Living

‘This is my family’

Partners of 39 years turn new page after surviving homelessness, alcoholism

Published

15 years ago

February 10, 2011

Terry Ward, 66, seated, and Bob Cyrus, 60, are celebrating this Valentine’s Day in a new home after an adventurous 39 years together. (Washington Blade photo by Michael Key)

Terry Ward, 66, and Bob Cyrus, 60, have been a couple for 39 years and like a comedy team from old-style vaudeville, each is a straight man to the other, setting each other up for one-liners, often in politically incorrect terms.

They nudge each other with constant ribbing, affectionately but sometimes there’s also a dab of vinegar with the sugar, as when Ward calls Cyrus “a whore,” even as they each tumble into well-practiced personality pratfalls.

Each can finish the other’s sentences and their patter can be hard to follow, unless you hear the inner nuance, which always seems to turn on being each other’s eternal best friend.

Until two weeks ago, they were homeless and living in a shelter. And for years they were hopelessly alcoholic, yet still they clung to each other for love and support.

One is largely deaf, the other is blind in one eye. They are real characters, scarred by life’s twists and turns yet they’re still able to find the fun in their life together even if they have to create it themselves. Ward, blind in his right eye since a stroke last year, says, “We’re never bored — he can’t hear and I’m blind and I’ll hide his hearing aid and he’ll hide my teeth.”

And on April 1 — yes, on April Fools, for they seem to delight in having fun with every part of life — they plan to be married. But that’s only if, says Ward, Cyrus will spring for an engagement ring.

They live in a rent-subsidized apartment in Washington obtained for them by a non-profit social service agency, the U.S. Veterans Initiative (USVI), when it was discovered one of them had been a veteran — Ward served two years in the U.S. Navy mostly on a destroyer in the Mediterranean — and they had been homeless, but had shaken off alcohol and now were ready to start their lives anew.

Speaking of Emily Button, who acts as their case worker in her capacity as the Initiative’s housing director, Ward says, “She’s more than a sweetheart, she’s a jewel.”

Button stepped in and pushed through all the paperwork to make sure in late January that Ward and Cyrus could move out of Clean and Sober, a shelter and alcohol rehabilitation center located at 2nd and E Streets, N.W., where Ward had been living for 22 months and Cyrus for 17 months, and into their own, neat-as-a-pin one-bedroom apartment where their lives are now all about starting over.

Ward can reminisce with a touch of sarcasm about how they met, in 1972, when Cyrus was only 21, and fresh out of Huntington, W.Va. He’d left there after finishing high school and came to Washington to take a clerk’s job in a city post office. Cyrus was already an alcoholic — he says he began to drink, mostly screwdrivers, as young as 13, at about the time he also realized he was gay. By 15 he knew he was hooked on booze because, he says, “It made me feel good.” By 21, he says the pattern was fixed in place — binge drinking followed by frequent blackouts and memory loss.

Ward remembers the rainy Friday night he met Cyrus. Ward was coming home from his job at the Market Inn restaurant. He stopped the cab he was in when he saw Cyrus incoherent and sprawled on his bicycle tilted into a gutter near 9th and Pennsylvania Avenue where water from a rainstorm was coursing all around him. Out of concern, Ward went to offer help, but Cyrus responded only to say, “Fuck you.”

“I was mean and nasty then,” Cyrus says. He admits he sometimes still is. Ward agrees: “He’s selfish because he was the only boy in the family.”

A year later they met again when both were working at the Channel Inn restaurant. They’d remembered their earlier meeting. Cyrus says they didn’t get along. Ward was out but says, “Cyrus wouldn’t admit for years that he was a homosexual,” even though he was having sex in West Virginia when he was 13.

Born in Portsmouth, Va., in 1944, Ward never saw his mother, because she “walked out of the hospital,” he says, the day he and his twin sister were born, and she never came back. Raised by an aunt he called mom he remembers being 8 and wearing his sister’s Brownie uniform to sell cookies door to door. He’d come home and be Jane in their childhood recreations of the “Tarzan” adventures they saw at the movies.

Sexually, the two always led different lives. They were sexually adventurous and are candid with tales from their glory days.

Somehow, though, the two stuck together through many ups and maybe many more downs. Despite their hedonism and alcohol abuse, they escaped HIV.

“Almost all our friends from then are dead now,” Cyrus says.

So what made it last?

“We’re the best of friends,” Ward says. “This is family and I love him. Can’t you love someone without sex? It’s probably why we’re still together because we don’t have sex. He does his thing and I do mine.”

