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‘The first lady is a beautiful person inside and out’

Makeup artist Carl Ray assists Michelle Obama with her public face

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Carl Ray, gay news, Washington Blade
Carl Ray, gay news, Washington Blade

‘Working with her is a great experience, the honor of a lifetime,’ says Carl Ray, who works as first lady Michelle Obama’s makeup artist. (Washington Blade photo by Michael Key)

As a child, he first began applying makeup to the visage of the most important woman in his life. An aptitude for art and affinity for beauty would eventually lead to doing the same for the first lady of the United States.

At age 14, now long prominent and locally pioneering D.C.-based makeup artist Carl Ray casually commented to his mother while she was seated at her vanity mirror, “I don’t think you’re doing that right.” His keen painterly instinct and developing eye for facial enhancement so impressed her that she insisted on his assistance each morning, even waking him up at times to work his magic. Recently divorced from his father, Ray wanted to get her out on dates and happily re-married. He succeeded.

A quick study at honing a fascination for fashion and the styles of the day, Ray was drawn to immersing himself in red-carpet looks and celebrity runway appearances through the pages of magazines.

An only child, born at Andrews Air Force Base in Prince Georges County, Navy brat Ray would spend his early years growing up in Italy, Morocco and Puerto Rico. He returned to the U.S. with his parents to attend junior high school in Virginia Beach.

Accustomed to living near water, the athletic Ray excelled as a high school swimmer, winning state and AAU competitions. Up early every morning to hit the pool, he was known for his breaststroke prowess and also as an avid and accomplished surfer. The popular athlete often hung out with the girls in his classes and dated cheerleaders.

“I did the whole girlfriend thing,” the 49-year-old Ray says, noting he had “never met a gay person and didn’t know what that meant. I just thought I was a weirdo for being attracted to men. But I knew it was something people disapproved of being.”

Also a member of the baseball team, Ray played first base and was a pitcher. “I still am,” he says with a hearty laugh. He came out to his friends shortly before graduation.

He would next earn an associate degree in business while studying commercial art. Ray discovered that painting helped him overcome dyslexia through concentration on activities focusing the right side of his brain. Impressionism was his early love, later developing a more abstract style on the canvas. A painter’s brushes and an artist’s color blending captivated his attention, later fueling a self-taught career.

“I became a fiend for art, painting and photography,” Ray says.

Moving to D.C. in 1991, Ray said the city reminded him of his youth in Europe. His childhood experiences drew him to “a lively city with an abundance of culture,” even if D.C. was more conservative in tone and texture. He soon landed a job at a trendsetting high-end cosmetics and luxury beauty product retailer on Connecticut Avenue near Dupont Circle. He quickly developed relationships with visiting brand representatives, who recognized his interest in makeup and skin care when introducing new products to staff.

“It was a very organic path to a career,” Ray says. “I established a niche for myself as the first resident makeup artist.” He assisted customers in selecting products and training them on how to use and apply them. “I understood that I had a talent and an ability to make women look and feel beautiful.”

Customers began requesting appointments with Ray, hoping he would help them determine what skin care regimens, makeup products and colors, and application techniques would work best for them. He had created his dream job.

“D.C. was playing catch-up in the field and the time was right,” he says. “The opportunity to evolve our services allowed me to pioneer an in-house position that existed in only a few cities then and is more available in D.C. now.”

Ray, who is single, describes himself as a “bridal guru.” He refers to weddings as the closest thing to a “runway event” in local lifestyles. As he developed a client roster, Ray welcomed a bride’s makeup request for a high-profile Georgetown wedding, a service that has since grown to become a specialty.

It was that wedding engagement as an on-site makeup artist that propelled Ray to seek an advance in his then-nascent career in 1999. With only a magazine tear sheet of the nuptial event coverage highlighting his bridal makeup artistry, he walked into the premier salon in D.C. hoping to interest management in bringing him on as their first makeup specialist. He was hired, both for his craft and his chutzpah, and has been the exclusive Artistic Talent at the George Salon at the Four Seasons Hotel ever since.

