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Parents reap benefits from working with a doula

Provides guidance throughout journey of pregnancy

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By CLAUDIA BOOKER

A birth doula serves as a personal guide and adviser throughout the pregnancy, labor, birth and immediate post-partum period. Birthing a baby is more than a one-day experience and a doula is there to provide guidance throughout the entire journey, not only labor and birth.

A doula is committed to providing personalized guidance through pregnancy, labor, birth and new parenting — a yearlong journey full of momentous decisions and exciting events.

During this period, the doula and the expecting parent(s) build a trusting and open relationship that shapes the care the doula provides. Getting to know a sensitive and experienced doula over the course of a pregnancy will allow for the most personalized care.

This care includes knowledgeable assistance in evaluating your choice of birth settings and care providers, including specific obstetric practices that would support your birth choices and lifestyle preferences; developing a birth preference plan; and navigating the sometimes overwhelming choices for childbirth preparation classes, exercise, pediatrician, breastfeeding and alternative modalities.

The doula provides in-home sessions and 24-7 email and telephone communication to address any questions and concerns. Once labor begins, the doula is ever-present to optimize communication between you, your partner and labor team and medical professionals as needed; to translate medical jargon; to provide hands-on physical, informational, and emotional support to you and your labor team; and relay your preferences for the care and bonding with the baby at the birth. A doula can correct the care provider and staff assumptions about who’s who at the birth and their role and title.

A doula is a valuable member of the birth team for any family, but LGBT parents-to-be can reap special benefits from working with a doula. Your doula will get to know you over the course of your pregnancy and is there to become educated to your wishes, concerns and preferences — the doula is there to learn what is important and unique about each pregnant/expecting parents.

A relationship will develop that will help put you at ease in the birthing environment where you may be dealing with many attendants, such as hospital staff, for the very first time. Your doula, at this point, will be familiar with you and your family and will work closely with those health care professionals supporting your birth — freeing your mind, body and spirit to focus on your most important task of birthing your baby.

An experienced doula can assist with breastfeeding education and support for lesbian couples (for example, who may both want to breastfeed) and transgender couples. The doula can assist gay men with a surrogate birthing their baby to better understand and support their surrogate in pregnancy, birth and with the transfer of parenting responsibilities (for example skin–to-skin) from the biological mother to the new parents.

The doula provides information, referrals and networks in the Washington metro area specific to your needs and community. In addition, the doula will ensure that the parents have access to quality, non-judgmental training in baby care, feeding, pediatrician selection and diapering options, child care and all of the other issues that new parents face.

As renowned doula Miriam Zoila Perez explains in The Radical Doula Guide, “We introduce a compassionate and understanding element and provide non-judgmental and unconditional support to pregnant and parenting people…much of our work is about leaving our assumptions at the door.”

Claudia Booker is a DONA-certified birth doula and home birth midwife (CPM) and has a birthing services company, Birthing Hands of D.C. Reach her via birthinghandsdc.com or [email protected]

 

 

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Advice

My family voted for Trump and I cut off contact

Now my father is ill and I don’t know what to do

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How should you react when family members support Trump? (Washington Blade file photo by Michael Key)

Dear Michael,

I stopped talking to my family last year because they all voted for Trump. It’s not like they didn’t know whom they were voting for — they’d already had four years of seeing him in action.

I decided that I couldn’t remain in contact with people whom I felt wanted to take away my rights as a gay man. That is what they essentially did by voting for Trump.

They had come to my wedding in 2012, they had welcomed my husband and me into their homes for the holidays for our entire relationship, so I couldn’t believe how little they actually cared about me and my community. I was profoundly hurt.

They’ve reached out but I have been too angry at their hypocrisy to engage in more than a perfunctory way. I miss them, sure, but as I’ve watched our community be attacked, I just get so angry that I don’t want to talk. I certainly don’t want to hear them justify bigotry and hatred.

Now one of my siblings has reached out to let me know that my father’s health is rapidly declining. I’m wondering if I should rethink my decision and reach out to him, maybe even visit, before he dies.

