Arts & Entertainment
Savage views
Gay advice columnist has new MTV sex show

Dan Savage chats with a young gay University of Maryland student about his sex life in an early episode of ‘Savage U,’ a new MTV sex advice show. (Photo courtesy MTV)
The Blade caught up with Dan Savage last week — he’s plugging his new MTV show “Savage U” (Tuesdays at 11 p.m.) and took a few minutes out of a dizzying schedule of writing advice columns, editing newspapers, hosting the new show and being an anti-bullying advocate — in addition to being a family man — to riff on this and that.
BLADE: There’ve been so many cable sex advice shows over the years — the old MSNBC shows, Sue Johanson and even MTV’s own “Loveline” with Dr. Drew and Adam for those of us old enough to remember it. What can yours add that hasn’t been done before or does every generation need its own sex advice show?
SAVAGE: Hopefully what I bring to it is what I bring to “Savage Love” (his syndicated advice columnist which runs locally in City Paper) — a sex-positive, kink-positive take and one that embraces pleasure as a legitimate goal that celebrates people’s desire. A lot of what I’ve seen is really kind of sex negative that starts first with no, then with maybe. “Savage Love” works its way from maybe to yes to yes, definitely … there’s a school of thinking that says, “Oh my God, you can’t have sex if there’s any risk,” but there’s risk in all kinds of things. What needs to be discussed is how to mitigate the risk as much as possible but then at a certain point yes, you have a right to go for it. You also have to be able to shoulder the consequences. … There’s always a risk but you don’t hear people advocating against sky diving or snowboarding. There’s a whole bunch of people who will drop dead today from eating chicken salad and yeah, you’d be an idiot to leave it out in the sun for three days and then eat it, so we can apply that same brainy shit to sex.
BLADE: How do you get these college students to go on the air and say, “I have herpes” or “I’m a virgin.” Are you involved in finding them or do producers do that?
SAVAGE: There are producers who do that ahead of time. I need to be hearing about their stories for the first time when we film, so there are layers of producers who vet them ahead of time. There are a lot of old farts like me who think YouTube and Facebook and Twitter and all that is something new and always will be, but for somebody who’s 19 and basically grew up with this stuff, they have different attitudes about privacy … we’ve started some taping and then stopped ….
BLADE: Why? What would be an example of someone whose story shouldn’t be aired?
SAVAGE: This was someone who obviously had a deeper-seated medical issue that became evident on camera and we felt talking about the issue would have unfairly outed the person and would have been kind of dishonest so we unplugged the mics … we try to be honest and honor the kids without exploiting anyone.
BLADE: You seem so much nicer on the show than in your column where you often seem very exasperated and caustic. Why?
SAVAGE: Well I told someone in the premiere episode they were an idiot so I’m a little caustic here and there on the show but I think in the column, some of it is having to boil so much down to fit the space that it can make me seem more caustic and sarcastic than I am. I’ve had people say for the podcast I seem so much nicer but that’s the benefit of being able to run my mouth. It’s a different venue … also on the show, I’m a lot more willing to cut these kids some slack because they’re 18. I’m a lot more patient with an 18-year-old fuck up than I am with a 38-year-old fuck up. It’s like of course you’re fucked up when you’re 18 because 18 is fucked up anyway.
BLADE: Are you of the school of thought that a Santorum nomination would have been better for Obama than a Romney nomination or does any Santorum success cause you to shudder?
SAVAGE: I agree with Bill Maher on that — I don’t trust the American people enough to have (had) Santorum be the nominee. This is a country that elected Bush, at least once, he stole it the first time, but I would take Romney over Santorum though they’re two bars set so low they’re basically on the floor.
BLADE: What is the most pressing sex question you see from gay men?
SAVAGE: Male fear of intimacy is real and so it’s doubled with gay men. That comes up a lot. I also hear from young gay guys, like 15, 16, 17, 18 who say there’s no one for them to date. Their straight peers have been dating since the middle school dances but they’ve been alone or they say there are only older gay guys to date and I tell them dating starts later a lot of times for us so they don’t have a lot of options. Also monogamy comes up a lot. Gay guys are also guys so often it becomes an issue of non-monogamous relationships that are grounded in trust and disclosure rather than lying and cheating and running around.
BLADE: How do you have time to add a show to your busy schedule?
SAVAGE: Terry is a stay-at-home dad — that hetero-normative model of having a stay-at-home wife, that shit is awesome if you can afford it. We’re lucky in that regard.
The D.C. Front Runners held the 14th annual 5K Pride Run at Congressional Cemetery on Saturday, June 6.
(Washington Blade photos by Michael Key)























