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Towns within a few hours’ drive of D.C. have major Pride events planned

From Shepardstown to Norfolk, festivities abound

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regional Pride events, gay news, Washington Blade

Baltimore Pride (Washington Blade file photo by Michael Key)

Not Prided out yet? Willing to hop in the car for a road trip? This weekend and the following have major Pride events planned in Shepherdstown, W.Va.,; Baltimore; Norfolk, Va.; and Frederick, Md.

W.Va.’s Panhandle Pride runs this weekend

regional Pride events, gay news, Washington Blade

Under new leadership, Panhandle Pride moves to downtown Shepherdstown. (Washington Blade photo by Michael Key)

MARTINSBURG — West Virginia’s Eastern Panhandle Pride is significantly different this year with new leadership and all new events.

Pride here started five years ago organized by the now-dormant Eastern Panhandle LGBTQ Alliance of West Virginia under the leadership of John Mason, a former minister. A Pride day was held in Morgan’s Grove Park in Shepherdstown, W.Va., a small college town about 73 miles from Washington, with live music, drag performances and a small festival. The Panhandle encompasses West Virginia’s Berkeley, Morgan and Jefferson counties.

At last year’s event, Mason said illness prevented him from continuing and asked for others to volunteer to take the reins. Over the winter, a new group formed and is offering four main events this year:

• Vendor Street Fair is Saturday, June 16 from 11 a.m.-4 p.m. featuring queer artisans, networking opportunities and live performances. DJ Jerrbear, a staple of Panhandle Pride who’s emceed all four previous years, will host. Luscious Purr, Michael Ratliff and Darrell Russ will perform.

• A Pride Float is planned for Saturday, June 16 from 2-6 p.m. Interested parties can meet at the Shepherdstown Library (100 E. German St.) at 2 p.m. with bathing suit in tow. River Riders will provide inner tubes and bus rides to and from the river. Cost is $36 per rider. Call 304-535-2663 to book a spot. The code is “Pride Float.”

• A Disco Party will be held Saturday night from 9 p.m.-1 a.m. at Domestic (117 E. German St., Shepherdstown). DJ Sidekick will spin. It’s free but a $5 donation is suggested.

• On Sunday, June 17, a Brunch & Art Exhibit will be held from 1-4 p.m. at the Town Run Tap House and Community Pub. Singer Chelsea McBee will perform. The Tap House will feature art from local LGBT youth.

Full details for all events is on Facebook — just search “Eastern Panhandle Pride 2018.”

Alex Orton and his partner Rod Snyder have helped organize the new group along with former state Del. Stephen Skinner (D-W.Va.) and Shepherdstown business owner Mark Harding, who leads the planning committee.

“We’re just a group of people here who really wanted to make sure this event continues in our area,” Orton says. “This is our first year bringing Pride into town and we want to make sure it’s a success.”

Flooding in the region prevented a drag show as has been held in previous years. Orton says they plan to have one later in the summer. A few hundred attended last year’s event. The decision was made to move from the park into town to increase LGBT visibility.

“We thought about bringing them to the brunch, but we didn’t want to do something half-way,” he says. “We want to take time to give that event the respect it deserves.”

DJ Jerrbear (aka Jarvis Jerry Leland Brooks) says he’s honored to continue emceeing.

“Eastern Panhandle Pride has always been one of my favorite events that I would headline and donate my time to each year,” he says. “I’ve seen what an impact showing love, sharing your talent or gifts at these events has over others because I know how it touches and blesses me.”

Mason says there’s no hard feelings.

“Our organization was very happy to turn over responsibility for Pride to the new Panhandle Pride organization,” he says. “We’ve offered them any help they need and we’re very happy with the job that they’ve done.”

Coming up in Shepherdstown, this year’s installment of the Contemporary American Theater Festival (July 6-29) features two plays with LGBT characters/themes — the unusually timely “The Cake” by Bekah Brunstetter and “Thirst” by C.A. Johnson. Details at catf.org.

