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Baltimore Pride is not in jeopardy

Organizers working with city to resolve debt

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Baltimore Pride (Washington Blade photo by Michael Key)

Baltimore Pride (Washington Blade photo by Michael Key)

By JABARI LYLES & THOMAS IDOUX

We were shocked on Monday and a bit saddened to read this highly sensationalized headline in the Washington Blade: “Baltimore Pride in jeopardy due to lack of funds.” What was intended as a community crowd-funding effort to help our organization with debts incurred from last year’s administration was irresponsibly misconstrued as immediate danger to an event that has been running for over 40 years, Maryland’s largest LGBTQ event, Baltimore Pride.

A large, capable, new team of GLCCB volunteers, board members and staff have worked countless hours over the past several months to plan and produce Baltimore Pride 2016. We have built successful new partnerships and processes to ensure the success of Baltimore Pride this year and for many years to come. We are dedicated to remaining fully transparent with our community, and providing as much relevant information as possible to help with your understanding of where we are, and to repair any lost faith in Baltimore Pride this untimely article may have caused. Baltimore Pride is not in jeopardy, and will certainly not be cancelled.

The article references a Razoo fundraising page that was created after a board decision to reach out to the community for help with the only remaining debt from last year’s Pride, police salary fees. For all 25 police officers used over the course of both days, to whom we are required to pay overtime salary for working the event, we were invoiced one month after Pride for $12,146.27. By that time, Pride funds were already depleted due to poor planning and management of funds at the time. We are happy to say those responsible are no longer involved with our organization. This bill has remained unpaid since.

Baltimore City assured us that we would not be able to move forward with permit applications for Baltimore Pride 2016 until this debt is cleared up. Instead of using funds from this current year’s Pride coffers, we asked our community for help to clear up this piece of old debt. Although our language on the fundraising site reads, “Pride 2016 will not happen unless these debts are cleared up,” we never intended to insinuate that without the success of this particular fundraiser, Baltimore Pride will simply not happen. We announced this fundraiser at our recent town hall and it has been well received, as we have been able to raise over $6,200 of our $15,000 goal. This amount will help us to pay 2015 police fees, plus $3,850 required for permits. GLCCB is fully prepared and has made arrangements to pay these fees, although we appreciate and welcome any and all community support.

However, struggles with paying policing fees are not new for GLCCB. GLCCB has outstanding bills for Pride police dating back to 2011, and is currently in arrears $61,454.28, including the $12,146.27 from last year. In an attempt to clear up this debt, GLCCB pursued a payment arrangement with Baltimore City last year. This arrangement is currently being negotiated. We have made it clear to city officials that we as the current leaders are devoted to paying our bills responsibly. We also recognize that some of these past charges were exorbitant, and the city should better consider the importance of Baltimore Pride not only in its social and historical fabric, but also for the amount of revenue it generates for Baltimore during that week. Several cities across the country are supported directly and financially by their local city government to produce an annual LGBTQ pride celebration. Baltimore is one of few cities without this support, yet has maintained a successful festival for over 40 years. GLCCB is interested in building a closer relationship with city government so that we may work together for the benefit of sexual and gender minorities, and determine ways to ensure these debts are no longer incurred. The city has been agreeable and cooperative thus far.

According to our budget, released publicly at our town hall event in March and recently on our Facebook page, projected expenses for Baltimore Pride 2016 will cost $90,850, not $200,000 as reported by Steve Charing in the Washington Blade. We have already secured over $65,000 so far toward Baltimore Pride, and are working hard every day to attract new sponsors, vendors and parade entries. We anticipate another $35,000 coming in within the next few weeks from vendors who have expressed interest but have not yet paid. Baltimore Pride is not only Maryland’s largest LGBTQ event, it is also currently the largest source of income for the GLCCB. Our new team is hungry for the opportunity to create new programs, develop new leaders, and diligently serve the LGBTQ community of Baltimore. Our success with this event directly impacts our work in the community.

It has been understandably difficult for our organization, as it currently stands, to detach ourselves from the stained history and failures of previous administrations. Although we are sure even today’s team is not yet perfect, with new leadership and authentic love for community, we have been able to make incredible strides toward restoring GLCCB into what it has always needed to be: a strong, reliable place of resource and empowerment for sexual and gender minorities in Baltimore and across Maryland.