Recalling his early days at the salon being like “a fish out of water,” Ray would float through the space “bravely” offering to apply lipstick on salon patrons, providing suggestions regarding new shades and discussing additional products that might be of interest. “Clients would see me working or be recommended by others,” he remembers, but “I had to learn how to approach people.” It was a task that proved easily compatible with Ray’s affable manner and winsome personality.

As Ray’s client list expanded, he also garnered gigs for editorial features, magazine covers, film and studio work, fashion events, celebrity and political appearances, TV interviews, foreign dignitary visits, photography shoots and advertising campaigns. His work began appearing in Vogue, the Wall Street Journal, the New Yorker, Glamour, Allure, Elle, Ebony, Town & Country, Bride & Groom, Bride, Lady’s Home Journal and other publications, as well as on television network news and entertainment programs.

Ray’s fashion credits include makeup work seen on the catwalk for Donna Karan, Escada, Gucci, Carolina Herrera, Dolce & Gabbana, Yeollee, and the Vera Wang Fashion Show. His wedding credits include the Reem Acra Bridal Show, Oscar de la Renta Bridal, Monique Lhuillier Bridal, Rivini Bridal and Marchesa Bridal.

Ray has been honored as the top makeup artist for 15 consecutive years by Washingtonian magazine. Freelance work often has him traveling to New York, Los Angeles and other cities.

As accolades and achievements grew as numerous as the brushes in his black canvas Zuca makeup case, Ray received a call nearly six years ago that he remembers well. He was invited to the White House to prepare first lady Michelle Obama for a public appearance, the first of several “audition” opportunities that would lead to joining her personal staff as exclusive makeup artist.

“The first lady is a beautiful person inside and out,” Ray says. “She is a special woman who is very strong, very passionate. Working with her is a great experience, the honor of a lifetime. She is the most ‘real’ individual I have ever met.”

“I love the canvas, she has a beautiful face,” Ray says of “one of the most photographed women in the world, who also has a fashion style recognized around the world.” He notes that his favorite portfolio piece is Obama’s Vogue magazine cover photographed by Annie Liebovitz. His favorite moment was her recent visit with Queen Elizabeth at Buckingham Palace.

Describing Michelle Obama as “very much an easygoing person,” Ray praises her down-to-earth personality. “She is very sweet,” he notes, “and so damn funny and hilarious. I feel privileged to be so close to her, and appreciate her being a big supporter of me professionally and personally. She is a great mentor to me and the rest of the world.”

During the 2012 campaign, Ray admits to sometimes not knowing what city he was in due to an often-whirlwind schedule. Accompanying FLOTUS, he points out, “feels like being on television’s ‘The Amazing Race.’” He hastens to emphasize that “we never discuss politics and I am tight-lipped about talking about her and her family. I respect her and respect her privacy.”

Ray continues to see clients on a regular schedule at the George Salon, balanced with his White House duties and other work. He is proud to provide services to a full complement of Washington women, and a number of men, some famous and most not.

His intrinsic skills, success in trailblazing a new-to-Washington career, and achieving distinction in his field excite Ray about future opportunities to “continue to be a part of the progression of the industry,” he says.

Ray’s response to the frequent letters he receives from young people from across the country asking for advice about becoming a makeup artist is emblematic of his path so far. “Follow your heart and your passion,” he offers in reply, “and you may get to do what you love — like I have.”

Michelle Obama, gay news, Washington Blade

First lady Michelle Obama addressed the Democratic National Convention in 2012. (Washington Blade file photo by Michael Key)

For more information, visit Carl Ray’s website at CarlRayMakeupArtist.com or CarlRayMakeupArtist on Instagram.

 

Mark Lee is a long-time entrepreneur and community business advocate. Follow him on Twitter: @MarkLeeDC or reach him at [email protected].

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Local, last-minute holiday gift ideas

Celebrate the season while supporting area businesses

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The DowntownDC Holiday Market is bustling. Union Station is decked out with its annual Christmas tree. Washingtonians have wrapped their houses and apartment balconies with festive lights and holiday decorations. The holiday season is here. And with stockings to fill and empty space under the tree, Washington’s local shops and artists have plenty to offer. 

