a&e features
Meet D.C.’s most eligible LGBTQ singles
Find a date just in time for Valentine’s Day
Valentine’s Day is approaching and if you’re single, there’s still time to find a date. Each year, the Blade highlights D.C.’s Most Eligible Singles with help from our readers. Here is this year’s list.
Antoinette C., 36, marketing executive

How do you identify? Queer/she/her
What are you looking for in a mate? A kind long-term partner who is looking to have a plus 1 in exploring and venturing into new hobbies, interests, and ways of thinking. Someone who isn’t afraid to have hard and honest conversations and is comfortable with failing at them and trying again; a good communicator!
Biggest turn off: Irritable around children, waitstaff or any person in customer service, and too serious.
Biggest turn on: Great sense of humor, not afraid to be “emotional”, hobby/interest they love and are committed to, and they have established friends/friend groups.
Hobbies: I play with ChocCityCornhole and go to tournaments during the week. Presently learning ASL (slowly), attending Broadway shows, puzzles/Legos, interactive art exhibits
What’s your biggest goal for 2024? Kickstart one of the many business ideas I have locked up in my head. And, learn four recipes I can cook from memory and keep the taste consistent each time.
Pets, kids, neither? I have one dog. I love kids and would love to have kids in my life – whether that’s adopting, by surrogate, or simply fostering.
Would you date someone whose political views differ from your own? It depends.
Celebrity crush: Regina King and Florence Pugh
Name one obscure fact about yourself: Finding a job in finance in 2009 was rough. I did odd jobs with my roommates. One job was cleaning Whitney Houston’s house in Mendam, N.J.
Ashley Smith, 48, hotel management/community volunteer leader

How do you identify? Gay
What are you looking for in a mate? Someone who is personable, witty, charming, loving, driven, a visionary, who is motivated, possesses a great sense of humor, is adventurous, spontaneous, and a leader, who is considerate, passionate, and well rounded.
Biggest turn off: A lack of respect for one’s self and others, someone who lacks humility and is not driven.
Biggest turn on: A great smile, someone who is smart, physically active, able to hold thought-provoking conversations, and we enjoy each others’ company.
Hobbies: Working out, travel, reading, family time, movies, board games, theater, music, learning about wine, meeting new people and learning more of their experiences to know how we all can work to achieve goals, listener, motivator, and supporter.
What’s your biggest goal for 2024? In addition to continuing to work out, I would like to add more family time, visit three new countries, and devote more time to building an even better version of myself as I strive to make the most out of the journey of life.
Pets, kids, neither? None
Would you date someone whose political views differ from your own? Not typically.
Celebrity crush: Rege-Jean Page, just one of many different crushes!
Name one obscure fact about yourself: My passion is to make people smile and see the best they have to offer to the world. Always best to lift your family and friends up. And had the pleasure of singing in the Opening and Closing 1996 Olympic Ceremonies with the Morehouse College Glee Club.
Mark Stephens, 45, business development and marketing/advertising for iHeart Media

How do you identify? Most importantly, I identify as a human being, proudly southern born and bred. No one should be 100% defined by any self-imposed labels. I’ve always referred to myself as “just gay” – because that was the only label available when I was figuring myself out, but I have traits that align with both pansexual and demisexual identities. The most important being that physical attraction, for me, is only 20% of the equation. The other 80% is determined by personality, trust, and connection over time.
What are you looking for in a mate? “Am I LOOKING for a mate?” would be more accurate. Ultimately, yes, I’d love to find someone who is confident, self-sufficient, with a LARGE personality. They’ll need to have a very diverse set of interests, activities, and be willing to share them with me while they explore mine. They’d have to challenge and inspire me to be a better person and I would want to do the same for them.
Biggest turn off: Indifference
Biggest turn on: A caring, sincere personality and a GREAT (read as: dorky) sense of humor.
Hobbies: I’m equally comfortable walking a red carpet, sitting in a boardroom, climbing under a car or on top of a horse. I love the theater – spent years of my life performing professionally (acting, singing, dancing, stunt work) and enjoy all kinds of shows, from either side of the curtain. I love horses, horseback riding. I also enjoy diving elbow-deep into an engine, working on cars, and recently added boat engines to that list, too.
I am passionate about helping others. I serve on the board of directors for the Maryland STEM Festival, volunteer with Capital Pride, and fundraise for the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society.