The couple says they were never each other’s types sexually so they never consummated their relationship. It’s common, experts say, for long-term couples to no longer have sex after many years together but is it unusual for couples to have never had sex?

“I would kind of think so myself, but they may be affectionate in other ways,” says Michael Radkowsky, a local gay psychologist who counsels gay couples. He mentions singer Margaret Whiting who married gay porn star Jack Wrangler and had a non-sexual union.

“They just said they were great companions in every other way and wanted to spend their lives together,” Radkowsky says. “So it does happen and there’s no reason to pathologize it. If they’re happy, they’re happy and it works for them.”

As for their alcoholism, Ward had more control over the addiction, always able to keep a job, while Cyrus frequently would lose his. They hit bottom, respectively, especially when they fell on hard times after Ward sold his home and then gave the money to a son he’d fathered during a two-year marriage in the mid-‘60s. It became increasingly obvious that alcohol was a problem — they sometimes spent as much as $300 a week on liquor and bought it by the case.

Now Ward says, “I’m 66 and I’ve got a new life ahead of me,” saying that they have each dropped all their old drinking friends who typically would mostly spend their time together drinking.

“When you sober up, you learn to love yourself,” Ward says.

They continue to help each other. Cyrus, who was hearing impaired at birth and heard at “about 30 percent” now, relies on his partner’s ears. In addition to his vision problems, Ward uses a cane since a fall several years ago.

“Life itself, you just have to work at it,” Ward says. He looks over fondly at Cyrus and says, “At least with this one, I know what I’ve got, he’s my caretaker now – I’ve always been his caretaker, and now it’s my turn.”

“I love him from the bottom of my heart,” Ward says. “This is my family.”

Real Estate

2026: prices, pace, and winter weather

Lingering snow cover, sub-freezing temperatures have impacted area housing market

Published

9 hours ago

February 22, 2026

Valerie Blake

17th Street in Dupont Circle on Jan. 26, 2026, after 7" inches of snow and sleet fell in D.C. (Washington Blade photo by Michael K. Lavers)

The D.C. metropolitan area’s housing market remains both pricey and complex. Buyers and sellers are navigating not only high costs and shifting buyer preferences, but also seasonal weather conditions that influence construction, inventory, showings, and marketing time.

Seasonality has long affected the housing market across the U.S. Activity typically peaks in spring and summer and dips in winter; however, January and February 2026 brought unusually cold spells to our area, with extended freezing conditions.

Persistent snow and ice-covered roads and sidewalks have gone for days, and in some cases weeks, before melting. While snow accumulation normally averages only a few inches this time of year, this winter saw below-normal temperatures and lingering snow cover that has significantly disrupted normal activity.

Rather than relying on neighborhood teenagers to shovel snow to make some extra money, the “snowcrete” has required ice picks, Bobcats, and snow removal professionals to clear streets and alleys, free our cars from their parking spaces, and restore availability of mass transit.

These winter conditions have had an adverse impact on the regional housing market in several ways.

Construction slowdown: New builds and exterior improvements often pause during extended cold, resulting in delayed housing starts when we need affordable housing in the worst way.
Listing preparation: Cleaning crews, sign installers, photographers, and stagers with trucks full of furniture may be unable to navigate roads and need to postpone service.
Showings and open houses: Simply put, buyers are less inclined to schedule visits in hazardous conditions. Sellers must ensure walkways and parking areas are clear and de-iced and be able to vacate the property while viewings are taking place.
Inspection and appraisal delays: Like buyers and sellers, ancillary professionals may be delayed by unfavorable weather, slowing timelines from contract to close.
Maintenance and repairs: Properties with winter damage (e.g., ice dams or frozen pipes) may experience repair delays due to contractor availability and supply chain schedules. Snow and cold can also affect properties with older and more delicate systems adversely, leading some sellers to delay listing until better conditions arrive.
Availability of labor: Increasingly, construction, landscaping, and domestic workers are reluctant to come into the District, not because of ice, but because of ICE.

Overall, the District has shown a notable increase in days on the market compared with past years. Homes that once sold in a week or less are now often listed for 30+ days before obtaining an offer, especially in the condominium and mid-range house segments. While part of this shift can be attributed to weather and climate, interest rates, uncertain employment, temporary furloughs, and general economic conditions play key roles.

Nonetheless, we continue to host some of the region’s most expensive residences. Historic estates, including a Georgetown mansion that sold for around $28 million, anchor the luxury segment and reflect ongoing demand for premium urban property.

