Fast Five Fix: August 22

Here are the five stories you should be talking about at the water cooler this morning:

• Roise O’Donnell survived a massive heart attack last week, a close call after she ignored the symptoms of a 99% blockage of her left descending artery. Get well soon, Rosie!
• Campus Pride has released its list of the top 25 most LGBT friendly colleges in America — University of Maryland College Park is in the top, as is my Masters alma mater, the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign! Now America knows where to send all its little gaybies for schoolin’.
• Calvin Klein’s ex boy toy is penning a tell-all. Shoulda had him sign a non-disclosure, Cal! Or do what I do, and avoid all things interesting so that your tricks don’t have anything to write about.
• The City Council in little Jackson Michigan, birthplace of the Republican party and home to Ted Nugent, is about to vote to take up a non-discrimination ordinance.
• The Advocate’s former marketing director and events planner was found dead earlier this week after an accidental fall, sadly. He was 42.