What’s your biggest goal for 2024? I’m in a rebuilding phase of sorts, so there are several. I’m looking forward to getting into my new house, then rebuilding my life after several really hard losses and changes over the past seven months. Details available, inquire within. Not what you came here to read.
Pets, kids, neither? In a weird & unexpected turn of events this past year, I now have both. My incredible nephew recently moved in with me, because the DMV is a much safer and friendlier place to pursue his gender transition than his home state of Alabama AND he brought his cat with him. It’s a really good thing I love my nephew, because his cat is not even trying to curry favor with me. It’s quite the opposite, actually. For context, the cat is appropriately named Hela after the Norse Goddess of Death and Destruction. The nephew’s name is Matt, just like the book of the Bible.
Would you date someone whose political views differ from your own? This answer depends on how MUCH they differ. Of course, there is a point where the opposing views might prove too much to handle, however, I’m not interested in being surrounded by people with the exact same views as me. We learn, grow, and evolve from those with whom we surround ourselves. Seeking out identical political views seems boring to me – make me challenge and defend my own views and I’ll do the same in return.
Celebrity crush: Sorry folks, but if Ricky Martin, Jason Momoa or Sandra Bullock come calling – I’m gonna carpe THAT diem!
Name one obscure fact about yourself: I’m severely allergic to ALL artificial sweeteners.
Ashanti Martinez, 27, Maryland state delegate

How do you identify? Gay
What are you looking for in a mate? Genuine partnership — I’ve been in situations where things weren’t evenly yoked, and it ultimately led to issues.
Biggest turn off: Poor personal hygiene and unnecessary rudeness to service workers.
Biggest turn on: A warm smile and inviting eyes.
Hobbies: Spending time with loved ones. I work often, so any free time I have I try to spend with the people I love.
What’s your biggest goal for 2024? My goal for this year is to do the most good for as many people as possible.
Pets, kids, neither? Yes to both.
Would you date someone whose political views differ from your own? It’d be difficult, especially because of my career.
Celebrity crush: Jeremy Pope, Keiynan Lonsdale and Omar Apollo
Name one obscure fact about yourself: If you’re into astrology well, I’m a Taurus who was raised by a Taurus and has multiple Taurus family members and best friends.
Molly Whitehorn, 30, campaign professional at the Human Rights Campaign

How do you identify? Bi
What are you looking for in a mate? Someone funny, smart, independent, and confident. I love meeting different types of people and experiencing new things; I’d love to find someone who is friendly and can easily adapt to different social situations.
Biggest turn off: Rudeness and folks who don’t pay attention to current events.
Biggest turn on: Kindness and a good sense of humor
Hobbies: Reading, barre, going to museums, pilates, thrifting, indoor cycling, volunteering, and watching horror movies.
What’s your biggest goal for 2024? I want to become an early morning workout person. It’s not going great so far.
Pets, kids, neither? You tell me.
Would you date someone whose political views differ from your own? Republicans need not apply.
Celebrity crush: Julien Baker, duh!
Name one obscure fact about yourself: I used to host a concert web series out of Elvis’s first home in Memphis.
DJ Heat, 44, DJ

How do you identify? Lesbian
What are you looking for in a mate? Someone to share my world and have fun/laugh with. I picture us doing everything from going to concerts and sporting events, to strolling the cereal aisle, lol.
Biggest turn off: People who have constant negative energy and a pessimistic outlook. Rudeness and impatience toward others is also a big turn off, as well as the overuse of Snapchat filters.
Biggest turn on: A beautiful smile and intelligence. I’m also a sucker for a woman that can cook. I know that a lot of love goes into preparing a meal for a loved one, and I’m greatly appreciative of that.
Hobbies: I’m one of the few people that still loves going to the bookstore and purchasing books and magazines. When the weather is nice I love being outdoors, visiting parks, museums, etc. And of course going to live music and sporting events.
What’s your biggest goal for 2024? My two biggest goals are health and career related. I’m a firm believer though in working in silence and letting the success be the noise. So I will definitely share the accomplishments once they happen. Because they WILL happen.
Pets, kids, neither? I don’t have any pets or kids, but I LOVE dogs! I can’t wait to get one. I have my eyes set on a Shiba Inu.
Would you date someone whose political views differ from your own? It truly depends on what their views are. As a Black gay woman, it’s definitely a problem if you have views aligned with a politician that is against rights for Blacks, gays, and women.
Celebrity crush: Issa Rae and Janelle Monae. Whew!