— Joey DiGuglielmo

Hampton Roads Pride turns 30

Events near Norfolk, Va., kick off next week. (Photo via Hampton Roads Pride Facebook)

Hampton Roads Pride celebrates 30 years of Pride with a week’s worth of events on the theme “Stand Up Stand Out 30 Years Strong” starting Thursday, June 21. The organization’s first Pride event was organized by the social and political group, Our Own Community Press, who brought a June potluck picnic to the community in 1986. The tradition of a summertime festival began in 1988. 

Since then, the festival has expanded welcoming an estimated 30,000 guests to its celebration in 2017. It’s also the only Pride organization in the United States to host a Pride Boat Parade.

Hampton Roads Pride gets an early start with the Chrysler Kickoff at the Chrysler Museum of Art (1 Memorial Pl., Norfolk, Va.) on Thursday, June 21 from 6-9 p.m. Guests can pose with the LOVE sign outside and then go inside for a cash bar, food and live music by DJ Melody & Co., Ju Ju Drum and more. There will be a Make & Take table where attendees can create their own flags. The event is free for museum members and Hampton Roads Pride members. $5 for non-members.

Croc’s 19th Street Bistro (620 19th St. Virginia Beach, Va.) hosts a Pride Drag Brunch on Sunday, June 24 with showtimes at 11 a.m. and 2 p.m. The Pride pre-party will have a fundraiser, raffle prizes, food, drinks and more. 

Beach Beats and Brews is at Smartmouth Pilot House (313 32nd St., Virginia Beach, Va.) on Monday, June 25 from 6-9 p.m. Details on this event will be announced closer to the event date.

The Hampton Roads LGBT InterFaith Group hosts its sixth annual Interfaith Celebration at the New Life Metropolitan Community Church (1000 Sunset Dr., Norfolk, Va.) on Tuesday, June 26 at 7 p.m. The service is open to all faith communities, members of the LGBT community and allies. An ASL interpreter will be provided. 

Hampton Road Pride and Pride on the Peninsula present Pride 30, a reflection of the last 30 years of Pride in the Hampton Roads area, at the Virginia Air & Space Museum Library (600 Settlers Landing Rd., Hampton, Va.) on Wednesday, June 27 from 4-6 p.m. Keynote speaker Dr. Charles Ford will lead an open moderated discussion on Pride history. 

The fourth annual Pride Party on the Peninsula is at Carousel Park (602 Settlers Landing Rd., Hampton, Va.) on Wednesday, June 27 from 6-8 p.m. There will be free rides on the historic Hampton Carousel, free food and drinks. Later in the evening, attendees can board the Miss Hampton II for the second annual Drag Down the River Boat Cruise. 

Crafty Queen Weekend Wind-Up is at O’Connor Brewing Company (211 West 24th St., Norfolk, Va.) on Thursday, June 28 from 6-10 p.m. Details will be announced closer to the event. 

The seventh annual Pride Block Party is at Norfolk Scope Arena (201 East Brambleton Ave., Norfolk, Va.) on Friday, June 29 from 7 p.m.-midnight. Advance tickets are $12 before June 25 and tickets at the door are $15. 

The Pride Boat Parade kicks off PrideFest along the Town Point Park (113 Waterside Dr., Norfolk, Va.) waterfront on Saturday, June 30 at noon. Small and large boats will travel along the waterfront with themed decorations. The “Out on the Boat” party on the American Rover (333 Waterside Dr., Norfolk, Va.) follows the festivities. 

PrideFest is on Saturday, June 20 from noon-7 p.m. at Town Point Park (113 Waterside Dr., Norfolk, Va.). “Empire” star Jussie Smollett headlines the music festival. There will also be a performance from the Hampton Roads Pride Mass Choir, a local LGBT history and walking tour, family games, vendors and more. 

For more information on Hampton Roads Pride, visit hamptonroadspride.org. 

— Mariah Cooper

Baltimore Pride is this weekend

Baltimore Pride (Washington Blade photo by Chris Jennings)

Tonight Baltimore kicks off its 43rd annual Pride weekend. One of the oldest U.S. Prides, Baltimore Pride began in 1975 with a rally of about a dozen activists. It has since grown tremendously over the past four decades, with about 30,000 people at last year’s festivities, and organizers are expecting an even greater turn-out over the weekend. This year’s theme, “United We Shine,” is about celebrating similarities and differences and embracing community as a means of combating injustice. 