Show your LGBTQ and D.C. pride with the Washington Blade’s annual holiday gift guide.


To embrace the holiday buzz: The Blanco Nwèl cocktail from Alchy Cocktails. This Caribbean eggnog is one of Alchy Cocktail’s seasonal holiday cocktails. The flavor profile is similar to coquito, a traditional Puerto Rican Christmas drink with a coconut base. As a queer and Caribbean-owned business, Alchy Cocktails has been based out of Washington since 2021. Blanco Nwèl is available in both cocktail ($24) and mocktail ($12) online and at a variety of holiday markets, including the Tingey Plaza Holiday Market, the Flea Market at Eastern Market, Union Station’s Main Hall Holiday Market, and more. ($24)


A spicy bite: Gordy’s Cajun Okra from Salt and Sundry. These spicy, tangy pickles pull on Southern Cajun-style flavors, packing a punch with paprika, cayenne, and more. Gordy’s is an LGBTQ-owned and Washington-based brand, making this gift an opportunity to support a local LGBTQ business straight from the jar. This pantry staple is available on Salt & Sundry’s website and at its locations in Union Market, Logan Circle, and its Georgetown holiday pop-up store. ($14)


To celebrate Washington pride: The DC Landmark Tote Bag from The Neighborgoods. Native Washingtonians, visitors, friends and family alike will find something to love about this Washington-themed tote bag. Food trucks, the 9:30 Club, the Metro logo and pandas from the National Zoo are just some of the city’s landmarks depicted across the tote in a red, white, and blue color palette. The tote is a part of the DC Landmarks collection, which donates 10 percent of its sales to the American Civil Liberties Union. The Neighborgoods itself is a local, woman-owned business built out of a passion for screen-printing in 2013. The 100 percent cotton canvas tote is for sale online or at the DowntownDC Holiday Market. ($22)


To give friends and family their flowers: The Flowers Bandana from All Very Goods. This 100 percent cotton bandana was designed in Washington and hand printed in India. Its uniqueness comes in being covered with the faces of Black women, representing a “love letter to all women but especially Black women,” according to All Very Goods. The Black woman-owned and operated business, based out of Northwest Washington, has a mission to celebrate diversity and representation through its products. The bandana intends to give Black women their “flowers.” The Flowers bandana is available for purchase online. ($24)


To unlock culinary creativity: The Curious Chef Gift Collection from Each Peach Market. This customizable collection of kitchen oddities — ranging from tinned fish to chili oil — is a quirky gift for the most inventive chefs. The collection is available in a Standard Santa, Extra Goodies and Super Holiday Size for up to $165. The Washington-based market, founded in 2013, permits customers to make the collection special by specifying what unique ingredients are packaged, including products made by local or LGBTQ brands. Each Peach Market offers assembly and pick up in-person at its Mount Pleasant shop and also offers local delivery and nationwide shipping via its website. ($85) 


To give a touch of sweetness: The DC Landmark Chocolate Covered Oreo Holiday Cookies from Capital Candy Jar. Wrapped in a festive red bow, this box of nine cookies embraces love for Washington and the holiday season in one. Among the dark and milk chocolate covered cookies are images of the U.S. Capitol, the White House, the Lincoln Memorial, the Jefferson Memorial and festive hollies. The treat, packaged in a Hill East facility just a few blocks from the Capitol, is available for purchase online and at the DowntownDC Holiday Market. ($23.95)


To celebrate queer gaming: Thirsty Sword Lesbians from Labyrinth Games & Puzzles. This roleplaying game embraces lesbian culture by unlocking a world of swords, romance, and battle. Ideal for group settings, the book presents a system of world building and character identities that are best brought to life by creative minds. Labyrinth, which has been a local Washington business for more than 15 years, celebrates non-digital fun through games and puzzles that connect the community. This gift is offered online and at Labyrinth’s Capitol Hill location. ($29.99)


