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Travel: Gay summer getaways

Upcoming travel season offers something for every taste

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Olivia Travel, gay news, Washington Blade
Wonderland Weekend, gay travel, gay news, Washington Blade

A recent Wonderland Weekend pool party. (Photo courtesy Wonderland Weekend)

This summer, trade shoveling snow for bead tossing in New Orleans, swap Beltway traffic for roping a sexy cowboy in New Mexico or trade the humdrum neighborhood bar for the opening of the world’s largest gay nightclub in Vegas. Here are a few scintillating ideas to flirt with before packing your bags for your summer vacation.

Bear Town Weekend

Portland

June 6-9, Portland hosts the 18th annual Bear Town Weekend, where an average of 400 bears and bear lovers come out to celebrate at events such as the Pirate’s Booty UnderBear Dance, Taste of Portland, the “Shed the Shirt” T-Shirt Exchange, Bingo with the Sisters and the Mr. Oregon Bear Breakfast. The registration for all events is $125. Some other events to check out that weekend include the Rose Festival and Portland’s Fleet Week.

beartownweekend.com

Where to stay: The Jupiter Hotel is the host hotel for Bear Town weekend

Queer Walking Tours

Toronto

Looking to do something active this summer? The Toronto Queer Walking Tours company was created to highlight how the gay community has evolved over time to inhabit different parts of Toronto. You will have the opportunity to walk neighborhoods such as Allan Gardens and Gay Village, with tour stops at the Glad Day Bookstore, Village gay bars and the Canadian Gay Lesbian Archives. The mission of the company is “through knowledge and education we can better understand what makes up a queer community and how the past has changed the way we see ourselves and others.” The tours run year long and range from $10-$20, or hire a private tour guide, which starts at $50.

torontoqueerwalkingtours.com

Where to stay: The Delta Chelsea Hotel Downtown is located near the Village

Out at Universal Studios

Los Angeles

Out at Universal, gay travel, gay news, Washington Blade

A recent Out at Universal event in Los Angeles. (Photo courtesy Universal)

Party promoter Tom Whitman is throwing the ninth annual Out at Universal/Wonderland party, which takes place at Universal Studios Theme Park on June 8. Explore your wild side by trying some of the Universal Studios attractions, such as Transformers 3D The Ride, the Simpsons Ride and Jurassic Park The Ride, all of which will be open to guests. The main dance party takes place from 10 p.m.-4 a.m., which is hosted by Club Papi, Masterbeat and Tom Whitman Presents. The presale price for the Out at Universal/ Wonderland party pass is $85. Other events during Wonderland Weekend include an exclusive Beverly Hills estate pool party, Saturday afterhours and a Sunday tea dance.

wonderlandweekend.com

Where to stay: The SLS Hotel in West Hollywood is located near the gay nightlife

Krave Massive

Las Vegas 

If you are thinking of visiting Vegas this summer, it would be wise to do so on June 15, where the world’s largest gay nightclub will be unveiled. Located in downtown Las Vegas, Krave Massive will be an astonishing 80,000 square foot venue, which will feature five individually themed dance rooms, a state-of-the-art sound system, huge video walls, along with high-tech special effects. What separates this gay nightclub from the rest is that it is not only a dance space, but it will also be home to a gay comedy club, a retail store, a multi-purpose room, a lesbians-only dance lounge, as well as the country’s only LGBT movie theater.

kravemassive.com.

Where to stay: The Wynn Las Vegas has its own dedicated LGBT concierge

Olivia Travel

Olivia Travel, gay news, Washington Blade

(Photo by Tina Silano; courtesy Olivia Travel)

San Francisco-based Olivia Travel bills itself as the world’s “premier provider of lesbian cruise, resort and adventure vacations.” It has several lavish summer trips planned including a cruise to Ireland and the Scotland British Isles (July 18-25), a Provence-to-Burgundy Riverboat Cruise (July 30-Aug. 6), several exotic fall adventures and a wide array of 2014 trips planned as well.

Visit Olivia.com for full details. Or call 800-631-6277 or 415-962-5700. Monthly payment plans are available.

Gay Rodeo

Sante Fe, N.M.

