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Combatting scourge of LGBTQ youth homelessness in D.C.

There are many local resources available to help

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(Photo courtesy of the Mayor's Office of LGBTQ Affairs)

LGBTQ youth homelessness is a significant problem across the United States, but it is particularly acute in Washington, D.C. According to government statistics, a significant percentage of homeless youth in the country identify as LGBTQ. These vulnerable individuals face unique challenges due to their sexual orientation or gender identity, which often leads to estrangement from their families and communities.

In the lively, flashy streets of our hometown, Washington, D.C., and amid the city’s well-heeled new complexes like the D.C. Wharf in Southeast and City Centre Downtown, an alarming number of our youth find themselves without a place to call home, facing discrimination, abandonment, and societal neglect.

According to a 2022 article in DCist, “Queer and transgender youth are vastly overrepresented in the unhoused population. Nationally, 7% of people between the ages of 13 and 25 years old identify as LGBTQ+, while 40% of unhoused people of those same ages do. D.C.’s most recent Youth Count, which surveys the number of youth experiencing homelessness and housing instability, reports that the same is true in the District, with 40% of youth experiencing homelessness identifying as LGBTQ.”

Helping our youth may require more than just a simple annual or monthly donation. When you consider what you can do to help the District’s LGBTQ youth, you will want to do your homework to make sure the services you believe you are contributing to are reaching the youth in need. Below, you’ll find a few key elements to know to be informed and a few actions you can take to make a meaningful difference.

Discrimination isn’t the only cause of LGBTQ youth homelessness in our area. Several factors contribute to the high rates in Washington, D.C. One primary cause is family rejection, as many young individuals are forced out of their homes when they come out as LGBTQ.

Some families struggle to accept their child’s sexual identity or gender expression, leading to emotional or even sometimes physical abuse.

Discrimination in housing and employment also can play a significant role, making it difficult for LGBTQ youth to secure stable housing or find sustainable employment opportunities.

Additionally, the intersectionality of LGBTQ identities with race, ethnicity, and socioeconomic status may tend to exacerbate the issue.

LGBTQ youth from marginalized communities — African American and individuals of Latin American descent — are disproportionately affected by homelessness due to familial expectations and social stigma within ethnic or racial communities.

Homeless LGBTQ youth in Washington, D.C., confront numerous challenges that hinder their ability to thrive. These challenges include a lack of access to safe and affordable housing, limited educational opportunities, higher rates of substance abuse, mental health issues, and an increased risk of experiencing violence on the streets, or even exploitation.

Importance of support and resources

Addressing the scourge of homelessness for our youth requires a multi-faceted approach involving the government, community organizations, and individuals like you. The provision of safe and inclusive shelters is crucial, offering a supportive environment where young LGBTQ individuals can find refuge without fear of discrimination or harassment.

Moreover, comprehensive support systems must be established to address the unique needs of LGBTQ homeless youth. This includes mental health services, educational support, job training, and access to healthcare. Collaborative efforts between local organizations, policymakers, and the community can ensure that these individuals receive the care, resources, and opportunities they need to rebuild their lives.

Advocacy and policy changes

Advocacy plays a vital role in raising awareness and pushing for policy changes to combat LGBTQ youth homelessness in Washington, D.C. Organizations dedicated to LGBTQ rights and homelessness prevention actively work to promote inclusive policies, advocate for increased funding for support programs, and provide training to service providers to ensure they are equipped to address the specific needs of this vulnerable population.

LGBTQ youth homelessness in D.C. is an ongoing crisis that demands attention and action from individuals, organizations, and policymakers alike. Here are a few things you can do to help:

• Use Your Voice. Establish an ongoing voice in your ANC or your Ward on these matters. Reach out to your ANC commissioner if you feel your ANC can help. Start an ongoing conversation with the Constituent Services employees in your Ward member’s office and those offices of the At-Large Councilmembers. And reach out to the Mayor’s office when you have information that can help.

• Volunteer and Contribute. Volunteer your time and (when possible) financial support to organizations in the District that are making an on-the-ground difference. Volunteering can provide you a starting point to learn how the organization you seek to support operates and to see how efficient and effective they are internally at providing direct services to our youth.

• Know Your Partners. SMYAL does yeoman’s work working to establish healthy relationships with community organizations nationwide helping homeless LGBTQ+ youth. Learn about their work and see where supporting them makes sense for you. SMYAL does a lot to help housing providers exercise cultural competencies to address the needs of those homeless youth from our community. And SMYAL is just one group helping. Learn who your partners are.

So while significant progress has been made, there is still more work to be done to fully address the issue of LGBTQ youth homelessness in D.C. and nationwide. Ongoing advocacy, funding, and community involvement can be your leverage to help create sustainable solutions and ensure that all LGBTQ youth have access to safe housing, supportive services, and a chance to thrive in our great city.