To make a bold statement: The “Resist” T-shirt from Propper Topper. This locally screen-printed black tee features the Washington flag designed within a raised fist, symbolizing both Washington pride, and political resistance. The shirt is made exclusively by Propper Topper, a local Washington business that evolved from a hat shop to a gift store since opening in 1990. The tri-blend unisex shirt is available both for pickup at Propper Topper’s Cathedral Heights location and shipping via the online site. ($32)


To keep it c(g)lassy: The Glass Ball earrings from Blue Moon Aquarius. Gifting can rarely go wrong when it comes to a new pair of earrings. The unique statement earrings — made of polymer clay, glass, and 18k gold plating over surgical steel — are hand cut, sanded and assembled in Washington, meaning each set is unique. Blue Moon Aquarius, a local brand, is known for its small batch jewelry and home decor designed with clay materials. Available in oxblood, hunter green, lavender, and bluestone color palettes, these earrings are available for purchase on Blue Moon Aquarius’ website and at the DowntownDC Holiday Market. ($48)


To elevate a holiday tea or charcuterie party: The Honey Flight: Tea Lover’s Selection from BannerBee. This local honey company presents the ideal gift to make cozying up with a cup of tea slightly more special. The Honey Flight contains three types of raw wildflower honey infused with fair trade Ugandan vanilla bean, chai spices, and locally sourced lemon thyme herb. The gift is also an opportunity to uplift a family company based in the Mid-Atlantic that offers all-natural, sustainable products. The flight is available online, at the DowntownDC Holiday Market or at the Arlington Courthouse and Dupont Farmers’ Markets. ($36)


For Baltimore shoppers: If you’re in Charm City, don’t miss Balston Mercantile, opened by a gay couple in June. Their gorgeous shop in the Hampden neighborhood offers an array of unique, upscale finds, from barware and artwork to cookbooks and home decor and more. (849 W. 36th St.)

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Have yourself a merry John Waters Christmas

Annual holiday show returns to Alexandria and Baltimore

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John Waters performs his annual John Waters Christmas spoken word show on Dec. 20 in Alexandria at The Birchmere, and on Dec. 23 in Baltimore at SoundStage. (Blade file photo by Michael Key)

When it comes to iconic Christmas scenes in movies, none can top the tree-toppling tantrum thrown by cha-cha heels-deprived Dawn Davenport in John Waters’s fifth full-length feature “Female Trouble” from 1974. Therefore, it’s not surprising that Waters continues to make art out of Christmas, performing his spoken word Christmas tour in cities across the country. Waters has even more reason to celebrate with the release of his new red vinyl 7” single, a cover of Little Cindy’s “Happy Birthday Jesus (A Child’s Prayer)” on the A-side, and “A Pig Latin Visit From St. Nicholas” on the B-side. If you’re still looking for unique Christmas gifts, consider this record. As always, John was kind enough to make time for an interview in advance of his tour dates.

BLADE: John, in preparation for this interview with you, I went back and listened to Little Cindy’s original rendition of “Happy Birthday Jesus (A Child’s Prayer)” on your “A John Waters Christmas” CD.

JOHN WATERS: One thing I did, if you notice, I make the same stumble in my recording that she did in the original.

BLADE: It sounded to me like she got choked up.

WATERS: No, I think she just stumbles over a word, so I stumbled over the same word. It’s appropriation, insanely.

BLADE: Is this a song you first became aware of in your youth or when you were an adult?

WATERS: When I was doing the Christmas album, I had this friend named Larry Benicewicz. He was kind of my idea man with music. He knew every single old record. I would say to him, “Weird Christmas songs,” when we were doing a soundtrack, or a song about bears, or a song about this, and he would give me all these tapes. It was one of the ones he played for me. A lot of the songs I put in my movies and on my records, I did know as a kid. I did not know this one, but I immediately embraced it. I don’t think it’s campy. I think it really is spiritual in a weird way. My doing it makes it a novelty record. I am really for novelty records, and there aren’t any anymore. Why was there not a COVID novelty record? That’s insane. The dance “The Bug” that’s on the “Hairspray” soundtrack would be perfect for COVID. 

BLADE: The thing that struck me was that for a Christmas song in the voice of a child, a kind of death pall hangs over it, with lines like, “If I was good you’d let me live with you” and “they nailed you to the cross, they wanted you to die.”