Name one obscure fact about yourself: I’m currently on a journey to try as many different hot chocolates as possible.
Alex Held, 34, small business manager

How do you identify? Gay male
What are you looking for in a mate? I’m looking for a companion someone to share life with and go on adventures together.
Biggest turn off: People who don’t vote. Especially in this political era.
Biggest turn on: Someone that takes care of their physical and mental health and is open and accepting of others.
Hobbies: I love staying active and I regularly box, lift, run, bike, or swim. In addition I love music festivals and EDM.
What’s your biggest goal for 2024? To help elect a Democratic majority in the House and Senate and defeat Donald Trump.
Pets, kids, neither? I love pets and have a Brittany named Mila. I also like cats and all other animals. I’m undecided on kids at this time, but I’m open to the idea.
Would you date someone whose political views differ from your own? Potentially; however, I can’t be down with a MAGA Republican.
Celebrity crush: Michael B. Jordan
Name one obscure fact about yourself: As a kid I grew up bottle feeding baby cows.
Nati Reyes, 35, cancer research

How do you identify? Queer
What are you looking for in a mate? Looking for someone to be as silly and goofy as I am. Interested in traveling, even just for short trips. Has a decent personal or social life (ie. hobbies ). If you are a great communicator who has currently or recently been to therapy, is super hot to me. In general, a person who is queer, Sapphic, Trans or Non binary, who is interested in growing old together. ( compatibility and chemistry is important). Age isn’t too much of a deal breaker, but 28+ would be nice.
Biggest turn off: People who are mean spirited, send mixed signals, aren’t confident in who they are or what they want, and anyone who thinks they are always right.
Biggest turn on: A sense of humor, confidence, GREAT kisser, quality time and a sucker for a nice smile. ( Oh, did I mention therapy?)
Hobbies: I’m part of a trivia team, roller skate, in a band called 2 hit wonders, and I do a varied amount of community building and organizing from south Korea to NYC to DC. My passion is holding space of mutual care and support of marginalized groups.
What’s your biggest goal for 2024? My biggest goal in 2024 is to get more connected with meditation and the metaphysical world. Work on doing more creative work that I love and to rest.
Pets, kids, neither? I have a cat who I’m allergic to but I love her.
Would you date someone whose political views differ from your own? In 2024? No.
Celebrity crush: Surprisingly, I don’t have one. If I had to I’d say Aubrey Plaza and Rihanna.
Name one obscure fact about yourself: Maybe not that obscure but I really try to hide that I snort when I laugh.
Nicole Lohr, 41, attorney

How do you identify? Gay
What are you looking for in a mate? Haha, uh, mate is such a weird word. I want to be with someone who is confident, driven, and authentic. But most importantly, someone who has a great sense of humor — who can make the whole room laugh.
Biggest turn off: Insecurity, rudeness, and open-mouth chewing.
Biggest turn on: Intellectual, sporty, long-haired butches.
Hobbies: Playing pickleball, traveling, and watching “Jeopardy” and the Celtics.
What’s your biggest goal for 2024? Paint a wall in my house a fun color and start lifting weights so I can live longer.
Pets, kids, neither? I have a chunky orange cat named Lasagna.
Would you date someone whose political views differ from your own? Republican? No. Communist? Maybe.
Celebrity crush: Naomi McPherson, Tegan Quin, Kelley O’Hara, Elena Delle Donne, Kate McKinnon, and Towa Bird.
Name one obscure fact about yourself: I actually have wildly curly hair.
Sarah Pope, 32, nonprofit director

How do you identify? Nonbinary, queer
What are you looking for in a mate? Someone kind that strikes the balance between playful, curious, and motivated to change the world for the better.
Biggest turn off: Being on your phone during a date, being rude to service workers, and putting down others, even if it’s a “joke.”
Biggest turn on: Flirty and witty banter, a great smile, and engaging body language.
Hobbies: The two p’s – pottery and plants. I can make you a vase and then put a clipping in it. I also watch way too much TV, but balance it out by reading a fair amount.
What’s your biggest goal for 2024? Continuing to build more community and trying more things that scare me.
Pets, kids, neither? A three-legged cat son named Birdie.
Would you date someone whose political views differ from your own? If it’s a political view akin to “I prefer tea over coffee,” I can work with that, but otherwise need to be aligned.
