Living
Country roads, take me home
New W.Va. gay club hopes to succeed where others nearby have failed

A recent night at The Club, a new gay bar in Martinsburg, W.Va. (Photo by Dale Gish)
MARTINSBURG, W.Va. — Gay-popular entertainment districts are almost always found in major metropolitan areas, but there’s a smattering of clubs and restaurants in the close-by regions of Maryland’s Cumberland Valley and West Virginia’s Eastern Panhandle that are drawing decent-sized crowds despite being more than an hour from either Washington or Baltimore.
For decades, The Lodge in Boonsboro, Md., has been pretty much the only gay nightclub in the region. Formerly known as Deer Park Lodge and at times closed altogether, it’s been thriving again under new management since 2011 when partners Ryan Dryden and Joe Velazquez moved from Washington to reopen and run it.
Since January, it’s faced some competition as The Club (theclubwv.com), a new gay bar/club in Martinsburg, W.Va.’s Spring Mills area (about 21 miles from The Lodge), took over a large spot formerly known as straight bars Ambitions and before that, Gatsby’s. Owner Coby Myers, a gay sheriff in West Virginia, has his gay friends Jarvis Jerry Brooks and Dale Gish running the operation. They say, so far, business has been good and that they’re carving out a niche for themselves in the region by offering strong customer service, a “family”-type atmosphere and a clean and newly remodeled space. It’s about 80 miles from Dupont Circle.
“A lot of people feel it’s just easier to get instant gratification now on the Internet,” says Brooks, who DJs at The Club in addition to booking talent and planning events. “I think my thing is just that a lot of clubs have forgotten the whole aspect of a family feel, where everybody knows your name and there’s a home bar feel to it. You’re not just a number, you’re not just a door cover, there’s more to it than that.”
But can it last? Are there enough LGBT residents in these parts of Maryland and West Virginia to support two small-town gay clubs? A few others have come and gone in recent years. The Mariner Club, locals say, had a decent run for a few years on Martinsburg’s Winchester Ave. It was across the street from Sugar Daddy’s, a male strip club that, although not technically gay, had gay strippers and more gay male patrons than straight women. But both are now closed.
And more recently Spin/Club Underground, which was in downtown Hagerstown just a few doors down from the historic Maryland Theatre, died a relatively quick death after being open less than a year. Brooks, who DJed at the gay club (his DJ name is Jerrbear), says business was “hit and miss.”
Those involved say they see a brighter future for The Club.
“For one thing, it’s not mismanaged,” says Ray Stagner, a drag queen who performs as Cheyenne and who debuted at The Club last Saturday night.
Wearing full drag makeup but dressed in a ball cap, jeans and guy’s T-shirt while puffing on a cigarette in The Club’s downstairs smoking-allowed pool room, Stagner, a Hagerstown resident, says gays and drag performers in the region will support both The Club and The Lodge. Because of liquor laws, The Club can stay open an hour later (until 3 a.m.) on Saturday nights whereas the Lodge closes at 2.
“I think it’s great,” Stagner says. “If people want to go here one night they can, or they may do like we used to do in the old days. As soon as they called last call at Deer Park, we used to bail from Hagerstown and come down here to Gatsby’s once they closed the bars in Hagerstown.”
Last Saturday night at about 10 p.m., The Club had a healthy crowd though it wasn’t packed. The space is mammoth — there’s a large dance area, stage, bar, tables, seating area, downstairs pool room, kitchen and a huge outdoor patio and bar Brooks says they “can’t wait” to use once the weather gets warmer.
“It reminds me of the old Tracks in D.C.,” he says. “There’s so much potential for this space.”
All the interiors have been redecorated since it was Ambitions. The hardwood dance floor, Brooks says, is the one original component — it dates to the 1950s.