The weekend begins tonight with several pride festivities, including a fashion show (7-10 p.m., 2 N. Charles St.), drag show (8:30-10 p.m., 10 W. Franklin St.) and fetish party (9 p.m.-2 a.m., 2022 N. Charles St.) to name a few. And Saturday and Sundayare equally packed from start to finish. 

Saturday begins at 12:30 p.m. at 25 St. and N. Charles St. with a race in which men wear not-made-for-racing heels of at least two inches to mark the official beginning of Pride weekend. To participate, sign up at baltimorepride.org. 

The day continues from there with Saturday’s main event, the Pride Parade, with floats, musicians, civic leaders and more marching South on Charles St. from 33rd to 23rd. This year’s grand marshals are Shawnna Alexander, three-time winner of Best of Baltimore Drag Queen; and Davon Fleming, Baltimore native and semi-finalist on NBC’s reality singing competition “The Voice.” 

Saturday also marks the Pride Block Party (4 p.m., Charles St. and 22 St.), headlined by Miami Tip, Taylor Bennett and TT the Artist and featuring Grand Marshall Devon Fleming. Tailgating will also be available from 11 a.m.-8:30 p.m. at the Lez Lot (1915 N. Howard St.) with food trucks on site. Tickets are available at eventbrite.com for $20 and include two attendees; each additional person will be $5 (cash-only) at the door. 

Sunday marks the annual Pride Festival (noon-6 p.m., Druid Hill Park), an all-day celebration with music headlined by Tish Hyman — native Bronx rapper best known for her song “Dreams” featuring Ty Dolla $ign — a drag stage, exhibitors and local food trucks. 

Both Family Pride and Elder Pride will also take place beginning at noon on Sunday at Druid Hill Park, offering a chance to celebrate elders of the LGBT community and educate the next generation about its history. For a map with specific locations within the park for each event, visit baltimorepride.org. 

While official Baltimore Pride festivities run just this weekend, there are lots of unofficial parties and events throughout the rest of June in celebration of Pride month. For a comprehensive list of all events, visit facebook.com/baltimorelgbtqpride or baltimorepride.org.

— Grace Perry

Frederick Pride continues to grow in Maryland

Frederick Center, gay news, Washington Blade

Frederick Pride (Washington Blade photo by Michael Key)

Frederick Pride, now in its seventh year, is Saturday, June 23 from 11 a.m.-6 p.m. at Carroll Creek Linear Park in downtown Frederick, Md. 

Organizers are expecting up to 8,000 attendees and about 100 participating organizations. Admittance is free and families and allies are welcome. All attendees receive a Frederick Pride rainbow bracelet from welcome stations at each major park entry. 

There will be two entertainment areas featuring bands, drag shows, DJs, dancing and more at both the Carroll Street Amphitheater and the Market Street venue. The musical headliner is transgender country singer Brody Ray, who auditioned for both “American Idol” and “The Voice” as well as advanced to the celebrity judge auditions of “America’s Got Talent.” Chi Chi DeVayne, from season eight of “RuPaul’s Drag Race” (and season three “All Stars”) is the drag headliner. 

The keynote speaker is Rebecca King, a community storytelling advocate for the National Center for Transgender Equality. 

Organized group youth activities will be located near East Street. 

food court featuring beer and wine will be next to the amphitheater. Official Pride merchandise from the Frederick Center, the LGBT non-profit that organizes Frederick Pride, will be available. Proceeds will go toward supporting local LGBT community center programs. 

For more information, visit thefrederickcenter.org/Frederick-pride. 

— Abby Wargo

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Your guide to D.C.’s queer New Year’s Eve parties

Ring in 2026 with drag, leather, Champagne, and more

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Trade leans into a shark motif with its NYE plans. (Washington Blade photo by Michael Key)

With Christmas in the rear view mirror, we can turn our attention to ringing in a much-anticipated New Year with a slew of local LGBTQ parties. Here’s what’s on tap.

Pitchers

This spacious Adams Morgan bar is hosting the “Pitchers’ Perfect New Year’s Eve.”  There will be a midnight Champagne toast, the ball drop on the big screens, and no cover, all night long. The bar doesn’t close until 4 a.m., and the kitchen will be open late (though not until close). All five floors will be open for the party, and party favors are promised.

