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Obstacles in the aisle

Local couple overcomes adversity, enters Crate & Barrel wedding contest

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Washington residents Jonathan Howard (left) and Gregory Jones are hoping to strike it big in a Crate & Barrel-sponsored wedding contest. (Photos by Heather Lyons; courtesy of Howard and Jones)

It began as little more than a lark, but a Washington gay couple entered a Crate & Barrel wedding contest and have been shocked to find friends and allies have catapulted them to the top of a huge list of nearly 200 couples hoping to nab the top prize of a $100,000 company-sponsored wedding.

Jonathan Howard, who’s 29 and just 11 days younger than his partner, Gregory Jones, discovered the contest in a Crate & Barrel e-mail. They moved to D.C. together in 2008 and got engaged in October when Howard popped the question. They’re planning to take advantage of the District’s new same-sex marriage law, which went into effect this week, but having an extra $100,000 would obviously sweeten the deal.

Howard and Jones were in second place as of press time with 5,906 votes. They’d previously been in the lead. A Chicago police officer who was paralyzed in the line of duty, Densey Cole, is in first place with Mary Cole with 10,677 votes, but they may be disqualified — they’re already married, having wed in the hospital when he awoke from a coma following the May 2009 accident. They’re hoping for an ocean-side ceremony to renew their vows. The rules state couples entering the contest must be engaged.

Howard says it would be amazing if they win.

“It would be great for us but more than that for the community to really say, ‘Hey, we’re a normal couple and we’re getting married and it doesn’t matter if it’s two men,'” Howard says. “This company is supporting us and it’s a great story, it’s a great step for marriage equality but in a completely different venue, not political at all. I would be shocked and amazed and overwhelmed and overjoyed and it would be just great for everybody involved.”

So how did these two average Joes convince nearly 6,000 people to vote for them? A lot of it stems from a tragedy they only hinted at in their 100-word online bio. Howard made a lot of friends and contacts in the gay community following an August 2008 hate crime attack. He and three friends were in Boston, where he went to college and lived at the time, when it happened.

“We were walking home and a group of four guys pulled up to us in a car,” Howard says. “I turned around to see what the commotion was and the last thing I remember is hearing, ‘Die, faggot, die,’ as they stomped my head into the pavement.”

Howard says he’s lucky he wasn’t seriously hurt in the attack. His attacker, Fabio Brandao, eventually pleaded guilty but received a two-year suspended sentence that let him get by without any jail time, an outrage, Howard says.

He met hundreds of gay activists and friends after the attack and was friends with many of them on Facebook. When they heard he and Jones were soliciting votes, they rallied in support. The Gay & Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation wrote about the couple spurring more votes and Jones’ brother’s fiance in Chicago, Katie Lindner, went on a mini-crusade of sorts helping them get the word out. She’s working on a graduate degree in Chicago on new media and says the Facebook phenomenon is fascinating to observe.

“People kind of think of [Facebook] as this thing that doesn’t seem important, that wastes your time and fills your day, but it gives me chills to see how much support there’s been for them,” Lindner says. “It’s bigger than any one individual could achieve.”

“I think people see our story as a nightmare with a fairy tale ending,” Jones says. “We went through this horrible thing together and it made us better, stronger people and brought us closer to each other.”

Though the votes are important, it will ultimately be up to a panel of judges to decide who wins. Several prizewinners will be selected from among the top 50 vote getters by Crate & Barrel employees.

Is it realistic to hope the company might select a gay couple for one of the top prizes, even the $100,000 grand prize? Vickie Lang, manager of public relations and community affairs for Crate & Barrel, says it’s certainly possible and that the gay-friendly company is open to it.

“Ultimately our role is to be a resource to any couple celebrating a wedding, a commitment ceremony or any of that,” Lang says. “As part of that, we’re celebrating inclusiveness and we’re excited about that. … We’re looking for couples who really reflect the Crate & Barrel lifestyle, whether they’re same-sex couples or heterosexual couples.”

And just what is the “lifestyle”? Lang mentions “Timeless, classic, high quality, clean, vibrant and comfortable — things for a warm, approachable lifestyle.”

There’s been an ugly side to the contest, though. Anonymous Chicago blogger Detective Shaved Longcock, who knows and supports the Coles, wrote in comments that have since been removed from his blog: “A gay couple is giving Densey and Mary Cole a run for their money? Let’s really get the vote out for one of our own. … I am not politically correct and never will be. Period! I am not going to let this fruit loop couple beat one of our own!”

That posting inspired a litany of anti-gay anonymous posts against Howard and Jones including, “these are all guys who can’t please a woman,” “faggots deserve to die,” “Homos are as sick as child molesters and rapists,” “I hope they all catch HIV,” and more.

But there’s also been an upside. Jones says he’s heard from people who harassed him with anti-gay slurs in school who’ve now voted for he and Howard to win. One even apologized.

“I can’t even put it into words,” Jones says. “It’s a warm and amazing feeling.”

A handful of other same-sex couples are also in the contest. One couple, Ed and Erwin, who have two adopted sons, are facing Erwin’s terminal lung cancer and hope to wed before he dies. They have more than 1,000 votes.

If they win, Howard and Jones would like to wed on their anniversary — Oct. 10 (10/10/10). If not, they’ll likely bump to April 2011.

Regardless of how it turns out, they’re happy to have found each other and thrilled that they can marry in Washington.

“It is so affirming that this is our nation’s capital and this happening right here around people making our rights, laws and liberties,” Jones says. “It also makes a huge statement that Congress had the ability to veto this and they did not. It sends a really positive message that this needs to be accepted and that we are equal and deserve every right that every other couple in this country deserves.”