A diverse crowd mills about including 20- and 30-ish gay guys, a few older gay men, a few lesbians and a drag queen or two. A few dance, but not many. It’s still early. Several make trips up and down the half-flight of stairs to take smoke breaks. The pool room is less opulent, but the smokers don’t seem to mind. Large industrial smoke eaters keep the room clean and from upstairs it’s impossible to tell there’s smoke in the building.
Gish says the region is large enough that gays are coming from Winchester, Va.; Cumberland, Md.; even Greencastle and Chambersburg, Pa., and that The Club will thrive. Gays from Baltimore or D.C. who want a change of scenery even visit on occasion, he says.
“We’re seeing our weekend door counts increase every weekend,” Gish says. “I think it will only improve as the weather warms.”
There are about 12 on staff but DJs and drag performers are independent contractors. Brooks says they’re seeing about 200 come through the doors on an average Saturday night. A few times it’s gotten close to 300. It’s open Wednesday through Saturday and on weekends there’s a $5 cover. Eighteen-to-20-year-olds can get in anytime but have to pass Breathalyzer tests when they come and go. Gish guesses about 20 percent of the clientele might be “some variation of straight” and says the crowd, because of the smaller overall numbers, is more integrated than in city bars. He says straights, lesbians, bears and twinks all party together here.
Despite rumors of bad blood between The Club and The Lodge, the owners of the latter say they bear no ill will.
“It’s really not a question of competition, it doesn’t matter how many there are in the area, there are more than enough [LGBT people] to go around,” Velazquez says. “So far business has stayed good for us and been pretty good for them. Whether it stays that way, time will tell.”
He says there are even some unexpected benefits at times.
Of The Lodge’s drag cast, Velazquez says he encourages them to perform at other bars.
“They get fans who will then follow them from show to show and we have some people who only show up for the drag shows, so it’s good for them to be out at different bars in the area,” he says. “I have no problem with it. It’s a free world. If I wanted to have them sign an exclusivity contract, I would, but we don’t.”
There are also a few gay-owned restaurants in the region — the Gourmet Goat and Georgia Boys Café in Hagerstown, and Café Izmir in nearby Funkstown, Md.
The Goat, (41 North Potomac Street), has been in its present location for seven years and is known for its vast array of martinis. Owners Steve Cook and Paul Deputy live on site and run it “very much hands on,” Deputy says.
Café Izmir is owned by Nihal Mizah, who’s straight. The cafe became an LGBT destination of sorts during the time The Lodge was closed. Lesbian Karla Auch helps her manage it.
Gish says he thinks it’s more than a coincidence. Although these areas, he says, will never have the large gay communities Baltimore and Washington have, there are LGBT people here and he says they’re more comfortable being out and open than they were even a decade ago.
“I think there’s a social change happening,” he says. “And not just in the media, but in families too and the culture in general. It’s becoming more accepted to be gay and be open about it, or lesbian, or bi or trans or whatever you are. Society is becoming more accepting and these business owners want to pursue their dreams without feeling that they’re going to be persecuted. I know all these business owners and I support them all and wish them the best.”
Real Estate
How federal layoffs, shutdown threaten D.C.-area landlords
When paychecks disappear, the shock doesn’t stop at the Beltway
When federal paychecks disappear, the shock doesn’t stop at the Beltway. It lands on the doorsteps of the region’s property owners, those who rent out their rowhouses in Petworth, condos in Crystal City, and homes stretching into Montgomery and Prince George’s counties. Landlords depend on steady rent from tenants employed by the very institutions that are now downsized or worse, shuttered.
This fall, Washington’s economic identity is being tested once again. Thousands of federal workers who accepted “deferred resignation” packages will soon lose their income altogether. And with a long government shutdown looming, even those still on the payroll face delayed paychecks. For landlords, that combination of uncertainty and sudden income loss threatens to unsettle a rental market already balancing on the edge.