But then I think of ICE’s attack on our country and the removal of the Pride flag from Stonewall and I don’t want to talk to people who support what is happening to vulnerable, marginalized people and the LGBTQ community.

My father was a good father to me. Even when I first came out to him, he was loving and supportive. I can’t square his behavior personally toward me with his support of this regime. The hypocrisy makes me so angry. How could he purport to love me and then vote against my freedoms?

I would love some suggestions about how to square my two opposing viewpoints.

Michael replies:

Many years ago, a great mentor taught me that the one thing you can count on in a relationship is learning to tolerate disappointment: Both being a disappointment, and being disappointed in the other person. This is true for love relationships and it’s also true for other significant relationships. All of us are different in some major ways and so we are bound at times to disappoint our loved ones in major ways, and to be disappointed by them in major ways.

That is why I’m not a fan of purity tests. To expect that someone must think like you (much less vote like you) in order for you to have a relationship with them is unrealistic, impractical, and sometimes damaging.

Of course, a person may hold some beliefs that give you reason not to want to have any connection to them. But is that the case here?

From your description, your family has always been loving and supportive of you as a gay man. That is no small thing. They seem to care about you enough to have continued to reach out, even though you have stopped talking to them. 

Perhaps they had some other reasons for voting as they did, other than to roll back LGBTQ rights and to attack immigrants.

Instead of wondering how they could be so hypocritical, how about talking with them and striving to understand their choices? I don’t know what they will say, and you may hear different answers from your various family members. But at least you will get some clarity, rather than presuming that they made their voting choices from a place of malice. Then you will be in a better position to decide if you want a relationship going forward.

Another point to consider: Very few things are set in stone. Even if your family made their voting choices based on holding positions that you neither like nor respect, they may be open to shifting their views over time. One way to perhaps influence their thinking is by engaging with them, sharing your thoughts, and asking them to consider the possible consequences of their actions. If you choose to re-engage with them, two points to consider: 

First, don’t expect that you will change their minds. You can advocate for what you want, but you have to let go of the results.

Second, they are more likely to consider your points if you do not approach them from a judgmental, self-righteous stance. 

Many years ago, when I was newly a vegetarian, I was eager to challenge and “educate” friends who weren’t following my dietary ideas. Guess what? It didn’t work. Then I got some great advice: A great way to influence others to consider eating fewer animals was to serve them delicious vegetarian food.

The same point is true here. We can’t beat people over the head to agree with us. But if we approach them with some kindness, rather than with the certainty that we hold the moral high ground, we may help them see a bigger picture.

And sometimes, we too may see a bigger picture.

Michael Radkowsky, Psy.D. is a licensed psychologist who works with couples and individuals in D.C., Maryland, Virginia, and New York. He can be found online at michaelradkowsky.com. All identifying information has been changed for reasons of confidentiality. Have a question? Send it to [email protected].

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Real Estate

How to navigate shifting tenant expectations

Remote work driving many changes

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D.C., is one of the top 10 U.S. cities where remote work is most popular. (Photo by dolgachov/Bigstock)

Are you prepared to meet the changing expectations of tenants? Tenant priorities are continuously shifting. As professional property managers, my team has witnessed firsthand the evolving demands of tenants over the last few years. 

Frankly, today’s D.C. residents have high standards. Many have shifted to remote work, and they are placing a growing emphasis on sustainability. And these expectations are poised to evolve even further, with factors like affordability, technology integration, and community-driven amenities taking center stage.

Understanding these changes and adapting your rental to meet the growing demands of tenants and their evolving preferences will not only help you attract high-quality residents but also settle into long-term success in a competitive market. Let’s look at key tenant trends for 2026  in Washington, D.C. by providing practical strategies that help owners and investors navigate this shifting landscape, ensuring your property remains desirable and profitable in an increasingly growing rental market. 

