got the best of her and she convinced herself that she could even be the role model.
jeri . on 1/12/082:22 AM:
first, i find the term "aunt tranny" used in reference to susan stanton highly offensive. the term by itself represents a trans-phobic ignorance. sue stanton deserves, and has received, praise for her very public transition. her statements concerning ENDA and HRC reflect her personal opinion. unfortunately, the media attention she has received as a victim of discrimination has also provided her with a platform to make gross errors. her opinion reflects her experience as an ousted city administrator from largo city, florida - not as a spokesperson for the transgender community. HRC is reaching out for anyone in the transgender community who will publicly support them – they have rightfully lost all credibility. HRC was publicly espousing that they would not support exclusive legislation at the same time they were prompting congress to support it. do any of you who are criticizing stanton really believe HRC has made her aware of the depths of their duplicity? she is an intelligent woman – she will learn. she will come to understand the desperate need for validation that an inclusive ENDA would only BEGIN to realize for our community. she will come to understand the depths of despair experienced by so many, but especially by our disadvantaged youth. she will come to understand why HRC’s duplicity has enraged so many in our community. she will come to understand that her opinions on these subjects would better serve her and the transgender community if stated privately. in the meantime, i hope never to hear the term “aunt tranny” again - it demeans us all. oh, and maybe HRC can get larry craig to serve as a spokesperson for gay men.
StillLiT on 1/11/085:08 PM:
I agree that this is not a transition issue but instead an issue where someone with very little knowledge of a situation has walked in thinking she knows better than those of us who have been fighting this fight for the past decade. Often against HRC. Not because we want to but because they continue to align themselves against the transgender community.
AnneBarlow on 1/11/084:18 PM:
Susan, it may help if you actually write the St Petersburg times and tell them what you said at the end of this article. “Simply stated, this article is not an accurate representation of my beliefs concerning the transgender community or my experiences as a transgender person.”
Kelly Moyer on 1/11/083:59 PM:
Imagine a woman who discovers that she has breast cancer. Shortly after diagnosis, an insurance company with an a reputation for botched breast cancer care starts using her to promote a treatment that most women with more experience have found to be ineffective and traumatizing. This woman only sees her own experience, and looks down on the multitude of women who disagree with her. She keeps publicly pushing her beliefs while those who disagree are portrayed as the enemy.
Sound familiar?
Kelly Moyer on 1/11/083:45 PM:
The issue here is that the media and the HRC are portraying Susan Stanton as something she is not: a representative of the transgender (transsexual, whatever) community. She has limited experience with her own transition, apparent internalized shame about trans people in general, and very little background working with the community. We have plenty of competent and experienced representatives, but the media prefer a spectacle, and Susan can't seem to comprehend her own inexperience and shame.
MonicaH on 1/11/083:40 PM:
xrk9855,
This is NOT a transition issue. This is an issue of a person who has very little knowledge acting as if she is the Transgender Messiah. Our early mistakes only hurt ourselves. Her "mistakes" are hurting thousands of others and giving ammunition to the trans bigots to justify hurting even more.
A 14-year-old taking steroids is hurting themselves. Barry Bonds taking steriods has the potential of harming thousands if they follow his lead. This is exactly the same thing.
Beckygrrl on 1/11/083:17 PM:
Also worthy of note is the fact that while Susan Stanton agreed to be interviewed by the Blade, she has refused to speak to transgender community media.
She'll talk to the biggest LGBT paper in the country, but she won't agree to be interviewed in media that is specifically transgender-relevant and created.
Personally, I think her refusal to address the trans community directly, in and of itself, speaks volumes.
xrk9855 on 1/11/082:56 PM:
This is just sad. She's a relative newbie to transition. We all made
mistakes, and grew from those mistakes, as we transitioned. But
somehow Susan isn't allowed to make mistakes. Shame on all of you. I
think this speaks more to YOUR own internalized transphobia, not
hers. Just look how vociferously you're all trying to distance yourself
from her. We all have our own unique paths and need to respect to
respect the paths of others. Give her room to breath, she'll do fine,
you'll see.
AnneBarlow on 1/11/082:33 PM:
I don't know many that saw her as a role model or a leader. She was someone with a tragic story to tell. I don't envy anyone who starts their transition with such a spectacle. I am put off by her arrogance and astounded at the original article statement "Eventually, she decided it was too early for transgender people to be federally protected."
Too early for rights? Sub "Too early for women to be protected" and see how well it goes over.
