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Welcome to the jungle

Witty author shares retail experiences in new book

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Return to the Big Fancy, books, Washington Blade, gay news
Return to the Big Fancy, books, Washington Blade, gay news

(Courtesy Adams Media)

‘Return to The Big Fancy’
By Freeman Hall
Adams Media
$22.95
272 pages

The holidays are coming. That means you’ll need a little extra.

Extra time to go gift shopping, for sure, and extra closet space in which to hide packages. More importantly, you’ll need extra money for all that buying, which means you’re looking for an extra job.

There are a lot of openings at the mall, but be careful what you ask for. According to Freeman Hall in his new book “Return to The Big Fancy,” that part-time gig you’ll grab might just be extra irritation.

Freeman Hall figured he’d done his time at The Big Fancy, an upscale department store chain with a Burbank location. Hall worked the “Handbag Jungle,” where he dealt with nasty “custys,” greedy co-workers and a store manager he called Suzy Satan. He put up with them all while bringing home an insultingly small paycheck so when he got the chance, he escaped to pursue his dream of being a screenwriter.

But screenwriting didn’t pay the bills. Working at The Big Fancy did. Shortly after leaving, it was back to retail hell at Hall.

The new department manager of Handbag (never “purse”) Jungle was a wonderful woman Hall calls Maude and, since she knew about his past at The Big Fancy, she was happy to hire him. As a former handbag manager, Hall brought experience to the Jungle. He also brought back his best customers.

As for Hall, everything was familiar and depressing from the start.

Forbidden to use an elevator or mall entrance, employees were forced to climb several flights of stairs to get to work. Every day began with ear-splitting announcements and admonishments over the PA system from Suzy Satan to rally (or annoy) the troops. Since The Big Fancy paid its sales associates in commissions, “sharking” (stealing customers) was common and destroyed any sense of teamwork. Rules were loose (unless you broke them) and commissions could be retroactively withdrawn, even years later. The pressure on managers and associates was intense. Adding to it was that customers were always right — even when they weren’t — and discount rats always got their way.

It was frustrating. It was irritating. And it might’ve meant a completely horrible year for Hall, if it wasn’t for The Big Fancy christmas miracle.

So you plan on picking up some hours at the mall this fall. You might want to pick up “Return to The Big Fancy” first, while there’s still time to run.

Author Freeman Hill is both profound and profane in this book (although not as much of the latter as he was in his first book). His observations and his propensity for nickname-giving are both hilarious, but such snarkiness isn’t all you’ll find here: there are a few genuinely wonderful moments at the store and Hall shares them, too.

While retail-working readers will surely identify with this book, it will also give non-retailers a taste of what’s behind the counter. Either way, if you’re getting malled this holiday season, you’ll need a laugh and “Return to The Big Fancy” packs a lot of extras.

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Out & About

This queer comedy show will warm you up

Catfish Comedy to feature LGBTQ lineup

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(Promotional image via Eventbrite)

Catfish Comedy will host “2026 Queer Kickoff Show” on Thursday, Feb. 5 at A League of Her Own (2319 18th Street, N.W.). This show features D.C.’s funniest LGBTQ and femme comedians. The lineup features performers who regularly take the stage at top clubs like DC Improv and Comedy Loft, with comics who tour nationally.

Tickets are $17.85 and can be purchased on Eventbrite

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Arts & Entertainment

Catherine O’Hara, ‘Schitt’s Creek’ star and celebrated queer ally, dies at 71

Actress remembered for memorable comedic roles in ‘Beetlejuice’ and ‘Home Alone’

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(Photo courtesy of Pop TV)

Catherine O’Hara, the varied comedic actor known for memorable roles in “Beetlejuice,” “Schitt’s Creek,” and “Home Alone,” has died at 71 on Friday, according to multiple reports. No further details about her death were revealed.

O’Hara’s death comes as a shock to Hollywood, as the Emmy award-winning actor has been recently active, with roles in both “The Studio” and “The Last of Us.” For her work in those two shows, she received Emmy nominations for outstanding supporting actress in a comedy series and outstanding guest actress in a drama series.