But even in this high-end housing sector, marketing strategies are evolving based on seasonal realities. Price reductions on unique or niche properties, such as undersized or unconventional homes, reflect a broader market adjustment where competitive pricing can shorten selling time.

For example, a beautifully renovated, 4-story brick home with garage parking and multiple decks that overlook the Georgetown waterfront sold in early February for 90 percent of the list price after 50 days on the market.

At the other end of the spectrum, a 2-bedroom investor-special rowhouse in Anacostia only took eight days to sell for under $200,000, down 14 percent from its original list price. In addition, four D.C. homes took more than 250 days to sell, including an 8-bedroom rooming house that was on the market for 688 days and closed after a 23 percent downward price adjustment.

Some frustrated sellers are simply taking their homes off the market rather than dropping prices below their mortgage balances, although we are beginning to see the resurgence of short sales for those who must sell.

Condominiums and cooperatives offer many opportunities for buyers and investors, with 1,100 of them currently on the market in D.C. alone. List prices run the gamut from $55,000 for a studio along the Southwest Waterfront to nearly $5 million for five bedrooms, four full baths, and 4,400 square feet at the Watergate.

So, while Washington metro area prices remain high, the pace of sales now reflects both seasonal and economic realities. Homes taking longer to sell, in part caused by elements of winter, signal a shifting market where buyers can take more time to decide which home to choose and have a better negotiating posture than in recent years.

Accordingly, sellers must continue to price strategically, primp and polish their homes, and prepare for additional adverse circumstances by reviewing fluctuating market conditions with their REALTOR® of choice.

Valerie M. Blake is a licensed Associate Broker in DC, MD & VA with RLAH @properties. Call or text her at (202) 246-8602, email her at [email protected] or follow her on Facebook at TheRealst8ofAffairs.

Autos

Going for gold: Ford Bronco Sport vs. Toyota RAV4

SUV world has share of bright lights, bold entrances, cut-throat competitors

Published

2 days ago

February 21, 2026

Joe Phillips

Ford Bronco Sport

Let the games begin! Just like the Winter Olympics this month, the SUV world has its share of bright lights, bold entrances, and cut-throat competitors.

Enter the Ford Bronco Sport and Toyota RAV4, both ready to claim the podium but each with a different routine. Think hiking boots versus minimalist trainers. Dirt trails versus perfectly paved roadways.

FORD BRONCO SPORT

$34,000

MPG: 25 city/30 highway

0 to 60 mph: 8.2 seconds

Cargo space: 32.5 cu. ft.

PROS: Boxy chic. Off-road ready. Easy-clean interior.

CONS: Meh gas mileage. Firm ride. Outside noise.

The Bronco Sport doesn’t try to blend in — and that’s the point. With an upright stance, squared lines and retro-rugged styling, this compact SUV looks ready for a backcountry photoshoot before you’ve even left the driveway.

Power comes from a three-cylinder turbo engine that handles daily driving with ease. Opt for the four-cylinder turbo, and the personality shifts from relaxed to assertive. Passing power improves. Highway merges are confident rather than cautious.

The standard 4×4 system sets the tone immediately. Traction is constant. Confidence is built in. Add the G.O.A.T. drive trains (in Ford cute-speak, this means “Goes Over Any Terrain”), and the Bronco Sport adapts to mud, sand, snow and rocks like a decathlete moving between events. Higher trims add skid plates, upgraded suspension and special hardware that makes rough territory feel less intimidating.

On pavement, the Bronco Sport is stable and composed, though the firm suspension can be ass-busting over deep potholes and such. And wind noise at highway speeds is kinda annoying, a tradeoff for the boxy profile.

Inside, durability meets thoughtful design. Rubberized surfaces and easy-clean materials welcome muddy boots, sandy paws or ambitious weekend projects. The cargo area features a flip-up rear window and adjustable floor, making it a breeze to load gear. Storage cubbies and nylon straps keep equipment organized without fuss.

Safety and other tech amenities are modern and practical. Wireless smartphone integration, cameras and driver-assistance gizmos such as adaptive cruise control make daily driving and long trips easier to manage.

What truly sets this SUV apart? In a sea of aerodynamic lemmings, the Bronco Sport feels like a free spirit. Rugged. Confident. A little rebellious.

And, like alpine skier Breezy Johnson, it looks particularly good with a bit of trail dust.

TOYOTA RAV4

$34,000

MPG: 47 city/40 highway

0 to 60 mph: 7.1 seconds

Cargo space: 37.8 cu. ft.