Celebrity crush: To capture the spectrum: Mae Martin, Janelle Monae, Alexandra Hedison, Devendra Banhart
Name one obscure fact about yourself: I get really into the spoken portion of songs – think the part of “One of Your Girls,” when he goes “Look at you, skip the application, interview.” Big on a dramatic reading and any excuse to be a tiny bit theatrical.
Ralph Alston, 35, graphic designer

How do you identify? he/him/his
What are you looking for in a mate? Charm, a sense of humor, and an active lifestyle (physically or socially)
Biggest turn off: Gossip
Biggest turn on: Equal parts smiles and surprises.
Hobbies: Playing Just Dance, tending to my plants, hot tubs, league sports (darts, bocce, cornhole, trivia) and anything crafty.
What’s your biggest goal for 2024? This year, I really want to break out of my comfort zone and try something new. Maybe it’s hiking, maybe studying a new language. Something I don’t have to do on my own would be pretty great too!
Pets, kids, neither? I have my four-year-old Pug named Tofu. He’s soft, squishy, and easy to spoil, and a Sag just like dad.
Would you date someone whose political views differ from your own? I don’t think I could. (I’m a liberal, btw.)
Celebrity crush: Michael B. Jordan
Name one obscure fact about yourself: I love to cook, but I have the ability to recreate any dish I’ve ever eaten, without ever referring to a recipe.
Malachi J. Stewart, 35, public health analyst

How do you identify? Queer/gay
What are you looking for in a mate? Communicative, transparency, confidence and ambition.
Biggest turn off: Deception, manipulation, and elitism.
Biggest turn on: Empathy, vulnerability, and strong verbal communication skills.
Hobbies: Kickboxing/boxing, skating, bowling and museums.
What’s your biggest goal for 2024? Launching a college-based sexual health campaign.
Pets, kids, neither? I have a very possessive Shorkie, so I’m a dog lover! Kids are optional.
Would you date someone whose political views differ from your own? Of course. Let’s talk about it. Perhaps you can convince me?
Celebrity crush: Winston Duke
Name one obscure fact about yourself: As a kid, I was An ASL interpreter for my church.
Megan Green, 31, practice owner and psychotherapist

How do you identify? Lesbian
What are you looking for in a mate? In a mate I look for someone ideally my age, who is kind, confident. I am looking for someone who knows what is important to her and is living in accordance with that.
Biggest turn off: My biggest turn off is probably “negging”. I am a Leo and one of my love languages are words of affirmation. Words matter a lot to me.
Biggest turn on: I love watching someone’s face light up when they talk about something they are passionate about. Whatever it is you can’t get off your mind, I want to hear about.
Hobbies: I enjoy fitness, crafts, video games, cooking, reading and reality TV.
What’s your biggest goal for 2024? I am investing time and money into developing a plot of land into a rental property in eastern Georgia. So that is a goal I am actively working on and hoping to make a lot of progress with this year.
Pets, kids, neither? I have neither, I have no qualms about dating a pet parent. I am not sure that I am interested in children.
Would you date someone whose political views differ from your own? No.
Celebrity crush: Kristin Kreuk
Name one obscure fact about yourself: I can sing pretty well.
a&e features
The mastery of love
The world knows Eric Anderson as Billy Porter’s partner, but in Rehoboth Beach, he has a story entirely his own
The world knows Eric Anderson as Billy Porter’s partner. In Rehoboth Beach, Del., he has a life — and a story — entirely his own.
My first time with Eric Anderson was hot — very hot. Before he arrived, I sat waiting, overthinking everything. When he finally appeared in a loose-fitting T-shirt and purple shorts, I understood why he attracts attention. Eric is the kind of man who changes the energy of a room simply by entering it.
After a quick hello, we got right to it. Techno pulsed through the room as Eric told me how to move, where to place my hands, when to breathe. My heart pounded. My muscles ached. I bent, twisted, and stretched while sweat ran down my back and burned my eyes. I didn’t bother wiping it away.
To be clear, Eric and I were not alone. Five other people were with us — and the yoga studio at SoulFire Collective in Rehoboth Beach was heated to 87 degrees.
“If you are always racing toward the next moment, what happens to the one you’re in?” Eric asked, opening his power yoga class and inviting us to leave whatever had followed us through the door and surrender to the present. Surrender did not come easily. At 58, I’ve done enough yoga to know the difference between discomfort and imminent death. Halfway through Eric’s relentless flow, the distinction began to blur.
