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Recovery Reads: Reading in on your journey toward sobriety

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summer reading, gay news, Washington Blade

The path away from substance abuse is laden with hazards, a minefield where the misstep of a moment can detonate a crisis after years of hard-won progress. 

For those soldiering through the haze alone, quite frequently the case of isolated LGBTQ people who have suffered years of isolating trauma, several important important book bear unflinching witness and offer purposeful guidance — helping illuminate a way out of addiction’s oblivion. These books are particularly important to people who are not yet ready to ask for him, giving the reader private guidance on their own terms, at their own speed. These books mind the reader that they have not journeyed too far away from their authentic selves, and that their surrender to alcohol, drugs, and compulsive behaviors can be overcome. 

These books range from Dustin Dunbar’s searing memoir “You’re Doing Great! And Other Lies Alcohol Told Me” (Central Recovery Press) to total abstinence and moderation guides like “Soberish” (HarperOne) by Kayla Lyons.

Avoiding the severe strictures of total abstinence, Lyons opens with the inclusive query “Are you ready to take your power back from alcohol?” Whether answering with a resounding “yes” to getting booze-free or a tentative “maybe” to finding moderation, her book provides an arsenal of evidence-based tools — from cold exposure therapy to sound healing and beyond — to chart a compassionate course for creating a moderate, self-determined drinking practice or kicking the habit entirely. By grounding readers in the psychology of substance use, walking them through backsliding risks, and encouraging them to rebuild an alcohol-free identity, Lyons attempts to launch a “sober-ish” movement tailored to the modern age.

For those ambivalent about quitting entirely or simply seeking to reset an unhealthy relationship with substances, Kayla Lyons offers a millennial-focused, non-judgmental guidebook in “Soberish” (HarperOne). 

Avoiding the severe strictures of total abstinence, Lyons opens with the inclusive query “Are you ready to take your power back from alcohol?” Whether answering with a resounding “yes” to getting booze-free or a tentative “maybe” to finding moderation, her book provides an arsenal of evidence-based tools – from cold exposure therapy to sound healing and beyond – to chart a compassionate course for creating a moderate, self-determined drinking practice or kicking the habit entirely. By grounding readers in the psychology of substance use, walking them through backsliding risks, and encouraging them to rebuild an alcohol-free identity, Lyons attempts to launch a “sober-ish” movement tailored to the modern age.

LGBTQ readers struggling with the triple-threat of meth, sex and identity problems will find candid perspective and support from David Fawcett’s “Lust, Men, and Meth” (Hazelden). With insights blended from addiction and sex therapy, the book explores how methamphetamine can hijack the brain’s dopamine systems governing mood, sex drive and compulsive behaviors. Through explicit case studies, Fawcett examines the vulnerabilities of some gay men who turn to meth to soothe feelings of disconnection, unattractiveness or being left out of the community – only to then confront serious issues from HIV/AIDS to the erosion of their sexual selves. 

But the book moves beyond profiling the problem to providing solutions, equipping readers (and their helping professionals) with therapeutic tools and strategies for managing the recovery process. With increased distance from the drug, readers delve through a reckoning with powerful emotions like shame that meth once allowed them to bury, and ultimately rebuilding their relationships, identities and capacity for fulfilling sexual expression.

The harrowing “My Suicide Race” (Zinnia Books) by Mark Turnipseed lays bare the often-unseen connections between addiction, self-harm and sexuality trauma. At the tender age of six, Turnipseed internalized the soul-crushing message from his religious community that being gay made him destined for eternal damnation. His confusion and self-hatred set him on a devastating trajectory of alcoholism, drug abuse, prostitution and suicide attempts as he tried to become the straight boy he thought he was supposed to be.

Turnipseed spares no detail in this honest debut memoir, taking readers inside the tormented mind of an addict and trauma survivor in full denial, upending the lives of everyone who loved him. Only after surviving numerous relapses did he finally find a surprising key to saving himself – extreme physical challenges like training for a triathlon provided an avenue to rebuild self-acceptance and authenticity. While heartbreaking in its candor, Turnipseed’s book offers hope that even those who struggle for years can overcome the addictions so often brought on by shame and self-loathing. 

For loved one’s desperate to intervene and lacking tools beyond tough love, Brad Lamm’s “How to Help the One You Love” (Central Recovery Press) equips readers with concrete, myth-busting steps to pull someone back from the brink of self-destructive behaviors, be they alcohol, gambling, drugs or otherwise. 

