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You don’t have to go far to get away

Richmond, Philly, Rehoboth, Lost River make for memorable regional getaways

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Richmond rolls out the rainbow carpet

The Richmond Convention & Visitors Bureau — like those of many mid-size cities — has put a lot of effort into enticing the lavender dollar. Virginia may be one of the most anti-gay states legislatively, but Richmond is rolling out the rainbow carpet and has much to offer the discerning gay traveler.

For starters, it’s only two hours from Washington. And taking a comfortable round-trip Amtrak ride from Union Station runs about $50.

LGBT travelers are especially welcome at the Linden Row Inn as well as Maury Place at Monument bed and breakfast.

Linden Row Inn (Blade photo by Michael Key)

The Linden Row Inn offers spacious rooms filled with ornate antiques from the mid-to-late 1800s. The fully restored Greek revival hotel is conveniently located in the center of historic downtown Richmond. Prices range from around $110 per night for a sprawling, well-decorated two-bedroom to around $240 per night for a gracious parlor room. For more information or to reserve a room, go to lindenrowinn.com.

Maury Place (Blade photo by Michael Key)

The gay-owned Maury Place at Monument bed and breakfast offers an intimate setting with meticulous attention to design. The luxury guesthouse boasts a seasonal swimming pool, four suites with sumptuous decor, heated tile floors in the bathrooms and a welcoming-yet-unobtrusive staff. Prices range from around $190 to $290 per night. Go to mauryplace.com to book a room.

There are many great restaurants in Richmond, but Chez Fouchee and the Empress stand out.

Chez Fouchee, a gay-owned restaurant nestled between downtown and the Broad Street arts district, has an affordable-yet-satisfying lunch menu seven days a week and a fine dining dinner on Fridays and Saturdays. For lunch, try an artisan baguette sandwich, the quiche du jour or one of the original salads. Prices range from $7.50 for a baguette or salad to $13.50 for a lunch steak. For the more formal dinner, be prepared to spend more than $20 per entrée. Save room for dessert; the rich lemon butter cake is worth the extra trip to the gym. For menus, reservations and more information, go to chezfoushee.com.

The Empress serves elegant cuisine that any foodie will love. The cozy lesbian-owned restaurant offers scintillating and innovative dishes ranging from bison lasagna to pistachio crusted duck breast. Vegetarian options round out the menu. Prices for entrées range from $10 to $15 and market price for seafood. The Empress serves breakfast and lunch Mondays through Fridays and dinner Tuesdays through Sundays with a brunch on Sundays. Go to theempressrva.com for more information.

There are many things to do in Richmond, and plenty to perk the interest of the LGBT traveler looking for art, history and nightlife.

The Virginia Museum of Fine Arts (Blade photo by Michael Key)

The Virginia Museum of Fine Arts is a major attraction for travelers and Richmond residents alike. The glass and stone museum holds 23,000 works of art in its permanent collection and is host to world-class special exhibitions. Go to vmfa.museum for information on exhibits, food, events and more.

The River City is home to several theater companies with shows ranging from the classics to the avant garde. Of special interest to a gay audience is Richmond Triangle Players, an LGBT theater company. James Edwin Parker’s gay-themed “2 Boys in a Bed on a Cold Winter’s Night” is having its Virginia premiere on Thursday and will run through Feb. 4. Go to rtriangle.org for tickets, show times and more information on the company.

Drag cabaret at Godfrey's Restaurant and Nightclub in Richmond. (Blade photo by Michael Key)

To unwind after a long day of exploring, there are many LGBT nightlife destinations. For an action-packed nightlife experience, go to Nations on West Broad Street. The club has two bars, a large dance floor and a drag cabaret. For a more laid back experience, Barcode on East Grace Street offers a friendly atmosphere complete with lunch and dinner specials. The best place to meet women is Babes of Carytown located on West Cary Street. Babes is welcoming to everyone and features live music and a drag show. Godfrey’s Restaurant and Nightclub on East Grace Street transforms from a lively dance club at night to a fun drag brunch on Sunday mornings. Reservations are required for the drag brunch.

