Arts & Entertainment
Raising trans children
Parents with gender non-conforming kids share their stories
āTransitions of the Heartā
Edited by Rachel Pepper, foreword by Kim Pearson
Cleis Press
$16.95
224 pages
Itās hard to imagine or understand the feelings of confusion or isolation that come when a young son says heās really a girl or a daughter swears sheās a boy trapped in the wrong body. In the new book āTransitions of the Heart,ā edited by Rachel Pepper, mothers faced with those dilemmas share how they cope.
Even though itās a problem most parents never face, itās interesting to hear how those who have addressed it. Several say it involved a transition for both the child and parent. They write of gradually realizing their daughter isnāt just a tomboy or their son wasnāt ājust going through a phase.ā More than one mother admits that she knew her child was different when she was firmly corrected on pronouns and clothing choice.
Many women felt relief and were astonished when they realized that as their children were allowed to openly express their true genders, they were seeing their sons or daughters happy for the first time. As the stories unfold, itās especially poignant when this joy has followed suicide attempts.
Still, itās āa process.ā More than one mother has hoped her child might have a change of heart. There are rants in this book, heartbreak and pain. There are moms who canāt believe this happened and in some cases, it happened more than once in the same immediate family.
And yet, most of the women in this book admit that theyāve come to respect their children and the difficult things theyāve done. For one mom, heās āsomeone I would not have missed knowing for anything in the world.ā
And from another, to her child: āā¦ Iāll always love you.ā
Sometimes, the āTā in āLGBTā seems to hide behind its fellow letters. Your friends and family might not even know what it stands for, but āTransitions of the Heartā explains in a gentle, celebratory way.
Thatās a very useful beacon for anyone who feels isolated as their transgender child begins to embrace who (s)he is. But itās also important, I think, that editor Rachel Pepper includes stories that arenāt so rosy mixed with the stories of acceptance and encouragement. That added a stronger, more authentic message to this book and quashed the Pollyanna-ish tone it mightāve had otherwise.
But itās not just for parents of trans children. There are useful lessons about acceptance and unconditional love that will resonate with many parents, gay or straight.
Out & About
Blade to mark 55 years, celebrate Best Of LGBTQ DC
The Washington Blade will celebrate 55 years of delivering LGBTQ news and also the best LGBTQ things in the city on Thursday, Oct. 17 at 7 p.m. at Crush Bar.
First drink courtesy of Absolut. Must be 21 to attend and the eventās sponsors are ABSOLUT, Crush, and Infinite Legacy.
Tickets start at $10 and can be purchased at bestoflgbtqdc.com.
The Upper Chesapeake Bay Pride Foundation is hosting a series of October events, starting with a free documentary, āThe New Black,ā on Oct. 15 at 5:30 p.m. at Branch Towson University in Bel Air, Md. Admission is free; visit ucbpride.com for details and to reserve a spot. There will also be a family-friendly Sunday stroll on Oct. 20, 5-6 p.m. at North Park Loop Trail; meet at the Lock House at 817 Conesteo St. in Havre de Grace, Md.Ā
Theater
A contemporary take on āRomeo and Julietā at Folger
Creating a world that appeals to young audiences
āRomeo and Julietā
Through November 10
Folger Theatre
201 East Capitol St. S.E., Washington, D.C.
$20-$84
Folger.edu
In out director Raymond O. Caldwellās production of āRomeo and Julietā currently playing at Folger Theatre, the Capulet family are Puerto Rican except for Lord Capulet (Todd Scoffield) who is white with a Southern accent.
Fran Tapia (Lady Capulet), Luz Nicolas (Nurse), and Caro Reyes Rivera (Juliet) all speak Spanish when they are together. Rosa Garay LĆ³pez (Translator and Interpreter) translated certain scenes into Spanish. The Montagues are played by a cast of multiracial and multiethnic actors.
Tapia, a Helen Hayes Award-winning actor, identifies as part of the LGBTQ community. She says, “I am Chilean, Latina, queer and a proud immigrant.”
After receiving her acting degree in Santiago de Chile, Catholic University, Tapia started working professionally as an actor and a dancer with contemporary dance companies.
The newly single actor has been living in D.C. since 2019 and plans to remain based here. Recently, she shared her experiences playing Julietās mother in Shakespeareās story of the star-crossed lovers, a play she first read as a girl in Santiago.
WASHINGTON BLADE: Typically, Lady Capulet is portrayed as detached, a woman who canāt even remember her daughterās age. Whatās your spin on the Capulet matriarch?
FRAN TAPIA: From what Iāve read and seen, including productions and films, sheās a woman who has distanced herself from her daughter.
I see the part differently. I want to make it special, to get away from the hard mother. She does care about her husband and daughter. Her expectations are shaped by society more than anything, she has conservative goals, but that doesnāt mean that she doesnāt love her daughter.
BLADE: What else about your Lady Capulet is unique?
TAPIA: First of all, sheās Puerto Rican. She speaks in Spanish and English. She loves to sing. Sheās a party girl. Sheās a devoted wife and partner in crime with Lord Capulet, sharing both his ambition and devotion to family.
Lady Capulet wants to look pretty and she loves money. And she wants to be blonde, of course. I wear 26-inch blonde extensions for the part. Iām giving so much drama to it. Itās fun and dramatic and over the top.
She can share secrets with the Nurse played by Luz [Nicolas]. There are nuances with how she speaks to her. Lady Capulet speaks English when she wants to be formal. Luz brings the comedy. Sheās also, a very good dramatic actress.
BLADE: Itās a contemporary take on the Bardās masterpiece.
TAPIA: Itās super contemporary. Raymond [Caldwell] is looking to create a world that appeals to young audiences. Heās working with so many designers doing projection, lighting, and sound. There are so many surprises for you.
BLADE: Am I right in guessing itās not set in Verona.
TAPIA: Itās set in a fictionalized Washington, D.C., inspired by the election year. The Capulets are a conservative political family based on nobody in particular. Theyāre struggling for power through the marriage of their daughter. Unlike the source material, theyāre not trying to marry off a teenager. Itās more about preserving a legacy. Thatās scary to lose when youāre used to having it.
BLADE: How is working with Raymond? Iāve heard so many good things about him.
TAPIA: Prior to joining the cast, Iād heard from friends that he was good, but I had no idea how good. When I got this part, I gave myself the opportunity to offer my resources like singing. And heās been super receptive.
Raymond is very clear and bold. Lady Capulet has problems with addiction more intense than I imagined. I wonāt specify but weāre diving into all of that. There are so many kinds of addiction including social media for instance. In real life, Iām addicted to Diet Coke as anyone in the cast can tell you.
BLADE: Is Lady Capulet a part youāve longed to play?
TAPIA: Not really, but under the direction of Raymond Iām loving every second of it. His view of things has given me a lot of freedom that I didnāt expect.
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