Opinions
Understanding trans identity from a therapy perspective
Navigating friendships, romantic relationships, other facets of daily existence

The trans identity has been written about extensively from a political perspective. Many columns in the Blade, and other outlets, speak of gender ID laws, barriers in trans healthcare, pronouns, trans representation in state legislatures and eventually Congress, and the legality of offering trans children hormone blockers, among other treatments.
While speaking of politics can be good, it’s equally important to understand trans lives from the perspective of someone with a social work degree — or, in other words, from an emotional and therapeutic perspective.
Trans people, simply put, face many emotional barriers in life that others usually don’t have to encounter. Let me list several here. I don’t have an MSW, but will try my best to articulate these problems in detail.
First and foremost, trans people face lots of change: change in personality, change in appearance, change in passing versus not passing. Whether we like it or not, change invariably means that we have to act differently in the environments that surround us, and when we change as people, we also have to change our behavior and relationships with others. I like to tell friends this saying: “Change is inherently uncomfortable, and change is painful. Moving from one place in life to another means there is lots of growth, but also room for lots of loneliness when you have reached a new personal destination.”
As someone who changed from being a cis female to a man who fully passes as one — and never gets mistaken as trans — this transformation invariably affected my relationships with others. Suddenly, I was expected to make friends with other cis men, some straight, and forming these new relationships took lots of work and necessitated more personal growth. While change can be good, it is also hard, and few others know what it feels like to have to shuffle friendships.
The second emotional barrier trans people face is one that is almost instantly recognizable: our love lives. To be very frank, trans men often go from being an object of sexual desire, as cis females, to being men who repulse many people away. Others view our bodies as disgusting and something to avoid. Many lesbians like to avoid trans men and think that sleeping with us is some form of betrayal to their own community. If trans men are interested in men, we face the problem of wanting to sleep with people who statistically assault us more, and can be violent and degrading to our bodies. Trans people also sleep with people who want to keep our dalliances secret, which shames us into thinking that our bodies are not something to be proud of, but rather monstrous things that can only exist underneath the sheets, and not outside of bedroom doors.
The third emotional hurdle trans people face is that of passing: some of us pass extremely well, but others don’t. There is conflict within the trans community between those who pass and those who don’t. Some in the community view passing as another sign of betrayal to those of our own kin: trans men who pass fully as men are often excluded from queer events or groups. Cis people might think that it’s a choice for us to pass well, when in reality passing is often a result of genetics, as people with thicker jaw lines and more muscle can naturally adopt the other gender better. Passing is a source of envy and jealousy, and ignites fault lines within our community, when in reality, we need less rupture in our community in order to survive as one whole group.
The fourth emotional obstacle trans people face is job security, and managing emotions in the workplace. As a transman who passes well and is never mistaken for gender nonconforming, I can say firsthand that it is easy to never have to talk about being trans at a job. In fact, it usually serves us well to not talk about our transness in career settings, as gender variance is something that cruelly detracts from our career prospects, and rarely adds to career growth. Unfortunately, most workplaces are laden with colleagues — usually male, and usually older — who are transphobic to some extent. Navigating these difficult relationships requires a lot of emotional labor that can otherwise be put into finishing memos, leading meetings, and scaling the corporate ladder. But instead, we’re left to fight old crusty men in cubicles.
There are many more emotional hurdles we face, which can be described in other columns. As stated, it is critical to understand trans lives through an emotional lens, comprehending the difficult feelings we face with friendships, romantic relationships, and other facets of daily existence.
Isaac Amend (he/him/his) is a trans man and young professional in the D.C. area. He was featured on National Geographic’s ‘Gender Revolution’ in 2017 as a student at Yale University. Amend is also on the board of the LGBT Democrats of Virginia. Find him on Instagram @isaacamend.
Opinions
New doc chronicles gay hero’s journey from rape to forgiveness
‘I Am’ embraces message of acceptance, love, compassion

Two award-winning filmmakers produced the documentary film “I Am.” It’s about my Hero’s Journey to overcome a trauma involving anti-LGBT bias. It also features the significant role that the popular comedian Stephen Colbert is playing in this 92,000-mile ongoing mission. A powerfully crafted and impactful film released just in time to celebrate Pride month.