There’s an LGBT section at visitrichmondva.com that’s a must-visit site if you plan to go.

MICHAEL KEY

Flowers, photos and more in Philly

As one of the country’s largest metro areas, Philadelphia is always bustling with gay energy but two spring attractions are especially worth noting — lesbian photographer Zoe Strauss has a major exhibit at the Philadelphia Museum of Art that runs through April 22. And time your visit right and you can also catch the Philadelphia International Flower Show slated for March 4-11.

One of the major exhibits at last year’s Philadelphia Flower Show (Photo courtesy Pennsylvania Horticultural Society)

The latter, a tradition since 1829 that now draws about 250,000 visitors each year, is “a fantastic show for anybody interested in flowers, plants and greening but anybody can enjoy it,” says Alan Jaffe, PR manager for the Pennsylvania Horticultural Society, which stages the event each year.

This year’s theme is “Hawaii: Islands of Aloha” so expect the usual eye-popping displays built around an exotic theme. LGBT Night Out is March 5 from 6 to 8:30 p.m. and the event always draws plenty of gays including exhibitors, designers, landscape architects and more.

The event is at the Pennsylvania Convention Center (12th and Arch Streets). Visit theflowershow.com for details.

Strauss (Photo courtesy Philadelphia Museum of Art)

Strauss is an unlikely success story. The former babysitter with no formal training in photography launched a 10-year project to display her work for one day each year underneath Interstate 95 in South Philadelphia (she’s a Philly native). Critical acclaim came in time and now she’s the subject of a major exhibition that launched two weeks ago and features several special events as well as 39 donated billboard displays featuring her photos through the spring.

The 41-year-old Strauss, who lives with her wife Lynn Bloom in South Philly, says her lesbian identity is endlessly informing of her work even in non-obvious ways.

“It’s extremely central to it because I’m a lesbian and my work is very personal so it’s central to everything I make whether it’s presented in that moment or not,” she says. “I’m very interested in gender and the fluidity of it, so it’s of great importance to my overall body of work,” she says. “And even if (a particular image) is not directly related to the LGBT community, it still kind of always is because I’m the one making it.”

The Museum is on the Benjamin Franklin Parkway at 26th Street. Visit philamuseum.org for details.

JOEY DiGUGLIELMO

Rehoboth’s off-season appeal

Before the summer rush, there are loads of activities that Washington’s LGBT community will find enticing in Rehoboth Beach, Del.

You can see men in skimpy swim trunks or elaborate costumes plunge into the cold Atlantic Ocean on Feb. 5 in a benefit for Special Olympics Delaware, and a week later, on Feb. 11, you can shop at the Convention Center at the state’s largest indoor garage sale, Merchant’s Attic I. Merchant’s Attic II is scheduled for St. Patrick’s Day.

The Blue Moon reopens Feb. 9, and judging by the dumpsters outside the Moon this winter, there are many upgrades awaiting inside.

Washington’s own Gay Men’s Chorus will join with the CAMP Rehoboth Chorus in concert on Feb. 11 at 7 p.m.

The President’s Day weekend traditionally has CAMP Rehoboth co-sponsor a mini film festival called “Another Take” with the Rehoboth Beach Film Society. This year, the films are the award-winning “Beginners” (Feb. 18), and the Chely Wright documentary, “Wish Me Away” (Feb. 19). Both begin at 2 p.m. and are shown upstairs at the Movies at Midway.

March 3 brings another Rehoboth tradition, as the Convention Center will be filled with the smell of chocolate at the annual Chocolate Festival. March will end with another Convention Center tradition, now in its 15th year, the Resorts Home Expo, showcasing the top home service companies, developers, Realtors and mortgage firms (March 31-April 1).

Camp Rehoboth holds a Women’s Fest each April, this year from April 12-15, and will feature Col. Grethe Cammermeyer and Suzanne Westenhoefer among others.

If you have a summer residence at the beach or are thinking of owning a place, you’ll want to want to check out the Designer Show House (10 Fourth Street) on Fridays through Sundays April 20-May 6.  For the odds and ends that you must have, the very popular annual Spring Sidewalk Sale will be held May 18-20. And do not forget that the second Saturday of each month throughout the year the arts community holds the Mosaic Art Walk.

