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Queery: EJ Dean

The new D.C. Center HIV program assistant answers 20 gay questions

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Blade photo by Michael Key

The D.C. Center, the District’s LGBT community center, is expanding slightly.

EJ Dean, an AIDS activist originally from Empire, Mich., moved here three weeks ago to accept a part-time position as HIV program associate, a continuation of the work Dean was doing at the Kallen-Lorde Community Health Center in New York. The 31-year-old Dean, who’s gender non-conforming and identifies as queer, is also going to school full-time to finish a degree in human relations at Trinity Washington University. Dean got involved in in activist work as soon as it became possible.

“Being a queer person and since I have never been someone who dealt with inequity quietly, I’m not sure if I really stumbled into it or just started doing it as soon as I could. Then each time I found out about another opportunity where I’d be able to help, I’d move toward that. When I was younger, a lot of it was just making queer safe spaces and open mic nights and places where people could be themselves and know it was alright.”

Dean, who went to college in Pittsburgh and has also lived in Kalamazoo, Mich., and Montclair, N.J., enjoyed the last year in New York but never thought of it as home. The Center position appealed to Dean because of the opportunity it provides to educate.

“I’ll be building, growing and expanding the HIV programs,” Dean says. “Education is often the piece that gets left out and it’s the most important piece. People need to be able to access information and make change themselves. That’s what drew me to the Center. Making sure people have equal access to knowledge.”

Dean and partner Trina live in Adams Morgan and enjoy writing, music and cooking. Dean also enjoys making minimalist tables in reclaimed wood.

How long have you been out and who was the hardest person to tell?

I came out to my parents when I was 15. Let’s just say they did not throw me a party.

Who’s your gay hero?

I am currently learning everything I can about Larry Kramer, the founder of ACT UP.

What’s Washington’s best nightspot, past or present?

So far, my favorites are Busboys & Poets and Red Derby.

What’s your dream gay wedding?

A legally recognized celebration of our commitment to one another shared with everyone we love — currently unavailable in 45 states.

What non-gay issue are you most passionate about?

I am passionate about all people having equal access to health care, education, jobs and housing. But considering a high percentage of queer people are under-employed, uneducated, homeless or do not have access to queer friendly (if any) health care, I consider these gay issues.

What historical outcome would you change?

An emergency evacuation of New Orleans would have been systematically organized before Hurricane Katrina devastated the city.

What’s been the most memorable pop culture moment of your lifetime?

9-11

On what do you insist?

The truth.

What was your last Facebook post or Tweet?

“Checking out ‘Hide/Seek’ at the National Portrait Gallery.”

If your life were a book, what would the title be?

“Work in Progress”

If science discovered a way to change sexual orientation, what would you do?

Fight to the death to pass a law that would make the use of that discovery illegal.

What do you believe in beyond the physical world?

Liberation: a place where power and scarcity do not exist.

What’s your advice for LGBT movement leaders?

Share your power. Susan B Anthony said, “Organize agitate, educate, this must be our war cry.” Why do so many neglect to educate?

What would you walk across hot coals for?

Today: ENDA and an HIV Vaccine.

What gay stereotype annoys you most?

That gender identity somehow reveals sexuality.

What’s your favorite gay movie?

“Fingersmith”

What’s the most overrated social custom?

Gendered bathrooms

What trophy or prize do you most covet?

My tattoo of 1856, the bill number of One Kalamazoo Campaign non-discrimination ordinance I worked on and helped to pass in 2009.

What do you wish you’d known at 18?

Social constructs are imaginary.

Why Washington?

Trina and I find D.C. to be the place that we want to establish roots. The opportunity to be out and queer and make change happen exists for me here. I am honored to be doing so along side David Mariner and the many volunteers of the D.C. Center.

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Real Estate

Does Pride decor resemble Trump’s design aesthetic?