Bucking the “let them hit bottom” approach of the ages, Lamm objects.

Opening with a stinging wake-up call – “Is your husband drinking himself to death?” – Lamm insists that worried spouses, parents and friends can actually wield tremendous power to change people through urgent action, countering the abstinent approach of passively watching and waiting for the addict to hit rock bottom. 

Dividing his book into sections like “Understand” and “Engage,” Lamm provides a roadmap for initiating productive confrontations, avoiding enabling behaviors, and operating through a framework of love and accountability rather than shame and punishment. 

For those unwilling to endure abuse or watch their loved one spiral indefinitely, Lamm’s guide promises a possible path forward from desperation.

Though the path away from addiction’s torment is strewn with obstacles, these authors inscribe stepstones toward the light — reminders that even those battered by years of struggle and self-loathing can find rebirth. Their words hold open the gates of ​​recovery for all willing to undertake the journey, bright beacons cutting through the haze and reaffirming that redemption awaits for any who reclaim their authenticity. With rawness, wisdom, and compassion, they extend a hopeful hand to those wandering the swamps of alcoholism, substance abuse, toxic behaviors, and who wish to find their way home to their true selves once more.

Breathe Life Healing Center offers provides evidence-based clinical care in a supportive environment for transformation and change.

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Safer Ways to Pay for Online Performances and Queer Events

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Queer events and online performances give many people a sense of connection, identity, and artistic expression. These gatherings range from small independent drag shows streamed from home studios to large in-person events with hundreds of attendees. They help sustain performers, organizers, technicians, and community workers who rely on reliable contributions to continue creating and sharing their work.

Many people who attend or support these events want trustworthy payment options that protect both privacy and financial information. Safety matters not only because of the usual risks of online payments but also because some supporters prefer to keep their legal identity separate from the queer spaces they enjoy. This can involve concerns about outing, data exposure, or personal security. Whenever money is exchanged, the process should feel comfortable and respectful of those realities.

Paying Safely on Ticketing and Event Platforms

If we look at how heavily regulated payment systems maintain security, we can better understand what safe processing should involve. A clear example can be seen in environments where payment risks are closely monitored and tightly controlled, such as online casinos that rely on card-based transactions. Credit card casinos in the US accept familiar payment options like Visa and Mastercard, and allow instant deposits. Their systems rely on strict verification steps that confirm identity, block unauthorized access, and protect cardholders from fraud. Learning about how credit card casinos verify payments can offer useful insight into the safety measures that many reliable ticketing platforms use as well.

Queer events often partner with smaller ticketing services. These services vary in sophistication, so users benefit from paying attention to the connection type, the checkout format, and any information the site provides about privacy. A ticketing page should load with a secure connection, show recognizable payment processing partners, and avoid asking for unnecessary personal details. When a site offers a choice between credit cards and debit cards, a credit card often provides more protection. Credit card disputes also tend to be faster and involve less risk to a person’s own funds. Adding text-based verification codes to an account adds an additional layer of safety for anyone concerned about unauthorized access.

Digital Payment Options That Offer Privacy and Simplicity

More and more performers and event‑goers rely on digital payment systems because they work well. Services such as Apple Pay, Google Pay, and PayPal mask card numbers by using secure tokens. Using this plan means fewer eyes will ever see your private records. When someone pays through these tools, the artist or organizer receives confirmation of payment without gaining access to the person’s card information. If you prefer anonymity, this tool gives you extra space between your actual name and your internet footprint. It helps keep card numbers safe even if the site or app you’re using gets compromised.

Using a prepaid card adds another shield for your money. They operate independently from a person’s main bank accounts, which limits the damage if a card number is stolen. A prepaid card lets donors give quietly, because the payment isn’t linked to their main bank account. A lot of folks in the queer community value that sort of boundary, particularly when they live in places where keeping things private matters for their health. When choosing a prepaid card, it helps to pick a widely recognized brand with consumer safeguards. You’ll have protection when the card is misplaced, stolen, or a charge slips through mistakenly.

Supporting Queer Creators While Safeguarding Identity

Many queer performers rely on tips or direct contributions to cover everyday expenses and production costs. Online payment apps can reveal the payer’s full legal name, which complicates things for people who prefer to participate more quietly. To address this, supporters often turn to platforms that allow display names instead of full identity details. Ko-fi, Patreon, and Gumroad offer this type of flexibility. These services process transactions through secure systems designed to keep card information hidden at every step.

