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Md. couples obtaining marriage licenses with little difficulty

Confusion remains around tax, other issues as Jan. 1 nears

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Dale Knight, Jeff Arney, gay marriage, same sex marriage, marriage equality, Maryland, gay news, Washington Blade
Dale Knight, Jeff Arney, gay marriage, same sex marriage, marriage equality, Maryland, gay news, Washington Blade

Dale Knight and Jeff Arney of Ellicott City were the first gay couple to obtain a marriage license in Howard County. (Photo courtesy of Dale Knight)

With less than three weeks until Maryland’s same-sex marriage law takes effect, gay and lesbian couples continue to apply for marriage licenses across the state.

Eighteen of Maryland’s 23 circuit courts began accepting applications for same-sex marriage licenses on Dec. 6; the same day Gov. Martin O’Malley officially certified the Nov. 6 election results that included the passage of the referendum on the state’s same-sex marriage law by a 52-48 percent margin. Attorney General Doug Gansler wrote in a Nov. 29 opinion that gays and lesbians could begin to marry in the state on Jan. 1.

The Cecil County Circuit Court began issuing marriage licenses to same-sex couples on Monday, while gays and lesbians will be able to apply for them in Prince George’s County Circuit Court starting on Dec. 18. Clerks in Caroline, Queen Anne’s and St. Mary’s Counties will not begin issuing marriage licenses to same-sex couples until Jan. 2. (Question 6 lost in all five of the aforementioned jurisdictions.)

Heather Ware and her partner of seven years are the first same-sex couple to receive a marriage license in Alleghany County. She told the Washington Blade the staff at the clerk’s office in Cumberland “were so friendly.”

“They just walked us through the whole thing,” Ware said. “It was very simple. You could tell they were excited about it too, so that was a good feeling.”

Ellicott City residents Dale Knight and Jeff Arney, who will celebrate their 15th anniversary in June, on Friday became the first gay couple in Howard County to receive a marriage license. Knight told the Blade the three women who were working in the clerk’s office where they submitted their application were “really friendly” and “very happy to have us there.”

He said they took his and Arney’s picture and clapped for them.

“While we were there (in the clerk’s office) it was us, another lesbian couple and a straight couple,” Knight said. “I was like, ‘Oh look, a little melting pot here.’ It was kind of cute.”

Takoma Park lawyer Sue Silber, who is also an Equality Maryland board member, told the Blade on Wednesday she has not received any reports of clerks who have refused to issue marriage licenses to same-sex couples.

“All in all, generally the couples I’ve been talking too it’s been smooth, it’s been celebratory,” Mark Scurti, a partner at Pessin Katz Law in Towson, added. “Everybody’s been friendly. It’s been an air of celebration — very positive.”

Even though gays and lesbians across Maryland have had little difficulty obtaining marriage licenses in jurisdictions where clerks have begun issuing them, extending state tax, spousal and other benefits to same-sex partners once the law takes effect could prove more difficult.

Scurti said some title companies have refused to issue title insurance policies to same-sex couples — he provided them copies of the state Court of Appeals’ unanimous decision in May that recognized nuptials for gays and lesbians legally performed in D.C. and other jurisdictions.

Washington County in July began offering spousal benefits to employees who legally married their same-sex partner after Lambda Legal filed a complaint with the Maryland Commission on Human Rights on behalf of a county librarian whose application for spousal benefits had been denied. Baltimore County in late 2010 extended same-sex spousal benefits to county employees after the LGBT legal advocacy group filed grievances on behalf of two married lesbian police officers whose applications had been denied.

The Anne Arundel County Public Schools in July 2011 extended these benefits to gay and lesbian employees who legally married outside of Maryland.

Scurti said a Baltimore City solicitor had to become involved in a case where a clerk refused to recognize same-sex marriage for purposes of recording a couple’s deed. Maryland income and estate tax rules still define marriage as written under the federal Defense of Marriage Act, so same-sex couples will still have to file separate 2012 state tax returns.

“There are issues to still work out around that stuff,” Silber said, noting Equality Maryland and other groups continue to address them. “I don’t know yet whether all of this will be smooth when people start marrying, but we’re working on it. DOMA makes it very complicated.”

In spite of these potential hurdles, a number of couples continue to move forward with their plans to tie the knot on Jan. 1.