In 2020, O’Hara won the Outstanding Lead Actress in a comedy series award for her work in the celebrated sixth and final season of “Schitt’s Creek.” She was also known as a queer ally and icon for her theatrical and often campy performances over multiple decades. In “Schitt’s Creek,” she played Moira Rose, the wig-loving mother of David Rose (played by series creator Dan Levy). David is pansexual, but the characters around him simply accept him for who he is; the show was embraced by the LGBTQ community with how naturally David’s sexuality was written and portrayed. That show ran from 2015 to 2020 and helped bring O’Hara and her co-stars into a new phase of their careers.

In a 2019 interview with the Gay Times, O’Hara explained why the show got LGBTQ representation right: “Daniel has created a world that he wants to live in, that I want to live in. It’s ridiculous that we live in a world where we don’t know how to respect each other and let each other be. It’s crazy. Other shows should follow suit and present the world and present humans as the best that we can be. It doesn’t mean you can’t laugh, that you can’t be funny in light ways and dark ways. It’s all still possible when you respect and love each other.”

Additional credits include “SCTV Network” (for which O’Hara won a writing Emmy), “Beetlejuice Beetlejuice,” “Curb Your Enthusiasm,” “Six Feet Under,” “Best in Show,” “Home Alone 2: Lost in New York,” and “Dick Tracy.” O’Hara also lent her voice to “The Nightmare Before Christmas,” “Chicken Little,” “Monster House,” and “Elemental.” O’Hara was expected to return for Season 2 of “The Studio,” which started filming earlier this month.

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Calendar

Calendar: January 30-February 5

LGBTQ events in the days to come

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Friday, January 30

Friday Tea Time will be at 12 p.m. at the DC Center for the LGBT Community. This is a social hour for older LGBTQ+ adults. Bring your beverage of choice. For more information, contact Mac ([email protected]).

Spark Social will host “RuPaul’s Drag Race S18 Watch Party” at 8 p.m. This event will be hosted by local drag queens TrevHER and Grey, who will provide hilarious commentary and make live predictions on who’s staying and who’s going home. Stick around after the show for a live drag performance. This event is free and more details are available on Eventbrite

Saturday, January 31

Go Gay DC will host “LGBTQ+ Community Brunch” at 11 a.m. at Freddie’s Beach Bar & Restaurant. This fun weekly event brings the DMV area LGBTQ+ community, including allies, together for delicious food and conversation.  Attendance is free and more details are available on Eventbrite.

Sunday, February 1

Go Gay DC will host “LGBTQ+ Community and Conversation” at noon at As You Are. This event is for those looking to make more friends and meaningful connections in the LGBTQ+ community. Look for the Go Gay DC sign on the long table near the front window. Attendance is free and more details are available on Eventbrite.

Monday, February 2

“Center Aging: Monday Coffee Klatch” will be at 10 a.m. on Zoom. This is a social hour for older LGBTQ+ adults. Guests are encouraged to bring a beverage of choice. For more information, contact Adam (adamheller@thedccenter.org).

Tuesday, February 3

Universal Pride Meeting will be at 7 p.m. on Zoom. This group seeks to support, educate, empower, and create change for people with disabilities. For more information, email [email protected]

Wednesday, February 4

Job Club will be at 6 p.m. on Zoom upon request. This is a weekly job support program to help job entrants and seekers, including the long-term unemployed, improve self-confidence, motivation, resilience and productivity for effective job searches and networking — allowing participants to move away from being merely “applicants” toward being “candidates.” For more information, email [email protected] or visit thedccenter.org/careers.

Center Aging Women’s Social and Discussion Group will be at 7 p.m. on Zoom. This group is a place where older LGBTQ+ women can meet and socialize with one another. There will be discussion, activities, and a chance for guests to share what they want future events to include. For more details, visit the DC Center’s website

Thursday, February 5

The DC Center’s Fresh Produce Program will be held all day at the DC Center for the LGBT Community. People will be informed on Wednesday at 5:00 pm if they are picked to receive a produce box. No proof of residency or income is required. For more information, email [email protected] or call 202-682-2245. 

Virtual Yoga Class will be at 7 p.m. on Zoom. This free weekly class is a combination of yoga, breath work and meditation that allows LGBTQ+ community members to continue their healing journey with somatic and mindfulness practices. For more details, visit the DC Center’s website.  

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