Glitter, gold, and rejecting the idea that a home should be understated

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Trump’s White House decor features an astonishing amount of tacky gold leaf. (White House photo public domain)

Interior design is often a balancing act between taste, personality, and restraint. Sometimes, however, restraint leaves the building entirely. Such is the case when the colorful exuberance of gay Pride-inspired decorating collides with the famously excessive decorating style associated with the current occupant of the White House. The result can be a fascinating study in maximalism, spectacle, and unapologetic visual overload.

Donald Trump’s personal decorating style has long been a subject of debate among designers and critics. Admirers see luxury and grandeur. Critics see something else: a dizzying display of gold leaf, marble, mirrors, crystal, and oversized furnishings that often crosses the line from elegant into what many designers would call tacky. More is rarely enough. If one chandelier sparkles, three are better. If a room has gold accents, why not make every available surface gold? (See Oval Office and ballroom rendition for details.)

In many ways, this excess shares common ground with certain Pride celebrations. Pride has never been about blending into the background. It celebrates visibility, self-expression, individuality, and joy. Rainbow colors, dramatic costumes, glitter, flamboyant artwork, and bold statements have long been part of Pride culture. Yet there is an important difference. Pride’s extravagance is often playful, self-aware, and rooted in personal expression, while Trump’s aesthetic has frequently been criticized for equating luxury with sheer quantity and visual intensity.

Combining these influences creates an interior that could best be described as “glamorous chaos.”

Imagine entering a living room in which gold-trimmed mirrors stretch from floor to ceiling. Crystal chandeliers hang above a bright rainbow velvet sectional. Marble floors gleam beneath metallic furniture that appears determined to reflect every available light source. Pride flags become framed artwork surrounded by ornate gold moldings. A room designed this way doesn’t whisper. It shouts.

Color is central to the concept. Pride-inspired interiors often embrace the full spectrum of colors. Trump’s style, meanwhile, traditionally favors cream, gold, black, and glossy finishes. Combining them means introducing vivid jewel tones against a backdrop of faux-palatial luxury. Emerald green chairs, ruby-red draperies, sapphire-blue accent walls, and gold-trimmed furniture can coexist in a way that feels deliberately theatrical.

The key word is theatrical.

Many professional designers spend years learning how to create visual balance. A Pride-meets-Trump interior intentionally ignores many of those rules. Pattern competes with pattern. Shine competes with shine. Artwork competes with furniture. The eye rarely gets a chance to rest. For some homeowners, that sounds exhausting. For others, it sounds like the perfect party.

Lighting offers another opportunity to embrace excess. Crystal chandeliers, mirrored lamps, illuminated shelves, and color-changing LED lighting can transform a room into something resembling a cross between a luxury hotel lobby and a Pride festival. The goal is not subtlety. The goal is spectacle.

A dining room inspired by this combination might feature a massive glass table, gold dining chairs, rainbow floral arrangements, mirrored walls, and enough crystal accessories to keep a polishing cloth busy year-round. Critics would call it gaudy. Fans would call it fabulous.

Artwork becomes particularly important. Pride-themed pieces featuring LGBTQ+ history, activism, and culture can provide meaning beneath the decorative excess. Without these personal and cultural elements, the room risks becoming little more than a collection of expensive looking, but not necessarily expensive, objects. Pride design can work best when it reflects identity and community rather than simply displaying color for color’s sake.

While normally a haven for restful sleep, bedrooms can take a similar approach. Plush velvet fabrics, oversized tufted headboards, metallic and mirrored finishes, colorful accent lighting, and dramatic artwork create a space that feels more like a boutique hotel suite than a traditional bedroom. Again, the challenge is avoiding the temptation to add one more decorative element to an already crowded visual landscape.

What makes this design combination interesting is that both aesthetics reject the idea that a home should be understated. Both embrace visibility. Both invite attention. Both encourage occupants to take up space unapologetically. Yet where Pride design often celebrates authenticity and self-expression, Trump’s decorating style is frequently criticized for prioritizing conspicuous luxury over cohesion and refinement.