Ware, her partner and at least three other same-sex couples are discussing the possibility of marrying in Cumberland just after midnight on New Year’s Day.

“We fought so hard for it and the couples that will be standing there with us understand how hard it’s been, how much we’ve wanted it,” she said. “It’s definitely been a fight that I think should be celebrated together.”

A close friend who has become a wedding officient plans to marry Knight and Arney at her Howard County home at 12:01 a.m. on Jan. 1. The couple plans to have a larger wedding later in the year, but Knight said he and his partner want to secure the legal protections the new law will afford to same-sex couples.

“God forbid something happened to one of us, we at least know that we have some protection in the eyes of the state that we’re married,” he said. “Besides, we’ve waited long enough. Some people are waiting or whatever and that’s fine. But for us, we feel like we’ve waited long enough and we just kind of want that as soon as we can get it.”

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District of Columbia

D.C. Pride flag raising ceremony set for June 1

Mayor, council members to participate

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D.C. Mayor Muriel Bowser at the flag-raising of the Progress Pride flag at the Wilson Building in D.C. on June 1, 2023. (Washington Blade photo by Michael Key)

D.C. Mayor Muriel Bowser’s Office of LGBTQ Affairs is inviting the LGBTQ community and friends to attend the city’s annual Pride flag raising ceremony scheduled for 4 p.m. Monday, June 1, outside the John Wilson Building that serves as the D.C. City Hall.

Like in prior years, members of the D.C. Council and officials with the Office of LGBTQ Affairs were expected to join Bowser in delivering remarks on the front entrance steps at the Wilson Building before raising the Pride flag atop one of the tall flagpoles next to the building’s entrance.

Gaby Vincent, a spokesperson for the LGBTQ Affairs Office, said attendees of the flag raising ceremony will be invited to attend a reception immediately following the ceremony in the main lobby of the Wilson Building, which is located on Pennsylvania Avenue at 14th Street, N.W.

She said the reception will feature a DJ, dancing, and refreshments provided by the D.C. LGBTQ bar and café Spark Social House.  

Vincent said the flag raising event will also mark the 20th anniversary of the opening of the D.C. Mayor’s Office of LGBTQ Affairs.

In its official announcement of the flag raising event the LGBTQ Affairs Office also announced it is hosting the 7th annual District of Pride Showcase event to be held Friday, June 17, at 7 p.m. at the Lincoln Theater.

The announcement says LGBTQ community members, families, and allies are also invited to walk with Bowser in the Capital Pride Parade scheduled for Saturday, June 20. It says the mayor’s parade contingent will assemble at 2 p.m. at the parade’s starting location at 14th and U Streets, N.W.

“As we also celebrate the 20th anniversary of the Mayor’s Office of LGBTQ Affairs, we invite residents, community members, families and allies to join us throughout June for moments of pride, connection, visibility, and joy,” the announcement says.  

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District of Columbia

‘Queer Love’ campaign launched to address domestic violence

D.C. event set for LGBTQ+ Domestic Violence Awareness Day on May 28

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‘Domestic and family violence in LGBTQ+ communities is real and too often invisible,’ said Cesar Toledo, the Alston Foundation’s executive director. (Photo courtesy of Toledo)

The D.C.-based Wanda Alston Foundation, which provides housing and support services for homeless LGBTQ youth, announced earlier this month that it has joined partner organizations to launch a Queer Love Shouldn’t Hurt campaign aimed at addressing domestic violence within the LGBTQ community.

 In a May 18 statement, the Alston Foundation said the campaign involves a public awareness initiative leading up to LGBTQ+ Domestic Violence Awareness Day scheduled for May 28. 

“Domestic and family violence in LGBTQ+ communities is real and too often invisible,” Cesar Toledo, the Alston Foundation’s executive director, said in the statement. “As a community, we do not talk about it enough, and that silence can leave survivors feeling isolated and alone,” he said. “We must break that silence.”

He added that culturally competent care for those impacted by domestic violence is available through a newly launched website, queerlove.org, “where people can safely access vital resources, educational toolkits, and support networks they need on their healing journey.”

The website announces one of the project’s first events, a Queer Love Community Social, was scheduled for Thursday, May 28,  from 6-8 p.m. at the D.C. LGBTQ+ Community Center at 1827 Wiltberger St., N.W.

