Arts & Entertainment

Doggone funny read

Odes to the joys and frustrations of being a pet lover captured in new book

Published

14 years ago

November 3, 2011

‘I’m Not the Biggest Bitch in This Relationship’
edited by Wade Rouse
New American Library
$14
259 pages

Gays love their dogs. Perhaps in even greater numbers than our straight counterparts since we’re less likely to have children.

As you’ll see in the new book “I’m Not the Biggest Bitch in This Relationship,” a book of short stories edited by Wade Rouse, we’re not the only ones who love our dogs.

Without a doubt, your pooch is a member of your family. She sleeps with you. You share your food with him. You might even dress your dog in better duds than you have in your own closet. The relationship you have with Puppykins might be stronger than most of the ones you have with humans. Surely, you can’t be the only demented dog-lover in the world… can you?

Not by a long shot.

Let’s say you couldn’t ignore the dog that seemed to need you more than anything in the world — but the second you got her home, she turned into a tornado with fangs. If that describes your household, then flip to “Squatting with Stella by Starlight” by Allie Larkin. Think a minute, and you might realize that you need the pup more than vice versa.

Like many puppy parents, you might share a bed with the furkid. But whose bed is it, really? In “Ménage a Dog” by Alice Bradley, you’ll see that battling Buster for bed real estate is a common occurrence in lots of households.

Can’t tolerate a beggar? Might as well give up after reading “A Dog Day of Summer” by W. Bruce Cameron because, seriously, how long can you say no to those big, sad, hungry eyes? And how can you resist using babytalk? You can’t, so go ahead — read “Dum-Diddle-Dum-Dum” by Wade Rouse and “There’s No Place Like Home, Judy” by Alec Mapa and know you’re in good company.

Finally, if you ever truly wonder whether that pooping, shedding pile of fur really loves you, then stop and read “Wuzsha, Wuzsha, Wuzsha” by Eddie Sarfaty. And pass the tissues, please.

Are you daft over doggies? Crazy about canines? Moonstruck over mutts? Then you’re going to sit up and beg for this book.

Author and editor Wade Rouse pulled together about 20 authors (counting Chelsea Handler’s dog, Chunk, who wrote the foreword) and comedians to create a treasury that’s definitely funny but that also has its serious side. I howled, I whined, I yipped and I was glad I fetched this book.

If you’re a dog lover (and you must be, if you’ve read this far), you won’t be able to resist reading what’s in here. “I’m Not the Biggest Bitch in This Relationship” is a book to fall head over tail in love with.

Related Topics:I'm Not the Biggest Bitch in This Relationship Wade House

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FUND LGBTQ JOURNALISM

Photos

PHOTOS: Pride Reveal

‘Exist. Resist. Have the Audacity!’ announced as 2026 theme

Published

4 minutes ago

March 1, 2026

Michael Key

Pride Reveal was held at The Schuyler on Thursday. (Washington Blade photo by Michael Key)

The Capital Pride Alliance held the annual Pride Reveal event at The Schuyler at The Hamilton Hotel on Thursday, Feb. 26. The theme for this year’s Capital Pride was announced as: “Exist. Resist. Have the audacity!”

(Washington Blade photos by Michael Key)

Out & About

Plan your wedding the LGBTQ way

Washington D.C. LGBTQ+ Wedding Expo scheduled for Sunday

Published

2 days ago

February 27, 2026

Tinashe Chingarande

Rainbow Wedding Network will host a wedding expo on Sunday, March 1.

Rainbow Wedding Network will host “Washington D.C. LGBTQ+ Wedding Expo” on Sunday, March 1 at 12:30 p.m.

Guests can meet and mingle with a curated selection of LGBTQ-welcoming wedding professionals from across the region, each ready to help bring your vision to life, and spend a beautiful afternoon exploring everything they need to create a celebration that reflects them.

There will be a relaxed, self-guided look at the Watergate’s spaces and amenities, savor signature cocktails and delicious tasting samples, and connect with other couples who are on the same journey.

Visit Eventbrite to reserve a spot.

Calendar

Calendar: February 27-March 5

LGBTQ events in the days to come

Published

2 days ago

February 27, 2026

Tinashe Chingarande

Friday, February 27

Center Aging Monthly Luncheon With Yoga and Drag Bingo will be at 12 p.m. at the DC Center for the LGBT Community. Email Mac at [email protected] if you require ASL interpreter assistance, have any dietary restrictions, or questions about this event.

Go Gay DC will host “LGBTQ+ Community Happy Hour Meetup” at 7 p.m. at Freddie’s Beach Bar and Restaurant. This is a chance to relax, make new friends, and enjoy happy hour specials at this classic retro venue. Attendance is free and more details are available on Eventbrite.

Trans Discussion Group will be at 7 p.m. on Zoom. This group is intended to provide an emotionally and physically safe space for trans people and those who may be questioning their gender identity/expression to join together in community and learn from one another. For more details, email [email protected].

Saturday, February 28

Go Gay DC will host “LGBTQ+ Community Brunch” at 11 a.m. at Freddie’s Beach Bar & Restaurant. This fun weekly event brings the DMV area LGBTQ+ community, including allies, together for delicious food and conversation. Attendance is free and more details are available on Eventbrite.

The DC Center for the LGBT Community will host “Sunday Supper on Saturday” at 2 p.m. It’s more than just an event; it’s an opportunity to step away from the busyness of life and invest in something meaningful, and enjoy delicious food, genuine laughter, and conversations that spark connection and inspiration. For more details, visit the Center’s website.

Black Lesbian Support Group will be at 1 p.m. on Zoom. This is a peer-led support group devoted to the joys and challenges of being a Black lesbian. You do not need to be a member of the Beta Kappa Chapter or the Beta Phi Omega Sorority in order to join, but they do ask that you either identify as a lesbian or are questioning that aspect of your identity.Send an email to [email protected] to receive the zoom link.

Sunday, March 1

LGBTQ+ Community Coffee and Conversation will be at 12 p.m. at As You Are. This event is for people looking to make more friends and meaningful connections in the LGBTQ community. Attendance is free and more details are available on Eventbrite.

Monday, March 2

“Center Aging: Monday Coffee Klatch” will be at 10 a.m. on Zoom. This is a social hour for older LGBTQ+ adults. Guests are encouraged to bring a beverage of choice. For more information, contact Adam ([email protected]).

Tuesday, March 3

Universal Pride Meeting will be at 7 p.m. on Zoom. This group seeks to support, educate, empower, and create change for people with disabilities. For more details, email [email protected].

Wednesday, March 4

Job Club will be at 6 p.m. on Zoom upon request. This is a weekly job support program to help job entrants and seekers, including the long-term unemployed, improve self-confidence, motivation, resilience and productivity for effective job searches and networking — allowing participants to move away from being merely “applicants” toward being “candidates.” For more information, email [email protected] or visit www.thedccenter.org/careers.

Center Aging Women’s Social and Discussion Group will be at 6 p.m. on Zoom. This group is a place where older LGBTQ+ women can meet and socialize with one another. There will be discussion, activities, and a chance for guests to share what they want future events to include. For more information, email [email protected].

Thursday, March 5

The DC Center’s Fresh Produce Program will be held all day at the DC Center for the LGBT Community. People will be informed on Wednesday at 5 p.m. if they are picked to receive a produce box. No proof of residency or income is required. For more information, email [email protected] or call 202-682-2245.

Virtual Yoga Class will be at 7 p.m. on Zoom. This free weekly class is a combination of yoga, breathwork and meditation that allows LGBTQ+ community members to continue their healing journey with somatic and mindfulness practices. For more details, visit the DC Center’s website.