Trade

D.C.’s hottest bar/club combo is leaning into the Shark motif with its NYE party, “Feeding Frenzy.” The party is a “glitterati-infused Naughty-cal New Year’s Even in the Shark Tank, where the boats are churning and the sharks are circling.” Trade also boasts no cover charge, with doors opening at 5 p.m. and the aforementioned Shark Tank opening at 9 p.m.. Four DJs will be spread across the two spaces; midnight hostess is played by Vagenesis and the two sea sirens sensuously calling are Anathema and Justin Williams.

Number Nine

While Trade will have two DJs as part of one party, Number Nine will host two separate parties, one on each floor. The first floor is classic Number Nine, a more casual-style event with the countdown on TVs and a Champagne midnight toast. There will be no cover and doors open at 5 p.m. Upstairs will be hosted by Capital Sapphics for its second annual NYE gathering. Tickets (about $50) include a midnight Champagne toast, curated drink menu, sapphic DJ set by Rijak, and tarot readings by Yooji.

Crush

Crush will kick off NYE with a free drag bingo at 8 p.m. for the early birds. Post-bingo, there will be a cover for the rest of the evening, featuring two DJs. The cover ($20 limited pre-sale that includes line skip until 11 p.m.; $25 at the door after 9 p.m.) includes one free N/A or Crush, a Champagne toast, and party favors (“the legal kind”). More details on Eventbrite.

Bunker

This subterranean lair is hosting a NYE party entitled “Frosted & Fur: Aspen After Dark New Year’s Eve Celebration.” Arriety from Rupaul Season 15 is set to host, with International DJ Alex Lo. Doors open at 9 p.m. and close at 3 p.m.; there is a midnight Champagne toast. Cover is $25, plus an optional $99 all-you-can-drink package.

District Eagle

This leather-focused bar is hosting “Bulge” for its NYE party. Each District Eagle floor will have its own music and vibe. Doors run from 7 p.m.-3 a.m. and cover is $15. There will be a Champagne toast at midnight, as well as drink specials during the event.

Kiki, Shakiki

Kiki and its new sister bar program Shakiki (in the old Shakers space) will have the same type of party on New Year’s Eve. Both bars open their doors at 5 p.m. and stay open until closing time. Both will offer a Champagne toast at midnight. At Kiki, DJ Vodkatrina will play; at Shakiki, it’ll be DJ Alex Love. Kiki keeps the party going on New Year’s Day, opening at 2 p.m., to celebrate Kiki’s fourth anniversary. There will be a drag show at 6 p.m. and an early 2000s dance party 4-8 p.m.

Spark

This bar and its new menu of alcoholic and twin N/A drinks will host a NYE party with music by DJ Emerald Fox. Given this menu, there will be a complimentary toast at midnight, guests can choose either sparkling wine with or without alcohol. No cover, but Spark is also offering optional wristbands at the door for $35 open bar 11 p.m.-1 a.m. (mid-shelf liquor & all NA drinks). 

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Local, last-minute holiday gift ideas

Celebrate the season while supporting area businesses

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The DowntownDC Holiday Market is bustling. Union Station is decked out with its annual Christmas tree. Washingtonians have wrapped their houses and apartment balconies with festive lights and holiday decorations. The holiday season is here. And with stockings to fill and empty space under the tree, Washington’s local shops and artists have plenty to offer. 

Show your LGBTQ and D.C. pride with the Washington Blade’s annual holiday gift guide.


To embrace the holiday buzz: The Blanco Nwèl cocktail from Alchy Cocktails. This Caribbean eggnog is one of Alchy Cocktail’s seasonal holiday cocktails. The flavor profile is similar to coquito, a traditional Puerto Rican Christmas drink with a coconut base. As a queer and Caribbean-owned business, Alchy Cocktails has been based out of Washington since 2021. Blanco Nwèl is available in both cocktail ($24) and mocktail ($12) online and at a variety of holiday markets, including the Tingey Plaza Holiday Market, the Flea Market at Eastern Market, Union Station’s Main Hall Holiday Market, and more. ($24)