According to Buildium’s 2025 Industry Report, tenant retention is rising, and that’s due to a number of factors. It’s expensive to move, so if residents are enjoying a peaceful and pleasant rental experience and they appreciate where they live, it’s unlikely they will spend more money to live somewhere else. 

The “2026 State of the Property Management Industry Report” also noted the rise of “Resident Benefit Packages,” which has contributed to retaining good residents. When landlords and property managers offer benefits such as protection against late payment fees, online conveniences, credit monitoring, air filter drop shipments, preventative maintenance services, and even concierge amenities, they increase tenant satisfaction and retention.

By investing in resident benefits, you can increase the likelihood of keeping your tenants satisfied. They’re more likely to renew their lease agreements and contribute to the care and upkeep of their home.

Provide smart home tech  

According to data gathered by Nasdaq, Washington, D.C., is one of the top 10 U.S. cities where remote work is most popular, with more than one-third of the population working from home at least part of the time. Even with the federal government calling many people back into the office over the last year, remote work continues to be normalized. Tenants are working and studying from home, and they need their home to support that lifestyle shift.

They’re looking for technology, and that factor provides you the opportunity for you to attract remote workers as residents. While smart home technology was once a fairly niche amenity, it’s now becoming the standard. It’s an expectation of most tenants in Washington, D.C., that at the very least they’ll be able to:

  • Connect to fast Wi-Fi at their home
  • Enjoy online rental payment platforms that are secure and convenient.
  • Make routine maintenance requests through resident portals

It was also recommended considering installing keyless entry systems, offering upgraded security such as video doorbells, investing in smart thermostats, and making it as easy as possible for tenants to integrate their own digital platforms and apps into their home life, whether that’s Alexa or Siri or their own personal AI-driven digital assistant. 

Community-Driven Amenities in Washington, D.C., Rentals

Are you renting out units in a multi-family building or an apartment? Washington, D.C., tenants are focused on community and social connection, and so the demand for community-driven amenities is on the rise. 

In 2026, renters are looking beyond traditional features like gyms or pools, seeking spaces that allow for interaction, well-being, and a sense of belonging. Co-working spaces, communal kitchens, and rooftop gardens are now more popular in buildings that are working to attract tenants who prioritize shared experiences. A recent report from Ronco Construction reports that these are the emerging trends in multi-family housing amenities:

  • Rooftop decks
  • Outdoor lounges
  • Community gardens
  • Fitness studios
  • Dog parks and pet spas
  • Co-working space

Know your tenant pool

If you rent out single-family homes, you’re dealing with tenants who prefer privacy and space. In those multi-family buildings and condo communities, however, tenants are likely looking for opportunities to connect with their neighbors and make friends. We have seen tenants drawn to properties that offer event programming, such as fitness classes, happy hours, or cultural gatherings, helping create a sense of community in a neighborhood atmosphere. 

As an owner, investing in these types of amenities can increase tenant satisfaction, encourage long-term leases, and set your property apart in a competitive market where residents crave more than just a place to live, but also a place to connect.

‘Green Renting’ in D.C. 

Tenants want to save money on energy and utilities. Most of them would also rather do whatever they can to be more conscious of their effect on the planet. The city of Washington, D.C., actively encourages this. According to Building Innovation Hub, Washington, D.C., wants to cut greenhouse gas emissions in half by 2032. More efficient building standards and energy incentives are making that possible. 

Rental property owners can meet tenant expectations around sustainable living and environmental-friendly features by providing LED lighting, energy-efficient appliances, low-flow plumbing fixtures, and modern programs for managing waste and recycling. 

Every tenant in Washington, D.C., is different of course, but there are common expectations that come with residents when they’re looking for a new home. Those highlighted here are even more important to tenants in 2026. 

Find out how to make your Washington, D.C., rental property more competitive on the market. Engage a professional property manager for the advice you need.


Scott Bloom is owner and senior property manager of Columbia Property Management. 

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Real Estate

Surviving spring cleaning

Create a space that feels comfortable, welcoming, and easy to maintain

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It’s that time of year: spring cleaning!