If you are looking for pure entertainment, most of the bars and restaurants continue to offer specials during the winter and spring and there are theater options at both Clear Space in Rehoboth and Possum Point in Georgetown, or you might want to check out the expanded Proud! Bookstore, which has moved directly across from its former location at Village by the Sea, on the Baltimore Avenue side.

PETER SCHOTT

Big change in Lost River

If you’re more into mountains than beaches, then consider visiting Lost River, W.Va. Curl up with a good book by the fire, enjoy a robust cabernet with friends at the Guesthouse, or go for a brisk winter hike.

After 30 years in business, the gay-owned Guesthouse at Lost River changed ownership earlier this month. New owners Michael Cooley and Gary Robinson promise to continue the gay-friendly traditions of the Guesthouse. They are currently featuring a winter craft beer selection from Frederick’s Flying Dog Brewery in the lounge. The Guesthouse also offers wedding packages and can supply couples with photographers, DJs and everything to make the celebration of your wedding or commitment ceremony memorable. Visit guesthouselostriver.com for more information.

 

 

 

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Real Estate

In real estate, trust the process

With rates coming down, we could see spring surge in buyers

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(Photo by zimmytws/Bigstock)

The average 30-year mortgage rate is falling, little by slowly. With predictions that the rate will continue to adjust downward in the next year or two, there may be a busier spring market than we have seen in the last few year, especially for the DMV market, which has been reeling from thousands of layoffs this past year.  The frenzied activity resulting from interest rates close to 3% for some borrowers will probably not occur; however, this spring could add up to be a few notches busier than the last. 

What does this mean for buyers and sellers? Lender Tina Del Casale with Waterstone Mortgage says she has seen “low to mid 6’s as the average for conventional loans.” If rates continue downward into the 5% range, there may be more activity than we saw in the last year or two. This could release a little bit of pent up demand.  

Many buyers will have found that for whatever reason, their current home is not meeting their needs. Sellers may want to finally take the plunge and put a for sale sign in the yard and online, now that they might find a more reasonable rate on their next home. This winter can be an opportunity to assess financial situations, home conditions, and optimize one’s chances to have a sale with more agreeable terms, or put one’s best foot forward in an offer. In addition to checking with a lender or favorite handy person, let’s review what sellers and buyers typically spend their energy negotiating while enjoying the lovely process called “going under contract”:

  • Timelines – Sellers might want to have their house solidly under contract (papers signed, thumbs up from the lenders, all inspection items decided upon and settled) so that they can put an offer down on a new home, and then negotiate that timeline with the other sellers.  Remember, making a move is not only about the buyer taking possession of a new home, but also about the sellers figuring out their situation as well. 
  • Sale Price – unfortunately for buyers, in the eyes of most sellers, “money talks.”  So, in a non-competitive situation, a seller might be happy to just get one offer at a price that was within the desired range. As soon as another interested buyer enters the equation, it can become a little bit like RuPaul’s Drag Race, and one will have to lip sync for one’s life, honey! And only one buyer will get to hear the words, condragulations!”
  • Tone/Vibes/Energy in the Room – Remember:  Human beings are emotional creatures. All of us have feelings. And all of us want to put energy into situations where we feel appreciated, where a level of self-awareness exists, and a sense that each side is trying one’s hardest to act in good faith.   The best transactions I saw were where a little grace was the “grease on the wheels” of the transaction.  Occasionally, a buyer had cold feet and wanted to see the unit a few more times before the settlement date, or a seller forgot to scrub the bathroom with a little extra elbow grease before the settlement date.  Life happens; misunderstandings can occur. A wise therapist once said: “You don’t have to like it, but can you allow it?” The tone of one or both parties in the transaction can be what seals the deal, or results in one party exiting the contract. (In the case of the dirty bathroom, the seller left a check with the title company for the buyer to pay a housekeeper to come clean what they couldn’t.) 


Joseph Hudson is a referral agent with Metro Referrals. He can be reached at 703-587-0597 or [email protected].

