Living
LGBT books galore slated for spring release
Dozens and dozens of LGBT books — oceans more than any individual could possibly get to — are slated for spring. A few are available now. Among the highlights:
• “Lesbian Love” (Amazon Digital), an anthology of lesbian erotica by authors Elizabeth Coldwell, Beverly Langland, Sommer Marsden and others. Edited by Miranda Forbes. March 5.
• “Microagressions in Everyday Life: Race, Gender and Sexual Orientation” (Wiley) by Derald Wing Sue is an exploration of subtle, often unintentional biases in everyday life and the impact they have on members of traditionally disadvantaged groups. March 8.
• “Sinning in the Rain” (Melrose Books) by Nick Heddle is a novel set in the late ’20s about a young gay gopher at a major Hollywood movie studio who develops a new technique to ease the transition to talkies but has Nazis and a sinister gossip columnist on his heels. Gene and his handsome boyfriend Jamie battle opposition from many directions. March 8.
• “Assuming a Body: Transgender and Rhetorics of Materiality” (Columbia University Press) by Gayle Salamon explores issues of transgender embodiment through phenomenology, psychoanalysis and queer theory. March 15.
• “The Meaning of Gay: Interaction, Publicity and Community Among Homosexual Men in 1960s San Francisco” (Lexington Books) by J. Todd Ormsbee traces the conflicts among San Francisco’s gay men with the dominant society describing the broad range of meanings they came to ascribe to gays between 1962 and 1972. March 16.
• Look for local gay author Garrett Peck May 15 at the Gaithersburg Book Festival where he’ll speak about his book “The Prohibition Hangover: Alcohol in America from Demon Rum to Cult Cabernet” (www.prohibitionhangover.com), released last year.
• “The A to Z of Lesbian Literature” (Scarecrow Press) by Meredith Miller traces the history of lesbian lit through hundreds of cross-referenced dictionary entries on important writers such as Sappho, Colette, Mary Wollstonecraft and others who are less known. March 16.
• “Letting Go” (Bella Books) by Ann O’Leary is a novel about Laura, a 39-year-old uber-successful lesbian with her own advertising agency who is targeted by Kelly, a barhopping charmer used to getting what she wants and Kate, a commercial artist who has brains and talent and a secret crush on Laura. March 15.
• “Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, Transgender and Questioning Teen Literature: a Guide to Reading Interests” (Libraries Unlimited) by Carlisle Webber is, as the title suggests, a guide to outstanding books for LGBT teens that includes fiction, nonfiction, poetry, graphic novels and more. March 30.
• “Hot Stuff: Disco and the Remaking of American Culture” (W.W. Norton & Co.) by Alice Echols explores how disco played a major role in broadening the social realms for blacks, feminists and gays and gave new spaces for gay men to mix in large crowds. March 29.
• “How to Be a Movie Star: Elizabeth Taylor in Hollywood” (Mariner Books), gay author William Mann’s bio of La Liz, comes out in paperback April 1.
• “Watch Us!” (Bruno Gmunder) by Jacob Mott is a gay erotica cartoon book featuring a mix of American bubblegum and Japanese Manga styles. April.
• “Female Force: Ellen DeGeneres” (Bluewater Productions) by Sandra Ruckdeschel is a quickie bio (just 32 pages) on America’s most famous lesbian superstar. March 31.
• “Are We Thinking Straight?: the Politics of Straightness in a Lesbian and Gay Social Movement Organization” (Routledge) by Daniel Cortese explores how the Straight and Gay Alliance (SAGA) strategically used a straight identity as a social movement tool. April 3.
• “Holy Terror: Lies the Christian Right Tells Us to Deny Gay, Lesbian and Transgender Equality” (Alyson Books) by Mel White is the paperback debut of White’s seminal book in which the gay author documents the 30-year war fundamentalist Christians have waged against gays. April 1.
• “The Songs of Hollywood” (Oxford University Press) by Philip Furia and Laurie Patterson is a photo-packed exploration of the use of song in film both in musicals and dramas. April 7.
• “Left in His Closet” (Tate Publishing) by Mary Krome explores the lives of straight women whose husbands left them for other men. April 13.
• “The Essential Gay Mystics” (Harper San Francisco), an anthology compiled by Andrew Harvey, features selections from 60 gay and lesbian writers who explore his theory that notions of sin and sex don’t have to be reconciled for gays and that gay sex is innately spiritual. April 30.
