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UCLA coach Kirk Walker on life after coming out

‘Your team is a family, and I needed to be true to my family’

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Kirk Walker, gay news, Washington Blade

Kirk Walker came out in 2005 while coaching for Oregon State.

Kirk Walker officially became the ‘gay’ Division I softball coach back in 2005 when he came out to his team at Oregon State. The press coverage followed with headlines that declared he was the first publicly out coach in the NCAA. Despite courageously sharing his story, Walker wasn’t completely comfortable with the new title.

“I didn’t want to be labeled the gay coach,” he admits. “But then I said that’s fine. I realized it needed to be said, that we needed to have some visibility. I decided to stop fighting it.”

Like his life, Walker’s role is one that keeps evolving. It has been shaped by the sports environment he works in, the confidence he continues to gain from the process of coming out and his morals. When he finally embraced who he was, he found it directly conflicted with his personal coaching philosophy. That was his motivating factor for coming out.

“I had been feeling for years like I was sending the wrong message,” says Walker, who has been an assistant coach at UCLA since returning in 2012. “As a coach you tell your athletes to have integrity and to be authentic. How could I ask that of them when I wasn’t setting that example? Your team is a family, and I needed to be true to my family. That was his motivating factor for coming out.”

Walker’s experience resonated with many, and after sharing his story, his inbox was flooded. When Rick Welts, a longtime NBA executive, decided to come out, Walker reached out to show his support. The response he got from Welts still inspires him to this day.

“I got an email from him that said, ‘I carried your story around with me before I decided to tell mine.’” He applauds the significance of sharing. “Your story can affect somebody.”

That small interaction was a big factor in leading Walker to enter the advocacy stage of his life, and he has been loaning his support to several LGBT sports initiatives for years. Nationally he has been involved since 2012 with the Nike LGBT Sports Coalition, speaking at the annual summit held in Portland, Ore.

“I have a great passion for LGBT advocacy,” says Walker, whose demeanor is both measured and charged with purpose. “There’s so much more to be done around education, bullying and diversity in sports. I hope to be able to do this full time when I retire from coaching. I look forward to any opportunity to be involved.”

Walker’s diversity and inclusion vision includes work with his foundation. Equality Coaching Alliance and the LGBT Sports Coalition both provide confidential support and counseling to hundreds of athletes. While the younger generation can benefit from more visible role models, something Walker did not have, he thinks their views on coming out or why they stay closeted are very different from in the past.

“They don’t really see coming out as being all that imperative and don’t even like labeling themselves as gay or straight,” he says. “There are many in this generation that are comfortable existing as they are, without making statements.”

Counseling and connecting high school, college and professional LGBT athletes is a major part of the advocacy work that Walker does. And he has seen throughout the years, that building a network of support creates an environment where athletes can see they are not alone, and can feel strong enough to choose to come out or not.

But Walker acknowledges there are fears around the process, and feels that the same pressures exist today.

“The perception that sports is inherently homophobic still keeps many coaches, athletes, and individuals from coming out,” he says. “You never have to come out when you are straight, it is assumed. Even in an accepting environment your sexuality will always be assumed straight because it is a huge majority of how society identifies itself.”

In his view, one of the most impactful detriments to not coming out is the amount of time and effort put into trying to be someone else.

“Every second that an athlete or a coach spends on pretending is wasted energy,” says Walker. He lived that lie for years, he says and it was exhausting. “Why does it matter whether you come out or not? Because it frees you up and allows you to focus on competing and being an athlete. It lets them uncap their athletic potential. What coach wouldn’t want that? What athlete wouldn’t?”

Promoting diversity, building awareness and helping create opportunities for LGBT athletes around the country fills up Walker’s days as much as devising strategies for his softball players. Along with the spotlight, he welcomes the titles.

“The stories we’ve seen in the last six or seven years have been powerful,” Walker says. “I think it will continue to be the headline of the story for a while. But it doesn’t have the same gravitas as before. We have to move on, to where it becomes the second part of the story. I think we will get there.”

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Caitlyn Jenner backs NY county transgender athletes ban

‘Let’s stop it now while we can’

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Caitlyn Jenner endorses Nassau County's transgender athlete ban during a press conference. (YouTube screenshot)

Caitlyn Jenner flew from Malibu to New York this week to join her fellow Republicans in their nationwide quest to keep transgender girls and women from competing in sports with other women. 

“Let’s stop it now while we can,” said the Olympic gold medalist, at a news conference carried live by Fox News Channel. 

Republican Nassau County Executive Bruce Blakeman organized the event so that Jenner could speak in support of his February executive order banning trans athletes at more than 100 county-owned facilities. 

“Trans women are competing against women, taking valuable opportunities for the long-protected class under Title IX and causing physical harm,” said Jenner without providing supportive evidence of her claim. Jenner said the ban would defeat “the woke agenda.” 

Her comments drew praise from former NCAA swimmer and paid shill Riley Gaines, who represents the Independent Women’s Forum and has also worked with the failed presidential campaign of Republican Gov. Ron DeSantis of Florida on his anti-trans athlete platform.