As GLCCB President Jabari Lyles said in a recent town hall meeting, “It took a while to [mess] up the GLCCB; it will take a while to fix it.” We understand this process will not be easy, and we will inevitably meet people who believe the GLCCB may never be restored. Regardless, we must work toward moving forward, staying above the drama, keeping honest, remaining transparent, and restoring faith in our organization for the benefit of the people we continue to serve, even during tough times. It was disappointing that we had to suffer this irresponsibly constructed article during a time when we are still building and need as much public support as we can get. We can only ask that those who see the benefit in working toward a successful GLCCB, and recognize the incredible work of those involved in repairing this organization continue to support us. We will write as many statements and hold as many town halls as we need to in order to prove that we are not the GLCCB of the past, and that we are moving forward stronger and better than before. We hope that you notice we are speaking up much more than before. We appreciate the community holding us accountable, and are looking forward to a successful, beautiful Baltimore Pride in 2016.

To join in on Baltimore Pride planning conversations, the public is welcome to attend our monthly Pride leadership meetings, occurring on the second Wednesday of each month, 6:30 p.m. at GLCCB. GLCCB also holds public board meetings on the second Tuesday of each month, 6:30 p.m. at GLCCB. To donate to our Baltimore Pride fundraiser, and to help us with clearing up this old debt, visit our fundraising page at http://goo.gl/co2UWH. For more information about Baltimore Pride, or to learn how to become a sponsor, vendor or parade entry, visit our website at www.baltimorepride.org.

Jabari Lyles is president of GLCCB; Thomas Idoux is vice president and Baltimore Pride co-chair.

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Commentary

Sexting with younger guy has me asking: How queer am I?

Reflections on LGBTQ life in 2024

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Jake Stewart is a recovering Hill staffer based in D.C. In addition to writing, he barbacks at the Little Gay Pub."

Once upon a time, not all that long ago, a man sexted another man. 

There were words. There were pictures. There were filthy questions and even filthier responses. You know, the way a good sexting convo ought to be, for those who dabble. 

One man was 33. The other, 24. And while it comes as no shock that I was the 33-year-old, it may be more surprising to learn it was the 24-year-old who grabbed the reins. 

What kinks you into? he asked. 

Shit – I didn’t know. I barely even bottomed before the pandemic, and now I had to know my kinks? 

I’m open, I replied, evasively. You? 

His response left me coughing: “Love musk sweat ws public group rough bb verbal bate edge roleplay and very open-minded.” 

Now I’m no prude (in fact, many would call me a downright whore) but this young man articulating his kinks and fetishes in such detail blew my mind. When did he learn what he liked? At 24, all I wanted was to top a guy and leave with as little communication or attachment as possible. At 33, I wasn’t sure what a few of the items he listed even meant.  

Perhaps I shouldn’t be surprised when young men — and the younger generation across the LGBTQ spectrum in general — have already figured out their sexual interests. I arrived in D.C. from Idaho in 2008 as a fresh-faced 18-year-old; I came out three years later in 2011. Attitudes toward queerness have shifted substantially since then, and these days it is undeniably easier for younger people to explore their sexual and gender identities (which, by the way, is fantastic). 

But this conversation left me wondering: What do I like? I haven’t sought out that many new sexual experiences, and while fetishes, kinks, and sexual desires can seem trivial, they’re inextricably intertwined with gender and relationships. If I can’t articulate what I like in the sack (or in public, if I dare), then how do I know what I’m seeking from a long-term partner, or if that’s even what I want? 

As soon as I came out, I thought my job was done. All I needed after that was to snatch up a cutie and settle down. Instead, my identity centered on building my career in politics, where sexual openness isn’t as appreciated. I, like many D.C. queers around me, moved here bright-eyed, bushy-tailed, and ready to change the world for good. 

Then came a tough lesson: Just because I wanted to improve the world didn’t mean people wanted me to. I was inexplicably fired from not one job but two, and suddenly the do-gooder in me grew jaded. The career I dedicated years to was suddenly ripped from my hands, and I became so disillusioned I didn’t even want it back. Oh, and the cherry on top: My boyfriend dumped me two days later. 