• “Ex-Gay No Way: Survival and Recovery from Religious Abuse” (Findhorn Press) by Jallen Rix, is a first-hand account of the author’s experience attending a Southern Baptist “ex-gay” ministry camp in his youth and how it confused him and ravaged his self-esteem. May 1.
• “The Harvey Milk Interviews: In His Own Words” (Vince Emery Productions) by Harvey Milk contains the texts of nearly 40 interviews the late gay iconoclast did for newspapers, radio and television in which he describes his life, struggles, strategies and dreams. Included are transcripts of three famous political debates Milk conducted with John Briggs and a DVD of a feature-length documentary showing previously unseen TV interviews. May 1.
• “Palm Tress on the Hudson: a True Story of the Mob, Judy Garland & Interior Decorating” (Square One Publishers) by Elliot Tiber is the prequel to his 2007 memoir “Taking Woodstock,” which was adapted for the screen by Ang Lee. June 15. Also look for Susie Boyt’s “My Judy Garland Life: a Memoir,” (Bloomsbury USA) in which the author tells of her Garland obsession and how it led her to meet Mickey Rooney and Liza Minnelli, on April 27.
• “She Looks Just Like You: a Memoir of (Nonbiological Lesbian) Motherhood” (Beacon Press) by Amie Klembnauer Miller is the author’s first-hand account of how she came to terms with the issues of confusion and mixed emotions when her lesbian partner conceived. May 1.
• “Coming Out, Coming Home: Helping Families Adjust to a Gay or Lesbian Child” (Columbia University Press) by Michael LaSala presents the results of his research of 65 gay and lesbian children and their parents when they came out and offers advice for how other families in the same situation can better navigate feelings of depression, anxiety and grief. June 1.
• “Leave the Light On” (Central Recovery Press) by Jennifer Storm is a memoir in which the author shares her tale of alcohol and drugs, her recovery and how it intersected with childhood sexual abuse and her lesbianism. April.

As the spring market hits its stride, we are beginning to see more inventory and an increase in days on the market in parts of the DMV. This may result in professional home inspections becoming routine parts of contract offers again. A thorough home inspection can help catch safety issues early and is an opportunity to learn about the operation and maintenance of items in your home.
Pay attention to flickering lights, frequently tripped breakers, and discolored outlets—these are signs of potential electrical hazards. Outdated wiring, overloaded outlets, and faulty appliances can lead to electrical fires.
Structural issues are often overlooked until it’s too late. Crumbling foundations, weak or damaged stairs, loose railings, and uneven flooring can cause trips and falls. Water damage from leaks or flooding can weaken the integrity of floors and walls, creating a risk of collapse.
Toxic chemicals can pose serious threats to health and safety, often without obvious warning signs. Understanding and addressing these risks is crucial for maintaining a safe living environment for you and your loved ones.
Household products such as cleaners, pesticides, air fresheners, and even cosmetics can emit volatile organic compounds (VOCs). These compounds, when inhaled regularly, can cause a range of health issues including headaches, respiratory problems, hormonal disruptions, and in some cases, even cancer. To minimize these risks, homeowners should opt for low-VOC or VOC-free products, ventilate regularly, and consider investing in an air purifier.
Formaldehyde is another common toxin found in pressed wood products, insulation, and certain paints. Long-term exposure can lead to chronic respiratory problems and has been linked to cancer.
Radon gas, another possible carcinogen, is prevalent in the DMV. Your home inspector can do a radon test or there are DIY kits available at many hardware stores. If levels are above EPA standards, a professional remediation firm can install a system that extracts the radon and vents it safely outdoors.
Carbon monoxide (CO), a colorless, odorless gas, is produced by gas stoves, heaters, and fireplaces. Exposure can lead to headaches, dizziness, nausea, and even death. Install CO detectors near bedrooms and ensure that all fuel-burning appliances are properly maintained and ventilated.
Additionally, older homes may still contain asbestos in insulation, floor tiles, or roofing materials. If disturbed, asbestos fibers can become airborne and are highly dangerous when inhaled, leading to serious diseases such as mesothelioma, so when renovating an older home, it’s critical to have materials tested for asbestos before beginning work.
Mold and mildew thrive in damp, poorly ventilated areas such as bathrooms, basements, and around leaky pipes. While some molds are harmless, others can cause allergic reactions or respiratory problems and aggravate conditions such as asthma. Black mold (Stachybotrys chartarum) is notorious for producing mycotoxins that may lead to severe health issues.