“Join us this LGBT+ Domestic Violence Awareness Day for a community social dedicated to visibility and survivor resilience,” the website statement says. “Let’s gather to strengthen our bonds, honor the path to healing, and share free resources,” it says of the May 28 event. 

The website also announces a June 1 workshop called Empowering Survivors of LGBTQ+ Intimate Partner Violence, which it says will be presented by Jesse Wedell, an official with the D.C. LGBT+ Counseling Collaborative. The website provides an online form to register for the workshop upon which its location would be disclosed.        

It identifies the partner organizations working with the Alston Foundation on the Queer Love Public Awareness Campaign as the LGBT+ Counseling Collaborative, Whitman-Walker Health, the D.C. LGBTQ+ Community Center, and Equality Chamber.

 The resources and information provided by the project can be accessed at www.queerlove.org.

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District of Columbia

Man accused of threatening to shoot D.C. bar employee after making anti-gay slurs

May 24 incident took place near Black Pride events on U Street

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(Bigstock photo)

D.C. police on Sunday, May 24, at around 4:20 p.m. arrested a Maryland man for allegedly threatening to shoot an employee while using anti-gay slurs at Ben’s Next Door restaurant and bar at 1211 U St., N.W.

According to a statement released by police and a police incident report, the arrested man, identified as Delonte Fraley, 32, of Accokeek, Md., made the threats after the employee told a bartender not to serve the man alcohol.

“The suspect overheard the employee and threatened to shoot the employee and used homophobic slurs against the employee,” the police statement says. “When the employee left the restaurant for the day, the suspect was standing near the employee’s vehicle,” it says.

“The employee returned to the restaurant and called the police,” the statement continues. “The suspect was apprehended by responding officers,” it says.

The police statement says the arresting officers charged Fraley with Felony Threats (Hate/Bias).

D.C. Superior Court records show prosecutors with the Office of the U.S. Attorney for D.C., which prosecutes D.C. criminal cases, escalated the charge to Threatening to Injure or Kidnap a Person (Bias-Related Hate Crime).

The incident occurred during Memorial Day weekend when thousands of visitors and D.C. area LGBTQ advocates and supporters were attending D.C. Black Pride events held in locations across the city, including Black Pride parties hosted by LGBTQ bars in the U Street entertainment area near Ben’s Next Door.

Among the nearby LGBTQ bars hosting D.C. Black Pride events were Nellie’s Sports Bar and Thurst Lounge. Ben’s Next Door is located next to the popular longtime U Street eatery Ben’s Chili Bowl.

Court records show that Judge Robert R. Rigsby at a May 25 presentment hearing released Fraley on personal recognizance with a stay-away order — the details of which were not publicly disclosed pending a June 4 preliminary hearing.   

A more detailed arrest affidavit filed in court by D.C. police says Fraley allegedly confronted the employee at Ben’s Next Door with anti-gay slurs on the day prior to his arrest.

“The complainant told the defendant that because he used homophobic slurs towards himself previously on May 23, 2026, and his hostess, as well as making threats to the complainant and calling him a faggot, he was unable to stay in the establishment,” the affidavit states.

It adds, “The defendant became irate stating, ‘I know where your Tesla is at. See me outside faggot, I will slap your ass’ and ‘I will shoot your ass.’” The affidavit says the complainant confirmed to police the Tesla referred to by Fraley was his vehicle. It says as the victim walked toward his car after getting off work, he saw Fraley standing directly in front of the car.

“The complainant stated he felt unsafe while the defendant was standing in front of his vehicle because he felt the defendant was capable of carrying out those threats,” says the affidavit. It says the victim then decided to return to the restaurant and call police without the defendant having seen him.  

“The defendant was placed under arrest for Felony Threats Hate/Bias and was transported to the Third District Station for processing,” the affidavit concludes.

It couldn’t immediately be determined whether the victim identifies as LGBTQ or whether any of the Ben’s Next Door patrons had been involved with D.C. Black Pride.

“Established in 2008, Ben’s Next Door is a family-owned and operated restaurant and bar on U Street, Northwest in Washington, D.C.,” a statement on its website says. “As a Black-owned establishment, it’s our goal to deliver a warm, welcoming, familiar, and communal vibe to all guests,” the statement says.    

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