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Real Estate

Signs you’ve outgrown self-management of your D.C. rental

Keeping up with local regulations is a struggle

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(Photo by zimmytws/Bigstock)

According to rental market statistics from RentCafe, Washington, D.C.,  remains at the top of the most popular cities for rental properties.  With a strong rental market and a growing population, success should be second nature to real estate investors and rental property owners in this area. 

As a self-manager of your own rental, if you’re not enjoying the profitability and the earnings that this market can provide, it might be time to look for professional management. 

There are certain signs that show property owners have outgrown self-management. We’re exploring those today, and inviting DIY landlords to consider the benefits that come with a partnership with a professional property management company in Washington, D.C.

Washington, D.C., is known for having a complex and ever-changing regulatory environment. There are strict tenant rights, rent control laws, and specific rules related to property maintenance such as mold, lead based paint hazards, among others. The Rental Housing Act of 1985 is strictly enforced, and under this program, there are specific rules regarding rent adjustments, dispute resolution, and eviction protections. 

Fair housing laws need complete compliance, security deposits have strict timelines, and habitability standards are in place to ensure tenants are living in a home that’s safe and well-maintained.

Staying on top of these rules can be time-consuming and difficult. Violating even a small regulation unintentionally can result in fines or legal action. It’s critical to stay compliant, and if you find yourself struggling to keep up with the evolving laws and regulations, it’s a clear sign that you may need professional help. Property managers can reduce the risk and liability of making a legal mistake.

Financial Returns are Underwhelming

A lot of self-managing landlords choose to lease, manage, and maintain their own properties because they don’t want to pay a management fee. We get it. Keeping more of your money seems like the best way to increase profitability. 

But, here’s the reality of it: property managers can help you earn more and spend less on your investment, increasing your earnings and your ROI. In fact, a good property manager can often earn enough additional net revenue for the owner to pay for that fee over a year. 

Property managers are experienced at maximizing the financial performance of rental properties. We can help: 

  • Optimize rental income
  • Reduce vacancy rates
  • Lower maintenance costs through established vendor relationships
  • Recommend improvements for higher values

Ultimately, a good property manager will ensure that your property is being run efficiently. We will use our expertise to ensure your property is earning what it should. 

Maintenance and Repairs Are Taking Up Too Much Time

Maintenance challenges are not unique to self-managing rental property owners. We deal with them, too, as professional property managers. We respond to plumbing issues and appliance malfunctions, we take calls in the middle of the night when a sewer is backing up, and we work hard to protect properties against deterioration and general wear and tear.

This can be overwhelming, especially when it comes to finding vendors and service professionals that are both affordable and provide quality service. Plumbers, electricians, HVAC technicians, and even landscapers and cleaners are in high demand in Washington, D.C. But maintenance at your rental property cannot wait.  It’s essential to the value and condition of your investment as well as to the product you are selling.

It’s time to work with a professional property manager if you’re having trouble finding vendors or if you’re struggling to keep up with maintenance requests. We have systems for emergency responses, routine repairs, and preventative services. 

Tenant Screening Is Becoming More Difficult and Time-Consuming

Finding good tenants is one of the most critical aspects of rental property management. But in our home of Washington, D.C. we have one of the most regulated rental markets in the country. The tenant screening process has become increasingly complex, highly restricted, and time-intensive.

Many property owners are surprised to learn that there are more limitations than ever on what can be screened, what information can be used in making a decision whom to rent to, and how screening decisions must be documented. Federal and local laws tightly regulate the use of credit histories, criminal background records, income verification, and even eviction records. Staying compliant is not optional. Failure to follow these rules can open the door to discrimination claims, administrative complaints, substantial fines, or even lawsuits.

That’s why rushing or relying on outdated methods can easily result in selecting the wrong resident or worse, unintentionally violating DC’s Human Rights Act or federal Fair Housing laws.

Problematic tenants often become evident only after move-in: lease breaks, chronic late payments, noise complaints, and property damage. When these patterns appear repeatedly, it is often a sign that the screening process is not sufficiently structured.

