Local
Obstacles in the aisle
Local couple overcomes adversity, enters Crate & Barrel wedding contest

Washington residents Jonathan Howard (left) and Gregory Jones are hoping to strike it big in a Crate & Barrel-sponsored wedding contest. (Photos by Heather Lyons; courtesy of Howard and Jones)
It began as little more than a lark, but a Washington gay couple entered a Crate & Barrel wedding contest and have been shocked to find friends and allies have catapulted them to the top of a huge list of nearly 200 couples hoping to nab the top prize of a $100,000 company-sponsored wedding.
Jonathan Howard, who’s 29 and just 11 days younger than his partner, Gregory Jones, discovered the contest in a Crate & Barrel e-mail. They moved to D.C. together in 2008 and got engaged in October when Howard popped the question. They’re planning to take advantage of the District’s new same-sex marriage law, which went into effect this week, but having an extra $100,000 would obviously sweeten the deal.
Howard and Jones were in second place as of press time with 5,906 votes. They’d previously been in the lead. A Chicago police officer who was paralyzed in the line of duty, Densey Cole, is in first place with Mary Cole with 10,677 votes, but they may be disqualified — they’re already married, having wed in the hospital when he awoke from a coma following the May 2009 accident. They’re hoping for an ocean-side ceremony to renew their vows. The rules state couples entering the contest must be engaged.
Howard says it would be amazing if they win.
“It would be great for us but more than that for the community to really say, ‘Hey, we’re a normal couple and we’re getting married and it doesn’t matter if it’s two men,'” Howard says. “This company is supporting us and it’s a great story, it’s a great step for marriage equality but in a completely different venue, not political at all. I would be shocked and amazed and overwhelmed and overjoyed and it would be just great for everybody involved.”
So how did these two average Joes convince nearly 6,000 people to vote for them? A lot of it stems from a tragedy they only hinted at in their 100-word online bio. Howard made a lot of friends and contacts in the gay community following an August 2008 hate crime attack. He and three friends were in Boston, where he went to college and lived at the time, when it happened.
“We were walking home and a group of four guys pulled up to us in a car,” Howard says. “I turned around to see what the commotion was and the last thing I remember is hearing, ‘Die, faggot, die,’ as they stomped my head into the pavement.”
Howard says he’s lucky he wasn’t seriously hurt in the attack. His attacker, Fabio Brandao, eventually pleaded guilty but received a two-year suspended sentence that let him get by without any jail time, an outrage, Howard says.
He met hundreds of gay activists and friends after the attack and was friends with many of them on Facebook. When they heard he and Jones were soliciting votes, they rallied in support. The Gay & Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation wrote about the couple spurring more votes and Jones’ brother’s fiance in Chicago, Katie Lindner, went on a mini-crusade of sorts helping them get the word out. She’s working on a graduate degree in Chicago on new media and says the Facebook phenomenon is fascinating to observe.
“People kind of think of [Facebook] as this thing that doesn’t seem important, that wastes your time and fills your day, but it gives me chills to see how much support there’s been for them,” Lindner says. “It’s bigger than any one individual could achieve.”
“I think people see our story as a nightmare with a fairy tale ending,” Jones says. “We went through this horrible thing together and it made us better, stronger people and brought us closer to each other.”
Though the votes are important, it will ultimately be up to a panel of judges to decide who wins. Several prizewinners will be selected from among the top 50 vote getters by Crate & Barrel employees.
Is it realistic to hope the company might select a gay couple for one of the top prizes, even the $100,000 grand prize? Vickie Lang, manager of public relations and community affairs for Crate & Barrel, says it’s certainly possible and that the gay-friendly company is open to it.
“Ultimately our role is to be a resource to any couple celebrating a wedding, a commitment ceremony or any of that,” Lang says. “As part of that, we’re celebrating inclusiveness and we’re excited about that. … We’re looking for couples who really reflect the Crate & Barrel lifestyle, whether they’re same-sex couples or heterosexual couples.”
And just what is the “lifestyle”? Lang mentions “Timeless, classic, high quality, clean, vibrant and comfortable — things for a warm, approachable lifestyle.”
There’s been an ugly side to the contest, though. Anonymous Chicago blogger Detective Shaved Longcock, who knows and supports the Coles, wrote in comments that have since been removed from his blog: “A gay couple is giving Densey and Mary Cole a run for their money? Let’s really get the vote out for one of our own. … I am not politically correct and never will be. Period! I am not going to let this fruit loop couple beat one of our own!”