Once everything unraveled, I wondered: Was the me of the past the me I truly wanted? Or was I reflecting back what I thought everyone wanted me to be? 

Well, a few major meltdowns and an extended slut phase later, my life couldn’t be more different. I now work at a new gay bar in town to support myself, and I’ve given myself space to pursue the arts. This former straight-laced, type-A, tightly wound gay abandoned the safe track and he couldn’t be more terrified. He also couldn’t be more excited. 

But losing my old career also left an existential-sized hole in my identity. So, as I sexted this 24-year-old with newfound awareness of my limitations, I decided this must change. 

How? As I said, I work at a gay bar in one of the queerest cities in America. Now more than ever I’m surrounded by those who are LGBTQ and every shade in between. Why not learn from those around me, whether younger, older, or around the same age, but whose experiences are no less queer? Why not carve out time to have in-depth discussions and discover what the possibilities are? 

If being queer means to go against the established norms of gender and sexuality, then there’s still plenty of territory for me to explore. No longer can ‘bottom’ or ‘top’ be my only options. 

So, the purpose of this column – aptly titled Queer Quest – is to capture my exploration of queer identity. It’s not to teach you as much as it is to teach myself, and you can either learn alongside me or simply be entertained. At the very least, I’ll have a series of portraits on what it’s like to be queer in the mid 2020s. At most, I’ll have a better understanding of who I am as a queer person. 

Then maybe, just maybe, I’ll become a better sexter. 

Jake Stewart is a D.C.-based writer.

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Commentary

What will you do to make Pride safe this year?

Anxiety reigns among American Jews after Oct. 7

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(Washington Blade photo by Michael Key)

Each year, hundreds of thousands of Jews and supporters of Israel attend Pride marches. With a few exceptions, these spaces have always been safe and welcoming for the broader Pride community. 

But this year is different. 

For American Jews, anxiety reigns as we head into this Pride season. The appalling rise of antisemitism since Oct. 7 forces us to ask difficult questions. As many Jews increasingly feel alienated and excluded from progressive spaces, we’re left to wonder: If I wear a Jewish symbol, march with a Jewish group, or wave a rainbow flag adorned with the Star of David, will I be safe at Pride?

Even before Oct. 7, LGBTQ Jews had plenty of reason to feel trepidation about their safety at Pride. From blanket bans on Stars of David at past Pride gatherings to antisemitism on display at the recent Sydney Pride, too often Jews feel forced to choose between their LGBTQ and Jewish identities and hide their connection to Israel.

Since Oct. 7, terms like “apartheid,” “genocide” and “Zionism equals racism” are increasingly thrown around casually, often without a nuanced understanding of their impact or the realities they oversimplify. This rhetoric not only alienates but also endangers Jewish queer people. It makes us feel emotionally unsafe. It increases the chances that we will be physically unsafe as well. 

We must not allow the Israel-Palestine conflict to be imported into Pride.

I will always remember the euphoria of the first Pride rally I attended. I was barely 18 years old, in a crowd of people of all ages, races, genders and gender orientations — and they were like me. Queer. It felt safe. It was the first time I experienced that feeling of safety, and it will always stay with me. 

Like Pride events everywhere, it was a vibrant, colorful space for LGBTQ people to celebrate our true authentic selves, without fear or reservation.

But that feeling of safety wasn’t shared by everyone in my small New England town. I soon noticed a few people scattered throughout the crowd wearing paper bags over their heads, with eye holes so they could see but not be seen. I later learned that those faceless people were teachers who, in those days before civil rights protections, needed to protect their identities and their careers. 

They did not feel safe. Will Jews and those who are connected to Israel feel safe this year?

The history of Pride is a testament to courage in the face of adversity. It wasn’t long ago when attending Pride events was a defiant act against societal norms, where participants like those teachers faced tangible threats of discrimination, ridicule and even violence. Even today in some places, our queer community still navigates a gauntlet of hatred as we try to celebrate who we are.