Join CPM in contributing to local and national organizations focused specifically on LGBTQ+ youth homelessness such as the True Colors Foundation and SMYAL. Even the Salvation Army has a special program designed to reach our youth.

Resources and partners

True Colors Foundation. ”True Colors United,” founded by Cyndi Lauper and its executive director, Gregory Lewis focuses on addressing homelessness among LGBTQ youth. True Colors United works to raise awareness, provide resources, and support initiatives that aim to end homelessness among this population.

They collaborate with various stakeholders, including individuals, communities, government agencies, and service providers, to develop innovative solutions and implement policies that can effectively address the unique challenges faced by LGBTQ+ homeless youth. True Colors United also provides training and technical assistance to service providers, helping them create safe and inclusive environments for LGBTQ youth experiencing homelessness.

The Salvation Army. In the past, some LGBTQ activists and organizations have criticized the Salvation Army for discriminatory practices, specifically related to its treatment of LGBTQ individuals. Concerns have been raised about the organization’s position on same-sex relationships and its history of lobbying against LGBTQ rights.

It’s important to note that the Salvation Army is a decentralized organization, and its policies and practices may vary across different regions and locations. Some individual Salvation Army centers and programs may have taken steps to be more inclusive and supportive of LGBTQ individuals.

In recent years, the Salvation Army has made efforts to address concerns and improve its relationship with the LGBTQ community. They have stated that their services are available to all people, regardless of sexual orientation or gender identity.

SMYAL. SMYAL (Supporting and Mentoring Youth Advocates and Leaders) is an organization based in D.C. that focuses on supporting and empowering LGBTQ youth. While SMYAL primarily focuses on providing a range of services to LGBTQ youth, including support groups, counseling, leadership development, and advocacy, they also address LGBTQ youth homelessness.

SMYAL acknowledges that LGBTQ youth are disproportionately affected by homelessness due to various factors, including family rejection, discrimination, and lack of supportive resources. To address this issue, SMYAL offers specific programs and initiatives:

Housing Support: SMYAL provides assistance and support to LGBTQ youth who are experiencing homelessness or housing instability. They work with local partners to help youth find safe and affirming housing options, navigate the housing system, and access necessary resources.

Emergency Housing: SMYAL operates an emergency housing program known as the SMYAL House. This residential program provides temporary shelter and support services for LGBTQ youth experiencing homelessness. The program aims to create a safe and inclusive environment where youth can access resources, receive counseling, and work toward securing stable housing.

Outreach and Education: SMYAL engages in community outreach and education efforts to raise awareness about LGBTQ youth homelessness. They work to educate the public, service providers, and policymakers about the unique challenges faced by LGBTQ youth and advocate for policies and practices that ensure their safety and well-being.

Supportive Services: SMYAL offers a range of supportive services to LGBTQ youth, including case management, mental health counseling, employment assistance, and educational support. These services aim to address the underlying issues that contribute to youth homelessness and help young people build resilience and self-sufficiency.

Wanda Alston Foundation. The Wanda Alston Foundation is dedicated to ensuring that LGBTQ youth have access to services that improve their overall quality of life. Donations naturally continue their work to change the lives of LGBTQ homeless and at-risk youth for the better. Remote volunteer opportunities are available until we resume in-person volunteering. Current volunteer projects include: Social media management, website management, fundraising, policy review and development, and communications. Check out their website for ways to get involved.

Scott Bloom is senior property manager and owner, Columbia Property Management.

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Real Estate

The rise of virtual home tours

Adapting to changing consumer preferences in spring real estate

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Looking for a home? Virtual tours hold special benefits for queer buyers.

In today’s dynamic real estate market, the spring season brings not only blooming flowers but also a surge of activity as buyers and sellers alike prepare to make their moves. However, in recent years, there’s been a notable shift in how consumers prefer to explore potential homes: the rise of virtual tours. 

For the LGBTQ community, these virtual experiences offer more than just convenience; they provide accessibility, safety, and inclusivity in the home buying process. 

Gone are the days of spending weekends driving from one open house to another – unless that’s your thing of course, only to find that the property doesn’t quite match expectations. With virtual tours, you can explore every corner of a home from the comfort of your own space – find something interesting? Schedule a showing with any LGBTQ Realtor at GayRealEstate.com.

This is particularly significant for LGBTQ individuals, who may face unique challenges or concerns when attending in-person showings. Whether it’s the ability to discreetly view properties without fear of discrimination or the convenience of touring homes located in LGBTQ-friendly neighborhoods across the country, virtual tours offer a sense of empowerment and control in the home buying process.