The Arizona filmmakers Ethan and Aidan Sinconis are high school twin brothers. These strong LGBT allies were awarded the best student film in the U.S. in 2024, beating out more than 2,000 entries. The guys then followed up that major accomplishment by using their artistic talent to take on this bold, new film project telling my story to the world.
I shared my adventure with Blade readers back in late 2023 after I experienced a brutal rape and beating at the hands of three men who entered my Phoenix home. I sustained significant injuries.
It was determined that anti-LGBT bias was involved in the police response. I made a chilling 911 call for help. The dispatcher listened helplessly as I was being attacked during that phone call. The three men were surrounding me in the bloody crime scene when the four officers arrived. Three smoking guns. No arrests were made.
History has shown that LGBT folks can’t always rely on the criminal justice system to be there for us. But we can still find peace, happiness, love, and success. The film addresses how I’ve been doing that by continuing on this exhilarating and riveting journey that’s now taken me across the U.S. and Mexico in pursuit of my goal for 3,473 consecutive days and counting.
The film explains the connection to “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert.” A fortuitous moment of laughter from that TV comedy show stopped me from dying by suicide at 10:44 p.m. on Nov. 2, 2015. That was the call to action I answered.
That spark sent me heading out on an adventure. To learn how to re-engage and trust people again after badly isolating. To learn how to process the anti-LGBT bias and trauma, and to get written support from total strangers in my dedicated mission to become a guest on “The Late Show” at 53rd and Broadway in NYC.
But this documentary is far more than a story about me and my efforts to escape the abyss, despair, and depression that had cloaked me in darkness for so long. This is also a story of 34,291 complete strangers from all walks of life coming together one at a time to help a guy in trouble.
The documentary has elements of the classic movie “It’s a Wonderful Life” in it. Especially the memorable part where Uncle Billy tells George Bailey, “Mary did it, George. Mary did it. She told a few people you were in trouble, and they scattered all over town collecting money. They didn’t ask any questions. Just said if George is in trouble. Count on me.”
That’s what these 34,291 Good Samaritans did for me as I scattered all over the country meeting them. They didn’t ask any questions. They heard I was in trouble and trying to recover from the trauma and get to a goal. They each let me know through their kindness, hugs, and written words that I could count on them.
Perhaps what I like the most about the film is how Ethan and Aidan laid the foundation for who “I Am.” They show that I Am a brother, colleague, son, spouse, survivor, nephew, neighbor, grandson, uncle, friend, and cousin. I Am plenty more than just a gay man. I Am Blake.
Back in the summer of 2020, Pope Francis mailed a personal letter to me and expressed his gratitude for sharing my story with him. Gosh how I wish he was alive to see this completed film. It would have made his heart full. He was all about what this documentary represents. It’s not about revenge, anger, hatred, or sadness. It’s about acceptance, unity, love, empathy, compassion, and forgiveness.
It’s understandable for us in the LGBT community to want to respond with anger in situations like this. Our community has been through centuries of harassment, bullying, discrimination, and bias. But I’ve realized it’s more productive and healing to move past the anger. To use our energy to inform, entertain, and inspire individuals.
That’s what this documentary is about. A beautiful message of hope, support, and optimism for Pride month and beyond. A stand up and cheer film proudly coming out of our resilient community. Fingers crossed for an Academy Award nomination for “I Am.” Much deserved for a film very well done by Ethan and Aidan.
The documentary “I Am” can be found at SinconisStudios.com or on YouTube.
Ron Blake lives in Phoenix and can be reached at [email protected] or @BlakeLateShow on Instagram.
Opinions
US hate groups fuel anti-LGBTQ rights movement in Africa
Anti-LGBTQ conference took place this month in Nairobi

“Protecting and Promoting Family Values in Challenging Times.” This was the theme of the 2nd annual Pan-African Conference on Family Values that concluded last week in Nairobi, Kenya.