That posting inspired a litany of anti-gay anonymous posts against Howard and Jones including, “these are all guys who can’t please a woman,” “faggots deserve to die,” “Homos are as sick as child molesters and rapists,” “I hope they all catch HIV,” and more.
But there’s also been an upside. Jones says he’s heard from people who harassed him with anti-gay slurs in school who’ve now voted for he and Howard to win. One even apologized.
“I can’t even put it into words,” Jones says. “It’s a warm and amazing feeling.”
A handful of other same-sex couples are also in the contest. One couple, Ed and Erwin, who have two adopted sons, are facing Erwin’s terminal lung cancer and hope to wed before he dies. They have more than 1,000 votes.
If they win, Howard and Jones would like to wed on their anniversary — Oct. 10 (10/10/10). If not, they’ll likely bump to April 2011.
Regardless of how it turns out, they’re happy to have found each other and thrilled that they can marry in Washington.
“It is so affirming that this is our nation’s capital and this happening right here around people making our rights, laws and liberties,” Jones says. “It also makes a huge statement that Congress had the ability to veto this and they did not. It sends a really positive message that this needs to be accepted and that we are equal and deserve every right that every other couple in this country deserves.”
To vote, go to www.ultimateweddingcontest.com and register an e-mail address. Howard and Jones are couple number 22682.
District of Columbia
Drive with Pride in D.C.
A new Pride-themed license plate is now available in the District, with proceeds directly benefiting local LGBTQ organizations.

Just in time for Pride month, the D.C. Department of Motor Vehicles has partnered with the Mayor’s Office of LGBTQ Affairs to create a special “Pride Lives Here” license plate.
The plate, which was initially unveiled in February, has a one-time $25 application fee and a $20 annual display fee. Both fees will go directly to the Office of Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender and Questioning Affairs Fund.
The MOLGBTQA Fund provides $1,000,000 annually to 25,000 residents through its grant program, funding a slew of LGBTQ organizations in the DMV area — including Capital Pride Alliance, Whitman-Walker, the D.C. Center for the LGBTQ Community, and the Washington Blade Foundation.
The license plate features an inclusive rainbow flag wrapping around the license numbers, with silver stars in the background — a tribute to both D.C.’s robust queer community and the resilience the LGBTQ community has shown.
The “Pride Lives Here” plate is one of only 13 specialty plates offered in the District, and the only one whose fees go directly to the LGBTQ community.
To apply for a Pride plate, visit the DC DMV’s website at https://dmv.dc.gov/

The nation’s capital welcomed WorldPride this past weekend, a massive celebration that usually takes place in a different city every two years.
The Saturday parade attracted hundreds of thousands of people from around the world and the country. The state of Delaware, a few hours drive from D.C., saw participants in the parade, with CAMP Rehoboth, an LGBTQ community center in Rehoboth Beach, hosting a bus day trip.
Hope Vella sits on the board of directors and marched with CAMP Rehoboth. Vella said that although the parade took a long time to start and the temperature was hot, she was “on a cloud” from being there.
“It didn’t matter to me how long it took to start. With the current changes that are in place regarding diversity and inclusion, I wanted my face there,” Vella said. “My life is an intersection. I am a Black woman. I am a lesbian, and I have a disability. All of these things are trying to be erased … I didn’t care how long it took. I didn’t care how far it was going to be. I was going to finish that parade. I didn’t care how hot it was.”
The nearly two mile parade route didn’t feel as long because everyone was so happy interacting with the crowd, Vella said. The group gave out beads, buttons, and pins to parade watchers.
“The World Pride celebration gave me hope because so many people came out. And the joy and the love that was between us … That gave me hope,” Vella said.
Vella said that people with disabilities are often overlooked. More than one in four Americans have disabilities, according to the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.
Vella said it was important for her “to be out there and to be seen in my wholeness as a Black woman, as a lesbian, as a woman with a disability and to not be hiding. I want our society to understand that we exist in LGBTQ+ spaces also.”
Retired Maj. Gen. Tammy Smith is involved with CAMP Rehoboth and marched with a coalition of LGBTQ military members. Smith said they were walking to give transgender military members visibility and to remind people why they are serving.
“When we are not visible, what is allowed to take our place is stereotypes,” Smith said. “And so without visibility, people think all veterans are conservative and perhaps not open to full equality. Without visibility, they might think a small state with a farming background may be a place that’s unwelcoming, but when you actually meet the people who are from those places, it sets aside those stereotypes and the real authenticity is allowed to come forward.”