A playlist of techno and remixed pop — including “Live Like You Were Dying” — carried us from one demanding pose to the next. Eric moved among the mats with the energy of a nightclub DJ and the calm of someone who trusted our bodies to go further than our minds believed possible. Nearly an hour later, when the music softened and I collapsed onto my back in savasana, he laid a cool cloth across my forehead. I exhaled — relieved, and maybe a little disappointed, that my first time with Eric was over.
At the end of my mat, a handwritten note congratulated me on my first class and invited me back — a small benediction after the storm. Then Eric closed the class by repeating the question with which he’d opened. For a man whose relationship with actor and singer Billy Porter has drawn him unexpectedly into the public eye, it sounded less like a yoga mantra than a personal creed.
The next time I meet Eric, there is air conditioning and caffeine. We are at Starbucks, where I deliberately order the largest drinks available, as though volume alone might buy me more time. He chooses a matcha, and I order herbal tea. My heart is pounding again, faster than the soft rock drifting from the speakers above us. Although I’ve already spent more than an hour with Eric, I know almost nothing about the man I’m about to interview.
Neither, it seems, does anyone else.
Celebrity outlets offer a handful of biographical details: a Rehoboth Beach teacher and yoga instructor with a master’s degree from Columbia University. Gay publications have been less restrained. One introduced him as Billy Porter’s “total hot stud,” called him “a snacc,” and praised his ability to “rock a Speedo.” Queerty distilled Eric’s identity to five words: “Porter is dating a teacher.”
All of it tells me how the world sees him. None of it tells me who he is.
I know from our text exchanges that Eric is slammed for time. He is scheduled to travel to New York later that day and fly to WorldPride Amsterdam the following afternoon. Billy is among the headliners for the opening-night Unity Concert and is also slated to perform at the Wedding Party XXL alongside KI/KI, Bimini, and the Vengaboys. Eric still has to pack. This, I’m beginning to understand, is part of loving someone famous: there is almost always an itinerary, another city, and a specific time and place Billy needs to be. Even here, with two untouched drinks between us, the clock is ticking.

As soon as we sit down, I open my laptop, ready to get to work. My mind is focused on the list of questions I’ve prepared, and I’ve already anticipated the shape of most of his responses. Then I look up and see Eric sitting perfectly still, smiling, and taking in the moment. He hasn’t even taken a sip of his matcha yet.
I quietly close my laptop and breathe.
Within minutes, the interview softens into a conversation.
Eric earned a bachelor’s degree in history from the University of Delaware and a master’s in public school leadership from Teachers College, Columbia University. He began his career teaching mathematics before moving into school administration, eventually serving as vice president of the Charter School of Wilmington and head of school at Sussex Academy. Today, he teaches mathematics and social studies in the Cape Henlopen School District. He also coaches soccer and leads yoga classes at SoulFire Collective in Rehoboth Beach.
His return to the classroom was deliberate. Eric knows some people assumed there must be a story behind his leaving administration—that he had done something wrong or that teaching represented a demotion.
“I want to make it clear that I went back to teaching by choice,” he says.
As a child, Eric played school. Teaching has always felt natural to him, less like an occupation than an expression of who he is. Administration was different.
“It felt like work,” he says. “It wasn’t where my passion was, and it didn’t bring me joy. Going back into the classroom was simply me choosing joy.”
The more Eric talks, the clearer it becomes that teaching is not merely a job but a vocation. His mother is white and his father is Black, and growing up biracial was not always easy. “I saw the best and the worst of both,” he tells me. Those experiences helped shape his desire to become a teacher — to be the kind of person who could make a meaningful difference in a young person’s life.
Just then, Eric glances over his shoulder and locks eyes with someone across the room. He waves and flashes what is quickly becoming his signature smile. My first thought is that someone has recognized him as Billy Porter’s partner.
I’m wrong. It’s one of his former students.
Inevitably, our conversation turns to love — and to Billy. I’ve made it clear that I’m here to write about Eric, not Billy Porter. But separating the two entirely would be as artificial as defining Eric only by their relationship. Billy is now an essential part of his story.
Eric met Billy at a Christmas party hosted by mutual friends who had been trying to introduce them all night. It wasn’t easy — the party was crowded, and the two men never quite crossed paths. Eric stayed for the afterparty, where a friend nudged him and nodded toward the room: Billy was looking his way. Romance never crossed his mind.
Eventually, they started talking. Eric has never had much patience for small talk, and he wasn’t interested in cataloging which celebrities Billy knew. He skipped it entirely and went straight for the deeper questions — what Billy believed, how he saw the world, what mattered to him. They ended up at the kitchen table, trading life philosophies until 5 a.m.