A spicy bite: Gordy’s Cajun Okra from Salt and Sundry. These spicy, tangy pickles pull on Southern Cajun-style flavors, packing a punch with paprika, cayenne, and more. Gordy’s is an LGBTQ-owned and Washington-based brand, making this gift an opportunity to support a local LGBTQ business straight from the jar. This pantry staple is available on Salt & Sundry’s website and at its locations in Union Market, Logan Circle, and its Georgetown holiday pop-up store. ($14)


To celebrate Washington pride: The DC Landmark Tote Bag from The Neighborgoods. Native Washingtonians, visitors, friends and family alike will find something to love about this Washington-themed tote bag. Food trucks, the 9:30 Club, the Metro logo and pandas from the National Zoo are just some of the city’s landmarks depicted across the tote in a red, white, and blue color palette. The tote is a part of the DC Landmarks collection, which donates 10 percent of its sales to the American Civil Liberties Union. The Neighborgoods itself is a local, woman-owned business built out of a passion for screen-printing in 2013. The 100 percent cotton canvas tote is for sale online or at the DowntownDC Holiday Market. ($22)


To give friends and family their flowers: The Flowers Bandana from All Very Goods. This 100 percent cotton bandana was designed in Washington and hand printed in India. Its uniqueness comes in being covered with the faces of Black women, representing a “love letter to all women but especially Black women,” according to All Very Goods. The Black woman-owned and operated business, based out of Northwest Washington, has a mission to celebrate diversity and representation through its products. The bandana intends to give Black women their “flowers.” The Flowers bandana is available for purchase online. ($24)


To unlock culinary creativity: The Curious Chef Gift Collection from Each Peach Market. This customizable collection of kitchen oddities — ranging from tinned fish to chili oil — is a quirky gift for the most inventive chefs. The collection is available in a Standard Santa, Extra Goodies and Super Holiday Size for up to $165. The Washington-based market, founded in 2013, permits customers to make the collection special by specifying what unique ingredients are packaged, including products made by local or LGBTQ brands. Each Peach Market offers assembly and pick up in-person at its Mount Pleasant shop and also offers local delivery and nationwide shipping via its website. ($85) 


To give a touch of sweetness: The DC Landmark Chocolate Covered Oreo Holiday Cookies from Capital Candy Jar. Wrapped in a festive red bow, this box of nine cookies embraces love for Washington and the holiday season in one. Among the dark and milk chocolate covered cookies are images of the U.S. Capitol, the White House, the Lincoln Memorial, the Jefferson Memorial and festive hollies. The treat, packaged in a Hill East facility just a few blocks from the Capitol, is available for purchase online and at the DowntownDC Holiday Market. ($23.95)


To celebrate queer gaming: Thirsty Sword Lesbians from Labyrinth Games & Puzzles. This roleplaying game embraces lesbian culture by unlocking a world of swords, romance, and battle. Ideal for group settings, the book presents a system of world building and character identities that are best brought to life by creative minds. Labyrinth, which has been a local Washington business for more than 15 years, celebrates non-digital fun through games and puzzles that connect the community. This gift is offered online and at Labyrinth’s Capitol Hill location. ($29.99)


To make a bold statement: The “Resist” T-shirt from Propper Topper. This locally screen-printed black tee features the Washington flag designed within a raised fist, symbolizing both Washington pride, and political resistance. The shirt is made exclusively by Propper Topper, a local Washington business that evolved from a hat shop to a gift store since opening in 1990. The tri-blend unisex shirt is available both for pickup at Propper Topper’s Cathedral Heights location and shipping via the online site. ($32)


To keep it c(g)lassy: The Glass Ball earrings from Blue Moon Aquarius. Gifting can rarely go wrong when it comes to a new pair of earrings. The unique statement earrings — made of polymer clay, glass, and 18k gold plating over surgical steel — are hand cut, sanded and assembled in Washington, meaning each set is unique. Blue Moon Aquarius, a local brand, is known for its small batch jewelry and home decor designed with clay materials. Available in oxblood, hunter green, lavender, and bluestone color palettes, these earrings are available for purchase on Blue Moon Aquarius’ website and at the DowntownDC Holiday Market. ($48)