WATERS: All of it! When I see children at midnight mass kneeling in front of a nude man nailed to a cross, I feel like I’m at The Eagle! It is S&M, it’s creepy. I took the same cover (photo) from her record to parody and put my face on it. The same thing I did with The Singing Dogs last year when I covered (their version of) “Jingle Bells.” I’m really into novelty records. I love them and I’m trying to bring them back. I don’t expect anybody to ever play these records. Even The Singing Dogs one said on it, “Please do not play this record” [laughs]. And the flipside, the Pig Latin version, is almost impossible to listen to.

BLADE: I’m so glad you mentioned that. “A Pig Latin Visit From St. Nicholas” reminded me of the lost art of speaking in Pig Latin. I also recall watching the PBS series “Zoom” as an adolescent and learning to speak “ubbi dubbi,” a distant relative of Pig Latin. Do you think that the time is right for a Pig Latin or ubbi dubbi revival?

WATERS: Here’s the thing, I never could pick up any language, except Pig Latin. I’ve been in every foreign country. Foreign countries have given me money to learn to speak the language. I can never do it! But Pig Latin…my parents and other parents in the ‘50s spoke Pig Latin so kids couldn’t understand what they were saying. Then my mother taught it to me, and I used it. The hardest take to shoot in “Pink Flamingos” was not eating the dog shit. It was when the cast skipped, in one take, saying “E-way, are-yay e-they ilthiest-fay eople-pay in-hay e-they ole-hay ide-way orld-way.” We’re the filthiest people in the whole wide world in Pig Latin. We had to do so many takes so they could do it once without screwing it up. In “Polyester,” Edith (Massey) answers the phone, “ello-hay.” I did a photo piece where it was all subtitled in Pig Latin. Like “osebud-Ray” (from “Citizen Kane”) or in “Streetcar,” “ella-Stay!” [Laughs] All the iconic dialogue translated into Pig Latin. My assistant who helped me do it, had never heard of Pig Latin. She really got good at it because she lived in many foreign countries and can pick up languages. But it’s not that easy to do it correctly and read it. Your computer will translate into Pig Latin.

BLADE: AI understands Pig Latin?

 WATERS: I guess that’s AI. It wasn’t 100% right, but it was close. I can speak it if I look at it, but just do a bit at a time. It was a challenge that no one would possibly care about or want to do.

BLADE: I think you pulled it off very well.

WATERS: If you want people to leave on Christmas morning, you put it on. That’s how you get your guests to leave. It’s time to go.

BLADE: Ood-gay i-bay! How did your relationship with record label Sub Pop, which released 2021, 2022, 2024, and new 2025 holiday singles, come about?

WATERS: I believe the first thing I did for them was “Prayer to Pasolini.” They came to me through Ian Brennan. He’s won a couple Grammys for World Music, but he is also is one of my agents who does the Christmas tour and a lot of my shows, anything with music. He helped me arrange each one of the songs. He had a relationship with Sub Pop. It was perfect. My friends in Baltimore, (the band) Beach House, have had huge success.

BLADE: That’s right, they’re on Sub Pop!

WATERS: Yes! I’m happy to be on it. I’ve even been to the warehouse and posed for pictures like Jackie Suzanne used to do.

BLADE: Is there any chance that “A John Waters Christmas” might be reissued on vinyl by Sub Pop?

WATERS: No. It’s such a nightmare to get the rights and to renew them. You have to find the publisher and the writer, and they usually hate each other. It doesn’t matter if it’s obscure or famous, it’s hard to get. You have to make the deal. The singer doesn’t get anything unless they play it on the radio. It would be so complicated legally, and there would be such a [laughs] tiny audience for it. I hope it will come out again. The same thing with the one for Valentine’s Day. I had two of them that did quite well when they came out; “A Date With John Waters and “A John Waters Christmas.” The “John Waters Christmas” album is still the soundtrack that plays whenever I’m doing my spoken word Christmas show as people are entering the theater.

BLADE: Aside from your annual Christmas show tour, what else do you do for the holidays now, and are there any traditions that you’ve carried over from your family?