A Test of Resilience
Rosie Allen-Herring, president of United Way of the National Capital Area, recently told The Washington Post, “This region stands to take a hard hit from those who are no longer employed but can’t find new employment and now find themselves in need. It’s a full-circle moment to be a donor and now find yourself in need, but it is very real for this area.” 1 That reversal captures the broader moment: The D.C. economy built on federal paychecks and charitable giving now faces a stress test of compassion and cash flow alike.
For landlords, adaptability will determine who weathers the storm. Those who are able to keep the rent coming in, retain their tenants or find replacement tenants without the same economic hardships are going to be able to get to the other side with manageable financial disruptions. Those who plan, communicate, and stay financially flexible will keep their properties occupied and their reputations intact.
A Region Built on Federal Pay
Roughly one in ten jobs in the Washington metropolitan area is tied directly to the federal government, according to the Bureau of Labor Statistics. That number climbs sharply when you include contractors, nonprofits, and think tanks dependent on federal funding.
This concentration means that when the federal government sneezes, D.C.’s housing market catches a cold. The Brookings Institution recently reported that since January, the region’s unemployment rate has climbed eight times faster than the national average, and local job growth has flattened. 1 More anecdotal, I’ve spoken with property owners this year who are looking to rent out the property they own in DC because they have to move to another region for work.
As The Post observed, “The region has shed federal jobs at a higher rate, and both the number of homes for sale and the share of residents with low credit scores have grown more quickly here than the rest of the country.” 1
For landlords, that’s a flashing warning light. When a certain category of tenants with solid compensation lose reliable government salaries and face dim re-employment prospects, rent becomes harder to collect and rent levels can decline year on year.
The Human Side of a Policy Shock
The people behind these statistics are often long-tenured civil servants. The Post profiled former State Department employee Brian Naranjo, who said he had “unsuccessfully thrown his résumé at more than 50 positions since resigning in May.” “It’s terrible,” Naranjo told the paper. “You have far more people going for those very specialized jobs than would normally be out there.” 1
Another displaced worker, Jennifer Malenab, a 42-year-old former Department of Homeland Security employee, described canceling daycare and family vacations while she scours job boards. “This is not where you want to be at 42, with a family,” she said. 1
When households like these lose steady pay, not only do they pull back on spending, but if they are renters landlords may see a lag in rent receipts, requests for partial payments, or in some cases, a premature notice to vacate. Some tenants will relocate out of the region altogether — a prospect already visible in rising “for sale” listings and increased moving-truck activity in Northern Virginia and suburban Maryland.
What Happens When the Rent Doesn’t Arrive
When rent payments are disrupted, even temporarily, the financial effects can be immediate. Many small landlords depend on rent to cover their mortgages, property taxes, insurance premiums, and routine maintenance. Even a temporary interruption in income can deplete reserves, delay repairs, and strain their ability to meet loan obligations.
Larger multifamily owners are not immune. If multiple tenants in a building lose income at once, cash flow can fall sharply. During the brief 2019 government shutdown, some D.C. landlords offered short-term payment plans to furloughed workers with the expectation of eventual back pay. However, under current conditions, where many positions are being permanently eliminated and paychecks may not be restored, landlords face much greater uncertainty and cannot assume repayment will be guaranteed.
In the District of Columbia, the Rental Housing Commission has advised landlords to continue operating strictly within established legal procedures and to avoid informal or selective payment arrangements that could be interpreted as discriminatory under the D.C. Human Rights Act. Courts in Virginia and Maryland allow temporary continuances when tenants provide documentation of a federal furlough or income disruption, but it is the court, not the landlord, that determines eligibility for relief.
How Landlords Should Proceed
- Continue filing nonpayment cases through normal legal channels rather than delaying action.
- Allow the courts to apply any continuance or relief provisions if a tenant qualifies due to federal employment status or income interruption.
- Avoid making selective accommodations based on a tenant’s job type or federal employment status, as this may violate equal-treatment and source-of-income protections.
Landlords with a single tenant or a consistent written policy of offering payment plans to all tenants experiencing verified income disruption should not be at risk of discriminatory treatment.