Moreover, virtual tours cater to the diverse needs of the LGBTQ community. For couples or families with busy schedules or those living in different cities or states, these digital walkthroughs provide a convenient way to view properties together without the need for extensive travel. Additionally, for individuals who may be exploring their gender identity or transitioning, virtual tours offer a low-pressure environment to explore potential living spaces without the added stress of in-person interactions.

At GayRealEstate.com, we understand the importance of adapting to changing consumer preferences and leveraging technology to better serve our community. That’s why our agents offer an extensive selection of virtual tours for LGBTQ individuals and allies alike – visit our website, choose an agent and within minutes you’ll have access to the Multiple Listing Service (MLS) via their website.

From cozy condominiums in bustling urban centers to sprawling estates in picturesque suburbs, virtual tours showcase a wide range of properties tailored to diverse tastes and lifestyles.

In addition to virtual tours, GayRealEstate.com provides comprehensive resources and support to guide LGBTQ buyers and sellers through every step of the real estate journey. Our network of LGBTQ-friendly agents is committed to providing personalized service, advocacy, and representation to ensure that all individuals feel respected, valued, and empowered throughout the process. Plus, we are happy to provide a free relocation kit to any city in the USA or Canada if you are a home buyer.

As we embrace the spring season and all the opportunities it brings in the real estate market, let’s also celebrate the power of virtual tours to revolutionize the way we find and experience our future homes. Whether you’re searching for your first apartment, forever home, or investment property, GayRealEstate.com is here to help you navigate the exciting world of real estate with confidence, pride, and inclusivity.

Jeff Hammerberg is founding CEO of Hammerberg & Associates, Inc. Reach him at [email protected].

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Advice

Should I divorce my husband for the hot new guy in our building?

Debating whether to leave or stay after the sex goes cold

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Dear Michael,

I’ve been with my husband for 10 years and the sex is pretty much gone. It stopped being exciting a long time ago and pretty much the only time we ever do it is with the occasional third.

A really hot guy moved into our building about a year ago. We would see each other sometimes in the elevator or at our building’s gym and we started talking and really hit it off. Mark is 15 years younger than I but we seem to have a lot in common. We started hooking up and the sex is amazing.

I haven’t told my husband because it’s breaking our rule about no repeats. I have to say that the secrecy is hot. It’s kind of a thrill to take the elevator upstairs when I say I’m going on an errand. But it’s more than that. I have a connection with Mark that is far more amazing than what I have ever felt with my husband. Not just the sex. We just enjoy being together, talking about anything and everything.

My husband went to visit his family last weekend and I spent the whole time with Mark. Since then I can’t stop thinking that I want to leave my husband and be with Mark.

Part of me thinks this is a crazy mid-life crisis. I mean, this kid’s in a totally different place in life. But we have mind-blowing sex and a fantastic connection. I’d like your thoughts on how to proceed.

Michael replies: 

You’ve got a lot to consider.

First: Sex with a long-term partner changes over time. It tends to be less about erotic heat and more about the connection with a person whom you love. In other words, it’s being with the person you’re with that makes the sex meaningful and even great. Having a good sexual relationship with a long-term partner comes far more from a heart connection than from a crotch attachment.  

Second: You seem ready to throw your relationship under the bus pretty quickly, without addressing other problems in the relationship besides sex. When you are sneaking around, lying, and rule-breaking , I don’t see how you can look your husband in the eye; and if you can’t look him in the eye, you certainly can’t have even a half-way decent relationship.

Yet another point to consider: Affairs pretty much always seem more exciting than marriage. The partner is new, which almost automatically makes the sex hotter; the secrecy is a thrill; and you don’t have to deal with paying the rent, house chores, and all the petty annoyances of living up-close with someone day-in, day-out.  

You are bringing lots of energy to your affair, and everything about it is exciting. You are bringing no energy — at least no positive energy — to your marriage. You get what you put into a relationship.

Divorce is not something that should be entered into lightly. Be aware that if you leave your husband for Mark, you will no doubt find over time that the sex becomes less exciting and that the connection is not always fantastic. No surprise, 75 percent of marriages that begin with affair partners end in divorce. While I don’t think statistics predict what will happen to any particular couple, believing that you will have a significantly better relationship with your affair partner than you did with your husband sets you up for likely disappointment.

Many gay men focus on “hot sex” as the big draw, pursuing a lot of sex with a lot of men, and/or pursuing an ongoing series of relationships that last until the sex cools. If that’s what you want, that’s fine. But it’s a different path from pursuing a close and loving long-term relationship, which involves knowing someone well and having him know you well; collaborating on getting through the hard stuff life throws at us; finding ways to make peace with disappointment; and consistently striving to be someone worth being married to. 

How to proceed? While you are the only person who should make that decision, I would suggest that whatever your choice, keep in mind that marriage can be more than what you’ve made of it, so far.