WATERS: Certainly! I have two sisters, my brother’s widow, and me, so there are four and we take turns each year to have the Christmas dinner. Mine was last year. An entire sit-down dinner. Mom’s China, the silverware, the entire full dinner. It’s pretty traditional. I don’t have a Christmas tree, but I do decorate the electric chair from “Female Trouble.” That is a tradition in my family. We do have Christmas decorations, but they’re usually weird ones that fans sent me. I have one with Divine knocking over the Christmas tree, and the Christmas tree lights up, all sorts of amazing things. There is definitely a tradition here that might be a little altered, but it is definitely a tradition. I used to have a giant party every year, but COVID ended that. I still wouldn’t want 200 people in my house breathing right now.

BLADE: I was looking at your tour schedule and wondered if there are any new cities in which you’ve never performed the John Waters Christmas show that have been added to this year’s schedule?

WATERS: I don’t think there’s a city in America in which I haven’t done one show! The only places I haven’t been to are Hawaii and Alaska. I could do it there, but it’s too long on a tour. I can’t think of a city I haven’t played in in America over the last 50 years. The Christmas show is completely different every year. It doesn’t matter if you saw it last year.

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Ultimate guide to queer gift giving

Champagne, candles, cologne, lawnmowers, and more

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Some gifts scream practical, others whisper luxury, and a few flat-out blur the lines. From cocoa that feels ceremonial to a cologne that linger like a suggestive smirk, this year’s ultimate gift picks prove that thoughtful (and occasionally naughty) presents don’t have to be prosaic. Welcome to your holiday cheat sheet for festive tangibles that get noticed, remembered, and maybe even result in a peck of gratitude planted under the mistletoe. Consensually, of course.


Amber Glass Champagne Flutes

Pop the champs – but make it vintage. These tulip-shaped stunners in amber-tinted glass bring all the Gatsby vibes without the Jazz-age drama. Whether you’re toasting a milestone or celebrating a Tuesday, their seven-ounce capacities and hand-wash-only care make ‘em as practical as they are pretty. Pair with a thoughtful bottle of bubs and gift with a glittering wink. $18, NantucketLooms.com


Disaster Playbook by Here Comes the Apocalypse

Because the end of the world shouldn’t be a solo act, this spiral-bound guide is your step-by-step roadmap to surviving and thriving when everything else goes sideways, which might be sooner than you think. Packed with checklists, drills, and a healthy dose of humor, it’s like a survival manual written by your most prepared (and slightly snarky) friend. Whether you’re prepping for a zombie apocalypse or, more realistically, REVOLUTION!, this playbook’s got your back. $40, HereComesTheApocalypse.com


Wickless Vulva Candles

Bold, luxurious, and completely flame-free, CTOAN’s wickless candles melt from beneath on a warmer, releasing subtle, sophisticated fragrances, like sandalwood or lavender. The vulva-shaped wax adds a playful, provocative element to any space –perfect for a bedroom, living room, or anywhere you want elegance with an edge. A gift that celebrates form, intimacy and self-expression, no fire required. $39, CTOANCO.com


Villeroy & Boch Royal Classic Christmas Collection

Every meal is a mini celebration – with whimsy at every place setting – in Villeroy & Boch’s Royal Classic festive dinnerware collection that hits all the right notes. Made from premium German porcelain, it features nostalgic little toys, nutcrackers, and rocking horses in delicate relief, giving your holiday spread a playful but refined twist. Dishwasher- and microwave-safe, it’s luxe without the fuss. Gift a piece to a special someone, or start a collection they’ll use (and show off) for years to come. $22-$363, Villeroy-Boch.com


Greenworks Electric Lawnmower

You a ’hood queen who considers lawn care performance art – or just wants to rule the cul-de-sac in quiet, emission-free glory? Greenworks’ zero-turn electric mower has the muscle of a 24-horsepower gas engine but none of the fumes, drama or maintenance. Six 60V batteries and a 42-inch deck mean you can mow up to two-and-a-half acres on a single charge – then plug in, recharge, and ride again. It’s whisper-quiet, slope-ready, and smooth enough to make you wonder why you ever pushed anything besides your queer agenda. The perfect gift for the homeowner who loves sustainability, symmetry, and showing off their freshly striped yard like that fresh fade you get on Fridays. $5,000, GreenworksTools.com


