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Obstacles in the aisle

Local couple overcomes adversity, enters Crate & Barrel wedding contest

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Washington residents Jonathan Howard (left) and Gregory Jones are hoping to strike it big in a Crate & Barrel-sponsored wedding contest. (Photos by Heather Lyons; courtesy of Howard and Jones)

It began as little more than a lark, but a Washington gay couple entered a Crate & Barrel wedding contest and have been shocked to find friends and allies have catapulted them to the top of a huge list of nearly 200 couples hoping to nab the top prize of a $100,000 company-sponsored wedding.

Jonathan Howard, who’s 29 and just 11 days younger than his partner, Gregory Jones, discovered the contest in a Crate & Barrel e-mail. They moved to D.C. together in 2008 and got engaged in October when Howard popped the question. They’re planning to take advantage of the District’s new same-sex marriage law, which went into effect this week, but having an extra $100,000 would obviously sweeten the deal.

Howard and Jones were in second place as of press time with 5,906 votes. They’d previously been in the lead. A Chicago police officer who was paralyzed in the line of duty, Densey Cole, is in first place with Mary Cole with 10,677 votes, but they may be disqualified — they’re already married, having wed in the hospital when he awoke from a coma following the May 2009 accident. They’re hoping for an ocean-side ceremony to renew their vows. The rules state couples entering the contest must be engaged.

Howard says it would be amazing if they win.

“It would be great for us but more than that for the community to really say, ‘Hey, we’re a normal couple and we’re getting married and it doesn’t matter if it’s two men,'” Howard says. “This company is supporting us and it’s a great story, it’s a great step for marriage equality but in a completely different venue, not political at all. I would be shocked and amazed and overwhelmed and overjoyed and it would be just great for everybody involved.”

So how did these two average Joes convince nearly 6,000 people to vote for them? A lot of it stems from a tragedy they only hinted at in their 100-word online bio. Howard made a lot of friends and contacts in the gay community following an August 2008 hate crime attack. He and three friends were in Boston, where he went to college and lived at the time, when it happened.

“We were walking home and a group of four guys pulled up to us in a car,” Howard says. “I turned around to see what the commotion was and the last thing I remember is hearing, ‘Die, faggot, die,’ as they stomped my head into the pavement.”

Howard says he’s lucky he wasn’t seriously hurt in the attack. His attacker, Fabio Brandao, eventually pleaded guilty but received a two-year suspended sentence that let him get by without any jail time, an outrage, Howard says.

He met hundreds of gay activists and friends after the attack and was friends with many of them on Facebook. When they heard he and Jones were soliciting votes, they rallied in support. The Gay & Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation wrote about the couple spurring more votes and Jones’ brother’s fiance in Chicago, Katie Lindner, went on a mini-crusade of sorts helping them get the word out. She’s working on a graduate degree in Chicago on new media and says the Facebook phenomenon is fascinating to observe.

“People kind of think of [Facebook] as this thing that doesn’t seem important, that wastes your time and fills your day, but it gives me chills to see how much support there’s been for them,” Lindner says. “It’s bigger than any one individual could achieve.”

“I think people see our story as a nightmare with a fairy tale ending,” Jones says. “We went through this horrible thing together and it made us better, stronger people and brought us closer to each other.”

Though the votes are important, it will ultimately be up to a panel of judges to decide who wins. Several prizewinners will be selected from among the top 50 vote getters by Crate & Barrel employees.

Is it realistic to hope the company might select a gay couple for one of the top prizes, even the $100,000 grand prize? Vickie Lang, manager of public relations and community affairs for Crate & Barrel, says it’s certainly possible and that the gay-friendly company is open to it.

“Ultimately our role is to be a resource to any couple celebrating a wedding, a commitment ceremony or any of that,” Lang says. “As part of that, we’re celebrating inclusiveness and we’re excited about that. … We’re looking for couples who really reflect the Crate & Barrel lifestyle, whether they’re same-sex couples or heterosexual couples.”

And just what is the “lifestyle”? Lang mentions “Timeless, classic, high quality, clean, vibrant and comfortable — things for a warm, approachable lifestyle.”