During the parade, Smith said she saw trans military members in the parade make eye contact or fist bump with transgender people in the crowd.
“They were seen. Both sides were seen during that parade and I just felt privileged to be able to witness that,” Smith said.
Smith said Delaware is a state that is about freedom and equality and is the first state for a reason. The LGBTQ community is engrained as part of life in the Rehoboth and Lewes areas.
“What pride means to me is that we must always be doing what is necessary to maintain our dignity as a community,” Smith said. “We can’t let what people with negative messaging might be tossing our way impact us and the celebration of Pride. I don’t see it as being self-promoting. I see it as an act of dignity and strength.”
District of Columbia
Drag queens protest Trump at the Kennedy Center
President attended ‘Les Misérables’ opening night on Wednesday

On Wednesday night, four local drag performers attended the first night of the Kennedy Center’s season in full drag — while President Donald Trump, an outspoken critic of drag, sat mere feet away.
Three queens — Tara Hoot, Vagenesis, and Mari Con Carne — joined drag king Ricky Rosé to represent Qommittee, a volunteer network uniting drag artists to support and defend each other amid growing conservative attacks. They all sat down with the Washington Blade to discuss the event.
The drag performers were there to see the opening performance of “Les Misérables” since Trump’s takeover of the historically non-partisan Kennedy Center. The story shows the power of love, compassion, and redemption in the face of social injustice, poverty, and oppression, set in late 19th century France.
Dressed in full drag, the group walked into the theater together, fully aware they could be punished for doing so.
“It was a little scary walking in because we don’t know what we’re going to walk into, but it was really helpful to be able to walk in with friends,” said drag queen Vagenesis. “The strongest response we received was from the staff who worked there. They were so excited and grateful to see us there. Over and over and over again, we heard ‘Thank you so much for being here,’ ‘Thank you for coming,’ from the Kennedy Center staff.”
The staff weren’t the only ones who seemed happy at the act of defiance.
“We walked in together so we would have an opportunity to get a response,” said Tara Hoot, who has performed at the Kennedy Center in full drag before. “It was all applause, cheers, and whistles, and remarkably it was half empty. I think that was season ticket holders kind of making their message in a different way.”
Despite the love from the audience and staff, Mari Con Carne said she couldn’t help feeling unsettled when Trump walked in.
“I felt two things — disgust and frustration,” Carne said. “Obviously, I don’t align with anything the man has to say or has to do. And the frustration came because I wanted to do more than just sit there. I wanted to walk up to him and speak my truth — and speak for the voices that were being hurt by his actions right now.”
They weren’t the only ones who felt this way according to Vagenesis:
“Somebody shouted ‘Fuck Trump’ from the rafters. I’d like to think that our being there encouraged people to want to express themselves.”
The group showing up in drag and expressing themselves was, they all agreed, an act of defiance.
“Drag has always been a protest, and it always will be a sort of resistance,” Carne said, after pointing out her intersectional identity as “queer, brown, Mexican immigrant” makes her existence that much more powerful as a statement. “My identity, my art, my existence — to be a protest.”
Hoot, who is known for her drag story times, explained that protesting can look different than the traditional holding up signs and marching for some.
“Sometimes protesting is just us taking up space as drag artists,” Hoot added. “I felt like being true to who you are — it was an opportunity to live the message.”
And that message, Ricky Rosé pointed out, was ingrained with the institution of the Kennedy Center and art itself — it couldn’t be taken away, regardless of executive orders and drag bans
“The Kennedy Center was founded more than 50 years ago as a place meant to celebrate the arts in its truest, extraordinary form,” said Ricky Rosé. “President Kennedy himself even argued that culture has a great practical value in an age of conflict. He was quoted saying, ‘the encouragement of art is political in the most profound sense, not as a weapon in the struggle, but as an instrument of understanding the futility of struggle’ and I believe that is the basis of what the Kennedy Center was founded on, and should continue. And drag fits perfectly within it.”
All four drag performers told the Washington Blade — independently of one another — that they don’t think Trump truly understood the musical he was watching.
“I don’t think the president understands any kind of plot that’s laid out in front of him,” Vagenesis said. “I’m interested to see what he thinks about “Les Mis,” a play about revolution against an oppressive regime. I get the feeling that he identifies with the the rebellion side of it, instead of the oppressor. I just feel like he doesn’t get it. I feel it goes right over his head.”
“Les Misérables” is running at the Kennedy Center until July 13.
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