Why Professional Screening Matters

Professional property managers have systems in place to perform thorough, legally compliant screening while avoiding oversteps that could violate the regulations. Professional property managers use trusted screening platforms and follow written processes that keep owners protected and ensure fairness for applicants.

Columbia Property Management’s screening process includes:

  • Credit Report Review
     Evaluating credit patterns, payment reliability, and debt load while complying with restrictions on how data can be used.
  • Rental History Verification
    Contacting prior landlords and reviewing national eviction databases—keeping in mind that some jurisdictions like the District of Columbia limit how far back eviction data can be seen, must less considered.
  • Background ChecksReviewing public records in a manner consistent with DC’s Human Rights Act and federal guidance on criminal history usage. Not all criminal records can be considered in rental decisions, and timing rules often apply.
  • Income & Employment Verification
    Confirming applicants can afford the rent and other monthly expenses based on their income, without ruling out certain income in a discriminatory way (e.g., vouchers, subsidies, or lawful alternative forms of income). There are many intentional steps conducted by professional property managers under a framework that ensures decisions are based on objective criteria, applied consistently, and fully aligned with the latest federal and DC regulations.

Your Property Is Sitting Vacant for Longer Periods

While current rental market dynamics are starting to show the effects of federal workforce layoffs and the worsening local economy, the vacancy rate in Washington, D.C.,  is relatively low, compared to the national average. According to a news report from WTOP, the local vacancy rate is just 6%, and there are an average of seven applications for every available rental unit. 

A vacant rental property can quickly become a financial drain. Whether you own a condo near Dupont Circle or a single-family home in one of Capitol Hill’s neighborhoods, every day your property sits empty means lost income. While the D.C. market is generally competitive, the reality is that there are always fluctuations in demand based on seasons, neighborhood desirability, and even economic trends. 

If you’re struggling to fill your rental quickly, it might be a sign that you need to re-evaluate your approach. An experienced property management company has a marketing strategy in place to keep vacancy periods as short as possible. From professional photos and listings to leveraging established networks, they can help ensure that your property is rented quickly, reducing the amount of time it sits vacant.

While managing a rental property in Washington, D.C., can be rewarding, it’s also challenging. As your property portfolio grows or the demands of your life or the demands of being a landlord increase, it’s helpful to recognize when it’s time to step back and let a professional handle the day-to-day tasks.

From navigating complex local regulations to ensuring your property remains occupied and well-maintained, there are many reasons why rental property owners in Washington, D.C., outgrow self-management. If any of these signs resonate with you, consider partnering with a property management company like ours to ensure that your rental investment continues to thrive without the stress and burnout of self-management.

We’d love to be your Washington, D.C., property management partner and resource. Please contact us at 888-857-6594 or ColumbiaPM.com


Scott Bloom is owner and Senior Property Manager, Columbia Property Management.

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Advice

My federal worker husband is depressed and I don’t know how to help

I feel like he’s dragging me into his hopelessness

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(Photo by wombatzaa/Bigstock)

Dear Michael,

My husband is a federal worker. Many of his colleagues took “the fork” or have been fired. So work has been overwhelming. He usually works late. The morale in his office is terrible. His paycheck disappeared with the shutdown although due to the specifics of his job, he still had to go in. He’s gotten increasingly depressed, irritable, and short-tempered.

I met Jason 20 years ago when we were young, and one of the things that made me fall in love with him was his idealism. He came to Washington because he wanted to contribute to the well-being of our country.

When I look at him now, it’s like he’s been through the wringer. He’s lost his idealism, feels unappreciated by our country, and is becoming bitter.

He never wants to go out with friends. Either he doesn’t want to hear them complain about the same sorts of things he’s experiencing, or he doesn’t want to have to interact with people who are doing just fine, job-wise. 

He also doesn’t feel like going out, just the two of us. So we’re home a lot. But we’re not spending time together when we’re at home. He’s surfing the internet, doom-scrolling, or playing video games.

I can’t get him to talk to me; he says, “I don’t want to talk about anything, it just makes me feel worse.” I can’t get him to do anything that might help him feel better. He doesn’t want to cook dinner with me, he doesn’t want to eat any of his favorite foods that I make for him, he won’t go for a walk with our dog (exercise is supposed to help mood, right?). 

