Local
Looking back on the hoopla
Black couples took pride in being first to wed in D.C.
Revs. Darlene Garner and Candy Holmes were married at the Human Rights Campaign headquarters on March 9. (Photo by Joe Tresh)
On the eve of this weekend’s Black Pride festivities, the Blade checked in with two of the first same-sex couples who wed here in March to find out how they’re doing now that the hoopla has subsided, how they’ve fared as gay or lesbian couples among their black friends and families and their thoughts on the importance of Black Pride.
Three of the first couples to wed in Washington on March 9, the first day it was legally possible, were Angelisa Young and Sinjoyla Townsend, Reggie Stanley and Rocky Galloway and Revs. Darlene Garner and Candy Holmes. All three couples exchanged vows and rings at a carefully orchestrated event at Human Rights Campaign headquarters. All three couples are black.
“We were all asked to identify couples we knew locally who were planning to seize the opportunity immediately and we all put feelers out,” says Ellen Kahn, HRC’s family project director.
Garner said she thinks it was a coincidence that all three couples are black, but says it was still significant.
“Washington, D.C. is known by some as a chocolate city, so it was great that the first couples to be married were African-American couples,” she said.
Stanley and Galloway, a couple for six years, said no one would have noticed if all the couples had been white and that although they planned to wed regardless, controversial remarks made by Council member Marion Barry, who’s black and represents D.C.’s predominantly black Ward 8, inspired them to get married as soon as the law would allow. Barry, who’d previously been supportive of gay rights, said last year after voting against a bill to recognize same-sex marriages performed elsewhere in D.C., that his Ward “don’t have but a handful of openly gay residents” and that the majority of his constituents are opposed to same-sex marriage.
“He was basically saying that black gay folks don’t exist in his ward so we thought it was important to be visible and present,” Stanley said. Though he and Galloway live in Ward 4, they said they felt it important to show Barry there are many black gay D.C. residents.
Garner and Holmes, who had dated off and on for 14 years, said they decided to wed immediately for several reasons, some practical, others symbolic. As ordained ministers in the Fellowship of Metropolitan Community Churches, a liberal, mostly gay Christian denomination, they felt it was important to make a public stand.
“We recognized in many ways our place as role models as both representative of the black community and the LGBT community locally,” Garner said. “So we were happy to take our stand as a legally married couple standing side by side through the struggles.”
Garner works full-time in ministry but Holmes ministers part-time while also holding a full-time government job. She said that was also a factor in their decision to wed at HRC.
“None of it was lost on us,” Holmes said. “Being a couple and being African American and being lesbian, and with me being a federal government worker and also clergy, that’s a lot and so there are a lot of voices and things we represent, so it’s something we took very seriously and I think that’s significant.”
Stanley knew some HRC leaders through his own LGBT activism work.
“HRC was very forward looking and they were really interested in showing all aspects of what marriage can look like both here and across the country,” he said. “They realized there would be national coverage so I think they realized it was important for this visual to be seen.”
Garner and Holmes initially planned to make themselves available on HRC’s behalf to help field press inquiries and counter the anti-gay marriage stances several local black clergy, such as Bishop Harry Jackson of Hope Christian Church, had taken.
“We were initially going to fly away somewhere and get married,” Garner said. “But when it became clear that we could get married here, they asked if we’d like to do it with them. It became kind of a collaboration.”
Was there any concern their special day would become a circus? Both couples said HRC handled the day so well, it didn’t feel that way.
“There really was no media barrage at all,” Galloway said.
The women agree.
“We were able to experience the typical giddiness of any engaged couple looking forward to their wedding,” Garner said. “HRC did a phenomenal job and our primary focus stayed on the fact that we were getting married. We did not take into consideration at all that the world might be watching.”
Garner and Holmes plan a religious ceremony during their denomination’s annual conference in Acapulco in June.
The couples met standing in line that morning to get their licenses. They had their ceremonies at HRC in the order they got their licenses.
“We all cried and applauded and supported one another,” Holmes said. “Then when one came back, the next couple marched in so we were all there together, then we had a joint reception.”
“It was lovely,” Garner said. “HRC converted one of their big meeting rooms into a wedding chapel and we were able to create the ceremony we wanted to have from processional to recessional, with music and presiders and everything just as we wanted.”
The couples — Young and Townsend did not respond to interview requests — said life has returned to normal after the barrage of media attention.
“Things are great,” Galloway said. “Just like with any wedding, there’s a lot of activity leading up to it, but we’re back to a normal life now.”
Both couples said they encountered zero negative feedback but were greeted with many cheers, applause and congratulations, both on the day itself and after.
“People have recognized me and stop me in the hall to congratulate me,” Holmes said. “It’s been wonderful.”
And both couples say Black Pride remains important. Some of the reasons why, they said, popped up during the marriage wars, with the Barry incident and elsewhere.
“We were more active with it in our single days than in later years,” Galloway said. “But it’s still important to show diversity among the gay community. It’s a wonderful weekend and continues to be a very important event.”
Garner and Holmes will be out of town this weekend but said they fully support Black Pride. Garner, one of the founders of the National Coalition of Black Lesbians and Gays, said misperceptions about black gays persist.
“There’s still this perception that all gay people are white and that all black people are straight and many people really cling to that myth,” she said. “So it’s especially important for black LGBT people to come out, be visible and speak out so we continue to break down the barriers that other people have constructed to keep us all segregated from each other.”
Virginia
Gay Va. couple hopeful voters will enshrine marriage equality in state constitution
Early voting has already begun in the state
A referendum on whether to enshrine marriage equality in Virginia’s constitutional amendment is on the ballot this year.