For months, organizers have been inundating local media with advertisements, promising to equip participants with tools to “safeguard our values.” One highly circulated poster even boasts U.S. Secretary of State Marco Rubio as a special invited guest (though he did not attend.) And each mention sent chills down our spines.
This conference, one of several planned across Africa, was sponsored by U.S.-based anti-rights groups including the Family Research Council, the Political Network for Values and the Center for Family and Human Rights, each known for targeting LGBTQI+ and reproductive rights worldwide. To those of us in the LGBTQI+ community who’ve been fighting rising homophobia, this conference was more than a convening. A gauntlet is being thrown down, one that will fuel the momentum of anti-rights efforts in Kenya, one that threatens all of Africa.
To be sure, this burden is not ours alone to bear. The actors pushing their bigoted agenda in Kenya and beyond are the same ones driving policies that block abortion access, whip up anti-immigration sentiments and spread transphobia in the U.S. and beyond. It is imperative that all communities (local and international) jealously guard against such maneuvering. These hatemongers are taking aim at our sovereignty and social constructs. They seek to woo with the proverbial beads and cloth, while simultaneously annexing that which we hold dear. This is not just an LGBTQI+ issue. This is about our inherent human rights and dignity. We need to hold the line.
In Kenya, we knew our hard-won gains for the LGBTQI+ community were in jeopardy when President William Ruto came into office in 2022. He has since been very vocal about his conservative views, perhaps reluctant to alienate himself from his predominantly Christian religious leader sycophants. Nevertheless, we’ve won significant legal battles in recent years, including in 2023 when the Kenyan Supreme Court ruled that LGBT organizations can legally register with words like “gay” and “lesbian” in their names.
Over the years, however, the anti-rights movement has been cultivating allies across Africa to further their agenda. Organizations like Family Watch International, Center for Family and Human Rights and the World Congress of Families (all deemed hate groups by the Southern Poverty Law Center) have made inroads with influential political leaders with talk of the “natural family,” a narrative that espouses the Western ideal of a nuclear family. In reality, these views run counter to traditional African communal views on family. It is ironic, therefore, that anti-rights actors accuse the gay rights movement of importing Western ideas even as they are readily adopting Western cultural norms.
Our political leaders are being indoctrinated into a culture of hate and division. And global convenings, like the Pan-African Conference on Family Values, are chief among their propaganda tools. In fact, it was after attending one such gathering, the “V Transatlantic Summit” in New York in 2023, that Kenyan MP Peter Kaluma proposed the Family Protection Bill which seeks to ban same-sex relationships and curtail sexual and reproductive health rights, among other measures.
In the past, we could count on the U.S. to keep our political leaders in check. Not anymore. President Trump’s attacks on the queer community in the U.S. have only emboldened the anti-queer movement in Kenya. Anti-rights groups are coming back with renewed vigor to amend our constitution and dismantle all human rights protections. They are already instigating violence and stirring anti-gay sentiment, particularly on social media. Kenyans are losing their jobs or being overly scrutinized at work. An ever-increasing number of LGBTQ+ community members access our online mental health services in deep distress and anxiety about the future.
We will not back down, however. Ahead of the conference, we delivered a petition signed by more than two dozen human rights activists and groups lambasting Kenya Red Cross for allowing the Pan-African Conference on Family Values to be held at its property, the Boma Hotel. How can an organization dedicated to the health and wellbeing of marginalized groups be complicit in an event that stigmatizes and incites harm against the very same people? We’ve also been organizing and strategizing with our allies around community safety, legal rights, hate crime monitoring, and resource mobilization.
Make no mistake, this hate will not stop with Kenya. This conference was part of a larger playbook, and any victories here will propel the anti-right’s cruel campaign throughout Africa. We only need to look to our neighbor Uganda and their Anti-Homosexuality Act as proof. It is widely known that Family Watch International influenced the drafting of this law. The same language that criminalizes homosexuality and imposes the death penalty in certain cases was copied and pasted into Kenya’s proposed Family Protection Bill.