Livestream performers sometimes use encrypted direct-payment links as well. These links are simple to use and limit exposure by taking supporters straight to a protected payment page. Cryptocurrency appeals to a smaller group of supporters because it separates transactions from bank accounts, though it also carries financial risks that users should understand before relying on it regularly. Community-based support pools have also gained attention. In these systems, a group of contributors sends money into a shared fund, and the organizer distributes it to performers. This setup reduces the number of times each individual needs to enter their payment details, which can be an advantage for supporters who value privacy.

Safer Payment Choices at In-Person Queer Events

At live queer events, organizers rely on compact card readers that connect to a tablet or a smartphone. If you wander through a craft market or a late-night concert, you’ll spot these devices everywhere. Many readers accept tap-to-pay, which provides extra protection. When you tap a card or a phone, the terminal gets a token instead of the real card number. It cuts the odds of a breach and lets the transaction finish fast.

You’ll often see QR codes handy for sending a tip or a donation. Since a printed code can be swapped out by a malicious person, it’s wise to verify that the code appears purposeful and that the artist or supplier confirms it’s correct. Rather than exposing a primary credit line, certain fans prefer a prepaid card or an alias set up in their digital wallet for face-to-face payments. This reduces the chance of linking their legal name to the event while still supporting the performers they care about.

Final Thoughts

Queer events and online performances thrive when supporters feel safe and respected. Choosing appropriate payment methods plays a large part in preserving that sense of comfort. Digital wallets, prepaid cards, secure ticketing platforms, and responsible in-person practices all help protect personal information. With these tools, people can participate in queer culture while keeping control over how their financial details are used and shared. The result is a more supportive environment for both creators and the community members who sustain them.

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6 Creative DIY Party Ideas for LGBTQ+ Celebrations

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June is Pride Month, and most of the LGBTQ+ community comes together to celebrate in the shape of parades, parties, and festivals. But why limit yourself to just one month in the year to celebrate all types of love and gender expression?

You can have celebrations throughout the year and create a theme around each event to support and cheer on the queer community. From activities to drinks and snacks, there are so many ways to DIY your own unforgettable event.

1. Paint And Sip

Paint and sip events are sophisticated get-togethers, although they’ve been known to spiral into revelry every so often as the wine flows.

Setting up your own paint and sip party is easy, as long as you have access to a hobby store. Purchase a couple of canvases, oil paints, and brushes, and you’re pretty much ready to go. You should also, of course, stock up on wine or your drinks of choice.

Once your guests arrive, everyone settles down with their art supplies and starts painting. You can stick to a pride-themed painting, or have everyone paint anything they want.

2. Fabulous Casino Night

You can never go wrong with a casino night at home. Classic casino parties involve poker tables and other card games, and you can ask your guests to dress up as if they’re going to one of the top luxury casinos in Vegas.

If your friends are a bit more tech-savvy, you can show them online casino platforms, and everyone can log onto a game together to play.

It’s recommended that you get a bit of practice first if you’re new to gambling, so review resources like 99Bitcoins Telegram casino guide to practice your gambling skills on a couple of Telegram casinos before you make a fool of yourself when your guests arrive.

3. Rainbow-Themed Cocktail Evening

Who doesn’t love a rainbow-inspired event? A fun way to get everyone involved in the celebrations is to assign all your guests a color before the event, and ask them to bring the ingredients for a cocktail of that color. Think sangria for red, appletini for green, and pineapple daiquiri for yellow.

Once everyone arrives, you can get started with the mixing and tasting. As an added bit of fun, request that each of the attendees also dress up in the colors they’ve been assigned.

4. LGBTQIA+ Trivia Night

A trivia night is the perfect opportunity to test your guests’ knowledge on all things queer. Questions can include famous LGBTQIA+ personalities, organizations, or historical events.

Just be clear about the rules upfront, including how answers should be submitted and how points are scored. You should get small prizes for the winners of each round, like candy, magnets, and restaurant vouchers for the big winners.

5. Drag Bingo Night

Planning a drag bingo night is a lot of fun, but you need some organizational skills to pull it off. You will first have to hire a drag performer, or if you’re gutsy enough, dress up in drag yourself. The drag performer will act as the host, calling out the numbers and entertaining your guests.

You will also have to prepare the bingo cards. There are plenty of free online resources to help, but you will have to print out the physical cards yourself. If you feel the inspiration, customize the cards with a Pride theme.

Next, you have to source the prizes. Custom t-shirts, gift cards, or mugs are all great bingo prizes. Or, you can make a donation in the winner’s name to an LGBTQIA+ charity.