If voters approve Question 2, it will codify the U.S. Supreme Court’s Obergefell ruling in 2015 that extended marriage rights to same-sex couples across the country — gays and lesbians have been able to legally marry in Virginia since Oct. 6, 2014.
Rob Bookbinder and James Fisher are a married couple who live in Arlington.
They have been together for 38 years — Bookbinder and Fisher married in 2014.
“We think this is a critical vote to remove this discriminatory language from the constitution and to ensure that going forward, no matter what happens, the state of Virginia will ensure marriage equality,” Fisher told the Washington Blade. “It is it is really difficult and upsetting to think that our current state constitution would prohibit same-sex marriage, even though the federal government overrides that now. There’s no saying what may happen in the future.”
Bookbinder said it was important for him and Fisher to get married “to gain social equality.”
“I was surprised how good it felt, how important it was to begin to say, ‘my husband rather than my partner,'” Bookbinder said.
Bookbinder then explained why it feels good to be married.
“Is it a legal partner, a business partner, a tennis partner, you know, or a romantic partner? But when you say my husband James, everyone knows exactly what you mean and confers an equal status with everyone else who’s married, and we were both surprised at how good it felt and how equal it felt to suddenly be married and be able to state that you were married and discuss your husband rather than your partner, and I would hate to lose that,” he said.
Bookbinder and Fisher said they are hopeful that voters will approve the amendment, noting Virginia has become more progressive over the years.
“I think people have, with the Supreme Court decision, people have seen that a same-sex marriage is just a marriage,” stated Fisher. “It’s just two people who love each other, and I think more and more people have attended a same-sex marriage, someone in their family or a friend, and the experience of what this is, firsthand experience, is so important in shaping people’s opinions, and I think the period of time that we’ve had since the Obergefell decision has given a lot of voters that experience, which I think is really important and powerful.”
The couple also said the push to enshrine marriage equality in Virginia’s constitution is in response to the Trump-Vance administration.
“And I think due to President Trump doing all the horrible things he’s done to so many groups, including LGBTQ, especially trans people, that Virginians are kind of pushed to be even more progressive to protect those who need protection, which would include the LGBTQ community in terms of marriage equality, so I’m confident it will pass,” said Fisher.
Narissa Rahaman, executive director of Equality Virginia, sent the Blade a statement about early voting on Question 2 that has already begun.
“With early voting now underway, our focus is making sure every Virginian knows Question 2 is on their ballot,” said Rahaman. “The outdated ban on same-sex marriage still in Virginia’s state constitution leaves a gap in protections for the thousands of same-sex couples that call this state home, but after 20 years we have the chance to fix it.”
Log onto www.mobilize.us/vaformarriage to find out more about the campaign in support of Question 2.
By JOHN-JOHN WILLIAMS IV | Those legendary heavy-handed pours, spirited karaoke and trivia nights, and groan-worthy wall-to-wall patrons on packed nights are back!
Leon’s will live to see another day.
Baltimore’s oldest gay bar, which opened in the 1950s, closed in July following the death of its owner, Ron Singer.
The rest of this article can be read on the Baltimore Banner’s website.
The Comings & Goings column is about sharing the professional successes of our community. We want to recognize those landing new jobs, new clients for their business, joining boards of organizations and other achievements. Please share your successes with us at [email protected].
Congratulations to Leigh Miles Jackson, Ph.D., named executive director of The Institute for Health Research & Policy at Whitman-Walker, and Angel Earle, Ph.D. named as chief operating officer, Whitman-Walker Health System.
Upon her appointment Dr. Jackson said, “Under my leadership, I would love for The Institute for Health Research & Policy at Whitman-Walker to be known as a trusted, forward-looking research organization that shapes policies, strengthens practices and creates measurable change for the community.” Dr. Jackson spent 12 years with the National Academies of Sciences, Engineering and Medicine, leading national initiatives on minority-serving institutions and economic evidence for investments in children, youth and families. Dr. Jackson holds an extensive educational background, including postdoctoral fellowships in developmental Psychology and Neurogenomics from Vanderbilt University, a Ph.D. in molecular and systems pharmacology from Emory University and a bachelor’s degree in chemistry from Wake Forest University.
Upon her appointment Dr. Earle said, “When we talk about parity and inequities and research, it’s never just about the dollars that are out there. It’s about making sure that we’re cultivating a change that embraces equity at the heart of everything that it does. As the COO for Whitman-Walker Health System I will be working closely to support The Institute for Health Research & Policy at Whitman-Walker and the Whitman-Walker Foundation to drive advancement in research and support the strategic goals of all of the Whitman-Walker Heath System entities.”
Dr. Earle is a genetic epidemiologist and senior executive. She brings a background from the London School of Economics and the University of South Carolina, with expertise in global health, corporate strategy and socioeconomic policy. She has co-authored peer-reviewed research on cancer genetics, nephrology biomarkers and reproductive genomes.
Dr. Heather Aaron, CEO of Whitman-Walker Health System said, “both leaders bring research-driven expertise and operational strength to the organization as it continues expanding research, health care access, and health outcomes for residents across the Washington, D.C., region, including the LGBTQ+ community, people living with and at risk for HIV, and communities experiencing persistent health disparities.”
The Institute for Health Research & Policy at Whitman-Walker is also expanding its research agenda beyond HIV to address the complex health conditions affecting people living with and at risk for HIV, as well as the broader communities The Institute for Health Research & Policy at Whitman-Walker serves.
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