What struck Eric most wasn’t the conversation’s length. It was its depth. Billy wasn’t who he expected. Neither was the conversation. By the time the sun was coming up, Eric was less surprised that they’d talked all night than by how much, it turned out, they had in common.
They had dinner the following evening, and Billy invited Eric to spend the weekend with him in New York. There, Billy took him to see Nicole Scherzinger in “Sunset Boulevard.” Right before the show started, he casually introduced Eric to a friend named Katy. Back in their seats, Eric asked how Billy knew her.
“BITCH,” Billy replied, “that is Miss K-A-T-Y P-E-R-R-Y!”
For all the glamour surrounding their courtship, Eric describes the foundation of their relationship in decidedly spiritual terms. His favorite book is don Miguel Ruiz’s The Mastery of Love, which explores how fear, expectation, and the need for approval can distort relationships. Its philosophy closely resembles Eric’s own.
On the surface, Eric and Billy inhabit different worlds. Eric is a deeply spiritual teacher rooted in a small coastal Delaware town. Billy is a celebrated actor and performer whose larger-than-life persona commands stages around the world. But when I ask Eric how the relationship works, he doesn’t hesitate.
“I know that I can be my authentic self with him, and he can be his with me,” he says. “We love each other unconditionally.”
The words could sound rehearsed. Coming from Eric, they don’t.
The red carpets, famous faces, and international travel are not what matter most.
“It’s all about the people,” he explains. “I love Billy’s family and friends, and he loves mine.”
Authenticity surfaces repeatedly in our conversation — not as an abstract ideal, but as Eric’s determination to trust what feels right for him, even when other people may not understand it. I tell him about growing up in Pittsburgh and spending much of my life trying to fit the person I was into the person the world expected me to be. Eric listens intently, then pauses before responding.
“Fuck the system.”
It is blunt, funny, and entirely consistent with the man sitting across from me. Dating Billy may have dramatically increased the number of strangers who have opinions about Eric, but it hasn’t increased the number whose opinions matter to him. He is remarkably unconcerned with what people he doesn’t know think — or say — about him. The attention is new. His response to it is not.
For Eric, authenticity isn’t about asking the world for permission to be yourself. It’s about deciding that permission was never the world’s to give.
That instinct—to look inward rather than outward for permission — predates Billy.
Eric initially turned to yoga for a practical reason: he wanted to improve his physical performance on the soccer field. It didn’t take long for him to realize that something else was happening. Yoga was strengthening his body, but it was also grounding him.
Over time, the physical practice became inseparable from the mental one. The poses, the heat, even the strength required to hold his body in place became less important than learning how to quiet the noise around him, stay present, and listen to himself. The man who had pushed me through an hour of sweat and discomfort wasn’t simply teaching people how to move their bodies. He was asking them to practice something he had learned to do himself.
That sense of being grounded has become particularly important in a relationship that often requires two people to live very different lives. Eric is quick to point out that he and Billy have separate careers, separate ambitions, and goals entirely their own. Neither expects the other to abandon an individual life simply because they have chosen to build a relationship together.
When Billy left for London to star in “Cabaret,” distance became part of their routine. They FaceTimed every day, a practice they continue whenever they are apart.
“I tell Billy everything,” Eric says.
Being authentic with Billy doesn’t require the two men to become more alike. If anything, the opposite seems true. They are comfortable following their own career paths, living separate lives when circumstances require it, and giving each other the freedom to pursue what matters individually. Then they come back together — not because either has put his own life on hold, but because they have chosen to share those lives with each other.
When we finally look at the time, nearly 90 minutes have passed. Eric still needs to pack. New York is waiting, Amsterdam after that, and somewhere there is undoubtedly an itinerary telling Billy exactly where he needs to be and when.
But for a while, neither of us was racing toward the next moment.
We were fully inside the one we were in.
a&e features
What ‘Queer Eye for the Straight Guy’ can still teach us
Producer David Collins on lasting impact of hit series
It’s hard to imagine where LGBTQ+ television would be without “Queer Eye for the Straight Guy,” the trailblazing reality series that premiered in 2003.