To vote, go to www.ultimateweddingcontest.com and register an e-mail address. Howard and Jones are couple number 22682.

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Rehoboth Beach

BLUF leather social set for April 10 in Rehoboth

Attendees encouraged to wear appropriate gear

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Diego’s in Rehoboth Beach will host a BLUF leather social on Friday, April 10 at 5 p.m. (Blade file photo by Michael Key)

Diego’s in Rehoboth Beach hosts a monthly leather happy hour. April’s edition is scheduled for Friday, April 10, 5-7 p.m. Attendees are encouraged to wear appropriate gear. The event is billed as an official event of BLUF, the free community group for men interested in leather. After happy hour, the attendees are encouraged to reconvene at Local Bootlegging Company for dinner, which allows cigar smoking. There’s no cover charge for either event.

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District of Columbia

Celebrations of life planned for Sean Bartel

Two memorial events scheduled in D.C.

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(Washington Blade file photo by Michael Key)

Two celebrations of life are planned for Sean Christopher Bartel, 48, who was found deceased on a hiking trail in Argentina on or around March 15. Bartel began his career as a television news reporter and news anchor at stations in Louisville, Ky., and Evansville, Ind., before serving as Senior Video Producer for the D.C.-based International Brotherhood of Electrical Workers union from 2013 to 2024.

A memorial gathering is planned for Friday, April 10, 11:30 a.m.-1:30 p.m. at the IBEW International Office (900 7th St., N.W.), according to a statement by the DC Gay Flag Football League, where Bartel was a longtime member. A celebration of life is planned that same evening, 6-8 p.m. at Trade (1410 14th St., N.W.). 

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District of Columbia

D.C. Council member honored by LGBTQ homeless youth group

Doni Crawford receives inaugural Wanda Alston Legacy Award

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Wanda Alston Foundation Director Cesar Toledo presents the Wanda Alston Legacy Award to DC Councilmember Doni Crawford at an April 7 award event at Crush Bar. (Washington Blade photo by Lou Chibbaro, Jr.)

About 100 people turned out Tuesday evening, April 7, for a presentation by D.C.’s Wanda Alston Foundation of its inaugural Wanda Alston Legacy Award  to D.C. Council member Doni Crawford (I-At-Large) for her support for the foundation’s mission to support homeless LGBTQ youth. 

Among those who attended the event was Japer Bowles, director of D.C. Mayor Muriel Bowser’s Office of LGBTQ Affairs, who delivered an official proclamation issued by Bowser declaring April 7, 2026 “A Day of Remembrance for Wanda Alston.”

Alston, a beloved women’s and LGBTQ rights activist, served as the city’s first director of the then newly created Office of LGBTQ Affairs under then-Mayor Anthony Williams from 2004 until her death by murder on March 16, 2005.

To the shock and dismay of fellow LGBTQ rights advocates, police and court records reported Alston, 45, was stabbed to death inside her Northeast D.C. house by a man high on crack cocaine who lived nearby and who stole her credit cards and car. The perpetrator, William Martin Parrott, 38, was arrested by D.C. police the next day and later pleaded guilty to second-degree murder. He was sentenced in July 2005 to 24 years in prison. 

Crawford was among those attending the award event who reflected on Alston’s legacy and outspoken advocacy for LGBTQ and feminist causes.

“I am deeply humbled and honored to receive this inaugural award,” Crawford told the Washington Blade at the conclusion of the event. “I think the world of Wanda Alston. She has set such a great foundation for me and other Council members to build on,” she said.

“Her focus on inclusivity and intersectionality is really important as we approach this work,” Crawford added. “And it’s going to guide my work at the Council every day.”

Crawford was appointed to the D.C. Council in January of this year to replace then Council member Kenyan McDuffie (I-At-Large), who resigned to run for D.C. mayor as a Democrat. She is being challenged by four other independent candidates in a June 16 special election for the Council seat.

Under the city’s Home Rule Charter written and approved by Congress, the seat is one of two D.C. Council at-large seats that cannot be held by a “majority party” candidate, meaning a Democrat.

A statement released by the Alston Foundation last month announcing Crawford’s selection for the Wanda Alston Legacy Award praised Crawford’s record of support for its work on behalf of LGBTQ youth. 

“From behind the scenes to now serving as an At-Large Council member, she has fought fearlessly for affordable housing, LGBTQ+ funding priorities, and racial justice,” the statement says. “Council member Crawford’s leadership reflects the same courage and conviction that defined Wanda’s legacy.”

Organizers of the event noted that it was held on what would have been Wanda Alston’s 67th birthday.

“Today’s legacy reception was a smashing success,” said Cesar Toledo, the Alston Foundation’s executive director. “Not only did we come together to celebrate Wanda Alston on her birthday, but we also were able to raise over $10,000 for our homeless LGBTQ youth here in D.C.,” Toledo told the Blade.    

“In addition to that, we celebrated and we acknowledged a rising star in our community,” he said. “And that is At-Large Council member Doni Crawford, who we named the inaugural Wanda Alston Legacy Award recipient.”

At the request of D.C. Council Chair Phil Mendelson (D-At-Large) the Council voted unanimously on Jan. 20, 2026, to appoint Crawford to the Council seat being vacated by McDuffie.

Council records show she joined McDuffie’s Council staff in 2022 as a policy adviser and later became his legislative director before McDuffie appointed her as staff director for the Council’s Committee on Business and Economic Development for which McDuffie served as chair.

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