Michael Radkowsky, Psy.D. is a licensed psychologist who works with couples and individuals in D.C. He can be found online at michaelradkowsky.com. All identifying information has been changed for reasons of confidentiality. Have a question? Send it to [email protected].

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Autos

Sport haulers: Jeep Grand Cherokee, Mercedes GLE-Class

Updated cabins, adept handling, and more

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Jeep Grand Cherokee

Now that March Madness and the Masters are over, it’s time for, well, everything else. For my husband and me, this means water sports, as in kayaks and rowing sculls, which is why we trekked to the Potomac for the George Washington Invitational regatta last weekend. 

Alas, high winds splashed cold water on the event, canceling much of it. But there was still plenty of spirited camaraderie to rival “The Boys in the Boat.” 

And I was reminded of my time years ago as a rower with D.C. Strokes, ferrying teammates to races up and down the East Coast. Back then my ride was a dated, rather cramped four-door sedan. 

If only we could have paddled around in a sporty SUV like the two reviewed here. Now that would have been some smooth sailing (wink-wink). 

JEEP GRAND CHEROKEE 

$40,000

MPG: 19 city/26 highway

0 to 60 mph: 7.5 seconds

Maximum cargo room: 37.7 cu. ft. 

PROS: Updated cabin, adept handling, strong towing 

CONS: So-so gas mileage, no third row, pricey trim levels

IN A NUTSHELL: Rough, tough and buff. It’s doesn’t get much more butch than a Jeep. This year’s Grand Cherokee is no exception, with rugged looks, expert off-road capability and better-than-average towing capacity of 6,200 pounds. 

There are a dizzying number of trim levels—more than a dozen—starting with the barebones base-model Laredo at an affordable $40,000. The lineup tops out with the Summit Reserve 4xe PHEV, which is almost twice the price at $76,000 and one of various plug-in hybrid versions available. Those plug-in hybrids can drive up to 25 miles on all-electric power before the four-cylinder gas engine kicks in. Otherwise, you can choose from a standard V6 or V8. Gas mileage on all trim levels is basically the same as the competition. 

Where the Grand Cherokee really shines is in the handling. More refined than a Wrangler but less lavish than a Land Rover, this Jeep maneuvers just as well on city streets and highways as it does on bumpier terrain.    

I tested the mid-range and mid-priced Overland, which comes standard with four-wheel drive and large 20-inch wheels. It also boasts a slew of niceties, such as quilted upholstery, panoramic sunroof and high-tech digital displays. These include a 10.25-inch infotainment touchscreen and rear-seat entertainment system. 

The nine-speaker Alpine stereo, designed specifically for the Grand Cherokee, is pleasing. But I really wanted to hear the boffo 19-speaker McIntosh surround-sound system that Jeep also offers. Sigh, it’s only available on the premium Summit trim level. 

MERCEDES GLE-CLASS

$64,000 

MPG: 20 city/25 highway

0 to 60 mph: 6.6 seconds

Maximum cargo room: 33.3 cu. ft. 

PROS: Lush interior, silky-smooth suspension, speedy 

CONS: Some confusing electronics, tight third row, many competitors

IN A NUTSHELL: For a more high-class hauler, there’s the Mercedes GLE-Class. This midsize SUV is similar in size to the Jeep Grand Cherokee. But instead of seating five passengers, the GLE can carry up to seven. Sure, legroom in the optional third row may be tight for taller travelers, but it’s perfect for a cocky cockswain or two. 

Six trim levels, ranging from the base-model GLE 350 to two high-performance AMG models. For eco-conscious buyers, the GLE 450e plug-in hybrid arrived earlier this year and can run on battery power alone for almost 60 miles. 

My test car was the top-of-the-line AMG 63 S 4Matic, a head-turner in every way. Priced at a whopping $127,000, this GLE looks best in glossy black with the Night Package, which includes tasteful jet-black exterior accents and matte-black wheels. To complete the Darth Vader effect, there’s a deep, menacing exhaust rumble that’s downright threatening.

You expect such a ride to be wicked fast, and it is: 0 to 60 mph in a blistering 3.7 seconds. Yet the carbon ceramic brakes with their devil-red calipers are equally impressive in slowing things down quickly. 

Inside, each GLE comes with two large digital displays on the elegantly sculpted dashboard. My favorite feature is the “Hey Mercedes” digital assistant, which responds to voice commands such as opening or closing the sunroof, operating the infotainment system or activating the climate controls. 

It’s hard to find sport seats that are more comfortable, especially with the heavenly massage function (though those massage controls could be a bit more user-friendly.) For AMG models, the seats come with red-contrasting stitching and red seatbelts—a nod to the devilish demeanor under the hood.

Considering all the SUVs available in showrooms, few make quite the splash of a GLE.

Mercedes GLE-Class
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