Each episode of this Emmy-winning show saw a group of gays converge on a struggling man — the titular straight guy — and offer nonstop wit while organizing his endlessly messy life. This program about a group of homosexual helpers took the world by storm, furthering the love of gay television begun by shows like “Will and Grace” but bringing it into the growing medium of reality TV. Of course, it wasn’t perfect; “Queer Eye for the Straight Guy” often cast its experts less as multi-faceted queer folks and more as sources of early 2000s gay jokes. But despite these pitfalls, it’s undeniable that the original program explored the realities of being gay in a way audiences had never seen before. It was a monumental piece of LGBTQ+ representation, and its success is largely owed to the man who fought to get this show made: producer David Collins.
Collins spoke with the Blade from his Los Angeles home, where he’s spent the past few years living with his husband and his two daughters. David spoke fondly of his many years in the industry, detailing how it feels to be such a huge part of LGBTQ+ history. He explained, however, that he didn’t initially set out to alter how queer people were seen on television. “I never went out to make gay television,” said the producer. “I went out to tell great stories.”
“I’m a hillbilly from Ohio, and I thought I was going to be an editor,” David laughed, looking back on his career. “I interned at the Cincinnati Film Office, and I showed up to work my very first day, and the film commissioner was like, ‘Get to the airport right now and pick [someone] up. Don’t talk to them.’ Well, I ended up picking up Jodie Foster.” Collins raved about this car ride that changed his life, with the pair becoming friends and Foster pushing him to become a producer who puts their own media out into the world. Eventually, he did just that, and after learning about the wild new genre that was reality TV, he pitched a series to Bravo: “Queer Eye for the Straight Guy.”
“I was obsessed with Esquire magazine, and they had five categories: fashion, grooming, interior design, culture, food, and wine. So I gave them each a gay, and the Fab Five were born!” Collins said, describing how viewers quickly fell in love with the concept and earned the program four seasons and an Emmy for Outstanding Reality Program. He spoke about how proud he felt creating a show that centered real gay people, not characters in a story, remembering, “To stand in the middle of Times Square and look up and see this massive billboard with the original Queer Eye guys…it wasn’t even a dream come true, because it wasn’t a dream I had even fathomed.”
With his series, people were watching actual gay men and learning the realities of a queer culture that had always been portrayed as a danger to society. Collins tearfully recounted hearing about queer people using the show as a way to connect with their family, saying, “What I’m most proud of that’s come out of Queer Eye [are] the conversations that that series has allowed to have people around their kitchen tables with little boys in Ohio like me who were scared to death that they were going to burn in hell because their pastor was telling them that they were a sinner.”
Now, for all of its trailblazing, the program wasn’t wholly positive; the show’s focus on the central ‘straight guy’ meant it rarely delved into the lives of its Fab Five. Collins regretted that lack of depth but understood that earlier audiences weren’t accustomed to such a nuanced look into queerness — that would have to wait for the reboot.
When “Queer Eye” came out in 2018, audiences were introduced to not only a new Fab Five, but a whole new format (that didn’t rely on a straight person). Now, the series would assist queer folks and allies alike, spotlighting these individuals as well as the queer experts helping them improve their lives. The show has been applauded for its amazing makeovers, but where it truly stands out is its representation, offering a look into individuals across the country and the struggles — along with the immense joys — of being queer in America today.
Fans were disappointed to hear that “Queer Eye” would be ending after its 10th season, but David stressed that they wouldn’t have to be sad for long. “What I will say to you is this: hang tight,” he teased. “There’s yet another version of ‘Queer Eye’ to come, and we’re working on that now.” In the meantime, Collins is continuing his work with new shows like the “House of Stassi,” a series centered on “Vanderpump Rules’”prolific waitress. He’s excited about these new projects, but emphasized that his heart will always belong to “Queer Eye for the Straight Guy” and all that it continues to do for viewers 19 years after its finale.
“It’s not about your new outfit or your new couch or your new whatever. It’s about your humanity,” said Collins, speaking about the core lesson he hopes people take away from the Queer Eye franchise. “It’s about seeing yourself. It’s about dignity. It’s about how confidence breeds success.”
A valuable message that queer folks can benefit from even more now than they did in 2003. And, while it’s unclear just what lies ahead for this franchise, one thing is for sure: “Queer Eye for the Straight Guy” helped people everywhere understand the power that exists within our queerness. It’s a truth that has impacted countless pieces of LGBTQ+ television today, and it’s one that Collins promises to keep alive through whatever hit show he creates next.
