Living
Sights and smells of spring
Outdoor lovers will have no lack of great garden and flower events in the coming months
Now that spring is here, several celebrations and festivities are blooming up around the entire District. Here are a few selections for those who wish to celebrate the warmer weather and a new gardening season.
April
Brookside Gardens (1800 Glenallen Ave., Wheaton, Md.) holds its Earth Day Festival on Sunday starting at noon. The festivities will include a Green Craft and Vendor Fair, activities for children and families and a community art project. The vendors include local crafters selling items made of reused, recycled, organic and sustainable products. From 12:30-3:30 p.m., there are walks and tours of the gardens, which include an Aquatic Garden, Azalea Garden, Butterfly Garden, Childrenās Garden, Rose Garden, Japanese Style garden, Trial Garden, Rain Garden and a Woodland Walk. This event is free. For details, visit montgomeryparks.org/brookside.
The Book Hill neighborhood of Georgetown holds its 10th annual French Market today and Saturday at 10 a.m. About 35 Georgetown boutique and antique shops, restaurants and galleries participate in the event offering savings up to 75 percent. Strolling musicians, mimes, arts and crafts with Alliance Francais and live art demos by Art Soiree are included in the festivities. For more information, visit georgetowndc.com.
Ladew Gardens (3535 Jarrettsville Pike, Monkton, Md.) offers its own Earth Day celebration with āStorytime in the Gardens: Earth Day Birthdayā today at 10:30 a.m. and again at 12:30 p.m. Admission is $5-$10. Advance registration is required. To continue the festival, the garden hosts āCompost Crittersā on Saturday at 10:30 p.m. and invites families to search for critters in compost piles while learning about recycling. Attendees will be able to create their own mini composter. Admission is $2-$10 and advance registration is requested. Visit ladewgardens.com for more information.
Green Spring Gardens (4603 Green Spring Rd, Alexandria Va.) holds a āBasic Gardening: Easy Makeover Tipsā workshop on April 26 at 1:30 p.m. This class will help people who want to redo their gardens and landscapes. Cost is $10. For more information, visit fairfaxcounty.gov/parks/greenspring.
The U.S. Botanic Garden (100 Maryland Ave., SW) offers several different celebrations and tours for the spring season. Here are a few:
- The garden starts spring right with the Earth Day Festival today from 10 a.m. to 2 p.m. Cooking demonstrations with seasonal produce will be available and attendees can mingle with representatives of environmental groups. The celebration will take place on the Conservatory Terrace and this event is free.
- The Painting Orchids in Pencil and Watercolor workshop with artist Carol Beach is Saturday and Sunday at 9 a.m. The class will create a large painting of the anatomy of the orchid. Cost is $150-$175. For more information, visit usbg.gov.
- Enjoy jazz and blues at the ninth annual Big Band Jam with Harry Schnipper and the Blues Alley Jazz Society from April 23-26, starting at noon. This event is free and will take place in the National Garden Amphitheater.
- The garden hosts the tour āExploring Culinary and Medicinal African Plantsā on Thursday at noon. The tour explores the several different foods and crop grown in Africa, such as cocoa and other foods used for medicine or even sweet foods. This tour is free and will meet in the Conservatory Garden Court.
- The garden hosts the lecture āMedicinal Plants of Central Asia: Mountains, Deserts, the Silk Road and Soviet Astronautsā on April 26 at noon in the Conservatory classroom. Lecturer Sasha Eiserman, professor at Temple University, will talk about the history of the medicinal plants in this region. This event is free but pre-registration is required.
- Writer Melanie Choukas-Bradley, author ofĀ āCity of Trees,ā gives a workshop about identifying trees in the evening on April 26 at 6:30 p.m. and again the following morning at 10 a.m. Cost is $15-$20.
For more information about any of these events, visit usbg.gov.
May
The National Cathedral (3101 Wisconsin Ave., NW) holds its annual Flower Mart on May 3-4 at 10 a.m. The festival features annuals, perennials, landscape exhibits, Olmsted Woods and garden tours, musical entertainment, gourmet food, a book sale and activities for children. The festival also includes at least 50 booths with gardening items, handbags and jewelry. Floral designers and embassies will design beautiful floral arrangements. For more information, visit cathedral.org.