Vacancy, Concessions, and Shifting Demand
Beyond nonpayment of rent, landlords face a challenge from a different direction: weak demand. As fewer jobs are being created and unemployed or under-employed tenants move out of DC, the supply of available rental units will rise, forcing landlords to compete more aggressively on price and amenities.
Market data already point that direction. The volume of rental listings across the District of Columbia jumped roughly 14 percent year-over-year in September, according to the realtor Multiple Listing Service (MLS) trends, as reported by the Washington Business Journal. Landlords are offering free parking, one-month concessions, or flexible leases to retain quality tenants.
Neighborhoods once buffered by federal stability like Silver Spring, Falls Church, and Alexandria may now see higher tenant turnover. As one Arlington property manager put it, “We used to say federal employees were the safest tenants in America. Now we’re rewriting that rule.”
A Shrinking Workforce, a Softer Market
In addition to the layoffs, the region is contending with a broader identity crisis. “Yesim Sayin, executive director of the D.C. Policy Center, put it bluntly: ‘Beyond federal employment, we relied on tourism. But foreign tourists aren’t coming. And we relied a whole lot on universities bringing talent who would then stay here and be part of our talent pool. And that is kind of gone, too. So what are we now? We just don’t know.’” 1
This uncertainty may impact property values and investor sentiment. When employers relocate, renters follow. If enough mid-career professionals leave, demand for rentals will first soften and then we’ll begin to see a lowering of the average rents a landlord can command for their rental. We have already seen this in the current rental market. Rents that seems reasonable a few years ago, are now being discounted by hundreds of dollars. Landlords who are searching for new renters after several years of having tenants are finding that they need to bring rent levels below where they used to be to secure tenants commitments.
Strategies for Landlords: Staying Solvent and Supportive
In times like these, survival depends on both prudence and empathy.
1. Communicate early. Encourage tenants to disclose financial hardship before missing payments. Written payment plans, properly documented, can forestall eviction while preserving goodwill.
2. Review legal protections. Understand D.C., Maryland, and Virginia rules regarding furlough continuances or income-source discrimination. Seek legal counsel before altering lease terms mid-cycle.
3. Build reserves and credit access. Line up a home-equity or business line of credit to bridge shortfalls. Cash on hand always is helpful to have as a buffer for the impact of income disruption.
4. Monitor policy developments. State and local governments are supporting people who are affected by the lay-offs. Landlords can benefit indirectly through their renters who are utilizing these programs to assist them in paying their monthly expenses.
5. Contact your Congressional representatives to demand the reopening of the federal government. And in D.C., you do benefit from representation, even though they cannot vote. They can influence decisions that matter.
Scott Bloom is owner and senior property manager of Columbia Property Management.
Real Estate
Real terrors of homeownership come from neglect, not ghosts
Mold, termites, frayed wires scarier than any poltergeist
Each October, we decorate our homes with cobwebs, skeletons, and flickering jack-o’-lanterns to create that spooky Halloween atmosphere. But for anyone who’s ever been through a home inspection there’s no need for fake scares. Homes can hide terrors that send chills down your spine any time of year. From ghostly noises in the attic to toxic monsters in the basement, here are some of the eeriest (but real) things inspectors and homeowners discover.
Every haunted house movie starts with a creepy basement, and in real life, it’s often just as menacing. Mold, mildew, and hidden water leaks lurk down there like invisible phantoms. At first, it’s just a musty smell — something you might brush off as “old house syndrome,” but soon enough, you realize those black or green patches creeping along the walls can be more sinister than any poltergeist.
Black mold (Stachybotrys chartarum) is particularly fearsome – it thrives in damp, dark places and can cause serious respiratory problems. It’s not just gross – it’s toxic and, while some types of mold can be easily cleaned up, removing black mold can cost more than an exorcism.