Whether or not you are getting ready to sell your home, spring is finally upon us — you know, the time of year when you can open the windows to a warm breeze and commit to decluttering and thoroughly cleaning your home.

While decluttering, you will be faced with the challenge of what to keep and what to discard. Mysterious items may appear: the missing charger, the set of keys that open nothing, or, with any luck, that one important document you know you put “in a safe place.” The journey often turns into an archaeological dig through the layers of your daily life. Along the way, you will likely encounter objects that have been misplaced or are no longer needed, and you’ll wonder why you kept them in the first place.

The kitchen junk drawer, for example, is a universal catch-all that defies categorization. You might open it looking for a rubber band and instead discover a lone screw of unknown origin, a tube of hardened Super Glue, and at least four pens that no longer work.

Closets offer another layer of surprises, where you can find things that don’t seem to belong at all: cash in a coat pocket, a single glove, a book you meant to read, or a box filled with cables for devices you no longer own.

It’s guaranteed that if you only have one of a pair of something, its mate will appear shortly after you have thrown away the one you had. And, if you were intentionally searching for an item, it will turn up in the last place you look, simply because once you found it, you stopped looking.

Linen closets and bathroom cabinets can also harbor oddities. Now is the time to discard half-used or duplicate products you don’t remember buying, travel-sized toiletries from trips long past, or expired medications.

Under furniture is where things get truly mysterious. Reaching beneath a couch or bed in search of a dropped item often yields a collection of the unexpected: assorted coins, dust-covered pet toys, a missing sock, and perhaps something that makes you pause, like a long-lost piece of jewelry or an object you were convinced had disappeared forever.

Organizing garages and basements takes the experience to another level, where consolidating tools or seasonal decorations stored there can quickly turn into an encounter with objects that defy explanation. Why is there a box of tiles from a renovation that happened a decade ago? Do you really need the instruction manuals for appliances you no longer own? What could possibly be in the box that hasn’t been opened since you moved in?

Even searches within a home office – looking through files, drawers of old electronics, or stacks of paperwork—can yield similarly strange results. I recently found several flash drives with client files from 2014, a cache of notebooks containing names and phone numbers of prospects who left the area 15 years ago, and Turbo Tax installation CDs from as far back as 1997. 

If decluttering hasn’t defeated you, then thoroughly cleaning your house may not be as overwhelming as you might think. Breaking it into manageable steps makes the process far simpler and even satisfying. A consistent method is the key to success.

Before you reach for cleaning supplies, take one last walk through each room and gather items that belong elsewhere for return to their proper place. Put away clothing and take out trash. This step instantly makes your home look better and clears the way for more effective cleaning. Working from top to bottom, dust ceiling fans, light fixtures, shelves, and blinds first so that any debris falls to the floor for addressing later. Use a microfiber cloth or handheld Swiffer to trap dust rather than spreading it around. Don’t forget overlooked areas like the tops of door frames, windowsills, and baseboards.

Move on to surfaces. Wipe down countertops and furniture with appropriate cleaners. Squeegee windows to let the sun shine in. Pay special attention to kitchen appliances. Stovetops, microwaves, and refrigerator handles tend to collect grime quickly, as do the tops of upper cabinets. In bathrooms, disinfect sinks, toilets, tubs, and showers. 

Lastly, vacuum carpets, rugs, draperies, and upholstered surfaces thoroughly, including along edges and under furniture where dust accumulates. For hard floors, sweep first, then mop using a cleaner suitable for the surface type. This final step pulls the whole cleaning effort together and leaves your home feeling and smelling fresh.

Ultimately, cleaning your house doesn’t have to be a daunting chore. With a clear plan and a little consistency, you can create a space that feels comfortable, welcoming, and easy to maintain – at least until this time next year.


Valerie M. Blake is a licensed Associate Broker in D.C., Maryland, and Virginia with RLAH @properties. Call or text her at 202-246-8602, email her at [email protected] or follow her on Facebook at TheRealst8ofAffairs.

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