Signs of mold include musty odors, visible growth on walls or ceilings, and excessive humidity. Preventing mold growth requires controlling moisture levels—using dehumidifiers and vapor barriers, fixing leaks promptly, and ensuring adequate ventilation. Professional mold remediation may be necessary for severe infestations.
Though banned in residential paints in 1978, lead-based paint still exists in millions of older homes. Lead exposure is especially dangerous for children, causing developmental delays, learning difficulties, and behavioral issues. Adults are not immune – lead can lead to high blood pressure, kidney damage, and reproductive problems.
Even dust from deteriorating lead-based paint can be hazardous. The EPA recommends professional lead testing for any home built before 1978, especially if renovations are planned. Certified abatement professionals can safely remove or encapsulate lead paint.
Improper use of heating equipment, fireplaces, unattended candles, and cooking accidents are common sources of home fires. Smoke alarms and fire extinguishers are essential for early detection and response. Test smoke detectors monthly and change batteries at least once a year.
Homes that are safe for adults may not be safe for children or pets. Small objects, unsecured cabinets, toxic plants, and open staircases can pose significant risks. Childproofing measures such as outlet covers, safety gates, and cabinet locks, along with safe storage of chemicals and medications, are essential precautions.
The good news is that many of these risks can be mitigated with awareness and action. Here are a few simple steps to enhance home safety:
• Conduct a thorough safety audit using checklists available online.
• Ensure proper ventilation to reduce indoor air pollutants.
• Regularly check for leaks and signs of water damage.
• Keep cleaning and chemical products out of reach of children.
• Educate all household members about emergency procedures, including fire escapes and first aid.
Our homes should protect us, not pose threats to our well-being. By identifying and addressing these toxic and unsafe issues, we can transform our living spaces into truly safe havens.
Valerie M. Blake is a licensed Associate Broker in D.C., Maryland, and Virginia with RLAH @properties. Call or text her at 202-246-8602, email her via DCHomeQuest.com, or follow her on Facebook at TheRealst8ofAffairs.
Advice
I make more money than my partner and getting resentful
She’s taking advantage of a joint credit card

Hi Michael,
I make a fair amount more money than my girlfriend does and I’m happy to contribute more to our life (we are both in our 20s and living together).
But Meg doesn’t seem to care how much money she spends and then asks me to front her when she’s running low. She seldom pays me back.
Last week she had a big night on the town with her best friend (formerly her girlfriend) for the friend’s 30th birthday. She hired a limo and spent a lot on drinks and dinner. She put the entire night on our joint card which we are only supposed to use for shared household expenses, because she had maxed out her own card. Of course I will wind up paying for it. (And I am slightly jealous. Why am I paying for her evening out with her former GF?)
I pay for all sorts of stuff all the time because her credit card gets too big for her budget.
And somehow I almost never end up getting her share of the rent, which is already prorated according to our incomes.
She always tells me she’ll pay me back but her tab pretty much just keeps getting bigger.
If I bring this up with her, she tells me I am cheap because I make a lot and we’re a couple; and if she made more, she’d have no problem sharing everything with me.
Am I just being ungenerous? I don’t know. Sometimes I think she’s an ingrate, but then I think if you’re in love, you shouldn’t be thinking of money, just taking care of the person you love.
Also, although I make more than she does, I’m by no means rich. I have my own student loans, and paying for the bulk of our lifestyle stretches me thin some months.
Michael replies:
For starters: Most couples must contend with some version of your struggle with Meg, because most couples have some income disparity.
Do you maintain a lifestyle that both of you can afford? That works for some relationships where the lower earner may not want to feel indebted to the partner who makes more. Other couples work out a system where they pay for expenses in proportion to their income. And in some instances, the higher earner may have a “what’s mine is yours” philosophy and the lower earner is OK with that.
What matters is that both partners come to a mutual agreement and are comfortable with the arrangement. In other words, they collaborate.
That’s not the case with you and Meg. You sound resentful, angry, and feeling like Meg is taking advantage of you.
It’s great to be generous in your relationship, but it’s also important to have a boundary when you think it’s important to have a boundary. Yet you’re continuing to subsidize Meg even when you have trouble making your own ends meet.
Important question: Have you told Meg that you’re stretched thin some months? If not, I’d be curious as to how you’ve made that decision. If so, I’d be curious as to Meg’s response.