I’m really worried about him. Clearly, he’s depressed, and nothing I am trying is helping him to feel better.

But in addition, I am starting to get annoyed. How much more can I try to do things for him that he doesn’t respond to and doesn’t appreciate?

I’ve been OK through this long slog, so far, but now I feel like I am being sucked into his depression and hopelessness. I’m starting to feel like giving up. I’m lonely and I miss my husband and I am despairing that he’s ever really going to come back.

In short, now I hate my life, too.

I’m not going anywhere but I am worried that my main feeling toward him is starting to be apathy. Is there something I can do to help him that I haven’t thought of? 

Michael replies:

I’m sorry, this is such a rough time. 

It’s understandable that when someone you love is suffering and feeling miserable, you might at times get fed up and feel like pulling away.

There’s a great saying by an ancient Jewish sage, Rabbi Tarfon: While you can’t fix the whole world, that doesn’t mean you should give up and do nothing to help.  

I thought of that saying as I read your letter, because while you can’t get Jason to change his mood or take action on his own behalf, you may have some ability to help him.

Similarly, while you can’t have a fantastic time in life when your husband is in a miserable place, you can take care of yourself and likely have a better life than you are having at present.

For starters, I encourage you to keep reminding yourself that this is without doubt one of the hardest periods of your husband’s life. So it’s a very good idea to have an open heart and a lot of compassion for Jason, as much of the time as you can. This won’t be easy. Strive to keep in mind that getting angry at Jason or frustrated with him won’t help. 

Don’t try to insist that Jason do anything. Often, when we push someone to do something that they don’t want to do, this just results in their digging in more. People generally don’t like to be nagged.

Of course you can ask Jason if he’d like to join you for a walk, or an outing, but tread carefully. You can advocate for what you’d like, but Jason gets to decide what he wants to do. 

You can certainly ask Jason what he would like from you, especially when he’s complaining. I love the “3 H’s” concept: Would he like you to hear (simply listen)? Would he like help (advice on what to do)? Or would he just like a hug

The best message you can send to Jason, by your presence and by an ongoing loving stance, is “I am here. You’re not alone.” Even when he wants to stay in the basement playing video games. You’re not criticizing him and you’re not judging him. Maybe you’re baking some cookies you both like and leaving him a plateful to eat if and when he wants to. (Be sure to treat yourself to some, as well.) 

In terms of bigger interventions, you can suggest that Jason meet with a therapist, or meet with his physician to discuss the possibility of an antidepressant to help him through this awful period. For example, you might have a sincere conversation where you say something like this:

“I’m worried about you. I really want to encourage you to get some help. My love for you can only go so far, and while I’m not going anywhere, I’d like you to take seriously how miserable you are. I’m here to encourage you that maybe you could feel better, even though your circumstances are terrible and you feel disillusioned.”

Again, trying to convince or force Jason to take action will likely go nowhere useful.

Now let’s focus on you. Living with a depressed spouse can be a miserable, soul-crushing experience. As you described, you’re watching the person you love suffer, and you’re pretty much losing your partner in so many of the things that make life enjoyable. 

Part of getting through this is to acknowledge that there is a limit to what you can do for Jason. And part of it is to strengthen your commitment to self-care. Taking care of yourself may keep you from going too far into misery or resentment. He doesn’t want to get together with a friend? Consider going anyway, and do your best to have at least a good time. Same thing with a dog walk, a good meal, or sitting down to watch a movie you’d like to see. You might also consider meeting with a therapist for ongoing support and strategizing. 

While this period of your life is gruelingly difficult, try to remember that it likely will come to an end, that there will likely be good times ahead for you and for Jason, and that in the meantime, doing your best to find ways to take care of yourself while also being a supportive and loving spouse will help you to survive. 

Michael Radkowsky, Psy.D. is a licensed psychologist who works with couples and individuals in D.C. He can be found online at michaelradkowsky.com. All identifying information has been changed for reasons of confidentiality. Have a question? Send it to [email protected].

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