There’s been an ugly side to the contest, though. Anonymous Chicago blogger Detective Shaved Longcock, who knows and supports the Coles, wrote in comments that have since been removed from his blog: “A gay couple is giving Densey and Mary Cole a run for their money? Let’s really get the vote out for one of our own. … I am not politically correct and never will be. Period! I am not going to let this fruit loop couple beat one of our own!”

That posting inspired a litany of anti-gay anonymous posts against Howard and Jones including, “these are all guys who can’t please a woman,” “faggots deserve to die,” “Homos are as sick as child molesters and rapists,” “I hope they all catch HIV,” and more.

But there’s also been an upside. Jones says he’s heard from people who harassed him with anti-gay slurs in school who’ve now voted for he and Howard to win. One even apologized.

“I can’t even put it into words,” Jones says. “It’s a warm and amazing feeling.”

A handful of other same-sex couples are also in the contest. One couple, Ed and Erwin, who have two adopted sons, are facing Erwin’s terminal lung cancer and hope to wed before he dies. They have more than 1,000 votes.

If they win, Howard and Jones would like to wed on their anniversary — Oct. 10 (10/10/10). If not, they’ll likely bump to April 2011.

Regardless of how it turns out, they’re happy to have found each other and thrilled that they can marry in Washington.

“It is so affirming that this is our nation’s capital and this happening right here around people making our rights, laws and liberties,” Jones says. “It also makes a huge statement that Congress had the ability to veto this and they did not. It sends a really positive message that this needs to be accepted and that we are equal and deserve every right that every other couple in this country deserves.”

To vote, go to www.ultimateweddingcontest.com and register an e-mail address. Howard and Jones are couple number 22682.

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District of Columbia

Judge rescinds stay-away order in Capital Pride anti-stalking case

Evidence hearing to determine if order should be reinstated against Darren Pasha

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Darren Pasha (Washington Blade photo by Michael Key)

A D.C. Superior Court judge on April 17 rescinded an anti-stalking order he approved in February at the request of Capital Pride Alliance against local LGBTQ activist Darren Pasha. 

In a ruling at a court status hearing, Judge Robert D. Okum agreed with defendant Darren Pasha’s stated concern that the initial order was too broad and did not specify who specifically he must stay at least 100 feet away from, as called for in the order.

Okum ruled on April 17 that the initial order, which he noted was oral rather than written, would be suspended until an evidentiary hearing takes place in which Capital Pride will need to present evidence justifying the need for such an order.   

“I’m fine with scheduling a hearing at which the plaintiff can present evidence, and the defendant can present evidence,” Okum said. “But I’m not fine with just continuing this oral TRO [Temporary Restraining Order] that Mr. Pasha really doesn’t even have notice of. That seems unfair,” he said.

After asking both Pasha and Capital Pride Alliance Attorney Nick Harrison when they would be available for the evidence hearing, Okum set the date for April 27 at 11 a.m. in Superior Court. 

The case began when Capital Pride Alliance, the D.C.-based LGBTQ group that organizes the city’s annual Pride events, filed a Civil Complaint on Oct. 27, 2025, against Pasha, accusing him of engaging in a year-long effort to harass, intimidate, and stalk Capital Pride’s staff, board members, and volunteers.

The complaint was accompanied by a separate motion seeking a restraining order, preliminary injunction, and anti-stalking order prohibiting Pasha from “any further contact, harassment, intimidation, or interference with the Plaintiff, its staff, board members, volunteers, and affiliates.”

In his initial ruling in February, Okum issued an order requiring Pasha to stay at least 100 feet away from Capital Pride staff, board members, and volunteers until the April 17 status hearing. He reduced the stay-away distance from the 200 yards requested by Capital Pride.

Pasha, who has so far represented himself in court without an attorney, has argued in multiple court filings and motions that the Capital Pride stalking allegations are untrue. In his initial 16-page response to the complaint, Pasha said it appears to be a form of retaliation against him for a dispute he has had with Capital Pride and its former board president, Ashley Smith, who has since resigned from the board.

“It is evident that the document is replete with false, misleading, and unsubstantiated assertions,” Pasha’s court response states. 