Have you ever heard strange buzzing or seen flickering lights that seem to move on their own? Before you call the Ghostbusters, call an electrician. Faulty wiring, outdated panels, and aluminum circuits from the mid-20th century are the true villains behind many mysterious house fires. Home inspectors can also find open junction boxes, frayed wires stuffed behind walls, or overloaded breaker panels that hum like a restless spirit.
Imagine an invisible specter floating through your home – something that’s been there since the 1950s, waiting for you to disturb it. That’s asbestos. Home inspectors dread discovering asbestos insulation around old boilers or wrapped around ductwork. It’s often lurking in popcorn ceilings, floor tiles, and even wall plaster. You can’t see it, smell it, or feel it—but inhaling those microscopic fibers can lead to serious illness decades later.
Lead pipes, once thought to be durable and reliable, are like the vampires of your water system – quietly poisoning what sustains you. The results of a lead test can be chilling: even a small amount of lead exposure is dangerous, particularly for children.
And it’s not just pipes – lead paint is another problem that refuses to die. You might find it sealed beneath layers of newer paint, biding its time until it chips or flakes away. This is why, when selling a property built prior to 1978, homeowners must disclose any knowledge of lead paint in the home and provide any records they may have of its presence or abatement.
Scratching in the walls. Tiny footsteps overhead. Droppings in the attic. It’s not a poltergeist – it’s pests. Termites, rats, bats, carpenter ants, and even raccoons can do more damage than any ghost ever could.
Termites are the silent assassins of the home world, chewing through beams and joists until the structure itself starts to sag. Rats and mice leave behind droppings that can spread disease and contaminate food. Bats are federally protected, meaning your haunted attic guests can’t just be evicted without proper precautions. And I once had a raccoon give birth in my chimney flue; my dogs went crazy.
Ever step into a home and feel the floors tilt under your feet? That’s no ghostly illusion – it’s the foundation shifting beneath you. Cracked walls, doors that won’t close, and windows that rattle in their frames are the architectural equivalent of a horror movie scream.
Foundation damage can come from settling soil, poor drainage, or tree roots rising from under the structure. In extreme cases, inspectors find entire crawl spaces flooded, joists eaten by rot, or support beams cracked like brittle bones. Repair costs can be monstrous – and if left unchecked, the whole house could become a haunted ruin.
Some homes hold more than just physical scares. Behind the drywall or under the floorboards, inspectors may uncover personal relics – old letters, photographs, even hidden safes or forgotten rooms. Occasionally, however, there are stranger finds: jars of preserved “specimens,” taxidermy gone wrong, or mysterious symbols scrawled in attic spaces.
These discoveries tell stories of the people who lived there before, sometimes fascinating, sometimes chilling, but they all add to the eerie charm of an old home, reminding us that every house has a history — and some histories don’t like to stay buried.
So, while haunted houses may be a Halloween fantasy, the real terrors in homeownership come from neglect, not ghosts. Regular inspections, good maintenance, and modern updates are the garlic and holy water that turn a trick of a home into a treat.
Valerie M. Blake is a licensed associate broker in D.C., Maryland, and Virginia with RLAH @properties. Call or text her at 202-246-8602, email her via DCHomeQuest.com, or follow her on Facebook at TheRealst8ofAffairs.
Advice
Sexual desire is waning, should we open our relationship?
Couple faces difficult choices after seven years
Dear Michael,
When I met my husband seven years ago, I was super attracted to him and we had a really hot sex life.
That feeling has been waning for a while and now I am just not feeling it.
I know that people get older, gain weight, get less attractive over time but that’s not the case here. Ben is as good looking as ever. But I have little desire to have sex with him.
It bothers me that I don’t really want to have sex with the guy I love and want to spend the rest of my life with.
Is this why everyone else I know has an open relationship? Is there something I can do to want to have sex with my husband again?
This is causing major problems in my marriage. I don’t initiate anymore and half the time I find an excuse to not have sex when Ben initiates. He knows something is up but I usually blame it on work stress or not feeling well. I don’t want to hurt his feelings.