The result is an interior style that many people would consider delightfully outrageous and others would consider a decorating nightmare. Either way, nobody is likely to forget it.

In the end, a Pride-inspired interpretation of Donald Trump’s famously over-the-top aesthetic would be colorful, glittering, excessive, and impossible to ignore. It would break nearly every rule of minimalist design while embracing the philosophy that if something is worth doing, it is worth overdoing. Whether one sees that as fabulous or tacky may depend entirely on how much gold leaf and rainbow velvet one can tolerate in a single room.


Valerie M. Blake is a licensed associate broker in D.C., Maryland, and Virginia with RLAH @properties. Call or text her at 202-246-8602, email her at [email protected] or follow her on Facebook at TheRealst8ofAffairs.

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Autos

Cool convertibles

Drop-tops to rev up the summer

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From left, the Mini Cooper and the Mazda MX-5 Miata.

Ragtops rock! For drivers looking to carve their own lane, the world already has enough sensible crossovers, minivans, and pickups. These three convertibles trade practicality for sunshine, wind, and the occasional wild-hair day. 

BMW Z4 

$58,000

MPG: 25 city/33 highway

0 to 60 mph: 5.2 seconds

Trunk space: 10.0 cu. ft. 

PROS: Strong engines. Uber comfy. Stylish. 

CONS: Expensive. Final year of production.  

Act fast, Bimmer fans, this is the last year the BMW Z4 roadster will be produced. Along with the entry-level xDrive30i and high-performing M40i, there is a Final Edition model.

Since 2002, the Z4 has expertly balanced performance, comfort, and style. The long hood and short rear deck still look fantastic. The stance is athletic. And with the top down, this car gains an extra dose of drama.

Under the hood, BMW offers turbo power that feels eager rather than overwhelming. Acceleration is brisk. The steering precise. The chassis composed. 

Upgrading to the premium models lets you scoot from 0 to 60 mph in just 3.9 seconds. But—ka-ching!—the MSRP soars to $79,000.

Available in manual or automatic transmissions, this convertible can sprint through mountain roads on Saturday and soothingly devour highway miles on Sunday.

As for the interior, it blends luxury and functionality. Materials feel expensive. Controls are easy to use. And the seats are supportive. 

For me, other ragtops may be more party hearty, but the Z4 is low-key, impeccably tailored and still the center of attention. Think suave James Bond versus sparkling RuPaul. 

MAZDA MX-5 MIATA

$32,000

MPG: 26 city/35 highway

0 to 60 mph: 5.5 seconds

Trunk space: 5.0 cu. ft. 

PROS: Nimble. Lightweight. Affordable. 

CONS: So-so power. Wind noise. Limited space

For decades, the Mazda MX-5 Miata has followed a simple formula: Keep it light, keep it balanced and make every drive feel special. The result: Automotive comfort food that never gets old.

Many vehicles grow larger every year, but the Miata has remained Lilliputian in a way that feels rebellious. You sit low. The controls are user-friendly. Visibility is excellent. 

No, the engine power won’t blow you away. But this beachcomber isn’t about brute force. It’s about how the Miata makes you feel wonderfully alive, whether tootling along city streets or a winding road. 

Inside, the dashboard is sparse but echoes a traditional sports car. Large analog tachometer and analog speedometer. And while the 8.8-inch infotainment display is dinky, it works nicely. 

Alas, storage is limited. The cabin is snug. And taller drivers may wish for a bit more room.

Yet somehow even those compromises feel almost charming. This ride knows exactly what it is and refuses to apologize. Sort of like showing up to Pride wearing what makes you happy rather than chasing trends.

MINI COOPER

$27,000

MPG: 28 city/39 highway

0 to 60 mph: 7.9 seconds

Trunk space: 5.2 cu. ft. 

PROS: Playful styling. Fun handling. Extra stowage. 

CONS: Ride can be firm. Not a speed demon.   