Molekule Air Purifier

For the friend who treats their space like a sanctuary (or just can’t stand sneezes), the Molekule Air Pro is magic in motion. Covering up to 1,000 square feet, it doesn’t just capture allergens, VOCs, and smoke – it destroys them, leaving your air feeling luxury-clean. FDA-cleared as a Class II medical device, it’s serious science disguised as modern design. Gift it to your city-dwelling, pet-loving, candle-burning friend who likes their living room as pristine as their Instagram feed. $1,015, Molekule.com


Cipriani Prosecco Gift Set

Effervescent with stone-fruit sweetness and a touch of Italian flair, the Cipriani Bellini & Prosecco gift set brings brunch-level glamour to any day of the week. The Bellini blends rich white-peach purée with sparkling wine, while the dry ’secco keeps things crisp and celebratory. Pop a bottle, pour a flute, and suddenly winter weeknights feel like a party – even with your pants off. $36, TotalWine.com


Woo(e)d Cologne

British GQ recently crowned Woo(e)d by ALTAIA the “Best Date Night Fragrance,” and honestly, they nailed it. Confident without being cocky – smoky gaïac and Atlas cedarwood grounds the room while supple leather and spicy cardamom do all the flirting – it’s a scent that lingers like good conversation and soft candlelight. Gift it to the one who always turns heads – or keep it for yourself and let them come to (and then on) you. $255, BeautyHabit.com


Lococo Cocoa Kit

Keep the run-of-the-mill mugs in the cabinet this Christmas and pull out Lococo’s handcrafted Oaxacan versions that demand you slow down and sip like it matters. Paired with a wooden scoop, rechargeable frother, and Lococo’s signature spice hot-chocolate blend (vegan, gluten-free, with adaptogenic mushrooms), this holiday kit turns Mexi-cocoa into a mini ritual you’ll look forward to. Perfect for anyone who loves a little indulgence with a side of ¡A huevo! energy.


Manta Sleep Mask

Total blackout, zero pressure on the eyes, and Bluetooth speakers built right into the straps, this ain’t your mama’s sleep mask — but it could be. The Manta SOUND sleep mask features C-shaped eye cups that block every hint of light while ultra-thin speakers deliver your favorite white noise, meditation, or late-night playlist straight to your ears. With 24-hour battery life, breathable fabric, and easy-to-adjust sound, it turns any bed (or airplane seat) into a five-star sleep suite. Perfect for anyone who treats shut-eye like an art form (or just wants to escape their roommate’s late-night bingin’ and/or bangin’). $159, MantaSleep.com


Shacklelock Necklace

Turn the industrial-chic vibe of a shackle into a sleek statement. Mi Tesoro’s platinum-plated stainless-steel necklace sits on an 18-inch wheat chain, featuring a shackle-style latch pendant that’s waterproof, tarnish-free, and totally fuss-les. Beyond style, it nods to a classic gesture in the queer leather community: replacing a traditional Master lock with something elegant to quietly signal belonging to someone special. Wear it solo for a minimalist edge or layer it like you mean it; either way this piece locks in both your look and your intentions. $90, MiTesoroJewelry.com


Parkside Flask Mojave Edition

Wine nights get a desert glow-up with Parkside’s limited-edition 750-milliliter all-in-one flask draped in sun-washed bronze and badland hues like sage, sand, and terracotta – with magnetic stemless tumblers that snap on for effortless shareability. It keeps your vino chilled for 24 hours, pours without drips (no tears for spilled rosé, please), and even lets you laser-engrave your own mantra or inside joke. Perfect for picnics, surprise rooftop clinks, or gifting to your favorite wine (or desert) rat. $149, HighCampFlasks.com


Mikey Rox is an award-winning journalist and LGBT lifestyle expert whose work has published in more than 100 outlets across the world. Connect with him on Instagram @mikeyroxtravels.

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