Aside from this, I love Ben and we have a lot of fun together. We’re very close, talk about all sorts of stuff, but not this.
Michael replies:
Pretty much everyone in a long-term relationship has to deal with decreased desire at some point.
Sex changes after you’ve been with your partner for a while. Sex is not going to be as easy, hot, and irresistible as it was at the beginning of the relationship. Newness generates a lot of the sexual heat at the outset of a relationship, and when the newness is gone, you don’t easily feel the same sizzling excitement that you felt when you first met.
Unfortunately, the kind of sex that people have at the beginning of a relationship is totally glorified in our culture as the gold standard of sex.
I say “unfortunately” because it’s not possible to consistently have the hot sex of a new relationship, ongoing, with a long-term partner. So if you think that is the best or only kind of sex to have, you will be contemptuous of anything else, and you will be disappointed in your sex life with your partner as time marches on.
But the sizzling sex people have at the start of a relationship is just one way to have sex. If you are willing to be imaginative, and are open to change, there are many other kinds of sex that can be wonderful.
How about sex for emotional connection? Sex for physical closeness? Sex for romance? Sex to celebrate just being together?
So, consider changing (not lowering!) your expectations. Rather than sulking or moping that you don’t want to spontaneously jump Ben’s bones, be open to having sex with your husband that is based more on your relationship and on your love for each other.
Now, here’s a whole other angle to consider: While the excitement of a new partner often fades, there are still ways to generate excitement and passion in a long-term relationship by taking risks and revealing yourself more deeply. Stick with me and I’ll explain.
- You haven’t said anything to Ben about your waning interest. I encourage you to re-think this. You would be much better positioned to tackle this issue collaboratively. Not talking about how stuck you feel is likely to deepen your feeling of shame and fear that something is wrong. Speaking with Ben about what is actually a fairly common couples’ issue could be a relief.
- Ironic as this may seem, the closer two people are, the less comfortable they may be being frankly sexual with each other. Clients often tell me that they are more comfortable expressing their real desires to someone they hardly know (or don’t know at all) than to their significant other. For one thing, the more your partner means to you, the more you may fear rejection if you reveal sexual feelings and desires that might upset or even shock your partner. For another, as couples get closer, sex may start to feel like too much closeness, and avoiding sex may be a way to create some space.
Not speaking up about what is important keeps you distant from your partner and drains your relationship of vitality. A powerful antidote to this: work toward becoming a person who can take risks, tolerate discomfort and uncertainty, and be able stand on your own when you don’t get your partner’s validation.
Talking with Ben, whether it’s about your lack of spontaneous desire for sex, or about sexual interests you may be keeping from him for fear of judgment, would involve your making uncomfortable moves that might lead to Ben’s judgment or even rejection. But doing so would also, of course, allow the possibility of more happening between you sexually. It would also let Ben know you better, thereby deepening the level of intimacy in your relationship. Making these moves could also be inherently exciting, which —guess what—could help to shake you out of your sexual doldrums and bring more passion and life into your relationship.
Similarly, you might start initiating. Even if you’re afraid it won’t go well and even if you’re not feeling it. That is the only way you are going to figure out how to have satisfying long-term sex. Take the need for an erection or orgasm off the table. Sex with your partner should not be a performance. Go for closeness, connection, and what feels good. And challenge yourself to go places that you are uncomfortable about going.
If any of this intrigues you, “Passionate Marriage” and “Intimacy and Desire,” both by David Schnarch, explore how your sexual connection can deepen over time in a long-term relationship.
Finally, with regard to your considering an open relationship as a remedy: Do you think that would enhance the sexual connection between you and Ben?
Michael Radkowsky, Psy.D. is a licensed psychologist who works with couples and individuals in D.C. He can be found online at michaelradkowsky.com. All identifying information has been changed for reasons of confidentiality. Have a question? Send it to [email protected].
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