To elevate a holiday tea or charcuterie party: The Honey Flight: Tea Lover’s Selection from BannerBee. This local honey company presents the ideal gift to make cozying up with a cup of tea slightly more special. The Honey Flight contains three types of raw wildflower honey infused with fair trade Ugandan vanilla bean, chai spices, and locally sourced lemon thyme herb. The gift is also an opportunity to uplift a family company based in the Mid-Atlantic that offers all-natural, sustainable products. The flight is available online, at the DowntownDC Holiday Market or at the Arlington Courthouse and Dupont Farmers’ Markets. ($36)


For Baltimore shoppers: If you’re in Charm City, don’t miss Balston Mercantile, opened by a gay couple in June. Their gorgeous shop in the Hampden neighborhood offers an array of unique, upscale finds, from barware and artwork to cookbooks and home decor and more. (849 W. 36th St.)

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Have yourself a merry John Waters Christmas

Annual holiday show returns to Alexandria and Baltimore

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John Waters performs his annual John Waters Christmas spoken word show on Dec. 20 in Alexandria at The Birchmere, and on Dec. 23 in Baltimore at SoundStage. (Blade file photo by Michael Key)

When it comes to iconic Christmas scenes in movies, none can top the tree-toppling tantrum thrown by cha-cha heels-deprived Dawn Davenport in John Waters’s fifth full-length feature “Female Trouble” from 1974. Therefore, it’s not surprising that Waters continues to make art out of Christmas, performing his spoken word Christmas tour in cities across the country. Waters has even more reason to celebrate with the release of his new red vinyl 7” single, a cover of Little Cindy’s “Happy Birthday Jesus (A Child’s Prayer)” on the A-side, and “A Pig Latin Visit From St. Nicholas” on the B-side. If you’re still looking for unique Christmas gifts, consider this record. As always, John was kind enough to make time for an interview in advance of his tour dates.

BLADE: John, in preparation for this interview with you, I went back and listened to Little Cindy’s original rendition of “Happy Birthday Jesus (A Child’s Prayer)” on your “A John Waters Christmas” CD.

JOHN WATERS: One thing I did, if you notice, I make the same stumble in my recording that she did in the original.

BLADE: It sounded to me like she got choked up.

WATERS: No, I think she just stumbles over a word, so I stumbled over the same word. It’s appropriation, insanely.

BLADE: Is this a song you first became aware of in your youth or when you were an adult?

WATERS: When I was doing the Christmas album, I had this friend named Larry Benicewicz. He was kind of my idea man with music. He knew every single old record. I would say to him, “Weird Christmas songs,” when we were doing a soundtrack, or a song about bears, or a song about this, and he would give me all these tapes. It was one of the ones he played for me. A lot of the songs I put in my movies and on my records, I did know as a kid. I did not know this one, but I immediately embraced it. I don’t think it’s campy. I think it really is spiritual in a weird way. My doing it makes it a novelty record. I am really for novelty records, and there aren’t any anymore. Why was there not a COVID novelty record? That’s insane. The dance “The Bug” that’s on the “Hairspray” soundtrack would be perfect for COVID. 

BLADE: The thing that struck me was that for a Christmas song in the voice of a child, a kind of death pall hangs over it, with lines like, “If I was good you’d let me live with you” and “they nailed you to the cross, they wanted you to die.”

WATERS: All of it! When I see children at midnight mass kneeling in front of a nude man nailed to a cross, I feel like I’m at The Eagle! It is S&M, it’s creepy. I took the same cover (photo) from her record to parody and put my face on it. The same thing I did with The Singing Dogs last year when I covered (their version of) “Jingle Bells.” I’m really into novelty records. I love them and I’m trying to bring them back. I don’t expect anybody to ever play these records. Even The Singing Dogs one said on it, “Please do not play this record” [laughs]. And the flipside, the Pig Latin version, is almost impossible to listen to.

BLADE: I’m so glad you mentioned that. “A Pig Latin Visit From St. Nicholas” reminded me of the lost art of speaking in Pig Latin. I also recall watching the PBS series “Zoom” as an adolescent and learning to speak “ubbi dubbi,” a distant relative of Pig Latin. Do you think that the time is right for a Pig Latin or ubbi dubbi revival?