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Jason DePuy on coping with homophobia in ‘Big Brother’ house
First drag queen contestant on CBS show fought to stay positive
One week after Jason DePuy (known as Salina EsTitties on “RuPaul’s Drag Race”) was bullied and eventually evicted from CBS’s “Big Brother” house, the queer drag performer is still emotionally processing his feelings.
During his 24 days in the reality TV competition, DePuy often had a rough time, with fellow cast member Kamuela “Kamu” Kirk making homophobic comments and feeling isolated.
In a conversation with Head of Household Rick Devens, Kirk left viewers upset when he said, “Bro, miss me with the drag stuff. Miss me. I’m still an MMA guy, and I have an image to uphold.”
Former “Big Brother” contestant Frankie Grande called his words ‘homophobic’ and ‘gross.’ Another comment, where Kirk said he wanted to end DePuy’s career, also received strong backlash online.
Now that he is out of the house, DePuy has been shocked and deeply touched by the love from “Big Brother” fans and former contestants. We chatted with DePuy for this Blade exclusive.
“To know that my community was rallying for me outside the house was the most wonderful thing. Seeing how much people were just wanting to shower me with love was incredible. Even my friends, I went to say hi and give them a hug, and they’re like, ‘Uh, uh, come here.’ They had to hold me and let me know America was feeling for me in a way that I had no idea.”
He added: “To see that reality was just overwhelming, and I couldn’t ask for more.”
Known as a messy player in the house, DePuy often had to fight to stay positive and stand up for himself.
“No one was coming to my rescue. In real life, it’s easy to block people, but in the house, I didn’t have that luxury, so I had to find it within myself to learn how to speak up for myself in a way that wasn’t nasty or biting. I didn’t attack anyone personally, which is what I was the most proud of.”
DePuy acknowledged he has had a history of putting his foot in his mouth when it came to certain “Drag Race”moments, being in the public eye, and making a fool of himself. “I’ve learned my lessons; to see how I handled myself in the ‘Big Brother’ house was amazing.”
While DePuy has been sober for 14 and a half years and has a strong spiritual foundation, in the Big Brother house, he often felt like he couldn’t communicate what he was feeling.
“As a queer person, a person of color, a drag queen, I have to be very careful about how I move. I don’t have the luxury or privilege to just act a certain way or say a certain thing. I have to be very careful; I’m representing me. But who I am is a Latino, a person of recovery, a drag queen, a queer person in the community. I know that there’s a lot of pressure that comes with that. I felt it was safer for me to sit there and just breathe than try to do anything crazy.”
He continued: “I couldn’t speak to the personal attack that was happening in the house, because in my mind I was like, ‘no, this is a game, and I have to play it, put that aside.’”
Not only can viewers watch the episodes, but they can also watch the live feeds of what’s happening. Seeing the fans’ social media posts from people who had watched the episodes and the live feeds also contributed to DePuy realizing that his feelings of discomfort were valid.
“To know that I wasn’t delusional in those moments, that others could see what was happening, has been a lot to take in. Fans and friends let me know the comments made went beyond the game…I’m like, ‘Oh, so my instincts were correct.”
One of the most poignant moments on the live feeds occurred when DePuy was crying, alone in his room, and said how he missed his gay community.
“I really missed my friends. I missed my queer community. We’re so colorful. We’re so loud. We’re so vibrant. We speak off the cuff, and we’re very truthful and honest with how we speak, and it’s fun. We have fun lingo.”
DePuy had to censor his expressions in the house. “Because I can say one thing, but it can mean something different to straight people than it does with my queer brothers and sisters. So, there was a sense of code-switching that I had to do. I had to even put aside some of my queerness in a way sometimes to fit in.”
DePuy was thrilled to be the very first drag queen to ever be cast on the show.
“I’m honored to have been chosen. There’s a million drag queens out there, and to know that I was a contender to come in the house and not even be in drag was like a wow for me. I’m over here in Hollywood, running around these streets with a wig and heels just to make a dollar to survive, and I have to rely on drag to do that. And then to be offered this opportunity and be given the privilege to say, ‘hey, you don’t have to put on the wig for you to be valuable here,’ is just insane to me.”
Prior to his shows, DePuy has been hustling for 15 years, flipping burgers and doing drag at night.
“That has been my life these past since I was 17. So it’s been a long journey; the opportunity to do this out of drag is a very big blessing. I’m honored and grateful to be the representation of my community.”
If you missed Jason on “Big Brother: Unlocked,” the episode can be seen on CBS.com. He will be back on the show for the finale.
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