Jennifer Usher on 1/11/081:32 PM:
Personally, I think Susan Stanton showed great courage in what she said. She simply declined, as more and more of us are, to follow the "transgender" party line. Personally, I am tired of being saddled with label of transgender. I am not. No one changes their gender. Gender is immutable. You are either born with a male brain, or a female brain. If it does not match your body, then you are a transsexual, or as I prefer, you have Harry Benjamin Syndrome.
Autumn Sandeen on 1/11/081:08 PM:
Dlampo, I know I'm much more upset at Susan Stanton's use of the derogatory phrase "men in dresses" to describe transwomen who don't "pass" in their target sex. It's same offensive language used by religious right orgs arguing against employment equality for transgender people. Imagine a gay leader saying "fags haven't done the education work for anti-discrimination protection" -- it's the language that's more offensive than the sentiment. When combined with the sentiment, the slur stings.
Boo on 1/11/081:07 PM:
dlampo- no one said she isn't sufficiently TG and no one is promoting a victim identity. And yes, no one is screaming and yelling. We're just tired of being told to get in the back of the bus while HRC handpicks lapdogs to be the "community" role models. Give it a rest. Stanton has the right to whatever views she wants, but nobody elected her to be the face of all things transgnder. Or is the idea of a community actually picking its own leaders just too radical?
dlampo on 1/11/0812:29 PM:
Susan Stanton has more courage than all the professional whiners below combined. Apparently, she's not sufficiently TG for them and doesn't share their victim identity to the proper degree. In fact, she has a much better grasp of the public's perception of the TG community than the self-appointed spokespeople below, as well as how much work remains to be done to increase public acceptance. The lazy ones just want to scream and yell.
Claire64 on 1/11/0811:56 AM:
I'm in agreement with Ms. Stanton. I would have preferred a
transgender inclusive bill but what's done is done. Reps. Frank &
Pelosi have promoted the interests of all queer people for decades. I
participated in a vigil outside Speaker Pelosi's San Francisco office,
wrote letters to my Senators and fought the good fight, but lost. It's
time to move on with a new strategy and stop belittling this woman for
her views.
Claire,
San Francisco
Christibyte on 1/11/0811:51 AM:
Susan Stanton is not one of "our own" she is someone very new to Transgender issues and the only reason she is famous is because she got fired from a public service job. She doesn't know a lot of about transgender issues or the Transgender community. She does not speak for the community nor can one person speak for a whole community. I find this piece nearly as offense as the St Petersburg Times article. If you are going to report on the issue, tell the whole story.
jllie on 1/11/0811:37 AM:
I hope that the producer in charge of the CNN News crew that has been following her for months now will use some common sense when broadcasting her misstatements and insults. I'd like Stanton to just stop. Stop talking. We don't need your help. And as for Joe Solmonese and the HRC - Why not just remove the T from LGBT in your agenda and be done with it? Everyone says we need them. I say we don't. I'd rather they were honest about their non-support of trans people than be hypocritical.
Sue on 1/11/0811:30 AM:
Once again we get to see the many faces of Susan Stanton TransGender sellout...
National polls tend to indicate little or no education is necessary. Frank and Co are just Transphobic If they were to support TG/TS rights they would have nobody to walk over or anybody to hold up as oppressed people.
The business of Civil Rights is just that a business a racket to keep the money flowing to groups like HRC and to keep little toadies like Frank in power.
Sue on 1/11/0811:29 AM:
Once again we get to see the many faces of Susan Stanton TransGender sellout...
National polls tend to indicate little or no education is necessary. Frank and Co are just Transphobic If they were to support TG/TS rights they would have nobody to walk over or anybody to hold up as oppressed people.
The business of Civil Rights is just that a business a racket to keep the money flowing to groups like HRC and to keep little toadies like Frank in power.
jdg1965 on 1/11/089:55 AM:
Ms. Stanton has become the chosen poster child for transgender community by Barney Frank and HRC, not the community she says she thinks she is the face of.
Instead of expressing her thoughts about her own journey, she has chosen to make comments on everyone elses, despite being out less than a year.
Her transgender experience is her transgender experience, not everyone elses. Maybe she should try working a job well below her education or be forced to live on the street as many transgender.
Boo on 1/11/087:42 AM:
Score another one for the gay community's ignorance of transpeople. With all due respect to Ms. Stanton, I don't know anyone in the trans community who saw her as a positive role model. Sure, we're sympathetic that she lost her job, but she has no obvious qualifications to be any kind of role model or spokesperson for trans people. For HRC to simply anoint her as one was adding insult to injury. How would the gay community like it if transpeople took it upon themselves to crown your leaders?