“If the left wants to fight this battle on this hill, it’s a losing battle,” said Jenner. “We will win the battle.” She claimed she spoke on behalf of women and girls, contradicting her past statements in support of trans girls competing according to their gender identity and despite the fact she herself still competes in women’s sports.

Shortly after the ban was announced last month, New York State Attorney General Letitia James and New York Gov. Kathy Hochul, both Democrats, denounced it and accused Blakeman of “bullying trans kids.” 

James called the order “transphobic and deeply dangerous,” and argued that it violates the state’s anti-discrimination laws. The state attorney general challenged it in court March 1 with a “cease and desist letter,” demanding that Blakeman rescind the order, saying it subjects women’s and girls’ sports teams to “invasive questioning.”

As the Los Angeles Blade reported, Blakeman’s legal team countered with its own lawsuit on March 5, claiming her cease and desist letter violates the 14th Amendment’s equal protection clause.

“Not only was the executive order legal, but we had an obligation to defend it,” Blakeman said Monday. 

The order has also been challenged by the New York Civil Liberties Union, which filed suit last week on behalf of a women’s roller derby league based in Nassau County that welcomes trans women and would be barred from using the county’s facilities by Blakeman’s executive order.

Just days before the Long Island news conference, Jenner joined Olympian Sharron Davies, who also campaigns against trans inclusion in sports, for an conversation with a British newspaper, the Telegraph, which has been outspoken against trans inclusion. 

They recalled that in their day, tests to determine sex were mandatory in order to compete, and Jenner said she has been “pushing” for sex tests to return to sports, decades after sports organizations around the world abandoned the practice because they were unreliable. “If they continue down this road, it will be pretty much the end of women’s sport as we know it.”

“I can still hit a golf ball 280 yards,” Jenner continued, not mentioning she plays from the ladies’ tee. She did however opine about not being “a real woman,” acknowledging that many trans women disagree with her view. 

“They keep saying, ‘Oh, I’m a real woman, I’m a real woman,’ and I’m going, ‘No, you’re not,’” said Jenner. “I will use your preferred pronouns, I will treat you as a female, you can run and dress and do whatever you want, I have nothing against that, it’s fine, but biologically you’re still male.”

She added: “​Let me explain — I am biologically male, OK? I’m XY. There’s nothing I can do to change that. If you believe in gender dysphoria, and I think most people do realize it’s not a disease, it’s a mental condition, just like some people are left-handed and some people are right-handed, it’s kind of the way you’re born and I’ve dealt with it my entire life.“

“I consider myself a trans person, I am still genetically male, I changed all of my ID right down to my birth certificate so technically yes, I am female, but on the other hand I know I’m not.”

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Former UMD basketball player Abby Meyers discusses lesbians in sports, March Madness

Potomac native signed with the London Lions last August

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Abby Meyers (Photo courtesy of Abby Meyers)

Star basketball player Abby Meyers signed with the London Lions last August, but she called Maryland home before calling the shots in London.

Meyers, a lesbian shooting guard, grew up in Potomac and graduated from Walt Whitman High School in 2017. She played for Princeton in her undergraduate years and played for the University of Maryland during graduate school.

She began playing basketball in elementary school, and she was already showing an abundance of potential by the time she was in high school.

In her freshman year of high school, the school’s basketball coach sat down with Meyers and her family and showed them a list of universities with Division I basketball teams. Meyers circled the names of the schools that she was interested in attending. From there, the doors leading to a collegiate basketball career began to open. She began working towards her dream and ended up playing for Princeton.

“It was kind of like a mutual understanding between the two of us, me and basketball,” Meyers told the Washington Blade. “I took more individual lessons, and I just realized that the potential was sky high.”

She came back to her home state to attend the University of Maryland not only for its business program but also for its celebrated basketball team.

“I grew up watching Alyssa Thomas, Shatori Walker-Kimbrough and so many other legends that passed through that program,” Meyers said. “So for me, I knew that basketball-wise, it was the best decision I could make. … They definitely had all of the qualities to make me the best player I could be.”

Before shipping off to London, Meyers briefly played in the WNBA for the Washington Mystics in the summer of 2023. In fact, the aforementioned UMD alum Shatori Walker-Kimbrough was one of her teammates.

She described her time with the WNBA and in London so far as a “learning experience.” 

“I got to relearn what it meant to be a rookie again,” Meyers said. “All of a sudden you enter a new team, a new level and you’re at the bottom, and you just have to let your actions speak louder than your words.”

Meyers publicly came out around 2019, and since then she has been a role model for many other lesbian women in sports.

“By coming out I’m actually being my authentic self, but I was scared that people were going to judge me and look at me differently when in fact, I was met with open arms, love, and appreciation,” Meyers said.

Meyers believes the journey one takes to coming out is an individual process that looks different for everyone.

“At the end of the day, it’s your own race; run it at your own pace,” Meyers said.  “Never be apologetic for who you are. When you have to start compromising yourself and your values for other people like though that’s not the community you want to be a part of.”

She has not experienced much anti-LGBTQ stigma since coming out, but that does not mean that it does not exist in other sports communities. However, in this modern social climate, Meyers pointed out, people are much more accepting of gay women in sports.