During the weekend of Aug. 9-11, the New Mexico Gay Rodeo Association presents its 22nd annual Zia Regional rodeo, which consists of events like bull riding, steer wrestling, bareback bronco riding and calf-roping. Witness some of the light-hearted camp events, including wild drag steer-riding, steer decorating and a comical display of putting underwear on goats. The weekend comes to a close with a dance at a local bar or host hotel. Tickets are around $25 for the two-day event.

nmgra.com

Where to stay: Host hotel TBD

Northalsted Market Days

Chicago

On Aug. 10-11, visitors to Chicago will be able to experience the largest two-day street fair in the Midwest. The Northalsted Market Days event spans six city blocks and features about 40 musicians, including Olivia Newton-John, The Pointer Sisters and Karmin. This live music festival is free, with a suggested donation of $8. The event draws a lively, upscale crowd featuring more than 400 food and arts and crafts vendors.

northalsted.com.

Where to stay: The Amalfi Hotel is located 4 miles from Northalsted

Tropical Heat and Womenfest

Key West, Fla.

Key West, Tropical Heat, gay travel, gay news, Washington Blade

A Tropical Heat pool party in Key West. (Photo courtesy Key West Business Guild)

In a city where the chief of police is gay and rainbow flags wave proudly throughout the island, it only makes sense for Key West to be the host of two hot week-long summer parties: one for the girls and one for the boys. Tropical Heat takes place Aug. 15-18, and became known for its clothing-optional pool parties and snorkeling trips. Events taking place this year include toga parties, a wild drag show, “not your grandmother’s bingo”, a dungeon fetish party and the “Name Our Cock” fundraiser, which benefits Key West wildlife.

tropicalheatkw.com

The 31st annual Womenfest takes place Sept. 3-8, where an estimated 5,000 women participate in weeklong arts and music events. Womenfest has become a popular spot for women’s groups, such as Sister Funk and Emily Saliers of the Indigo Girls. Each night, lesbian bands play at four or five nightclubs, which are free. There are sunset dinner cruises, clothing-optional snorkeling and kayaking, a comedy show at the Cuban-owned San Carlos Institute and mechanical bull-riding at Cowboy Bills Honky Tonk Saloon.

womenfest.com/

Where to stay: Alexander’s Guesthouse is a gay and lesbian resort

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Real Estate

Under-the-radar Delaware beach towns smart buyers are targeting

There are other options if Rehoboth prices are scaring you off

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If you want to escape the crowds and nightlife scene of Rehoboth Beach, Sussex County offers plenty of options. (Blade file photo by Daniel Truitt)

Look, we love Rehoboth. We will always love Rehoboth. Queer folks have been flocking there since the 1940s, and with scores of LGBTQ-owned businesses and a Pride calendar packed tighter than the boardwalk in July, “Rehomo” earned its crown fair and square.

But let’s be honest with each other: trying to buy property there right now feels a lot like trying to get a reservation at the one good restaurant in town on a Saturday in August. Everyone wants in, inventory is tighter than your swim trunks after Labor Day brunch, and the prices have officially entered “are you kidding me” territory.

So here’s a thought: What if you didn’t fight the crowd? What if, instead, you let Rehoboth keep doing its glorious, chaotic, glitter-bomb thing and you quietly built your beach life 15 minutes away for considerably less drama and considerably more square footage? Here are four towns ready for their close-up.

Lewes: The Charming Overachiever

Lewes is what happens when a beach town actually has its life together. Historic charm, walkability, proximity to Cape Henlopen State Park, less crowding, and a strong year-round community. Unlike towns that turn into ghost towns after Labor Day, Lewes maintains a real community all year long, which is more than we can say for some situationships.

And right now, the market is practically begging you to make a move. It’s one of the most desirable and stable markets in the county — built for buyers thinking long-term, not flippers, and Sussex County overall has flipped into genuine buyer’s market territory for the first time in years. Translation: you finally get to be the one with leverage. 

Bethany Beach: My Personal Pick

Full disclosure: I own in Bethany. So consider this section a little biased — and also the most honest thing I’ll tell you in this whole article.

When I drive down from D.C., I’m not looking for more of D.C. I love this city, but I also love leaving it — and yes, some of the people in it too (you know who you are, and so do I). Bethany gives me that full exhale. It’s quiet in the way that actually means something: fewer crowds, slower mornings, a soundtrack that’s mostly waves instead of nightlife. It leans hard into its “quiet resort” reputation, with low property taxes and a limited geographic footprint, and it is not the least bit sorry about it. 

But quiet doesn’t mean isolated. I’ve got a genuinely excellent food scene nearby, real shopping, and a string of charming neighboring beach towns — and when I do want a taste of Rehoboth’s energy, it’s a short, easy drive away. I get to choose my dose of chaos instead of living inside it.