If you don’t want to keep serving as Meg’s piggy bank, what is stopping you?
There’s a great saying in psychotherapy: If it’s hysterical, it’s historical. Meaning, our “big” actions and reactions have their roots in our history.
Think about your life history: How does it make sense that you are acting like a powerless victim?
Is not having a boundary an old and familiar dynamic for you? Were there important players in your life—for example, your parents—who insisted it was their way or the highway? Or perhaps you learned as a kid that if you ever said “no” to your friends, there’d be negative consequences?
Now ask yourself what might be keeping you stuck in a relationship of resentment. Are you re-creating an old and familiar dynamic? Sometimes we keep putting ourselves in the same miserable situation, over and over again. What’s familiar can be comfortable, even if it’s miserable; and we may be trying to get some understanding of the dynamic and some power over it, to finally get it right.
I’m just speculating here, to encourage you to think for yourself why you are staying in the dynamic you describe. You haven’t mentioned anything positive about your relationship, or about Meg.
Another possibility: I wonder if you might be so fearful of being alone that you’re willing to tolerate all sorts of treatment in order to stay in your relationship. Or perhaps you don’t think you deserve to be treated any better than this.
Again, if this is the case, where might this belief be coming from? Understanding why we are stuck in behaviors that keep us miserable can help us to get unstuck.
You have an opportunity to do something different here: Set a boundary and take power over your life. Perhaps if you did so, Meg would surprise you by shifting her stance, which would be good news if you have some good reasons to stay. Or perhaps she would not. Your challenge now is to get some sense of what’s holding you back, if you want something different for yourself. And unless you act on your own behalf, you will stay in this position.
One more point to consider, regarding Meg’s dinner date with her ex: Whether or not anything is going on, I take your jealousy as a sign that you don’t trust Meg. And without trust, you can’t have a decent relationship.
Michael Radkowsky, Psy.D. is a licensed psychologist who works with couples and individuals in D.C. He can be found online at michaelradkowsky.com. All identifying information has been changed for reasons of confidentiality. Have a question? Send it to [email protected].
Real Estate
April showers bring May flowers in life — and in real estate
Third time’s the charm for buyer plagued with problems

Working in the real estate sector in D.C. can be as uniquely “D.C.” as the residents feel about their own city. On any given day, someone could be selling a home that their grandmother bought, passed on to the relatives, and the transfer of generational wealth continues. In that same transaction, the beginning steps of building of generational wealth could be taking place.
Across town, an international buyer could be looking for a condo with very specific characteristics that remind them of the way things are “back home.” Maybe they want to live in a building with a pool because they grew up by the sea. Maybe they want a large kitchen so they can cook grandma’s recipes. Maybe they will be on MSNBC once a month and need to have a home office fit for those Zoom sessions where they will be live on air, or recording their podcast. Perhaps they play the saxophone and want a building with thick walls so they can make a joyful noise without causing their neighbors to file a cease-and-desist order.
What I found fascinating was getting to know my buyers. Why were they purchasing their property? What did they want to do with it? Was this their grandmother’s dream that they would have a place of their own someday? Did they finally think they would write that award-winning play in the home office? What dreams were going to be fulfilled while taking part in this transaction?
Somedays, the muck and paperwork slog of navigating home inspection items and financing checklists could get to be distracting at best, and almost downright disheartening at worst.
One of my clients was under contract on THREE places before we finally closed on a home. One building was discovered to have financing issues, and the residents were not keeping up with their condo fees. Another building had an issue with the title to the unit, which meant the seller could not sell the home for at least another year until that legal snag was resolved. As the months rolled by, she was losing heart and feeling defeated. When we finally found the third home, everything seemed great – and then about two weeks before the settlement, the rains came down and the windows leaked into the bedrooms.
Another delay. (Our THIRD). This time, for several more weeks.
I think she wanted to pack a suitcase, go to the airport, get on a plane somewhere and never come back. What ultimately happened? The building repaired the windows, the seller’s insurance replaced the hardwood floors, and she bought her first condo, which she still enjoys to this day.
As Dolly Parton says, “If you want the rainbow, you’ve got to put up with a little rain.” And finally, after months of looking, waiting, and overcoming obstacles, the rainbow peeked out from behind the clouds.
Joseph Hudson is a referral agent with Metro Referrals. He can be reached at 703-587-0597 or [email protected].
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