Nina Hazra, a University of Maryland medical student, grew up playing basketball with Meyers. The two were on the same team in middle school, but they went to different high schools and would often play against each other. 

Hazra did not play much past high school, but she remained close friends with her former teammate and rival to this day. She went to most of the home games during Meyers’ stint at UMD.

Though Hazra does not identify with the LGBTQ community, she noticed a tension in the sports world that affects all women, regardless of sexuality. However, with today’s shifting climate, it has become easier for female athletes to express their identities

“Women who express strong emotions in sports are often treated differently than men who do the exact same thing,” Hazra said in an interview. “I feel like as we’ve gotten older, there’s been a lot more celebration of womanhood in whatever form in sports, and I think that’s one of the places where you can then kind of go outside those societal norms.”

But Hazra still noticed the impact Meyers had on younger generations in sports who may be struggling with their identities.

“It doesn’t matter your sexuality, your gender identity, all that stuff. That doesn’t matter when you’re playing a sport,” Hazra said. “A lot of us didn’t have role models in those years growing up and just to get to see her being that for so many girls is so amazing.”

Elisa Pinzan, also a former Terrapin, is good friends with Meyers. 

Originally from Italy, Pinzan played for the University of South Florida for four years before entering the transfer portal and landing at UMD. She now plays for Keflavik IF in Iceland.

Pinzan and Meyers formed a strong bond while playing for the Terrapins together. 

“She was the first person I got close to; she is very open, smiley and friendly, and I felt comfortable around her from the first day,” Pinzan described. “I am glad to have met someone like Abby, with such a kind soul.”

Pinzan thought that fans should keep their eyes peeled for the Terrapins this upcoming March Madness season. 

“They are a very young team with energy, enthusiasm and grit on the floor, and I think they are a lot better than the record they have,” Pinzan wrote about the Terrapins in an interview. “Despite being young though, they are learning a lot every game and I am sure they will be able to transfer these lessons for the best time of the year coming up.”

Meyers agreed that there is a lot to look forward to this March Madness. She said that with Coach Brenda Frese’s game plans and strong assistant staff, the Terrapins have a strong chance of advancing throughout the competition.

According to Meyers, March Madness will be different for women’s basketball this year, pointing out that it’s more popular right now than men’s games, as women’s basketball is selling out arenas.

“I only think it’s gonna get better and it’s going to grow even more,” Meyers said. “Just the marketing, the social media, the overall awareness of the women’s game. Fans are growing by the number.”

Meyers believes that female basketball players have to rely more on their skill than their athleticism, which she believes makes women’s games just as — if not more — exciting than men’s games. She said that over the past few years, there has been a strong shift in women’s viewership that has shrunk the gap between men’s and women’s basketball, including from a technical standpoint, given that men and women play with the same level of equipment.

Regardless of where UMD ends up this March Madness, Meyers will be cheering the Terrapins on from across the pond — especially the women.

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Banned trans golfer Hailey Davidson: ‘Hate and bigotry will never win’

NXXT mandates players must be ‘biological female at birth’

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Hailey Davidson on Good Morning Britain. (Good Morning Britain YouTube screenshot)

Transgender pro golfer Hailey Davidson is pushing back against a policy change announced Friday by the Florida-based mini-tour, NXXT. From now on, competitors must be “a biological female at birth” in order to participate. 

“Effective immediately, I have been removed (banned) from the next three NXXT tournaments that I had already signed up for and been approved to play,” said Davidson in a post on Instagram. “They changed their policy mid season, after signing me up already and being 2nd in the Player of the Year race.” 

The three-time winner from Scotland has played nine times on the tour this season.

According to a statement by the tour’s CEO, Stuart McKinnon, the change underscores the organization’s commitment to “maintaining the integrity of women’s professional golf and ensuring fair competition.” NXXT Golf issued that statement on International Women’s Day.

“As we navigate through the evolving landscape of sports, it is crucial to uphold the competitive integrity that is the cornerstone of women’s sports,” said McKinnon in the statement. “Our revised policy is a reflection of our unwavering commitment to celebrating and protecting the achievements and opportunities of female athletes. Protected categories are a fundamental aspect of sports at all levels and it is essential for our Tour to uphold these categories for biological females, ensuring a level playing field.”

Davidson said the policy change in her social media post was discrimination, adding that the decision denigrates cisgender female athletes as well as trans athletes. 

“You know what really bugs me is that people think I win just by showing up,” she wrote. “This is such a slap in the face to ALL female athletes being told that any male can transition and beat them regardless of the life of hard work those women put in.

“You think you’re attacking me, but you’re actually attacking and putting down ALL other female athletes.”

She concluded with a vow: “You can scream at me, threaten me, throw insults at me, and even ban me BUT I will ALWAYS get back up and keep fighting to the very end. Hate and bigotry will never win.”

Davidson also posted a message for the women she had planned to compete against: “I hope those NXXT players who are now in the top five are still able to earn those Epson Tour exemptions they were promised and continue to be reminded of in the previous couple of tournaments.” 

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