Once your guests arrive, the fun can start. Online bingo platforms can do the number draws for you, or you can do it old school-style and add a couple of numbered balls to a box.

6. Pride-Themed Movie Night

A chilled movie night can also be a fun celebration, especially if you’re watching a queer-friendly film.

Some options include:

  • Brokeback Mountain
  • Love, Simon
  • Call Me By Your Name
  • Girl
  • Moonlight
  • Paris Is Building
  • Pariah

Invite your guests to arrive in comfy clothes or pyjamas, and create a cozy atmosphere with lots of blankets, scatter cushions, soft seating, and of course, the typical movie snacks like popcorn and pizza.

If it’s your type of thing, you can encourage discussion about the movie once it is completed, like metaphors in the film, or whether anyone has had similar experiences to the characters.

Wrapping Up

Celebrating the queer community with a party at home can be easy with a little creative inspiration and some prior planning. What really matters when hosting is how you make your guests feel. The LGBTQIA+ community often faces discrimination and other challenges, and your role as host is to provide a safe, fun, and welcoming atmosphere for everyone in attendance.

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Forget what you thought you knew about senior living.

Bountiful amenities and myriad program offerings provide countless opportunities to explore, learn, and connect.

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A focus on wellness. A wide array of concierge services, an executive pastry chef, and skilled mixologist. Technology baked into mobile apps and smart homes. Luxe touches within the big and small details that matter. 

They all come together at The Mather in Tysons, Virgina, a forward-thinking Life Plan Community that upends all the stereotypes of traditional senior living. It’s a residential wellness destination for those 62 and better, consisting of 288 luxury apartment homes. And it’s 90% sold!

One of the most sought-after residences in Northern Virginia, The Mather is THE destination if you’re focused on aging well. If you want to be immersed in new cultural experiences, art, food and nature. If you expect more out of living well.

At the heart of this award-winning community is wellness, which was embedded in the design from day one. The property features 3-acres of green space with walking trails, a concert lawn and dog park – much of which is accessible to the public. You can wander through sculpture gardens, stroll on walking paths, play bocce or badminton, or linger with friends at one of the fire tables and patios. 

Residents experience halotherapy in the Breath Lounge, where a Himalayan salt wall and zero-gravity seating combine for an evidence-based wellness journey.

Biophilic design throughout connects residents to the outdoors even when inside. The careful inclusion of nature within architecture is proven to nurture well-being. At The Mather, it comes to life through elements such as natural light, greenery, and wood materials which invite a sense of calm that’s often missing from modern indoor spaces. A commitment to using sustainable materials and creating a paperless environment contribute to caring for our planet.

When visiting, take time to explore the fitness center, which is equipped with advanced cardio and strength-training equipment, percussive therapy tools, and an AI-enabled body composition analyzer.

You might see residents enjoying a group class in Pilates, or practicing yoga or tai chi on the outdoor terrace. A heated indoor pool and infrared sauna are spaces for aquatic exercise and rejuvenation.

The full-service spa, Marzenia, offers a holistic menu of traditional spa treatments, including the Gharieni’s Welnamis wave bed, which uses sound and vibration to promote deep relaxation, and a Breath Lounge.

Culinary experiences at The Mather rival those of a high-end resort, with multiple on-site restaurants that curate global cuisine, as well as a bakery and pastry kitchen, and a bar+lounge with its own mixologist. Among them are all-day restaurant Maku (Finnish for savor), modern causal restaurant with outdoor seating Saam (Afrikaans for together), refined dinner venue Tashi (Tibetan for good fortune) and bar and social hub Copas (Spanish for drinks). 

Staying in for the evening? Choose delivery by Gusta, a robot named for the Italian word for “enjoy,” who’ll bring a meal directly to the doorstep. 

Gusta is just one way technology is integrated throughout the community. Each apartment home comes equipped with complimentary Wi-Fi and Alexa devices to control lighting, temperature, window shades, and more. Residents use digital platforms to reserve tables, request valet service, or schedule housekeeping. Of course, you can always visit, call, or text the concierge, who will personally arrange services from pet care to travel notifications. 

Connection is encouraged through beautifully designed gathering spaces such as Kia Ora, a living-room lounge perfect for conversation, as well as a library stocked with books and periodicals. 

Much more than a place to live, The Mather is a place to define your path to aging well, discover new interests and live boldly. 

If you see yourself here, visit themathertysons.com.

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