Mini Coopers approach life with a wink and a grin. Rounded headlights. Compact dimensions. Cheerful styling. It all works to create a vehicle that looks like it’s having fun before you’ve even started the engine.

Driving this ragtop is equally entertaining. The steering is quick, and the chassis feels eager to please. Overall performance is lively rather than blistering. 

The cabin leans heavily into Mini’s playful design language. Circular elements appear throughout. Details feel intentionally quirky. Many modern interiors seem created by committees that fear excitement. This cabin feels designed by someone who enjoys color, personality and perhaps spontaneous dance breaks.

Unlike the BMW Z4 and Mazda Miata, the Mini offers a small rear seat. “Small” is doing some heavy lifting there, but the extra space adds flexibility. It may not be enough room to comfortably squeeze in friends, but you can easily stow a few bags here.  

To me, driving this convertible feels like attending the world’s friendliest block party. People notice it. People smile. Sometimes people even wave.

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Real Estate

The advantages of owning your home

Looking beyond the financial perspective

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Renovating and customizing your home is just one advantage of homeownership. (Photo by Artazum LLC/Bigstock)

While one would hope it’s easy to calculate a break-even point for a home purchase – such as you could calculate for “how many widgets a month do I need to sell to break even?”  It’s not always easy when looking at the return on investment for a home purchase. Condo buildings can lose a view due to new construction next door. Weather patterns can expose deficiencies. Conversely, new dining and entertainment options in a neighborhood can cause home prices to skyrocket.  The addition of public transportation and employment options can make a neighborhood more desirable.  Or, as we have recently seen in the District of Columbia – an incoming presidential administration can severely affect the “vibe” of an entire city’s economy – for better or for worse.

Homeownership is not necessarily a get rich quick scheme.  Most homeowners find that staying in a house for at least 5-10 years – whether owner occupied or not, makes for a significant return on their investment.  An owner may not completely pay off a home in 10 years, but they might gain enough equity that they can receive quite a large check when they decide to sell or move.  And the old reasoning that “your apartment rental community does not cut you a sizeable check when moving out after 15 years.” still stands. Is homeownership for everyone?  Absolutely not. But many have reported other benefits besides purely financial gains. What are those benefits?

  • Feeling a sense of community.  – homeowners tend to take more pride in their buildings and neighborhoods, because they feel more invested and tend to want to protect their investment.  Neighborhood watch programs, getting to know elderly neighbors, forming building wide or cul-de-sac wide favorite TV show watch nights, super bowl parties, and other such communal and social ties lead to an overall sense of wellbeing and help to stabilize a nervous system in uncertain times.
  • Feng Shui?  Well, maybe there’s something to it. If you have been wanting to customize your own home but live in an apartment, there are many more restrictions on what you can do in a rental, than when you own your own home. Do you want new countertops?  Would you love to remove that popcorn ceiling?  Open up that kitchen?  Convert the back yard into a curated patio/cold plunge/hot tub time machine cookout/spring break adventure campsite of your wildest dreams? 
  • Forming longer lasting relationships  – sharing that CostCo membership with others on your floor, making a pan of lasagna and inviting the neighbors over for dinner, picking your neighbor’s brain for stock investment advice, asking your neighbor’s son to help you create a marketing plan for your new business, hosting the Friendsgiving you dreamed of – there are multitudes of reasons and ways that homeowners tend to feel a sense of community, sharing of resources, and realizing over time that “it takes a village.”  
  • Higher civic engagement – Studies have shown that homeowners tend to be more politically active in their districts, participate in local school boards, know the names of and how to contact their local representatives to affect change, etc.  Having a higher financial investment in and a commitment to stay in a neighborhood beyond just one or two years makes a big difference in who decides to show up at election time, especially for local elections. 

If you would like to know more about the research on homeownership, feel free to read the report from the National Association of Realtors here.


Joseph Hudson is a referral agent with RLAH. Reach him at 703-587-0597 or [email protected].

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