WATERS: Here’s the thing, I never could pick up any language, except Pig Latin. I’ve been in every foreign country. Foreign countries have given me money to learn to speak the language. I can never do it! But Pig Latin…my parents and other parents in the ‘50s spoke Pig Latin so kids couldn’t understand what they were saying. Then my mother taught it to me, and I used it. The hardest take to shoot in “Pink Flamingos” was not eating the dog shit. It was when the cast skipped, in one take, saying “E-way, are-yay e-they ilthiest-fay eople-pay in-hay e-they ole-hay ide-way orld-way.” We’re the filthiest people in the whole wide world in Pig Latin. We had to do so many takes so they could do it once without screwing it up. In “Polyester,” Edith (Massey) answers the phone, “ello-hay.” I did a photo piece where it was all subtitled in Pig Latin. Like “osebud-Ray” (from “Citizen Kane”) or in “Streetcar,” “ella-Stay!” [Laughs] All the iconic dialogue translated into Pig Latin. My assistant who helped me do it, had never heard of Pig Latin. She really got good at it because she lived in many foreign countries and can pick up languages. But it’s not that easy to do it correctly and read it. Your computer will translate into Pig Latin.

BLADE: AI understands Pig Latin?

 WATERS: I guess that’s AI. It wasn’t 100% right, but it was close. I can speak it if I look at it, but just do a bit at a time. It was a challenge that no one would possibly care about or want to do.

BLADE: I think you pulled it off very well.

WATERS: If you want people to leave on Christmas morning, you put it on. That’s how you get your guests to leave. It’s time to go.

BLADE: Ood-gay i-bay! How did your relationship with record label Sub Pop, which released 2021, 2022, 2024, and new 2025 holiday singles, come about?

WATERS: I believe the first thing I did for them was “Prayer to Pasolini.” They came to me through Ian Brennan. He’s won a couple Grammys for World Music, but he is also is one of my agents who does the Christmas tour and a lot of my shows, anything with music. He helped me arrange each one of the songs. He had a relationship with Sub Pop. It was perfect. My friends in Baltimore, (the band) Beach House, have had huge success.

BLADE: That’s right, they’re on Sub Pop!

WATERS: Yes! I’m happy to be on it. I’ve even been to the warehouse and posed for pictures like Jackie Suzanne used to do.

BLADE: Is there any chance that “A John Waters Christmas” might be reissued on vinyl by Sub Pop?

WATERS: No. It’s such a nightmare to get the rights and to renew them. You have to find the publisher and the writer, and they usually hate each other. It doesn’t matter if it’s obscure or famous, it’s hard to get. You have to make the deal. The singer doesn’t get anything unless they play it on the radio. It would be so complicated legally, and there would be such a [laughs] tiny audience for it. I hope it will come out again. The same thing with the one for Valentine’s Day. I had two of them that did quite well when they came out; “A Date With John Waters and “A John Waters Christmas.” The “John Waters Christmas” album is still the soundtrack that plays whenever I’m doing my spoken word Christmas show as people are entering the theater.

BLADE: Aside from your annual Christmas show tour, what else do you do for the holidays now, and are there any traditions that you’ve carried over from your family?

WATERS: Certainly! I have two sisters, my brother’s widow, and me, so there are four and we take turns each year to have the Christmas dinner. Mine was last year. An entire sit-down dinner. Mom’s China, the silverware, the entire full dinner. It’s pretty traditional. I don’t have a Christmas tree, but I do decorate the electric chair from “Female Trouble.” That is a tradition in my family. We do have Christmas decorations, but they’re usually weird ones that fans sent me. I have one with Divine knocking over the Christmas tree, and the Christmas tree lights up, all sorts of amazing things. There is definitely a tradition here that might be a little altered, but it is definitely a tradition. I used to have a giant party every year, but COVID ended that. I still wouldn’t want 200 people in my house breathing right now.

BLADE: I was looking at your tour schedule and wondered if there are any new cities in which you’ve never performed the John Waters Christmas show that have been added to this year’s schedule?

WATERS: I don’t think there’s a city in America in which I haven’t done one show! The only places I haven’t been to are Hawaii and Alaska. I could do it there, but it’s too long on a tour. I can’t think of a city I haven’t played in in America over the last 50 years. The Christmas show is completely different every year. It doesn’t matter if you saw it last year.

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