PROS: Fuel savvy. Spacious. Tech-laden features.

CONS: Less-sporty ride. Blasé base trim. Pricey options.

If the Bronco Sport is the adventurous wanderer, the Toyota RAV4 is the precision athlete who arrives early, stretches properly and performs effortlessly. Cue figure skaters Amber Glenn or Paul Poirier and you get the picture.

Fully redesigned for 2026, this compact SUV retains a formula that has made it one of the best-selling vehicles in America, blending efficiency, versatility and lots of tech features.

Toyota nixed the traditional gas engine for the RAV4, but that’s just fine. All models are now either standard hybrids, with fuel economy in the mid-40 mpg range, or plug-in hybrids, which can go up to 50 miles on battery power alone. The result: Vehicles that can handle daily commutes in near silence while retaining long-distance flexibility that would make an Olympic coach proud.

Acceleration is smooth and responsive, particularly in the plug-in hybrid, which is surprisingly quick. The transition between electric and gas power is seamless, though heavy throttle inputs mean the engine sometimes sounds strained. Handling is more predictable than sporty, so this was a minor deduction on the RAV4’s scorecard … at least from me.

But overall comfort is outstanding. The suspension absorbs potholes and uneven pavement with ease, and cabin noise remains impressively low at highway speeds. Long road trips feel relaxed rather than fatiguing — less triathlon grind, more victory lap.

Toyota’s Safety Sense offers adaptive cruise control, lane-keeping assist, enhanced collision avoidance and other systems that operate smoothly without seeming intrusive.

Inside, the revamped cabin is user-friendly. Materials are more refined than before, especially in mid- and upper-level trims. A large, high-resolution touchscreen supports the latest apps, voice commands and over-the-air updates. Such a layout is intuitive instead of flashy — stylish athleisure rather than couture.

Passenger space is generous, and cargo capacity remains among the most practical in this segment. The wide opening is especially helpful when tossing in luggage, sports equipment or an overly optimistic warehouse haul.

For drivers like me who are quick to judge efficiency, reliability and daily usability, the RAV4 delivered a gold-medal performance.

Real Estate

Home is where the heart is

Tying Valentine’s Day to LGBTQ buyers and sellers

Published

7 days ago

February 16, 2026

Scott Helms

(Photo by sundaemorning/Bigstock)

Valentine’s Day is often portrayed as a celebration of romantic love — flowers, chocolates, and candlelit dinners. But for many LGBTQ+ individuals and couples, Valentine’s Day can also be a moment to reflect on something deeper: the love that creates a safe, welcoming home.

For LGBTQ+ home buyers and sellers, homeownership is more than a financial milestone—it is an act of belonging, resilience, and pride. Owning a home can mean finally having a place where you can hold hands with your partner on the front porch, decorate with your authentic style, and build a life free from judgment. In this way, buying or selling a home is one of the most meaningful love stories many LGBTQ+ people will ever write.

This Valentine’s Day, whether you’re a first-time gay home buyer, a same-sex couple upgrading your space, or an LGBTQ+ seller moving on to your next chapter, it’s worth thinking about how love, identity, and real estate intersect—and how to navigate that journey with confidence, protection, and the right support.

Love, Identity, and the Meaning of ‘Home’

For generations, LGBTQ+ people were denied equal access to housing, homeownership, and legal protections. Even today, many LGBTQ+ home buyers still face subtle bias, uncomfortable interactions, or outright discrimination in the real estate process.

That’s why finding LGBTQ+ friendly real estate and an affirming gay friendly realtor or lesbian realtor matters so much. A home isn’t just a building—it’s a personal sanctuary. Working with LGBTQ+ real estate agents who understand your lived experience can make all the difference between a stressful transaction and a joyful one.

For over 30 years, GayRealEstate.com has been the leading gay real estate network, connecting LGBTQ+ home buyers and sellers with gay real estate agents, lesbian real estate agents, and LGBTQ+ friendly realtors who truly “get it.” Their mission has always been simple yet powerful: to ensure that every LGBTQ+ person has access to safe, respectful, and inclusive real estate services.

Finding Your Match: Choosing the Right LGBTQ+ Friendly Realtor

Much like dating, finding the right real estate agent is about compatibility, trust, and communication. Here are some key tips for choosing the best LGBTQ+ real estate representation:

Look for experience with LGBTQ+ clients. Search for a gay realtor near me or lesbian realtor near me through GayRealEstate.com, where agents are vetted for cultural competency and community commitment.
Ask about their experience with same-sex couple home buying. A strong agent should understand issues like joint ownership, legal protections, and financing considerations.
Choose someone who listens. You should feel safe sharing your priorities—whether that includes proximity to LGBTQ+ nightlife, affirming schools, or lesbian-friendly neighborhoods.
Prioritize respect and transparency. Your agent should advocate for you, not just push a quick sale.