Ladew Gardens ( 3535 Jarrettsville Pike, Monkton, Md.) presents its Garden Festival on May 4 beginning at 8 a.m. with priority preview and lecture with Allan Armitage, a famous horticulturalist. This includes chances to shop first at the different venders and a continental breakfast. Tickets to these particular event costs $75-$100. At 10 a.m. general admission sales begins which includes admission to the festival as well as different tours. Admission to this is $15-$45. Visit ladewgardens.com for more information.
The Green Spring Garden (4603 Green Spring Rd, Alexandria Va.) hosts its Spring Garden Day on May 18 at 9 a.m. The even features 40 vendors of rare and unusual plants. For more information, visit fairfaxcounty.gov/parks/greenspring.
In the rapidly evolving world of real estate, two major trends are converging to shape the homes of the future: sustainability and smart home technology. As more people become aware of the environmental impact of their choices, and as technology continues to advance at a breakneck pace, these two trends are increasingly influencing buying decisions in the residential real estate market. For those looking to buy or sell a home, particularly within the LGBTQ community, understanding these trends is essential. At GayRealEstate.com, we recognize the importance of these developments and how they contribute to a better, more sustainable future for all.
Demand for Sustainable Living
Sustainability is no longer just a buzzword ā itās a key factor in the decision-making process for many homebuyers. The modern consumer is increasingly conscious of their carbon footprint and is seeking homes that align with their values. Sustainable homes, also known as green homes, are designed to be energy-efficient and environmentally friendly. They often feature solar panels, energy-efficient windows, and advanced insulation systems, all of which contribute to reducing the homeās overall energy consumption.
One of the primary benefits of sustainable homes is the long-term cost savings they offer. By utilizing renewable energy sources like solar power, homeowners can significantly reduce their utility bills. Additionally, many governments and municipalities offer tax incentives and rebates for homes that incorporate green technology, making the initial investment in sustainability more financially viable.
The Rise of Smart Home Technology
Simultaneously, smart home technology is becoming a must-have feature in modern homes. What was once considered a luxury is now becoming a standard expectation for many buyers. Smart homes are equipped with devices and systems that can be controlled remotely via smartphones, tablets, or voice-activated assistants like Amazon Alexa or Google Home. These technologies include smart thermostats, security systems, lighting, and even kitchen appliances, all designed to make life more convenient, efficient, and secure.
Smart home technology is particularly appealing for its ability to optimize energy use. For example, a smart thermostat can learn a homeownerās schedule and automatically adjust the temperature to reduce energy consumption when the house is empty. Similarly, smart lighting systems can be programmed to turn off when not in use or to dim based on the time of day or natural light levels, further contributing to energy savings.
Intersection of Sustainability, Smart Technology
The most forward-thinking homes are those that successfully integrate sustainability with smart home technology. This intersection is where the real innovation in real estate is happening. Homes that combine these elements offer not only reduced environmental impact but also enhanced living experiences.
Imagine a home where solar panels are not just installed but are also connected to a smart grid that optimizes energy use based on real-time data. Or consider a home with a rainwater collection system that works in tandem with smart irrigation to water the garden efficiently and sustainably. These are not just futuristic ideas ā they are already being implemented in new developments across the country.
In fact, this integration is becoming a key selling point in competitive real estate markets. Buyers are increasingly looking for homes that offer both energy efficiency and the convenience of modern technology. For sellers, this means that investing in these features can significantly increase the value of their property and make it more attractive to potential buyers.
Impact on Property Values
As sustainability and smart technology become more ingrained in the real estate market, their impact on property values is becoming increasingly evident. Homes equipped with these features are often valued higher than comparable properties without them. Buyers are willing to pay a premium for homes that offer lower energy bills, reduced environmental impact, and the latest in home technology.
For LGBTQ real estate buyers and sellers, particularly those who value innovation and environmental responsibility, these trends represent an exciting opportunity. By focusing on sustainability and smart home technology, you can find or create a home that not only meets your needs but also contributes to a better, greener future.
(At GayRealEstate.com, we are committed to helping our clients navigate these emerging trends. Whether you are looking to buy, sell, or simply explore the possibilities, our network of knowledgeable and LGBTQ-friendly real estate professionals is here to guide you every step of the way. Together, we can make sustainable, smart living a reality for everyone.)
Jeff Hammerberg is founding CEO of Hammerberg & Associates, Inc. Reach him at 303-378-5526 or [email protected].
Advice
My boyfriend has gained 50 pounds and wonāt change
Should I stay with someone who refuses to get off of the couch?
Dear Michael,Ā
My boyfriend of five years has been steadily putting on weight and now I would say he is about 50 pounds heavier than when we met, which was the summer of 2019.
