Comments on: A gay alumnus reflects on Penn State tragedy

By: Anabelle Richards

Anabelle Richards — Thu, 26 Jan 2012 11:05:35 +0000

Your and the APA’s contention that homosexuals are not more likely to sexually abuse children is not born out by the facts. Boys are something like 4 times more likely to be victims of sexual abuse. Men are something like 4 times more likely to sexually abuse children. So you’re trying to tell us women are raping these boys? Because if a male has sex with another male, that’s a homosexual act. And homosexuals are defined by homosexual acts.

By: howdeeduty

howdeeduty — Thu, 17 Nov 2011 21:16:37 +0000

On a separate but related note, calling the sexual preference/taste/fetish for children “a disease” is not something I like to echo. Don’t get me wrong–I consider it wrong for adults to inflict sexual attentions of any kind on any sentient being without their consent, and to grant that consent, they must be able to. Thus animals cannot consent, people with developmental disabilities cannot consent, those directly refusing consent cannot consent, and children younger than the age of consent can not consent. It is the job of an adult–particularly an adult employed in providing care, guidance, or coaching to those who cannot consent–to understand these boundaries, live by them, and demand that of others as well.

The reason I make this distinction is to stay out of the trap of calling a “disease” (an effectively individual pathology) what is in fact a long term disconnect from society’s standards, as Sandusky seems to have manifested (and indeed the entire PSU football program and administration). Even his lawyer tried to pitch the media for that, saying that he “was just an overgrown kid” “horsing around.” Well, sorry, dood, but the time is past when a man can breach another’s confidence and trust and beg off the harm they caused by saying, “I’m just a little boy in a man’s body.” A man charged with caring for youngsters must leave behind childish things and be a man. Period. Some say he was “from an earlier, more innocent age,” and that really angers me. It is not innocent to cover up one’s actions, to conduct a secret life, to wheedle and stalk and lie and hide. Any man should know that the moment his psyche tells him to lie or distort or evade, then he is doing something wrong. That inner voice calling us to be honest and courageous is what used to be called a mature conscience. And it seems to be largely lost, for many people. Many more enable unconscious or unconscionable actions and patterns of behavior (consider the issue of infidelity to the commitments one makes to one’s partner).

That Sandusky, Paterno, McQueary, the AD, and higher ups in the PSU administration were so out of touch with society’s views on these matters strikes me as sickening in the extreme. They created a little bubble of sportsoholism there in Happy Valley (yuck! the name!), and no greater social realities have been welcome to intrude. It was all about securing Joe Pa’s legacy.

This I think is Mr. Naff’s point. I too was braced for a widespread backlash against gays (etc.). And it didn’t happen! One evening last week I sat down with my partner and noted this, and was surprised to burst into tears for a moment. It was this huge sensation of mixed relief, and joy, and a bitter sadness that it took something of this horrendous sort to be the litmus for our social, psychological, emotional, and moral evolution as a nation and as a people. I have also felt great empowerment reading comments from people across every imaginable walk of life–every race, religion/belief system, class status, geographic location, sexual preference, and any other set of identity characteristics–joining together to revile these crimes, and the men who committed, enabled, and hid them…while not playing the gay bashing card.

U.S., I love you still, for even when you disappoint me, you are the laboratory for human enlightenment and courageous evolution of what it means to be human.

By: howdeeduty

howdeeduty — Thu, 17 Nov 2011 20:59:57 +0000

Jerry Sandusky raised six kids with his wife. They are all adopted. Some gay bashers have used this as evidence that they had a problem with their marriage (i.e., he’s “a secret gay” as one of those einsteins put it). Obviously no other explanation can be considered for their not reproducing. FYI

By: JakeH

JakeH — Wed, 16 Nov 2011 02:25:47 +0000

Why should they? This guy is heterosexually identified, heterosexually married, and though he has a propensity (and easier access to) boys, there is no evidence to suggest he has attractions to adult males. And even if he does have that attraction, how does this have anything to do with open gay couples fighting for equality? He isn’t in a gay union (and is not directly affected by the anti-gay laws you’re seemingly trying to tie to him).

By: Bonnie Kaye

Bonnie Kaye — Sun, 13 Nov 2011 23:58:06 +0000

Very sadly, the male gay community takes the brunt of the blame after incidents like this occur. Pedophiles are far more prevalent in the straight community, but people seem to forget this. Pedophilia is not gay or straight–it’s just sick no matter who performs it. It doesn’t have to be labeled straight or gay–just sick. It’s a disease there is no cure for, and it’s long overdue for people to accept that.

By: The Rev. Chet Thompson

The Rev. Chet Thompson — Sat, 12 Nov 2011 16:13:18 +0000

Thank you Kevin, for the thoughtful and thought provoking expression of balanced feeling and emotions. I have a difficult time feeling any compassion toward Abusers, and that includes both Sandusky, and McQueary. his accomplice by being the do nothing person, who could have stopped the rape he witnessed, he would have stopped other rapes that followed! McQueary is Guilty by his complicity, and should be dealt with accordingly. I regret that this has hurt Penn State (your Alma Mater), BUT moreso, I regret that we even have to have these discussions about men, who through Greed and Need for Controlling people, plague those who are not able to defend themselves. Rape is wrong! No question, but complicite Rape is equally wrong, and Mike McQueary needs to be held accountable, and prosecuted for his action and inaction. He was the key to stop this, and the people who are trying to equate this with Homosexuality definitely have NO CLUE in the realities of life!
Thank you for your contribution to attempt to set things on the rightful place!

By: Tomas Vitrius

Tomas Vitrius — Sat, 12 Nov 2011 01:25:36 +0000

Your points, while largely correct, do not establish this coach as not being gay. Until the gay community has the strength to stand, say “Yes, this is one of ours” and accept the same guilt that the heterosexual population has, then it will always only pay lip service to the notion of equality.

By: Patsy Carpenter

Patsy Carpenter — Fri, 11 Nov 2011 18:06:15 +0000

I have been reading about this scandal for days and I found your article one of the most thoughtful I’ve read. Thank you.

By: Chris Vogel

Chris Vogel — Fri, 11 Nov 2011 17:35:05 +0000

Hmm: more child-molesting by men claiming to be heterosexual (or celibate Roman Catholic priests). Perhaps this explains their virulent hostility to gay marriage. Maybe they are “ex-gays”; another crowd of unscrupulous, and homophic pretenders. Heterosexuals are such a strange bunch: when the topic of same-sex marriage comes up, they immediately start talking about animals and close relatives. Weird.