The right gay friendly real estate agent isn’t just helping you buy a house—they’re helping you find a place to build your life.

Best Cities for LGBTQ+ Home Buyers

If love is your compass, location is your map. Some of the best cities for LGBTQ+ home buyers consistently offer strong community presence, legal protections, and welcoming neighborhoods:

Wilton Manors, Florida – A hub for LGBTQ+ culture with thriving LGBTQ+ real estate opportunities
Palm Springs, California – A long-standing LGBTQ+ retirement and second-home destination
Provincetown, Massachusetts – Historic LGBTQ+ community with progressive housing protections
Asheville, North Carolina – Growing market with inclusive real estate services
Fort Lauderdale, Florida – Diverse, welcoming, and highly sought-after for LGBTQ+ home ownership

Working with GayRealEstate.com allows you to connect with local LGBTQ+ real estate experts who know these markets inside and out.

Navigating Legal Protections in LGBTQ+ Real Estate

Love is universal—but legal protections are not always consistent. Understanding your rights is essential when buying or selling a home as an LGBTQ+ person.

Key protections include:

Fair Housing Act (FHA): Prohibits discrimination based on sex, which courts have increasingly interpreted to include sexual orientation and gender identity.
State and local protections: Many cities and states offer additional safeguards against LGBTQ+ housing discrimination.
Same-sex couple legal considerations: If you are married, joint ownership is typically straightforward. If not, consult an attorney about co-ownership agreements.

A knowledgeable LGBTQ+ friendly realtor from GayRealEstate.com can help guide you through these complexities and connect you with trusted legal professionals when needed.

Buying a Home as an LGBTQ+ Person: Practical Tips

If you’re embarking on your home-buying journey this Valentine’s season, here are smart, practical steps to take:

Clarify your priorities. Do you want a vibrant LGBTQ+ neighborhood, quiet suburbs, or access to queer community spaces?
Get pre-approved for a mortgage. This strengthens your position in competitive markets.
Work with an LGBTQ+ real estate agent. Searching “finding a gay real estate agent” or “finding a lesbian real estate agent” through GayRealEstate.com is a great first step.
Research inclusive communities. Some neighborhoods are more welcoming than others.
Know your rights. If you experience bias, document it and seek legal guidance.

Buying a home is an act of self-love—and community love.

Selling a Home as an LGBTQ+ Person

Selling can be just as emotional as buying, especially if your home represents years of memories with your partner, friends, or chosen family.

When selling a home as an LGBTQ+ person, consider:

Working with a gay friendly realtor who will market your home inclusively
Highlighting LGBTQ+ community appeal in listings
Being prepared for potential buyer bias (and knowing how to respond)
Leaning on GayRealEstate.com’s LGBTQ+ real estate services for trusted guidance

Your story—and your home—deserve respect.

Real Estate for LGBTQ+ Families

More LGBTQ+ couples are raising children, fostering, or building blended families. This makes homeownership even more meaningful.

When searching for real estate for LGBTQ+ families, consider:

LGBTQ+ affirming school districts
Family-friendly queer communities
Safe neighborhoods with inclusive values
Access to LGBTQ+ resources and social networks

GayRealEstate.com specializes in helping LGBTQ+ families find homes that truly fit their lives.

Love, Pride, and Homeownership

At its core, Valentine’s Day is about connection. For LGBTQ+ people, homeownership can be one of the most profound expressions of love—love for yourself, your partner, your family, and your future.

Whether you are a first-time gay home buyer, a same-sex couple relocating, or an LGBTQ+ seller moving forward, you deserve an experience rooted in dignity, fairness, and celebration.

For over three decades, GayRealEstate.com has stood as the leading source for LGBTQ+ real estate, gay real estate, lesbian real estate, and LGBTQ+ home buying and selling representation. Their nationwide network of gay real estate agents, lesbian-friendly real estate agents, and LGBTQ+ friendly realtors ensures that your real estate journey is guided by professionals who understand your heart—and your home.

This Valentine’s Day, let your next chapter be written in a place where you can truly belong. Because when love leads the way, home is never far behind.

Scott Helms is president and owner of Gayrealestate.com.