First he blamed the weight gain on COVID. Like most people we were stuck at home, anxious, and overindulging in comfort food; and the gym wasnāt an option. So I didnāt say anything and figured things would return to ānormalā once we got through the pandemic.
I will say, though, that I managed to not gain much weight during that time because I found ways to exercise. He didnāt want to join me and I didnāt push.
Although weāre long past COVID, Tim hasnāt changed his ways. He never went back to the gym and continues to eat whatever he wants. Iād say his main hobby is sitting on the couch watching TV and eating junk food.
To make matters worse, his sister recently told me that historically Tim has been a heavy guy. Heād never bothered to share this with me, so I had no idea.
Evidently I met him on the tail-end of an intense push to get in shape. So he looked really good at the time, but that was temporary.
When I confronted him about this, he was mad at his sister for telling me and said I had no right to talk about him behind his back. Well, I didnāt ask herāshe just brought it up, and was surprised that I was surprised.
Tim is annoyed that I keep voicing my unhappiness about his being out of shape. He says he is the same sweet and loving person I fell in love with and Iām shallow to be so upset by surface appearances.
I told him he was trying to gaslight me: If he feels that love should have nothing to do with how you look, then why did he go to all the trouble to lose weight and get in shape before we met? I feel like he did it to get a boyfriend and then thought he could just go back to being fat once he was in a relationship.
So now heās mad at me for saying heās basically a devious schemer. I didnāt use those words but itās true I donāt trust him and feel taken advantage of.
Besides the weight, itās not attractive to see him just basically lie around all the time and not take care of his body.
I asked if heād consider some drug like Ozempic and he got really angry and said Iām awful to suggest something that might have all sorts of side effects just so that I will be happier with his looks.
The upshot is, I feel stuck with a guy who turns me off and doesnāt want to do anything about it and tells me Iām shallow for not being in love with him no matter what he looks like.
My friends tell me to dump him, but does he have a point?
Michael replies:
You get to decide whom you want to date. You are very far from alone in wanting an energetic and physically attractive partner.
Itās true that no one stays gorgeous, and has an amazing body, forever. We all have to accept the changes that time brings to our partners and to ourselves. But that is different from accepting a partner who isnāt making any effort to take care of himself.
Aside from the lack of self-care, Timās refusal to share significant details about his life, or his thoughts and motives around big issues, is both a trust-destroyer and a huge roadblock to your having a close or intimate relationship. And the way that Tim blows off your questions, and attacks you for being curious or confused, is a recipe for distance and resentment. It is also unkind.
Now letās look at your part in this. Iām curious about what has been keeping you in this relationship. You havenāt said anything about what you like (or love) about Tim. All I know is that he describes himself as sweet and loving.
Maybe he has some wonderful qualities you havenāt mentioned. Or maybe itās hard for you to stand up for yourself? To let someone down? To have a boundary when itās important?
My biggest questions: Do you have a history of picking partners who underperform in some major ways? Or is the first time youāve found yourself constantly disappointed by your partner, and constantly pushing him to do better?
Somehow youāve created a life where you are hitting your head against a brick wall, getting nowhere, continuing to do it, and complaining about the pain. Timās made clear that he doesnāt want to do anything different, and yet you continue to push him to change. Your behavior might be leading him to dig in. In any case, itās leaving you miserable.
In any relationship, you can certainly ask for what you would like from your partner. But you have to let go of the result. And if the answer is āno,ā you can either accept it, or drive the two of you crazy.
If you do care about this relationship, and Tim, and yourself, you could propose to Tim that the two of you meet with a couples therapist. Perhaps this would help Tim to open up and to get a grip on his behaviors. It might also help you to understand why you might be keeping yourself stuck in a miserable position, so that you can raise your level of functioning in this relationship.
One more important thought: Timās lack of self-care and energy make me think that he is depressed. I wonder if Timābefore you met him, at leastāwas one of the many gay men who feel intense pressure to have a certain kind of body. It isnāt always easy, or even possible, to sustain this kind of appearance. And I wonder if he may be ashamed of where he is, which might be one big reason for his defensiveness.
Again, couples therapyāor individual therapyāmight help him address whatever is keeping him down. But Tim would have to be willing to go. You can make the suggestion, but you cannot force him to change.
Michael Radkowsky, Psy.D. is a licensed psychologist who works with couples and individuals in D.C. He can be found online atĀ michaelradkowsky.com. All identifying information has been changed for reasons of confidentiality. Have a question? Send it toĀ [email protected].