At the April 17 hearing, Okum also ruled that, as standard procedure for civil complaints such as this one, he has ordered both parties to enter into court-supervised mediation to attempt to reach a settlement rather than go to trial.  

In an earlier ruling Okum denied Pasha’s request for a jury trial, stating that civil cases such as this must undergo a trial with the judge determining the verdict under existing civil court statutes.

The April 17 court hearing was held in a courtroom at the courthouse, but as allowed under current court rules, Capital Pride attorney Harrison and Capital Pride official June Crenshaw participated virtually through a video connection. Pasha attended the hearing in the courtroom. 

“This matter is proceeding through the court in the normal course,” Capital Pride released in a statement. “We look forward to presenting the relevant evidence at the scheduled hearing. Capital Pride Alliance remains committed to maintaining a safe and respectful environment for our staff, volunteers, and community, and to addressing concerns through appropriate channels.”

“This is clearly a case of retaliation,” Pasha told the Blade after the hearing. “Today the judge removed the stay-away order and asked Capital Pride Alliance to present enough evidence and examples to see if a stay-away order should be granted,” he said. “Because Pride is coming up in June, we need to see where this is going.”

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District of Columbia

Gay D.C. police lieutenant arrested on child porn charges

Matthew Mahl once served as head of LGBT Liaison Unit

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Matthew Mahl (Washington Blade file photo by Michael Key)

D.C. police announced on April 14 that they have placed one of their lieutenants, Matthew Mahl, on administrative leave and revoked his police powers after receiving information that he was arrested in Maryland one day earlier.  

Although the initial D.C. police announcement doesn’t disclose the reason for the arrest it refers to a statement by the Harford County, Md. Sheriff’s Office that discloses Mahl has been charged with sexual solicitation of a minor and child porn solicitation.

“On Tuesday, the Harford County Sheriff’s Office contacted MPD’s Internal Affairs Division shortly after arresting Lieutenant Matthew Mahl,” the D.C. police statement says.

“The allegations in this case are extremely disturbing, and in direct contrast to the values of the Metropolitan Police Department,” the statement continues. “MPD’s Internal Affairs Division will investigate violations of MPD policy once the criminal investigation concludes,” it says.

“MPD is not involved in the criminal investigation and was not aware of the investigation until yesterday,” the statement adds.

Mahl served as acting supervisor of the MPD’s then Gay & Lesbian Liaison Unit in 2013 when he held the rank of sergeant. D.C. police officials placed him on administrative leave and suspended his police powers that same year while investigating an undisclosed allegation.

A source familiar with the investigation said Mahl was cleared of any wrongdoing a short time later and resumed his police duties. Around the time he was promoted to lieutenant several years later Mahl took on the role as chairman of the D.C. Police Union, becoming the first known openly gay officer to hold that position.

NBC 4 reports that Mahl, 47, has served on the police force for 23 years and most recently was assigned to the department’s Special Operations Division.

Records related to Mahl’s arrest filed in Harford County District Court, show Sheriff’s Department investigators state in charging documents that he allegedly committed the offenses of Sexual Solicitation of a Minor and Child Porn Solicitation on Monday, April 13, one day before he was arrested on April 14.   

The court records show he was held without bond during his first appearance in court on April 14. A decision on whether he would be released while awaiting trial or continue to be held without bond was scheduled to be determined during an April 15 bond hearing. The outcome of that hearing could not be immediately determined.  

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Maryland

Evan Glass is leaning on his record. Is that enough for Montgomery County’s top job?

Gay county executive candidate pushing for equitable pay, safer streets, and cleaner environment

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Montgomery County Council member Evan Glass, center, speaks to attendees of a meet and greet event at Poolesville Memorial United Methodist Church. (Photo by Meredith Rizzo for the Baltimore Banner)

By TALIA RICHMAN | During a meet-and-greet at Poolesville Memorial United Methodist Church, Evan Glass got his loudest applause of the night with a plan he acknowledged was decidedly unsexy.

“Day one, I’ll hire a director of permitting services,” the county executive candidate said.

Doing so, he added, is a step toward easing the regulatory burdens that can stifle small businesses in Montgomery County.

The only problem? At least one of his fiercest competitors is making a similar pledge.

The rest of this article can be read on the Baltimore Banner’s website.

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