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Books
‘Mighty Real’ explores history of LGBTQ music
From Judas Priest to Whitney, something for every taste
‘Mighty Real: A History of LGBTQ Music, 1969-2000’
By Barry Walters
c.2026, Viking
$35/496 pages
Step, step, tap, back step.
Shimmy in a circle, left hand waving over your head, shake your tail feathers, repeat to the beat. Once there was a time when you could do any dance in your sleep, but it’s been a while. So read “Mighty Real” by Barry Walters, and see if your toes don’t tap.

Fifty-seven years after Stonewall, and here we are: LGBTQ musicians still face scrutiny for their sexuality because, says Walters, music isn’t created for gay listeners. No problem: LGBTQ artists and writers have often penned lyrics carefully in order to say what can’t be said, “coding” songs for gay audiences that straight (and ignorant) listeners can dance to and enjoy with apparent obliviousness.
Walters offers “just a few” examples.
Lou Reed sang about trans people in the late ‘60s and offered a rallying song for the Gay Liberation Front in 1972, the latter of which felt like a message to a then-11-year-old Walters. Janis Joplin claimed she was straight, but she had several girlfriends. Motown singers often offered sometimes-ambiguous lyrics.
John Lennon’s hand placement on the back cover of Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band made Walters begin to understand that he was different from other boys.
David Bowie is on his list, of course, as is Bette Midler, Elton John, Donna Summer, and Queen. You’ll find Judas Priest here, Green Day, and punk music. The Village People are included in this book, also Grace Jones, Duran Duran, and Cher, Whitney, Melissa, Latifah, and the lyrics from several blockbuster movies.
Two of Prince’s band members were lesbians, and they heavily influenced his albums. Diana Ross’s “I’m Coming Out” cemented her position in LGBTQ culture, and Michael Jackson’s inclusion here takes much careful consideration.
Read about Olivia Newton-John and the B52s. And then there’s Sylvester, for whom Walters has a soft spot in his heart. Sylvester’s death still makes Walters cry.
In his preface, author and music writer Barry Walters points out that music is what you make it and that it’s interpreted differently by each individual. To that end, this book naturally consists of preferential history and personal opinions about singers, bands, albums, and songs.
Agree or disagree. That’s where much of the appeal lies in “Mighty Real.”
Here, Walters wraps his memories around his choices, giving readers room for their own views, memories, and list making. Music-loving readers might also be surprised to note who’s not on Walters’ list – there aren’t many country performers here, for example, and the overall list focuses entirely on music from roughly 1968 to the year 2000, mostly on the kinds of songs you’ll want at the club or party. Again, discuss, and curate your own playlist.
This is a hefty book, but the chapters are browse-able and generally short enough to read in under five minutes. It’s nostalgic, yet also serious in the history it presents. This is the kind of book you want to leave near your album collection, or wherever you get your tunes. But finding “Mighty Real” is your first step.
The Blade may receive commissions from qualifying purchases made via this post.
The Gay Men’s Chorus of Washington performed “Soul Divas” at the Lincoln Theatre over the weekend. The show featured songs popularized by Tina Turner, Aretha Franklin, Diana Ross, Gladys Knight, Whitney Houston and more.
(Washington Blade photos by Michael Key)


















