Real Estate
Stylish solutions for furry friends
From a cozy dog bed to a chic cat tree, thereās a wide range of options
In today’s world, pets are more than just companions; they are family members. I know ā I have four dogs.
As pet owners increasingly seek to create comfortable and stylish living spaces for their furry friends, pet furniture has evolved from basic necessities to trendy, functional, and aesthetically pleasing pieces. Whether youāre looking for a cozy bed for your dog, a chic cat tree, or multifunctional furniture that blends seamlessly with your decor, the market offers a wide range of options.
Pet furniture isnāt just about luxury; it’s about improving your pet’s quality of life and making your home more functional. Traditional pet beds, scratching posts, and kennels have their place, but modern pet furniture goes beyond the basics to offer enhanced comfort and durability.
Well-designed pet furniture can provide several benefits.
Comfort and Support: Just like humans, pets need proper support for their joints and muscles. Orthopedic beds and ergonomic furniture pieces cater to the specific needs of aging pets or those with health issues.
Behavioral Benefits: Cats scratch, dogs chew, and pets generally need an outlet for their instincts. Specialized furniture, such as scratching posts, climbing trees, and chew-friendly materials, can reduce destructive behaviors.
Aesthetic Appeal: Gone are the days of unsightly pet beds and clunky kennels. Todayās pet furniture is designed to complement your interior decor, making it easy to integrate into your living space without compromising style. Many furniture pieces are customizable, allowing you to choose colors, materials, and even monogramming to match your personal taste.
Space-Saving Solutions: Multifunctional pet furniture, like beds that double as storage units or cat trees that also serve as bookshelves, are perfect for those living in smaller spaces. They help maximize space while providing for your petās needs.
Before diving into where to buy pet furniture, itās important to understand the different types available. Here are some popular options.
Pet Beds: From plush, cushioned beds to minimalist, elevated cots, pet beds come in a variety of styles. Some are designed for specific breeds or health conditions, such as orthopedic beds for older pets or heated beds for colder climates.
Cat Trees and Scratching Posts: Cat furniture is essential for felines who love to climb, scratch, and perch. Modern designs often feature multiple levels, cozy hideaways, and built-in scratching posts.
Pet Sofas and Chairs: These miniature versions of human furniture are perfect for pets who love to lounge. They often feature stylish upholstery and sturdy construction.
Pet Houses and Tents: Indoor pet houses and tents provide a safe and private space for pets to relax. They come in various materials, including wood, fabric, and even wicker, to match your decor.
Pet Stairs and Ramps: For older pets or those with mobility issues, stairs and ramps help them reach higher surfaces without strain. In fact, I just bought a set of foam steps so my aging dogs can still avail themselves of the family sofa. They also have a ramp to get to my deep mattress bed.
Multifunctional Furniture: These pieces serve dual purposes, like a coffee table that doubles as a pet bed or a bench with built-in pet storage. You can even hide food and water bowls in a pull out designed for the toe kick of your kitchen cabinets.
Chewy is a go-to destination for pet supplies, and they offer a wide range of pet furniture options. Whether youāre looking for a simple bed or a designer cat tree, Chewy has a variety of styles and price points. They also frequently offer discounts and free shipping on orders over a certain amount.
Known for its vast selection of home furnishings, Wayfair also offers a broad range of pet furniture options that are perfect for those looking to match their petās furniture with their home decor. Look for options from the PawHut brand.
If youāre looking for unique, handcrafted pet furniture, Etsy is the place to shop. Many independent sellers create custom pieces, such as personalized pet beds, handmade cat trees, and stylish pet houses.
Amazon offers an extensive range of pet furniture, from budget-friendly options to high-end, designer pieces. With fast and often free shipping, itās a convenient choice for pet owners looking to compare different products.
Petco and PetSmart are also popular pet stores that offer both in-store and online shopping. Their selections include functional and affordable options from well-known brands in the pet industry.
Whether youāre on a budget or looking for luxury pieces, your furry friend deserves the best, and with the right furniture, you can create a home thatās comfortable and beautiful for humans and pets alike.
Valerie M. Blake is a licensed Associate Broker in D.C., Maryland, and Virginia with RLAH Real Estate/@properties. Call or text her at 202-246-8602, email her via DCHomeQuest.com, or follow her on Facebook at TheRealst8ofAffairs.Ā
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