Life and liberty as we all know it is very much in jeopardy. Some may be living too much in survival mode to see it. But without a doubt, we are all on a rollercoaster ride to a place where no one is safe.
Lorna Dias is the outgoing executive coordinator of galck+, a coalition of 18 LGBTQ+ organizations defending human rights and fighting for equality and justice for all in Kenya. Melody Njuki is a communications officer at Initiative for Equality and Non-Discrimination (INEND).
Opinions
WorldPride begins — let’s hope it ends well
D.C. events kick off despite boycotts, Trump attacks

As WorldPride begins with Trans Pride on May 17,, we can only hope when it is over on June 9t we will all be raving about its success.
When D.C. first got designated as host city in November 2022, after Taiwan didn’t work out, there were initial estimates of 2.5 to 3 million people showing up in D.C. to party and celebrate. We talked about this 50th anniversary of Pride as celebrating five decades of advocacy, visibility, and unity, for the LGBTQ community in Washington, D.C., honoring the past, celebrating the present, and inspiring the future.
Anticipation was greatly tempered when Trump, the felon, racist, anti-trans homophobe, liar, and all-around SOB, won the election in November 2024. Then the planning became more difficult and stressful. But here we are and the excitement is palpable. The signs are up around D.C. and Mayor Muriel Bowser, who has been so great for the LGBTQ community, is walking a tightrope to keep D.C. afloat, never knowing what the felon in the White House will do next. To her credit, she is doing an amazing job keeping him at bay. But his vicious anti-trans positions, and his general homophobia, have put a cloud over WorldPride. His immigration policies have led countries around the world to tell their citizens to be very wary if they come to the United States. It is projected as foreign tourists stay away, the United States could lose $12.5 billion this year.
Despite all that, the people at Capital Pride Alliance, who are running WorldPride, have done a commendable job of putting together a program for everyone. From the Human Rights Conference, to the parade, to the festival, where Cynthia Erivo will perform. Shakira will be doing the opening concert at Nat’s stadium, and there are more superstars at the dance party at the RFK site, that should be the site of the new Commanders domed stadium by 2030.
But let us never forget all this is taking place at a time when the United States has a president who is creating havoc in the world and embarrassing us even among our allies. He is a liar and a grifter, a man who thinks nothing of putting people’s lives in danger whether it is sending people illegally to prisons in El Salvador, or creating a culture so nasty, a trans person takes their life in their hands just walking down the street.
He surrounds himself with people like Stephen Miller who wants to suspend habeas corpus, and his Nazi sympathizing co-president, Elon Musk, who just got Trump to invite a bunch of racist South Africans to move here. It’s going on while we have a Secretary of HHS, RFK, Jr., who takes his grandchildren swimming in a polluted creek, and tells others to risk their children’s lives by avoiding vaccines. A president who has cut $800 million in grants from NIH meant to do research to save lives in the LGBTQ community, along with cutting grants and programs that have worked successfully to save people in Africa from dying of HIV/AIDS, malaria, and polio. This is what we are dealing with. Like it or not, this is the backdrop to WorldPride 2025.
Yet, if we give in to this horror, we make it even worse. WorldPride is a way we say to people here in the United States, and those around the world, we in the LGBTQ community are never going back into the closet. We are proud, we are smart, and we are valuable. We make the world a better place, and we will continue to do so despite the pig who occasionally sits in the Oval Office when he is not out golfing or grifting. We can never allow the gay Republicans who make excuses for him, the gay Secretary of the Treasury who has yet to speak out for his community, to go unchallenged. Their silence hurts us as much as the felon sitting in the Oval Office because as the Blade wrote, they are traitors. It is unfortunate, but once again the slogan silence = death has never been more real.
So, speak up, speak out, never stay quiet. Let the world know you are here, and you care. Your life is important and fuck them if they don’t understand that or value it.
Peter Rosenstein is a longtime LGBTQ rights and Democratic Party activist.