It’s crucial to recognize that within the Jewish community, there is a wide spectrum of views on the Israeli-Palestinian conflict, including many who are deeply committed to advocating for Palestinian rights. In fact, many of the 1,200 innocent Israelis murdered on Oct. 7 were Zionists who devoted their lives to reconciliation and peace with their Arab neighbors.

We are at a pivotal moment, one that demands action: What can we do to ensure Pride remains a safe space for everyone, including Jewish participants?

It’s imperative that Pride committees around the country proactively address these concerns. They must implement training programs focused on de-escalation and fostering an environment of understanding and respect.

As individuals who stand in solidarity with the values of Pride, each of us must consider our role in this effort. Will you march alongside those of us who feel vulnerable, offering your presence as a shield against intolerance? Will you engage in dialogues that challenge the importation of external conflicts into Pride, advocating instead for a celebration that unites rather than divides?

The true test of inclusivity at Pride lies not merely in welcoming a diverse crowd, but in ensuring that every participant feels safe and valued. If we remain indifferent to the vulnerabilities faced by Jewish queer people this Pride season, we will fall short of the very ideals of inclusivity and solidarity that Pride stands for.

Just as we expect schools to protect trans and nonbinary students like Nex Benedict, we have a responsibility in the LGBTQ community to ensure that people can carry an Israeli flag or a Palestinian flag, wear a yarmulke or a hijab and be safe.

As we look forward to this year’s Pride, let us commit to making it a space where safety is not a privilege afforded to some but a right enjoyed by all. Let’s engage with our local Pride committees, advocate for comprehensive safety measures and stand in solidarity with those who feel at risk. 

Only then can we celebrate the true spirit of Pride, rooted in love, acceptance and the unwavering belief in equality for all.

Ethan Felson is the executive director of A Wider Bridge.

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Opinions

How to protect your sobriety on St. Patrick’s Day

Celebrate with a supportive friend and carry a mocktail

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Sobriety can be challenging, whether you overcame alcohol or drug addiction or chose to abstain from alcohol for a healthier life. Holidays like St. Patrick’s Day can serve as a reminder of the past or could be looked at as another day. 

Many celebrate St. Patrick’s Day sober, as there are generally family-friendly gatherings, community events, or even sober celebrations. If you have concerns about your sobriety, there are practical tips you can use to protect it on St. Patrick’s Day. 

For instance, remind yourself why you are sober, and don’t do it alone. You can still have fun and celebrate but do it with other sober people. Everyone has their reasons for stopping drinking; remind yourself of those reasons and hold yourself accountable.  

Know your triggers; it doesn’t matter if you are a recovering addict or have removed alcohol from your life. Be cautious around possible triggers that pose a challenge. Most people in this situation choose to skip the bar and find something fun to do or go to a sober St. Patrick’s Day celebration. 

Keep a non-alcoholic drink or mocktail in your hand. People will not bother you to ask if you want a drink if you already have something to sip on, like a mocktail. This also leads to planning how to say no. You will encounter social pressure if you go to a bar on St. Patrick’s Day. It’s unavoidable. It’s wise to practice ways to refuse alcohol. 

Finally, if all else fails, take a walk outside if you feel overwhelmed. The most straightforward solutions are usually the best. Remove yourself from any situation you know will lead to relapse. This is also why it’s essential to be with a sober friend or loved one; there is accountability and someone to lean on.

The benefits of being sober are plentiful, along with the numerous health perks, such as better quality sleep, more mental alertness, and lessened anxiety or depression. Yet, there is one benefit that is not necessarily always spoken about. 

Being sober on St. Patrick’s Day or any day removes all chances of impaired driving. Unfortunately, days that promote heavy alcohol use may increase the chances of drunk or drugged driving. For example, in Washington State, impaired driving has been involved in roughly half of fatal crashes for decades. In 2022, 52% of traffic fatalities involved an impaired driver, according to the Traffic Safety Commission. 

Moreover, drivers ages 21 to 30 make up one-third of impaired drivers in fatal crashes, and another 20% are ages 31 to 40. If you are celebrating St. Patrick’s Day sober, take the necessary precautions and look out for one another. If you choose to consume alcohol, drink responsibly, know your limits, and do not drink and drive.

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