And here’s the part that matters most for this article: the price. If you’ve looked at Rehoboth listings and quietly closed the tab in despair, I need you to hear this — you can absolutely afford a beach house. It just doesn’t have to be in Rehoboth. Bethany’s average home value sits around $848,592, which is still real money, no question — but it buys you more house, more land, and more peace than the same budget gets you closer to the boardwalk. Bethany is welcoming too, just without Rehoboth’s decades of built-in queer institutional history — and for plenty of us, that trade-off is more than worth it. 

Fenwick Island: Small Town, Big Flex

Fenwick rarely gets mentioned and, frankly, it should be insulted. It’s tiny, it’s quiet, and it has beach access without the carnival energy. The market data tends to lump it in with Bethany, where single-family oceanfront homes clear $1 million while entry-level condos start in the $600s — proof that “under-the-radar” doesn’t mean “bargain bin,” it means “fewer people fighting you for it.” 

South Bethany: For the Boat Gays

Some of us want sand between our toes. Others want a private dock and a boat named something deeply unserious. South Bethany’s canal communities are built for the latter — water access on both sides, fewer crowds, and a lifestyle that says, “I have a captain’s hat and I am not afraid to wear it.”

The Math Works in Your Favor Now

Here’s the part that should really get your attention: Sussex County’s median sold price has dropped to $440,000, down 3.3% year-over-year, and buyers are routinely closing around 88 cents on the dollar compared to asking price. That’s a far cry from the unhinged bidding wars of 2021 and 2022, when overpaying was basically a competitive sport. Inventory across the county sits at nearly 2,500 active listings — the most of any county in Delaware, meaning you actually get to be picky for once. Revolutionary, we know. 

And no, choosing one of these towns doesn’t mean leaving your people behind. Sussex Pride serves the entire county, not just Rehoboth proper, and CAMP Rehoboth’s resources extend well beyond town limits too. You’re not exiling yourself to the suburbs of queerness — you’re just getting a bigger kitchen, a quieter porch, and a much shorter line for the bathroom. 

Add in the fact that Delaware has no estate tax and some of the lowest property taxes around, savings that genuinely add up over a retirement horizon, and the case writes itself. Rehoboth will always be the beating, sequined heart of queer beach culture in Delaware. But if you’ve been telling yourself a beach house isn’t in the cards — I’m here to tell you it absolutely is. It just might be 15 minutes south, with your own quiet porch, your own salt air, and considerably more room to breathe. 

Have a real estate question or Rehoboth market tip? Reach out to [email protected] for LGBTQ-friendly real estate resources in the Rehoboth area.


Justin Noble is a Realtor licensed in D.C., Maryland, and Delaware with Monument Sotheby’s International Realty. Reach him at [email protected] or 302-897-7499.

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Real Estate

‘Culture eats strategy for breakfast’

Real estate agents must adapt, learn how to manage from within

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A real estate agent is contractually bound to act on their client’s behalf. (Photo by Andy Dean Photography/Bigstock)

“Culture Eats Strategy for Breakfast” was a phrase often repeated in many of my management courses from the University of Illinois. The concept was discussed at length – how the best laid plans can sometimes be supported or derailed by the culture of the people involved in whichever project to be implemented. Whether it be a project to implement new software, roll out a new product or service, or just reaching a sales target, the way the team involved works together can indeed affect the outcome.  

Perhaps this is just another way to say, “teamwork makes the dream work!” Most teams usually have someone who is designated as a leader. The leader can try to lead through authority and control or can alternatively try to lead through influence and encouraging a more collective framework for solving problems.  

Why does this matter when picking the right real estate agent or team to work with? Besides having a job as a salesperson for the brokerage, the real estate agent is contractually bound to act on their client’s behalf. The buyer broker agreement is in place so that the agent and the client can work together as a team in communications regarding offer strategy, during negotiations, implementing marketing plans, as well as selecting which renovations or upgrades to choose before selling a property.  After the property goes under contract, the job isn’t “done”.  There is still work to do.  

At this point, the agents then turn into a project manager of sorts – coordinating communications between the lending team, the title attorneys, the other client’s agents, any governmental agencies that could be involved in down payment assistance or helping to clear a property for a sale, and often times groups like a condo board, a home inspector, or contractors when arranging repairs and estimates before a final walk through. 

In short, the agent takes on somewhat of a “leadership role” in the transaction and ensures that all the ducks stay in a row until the project is complete.  That agent will hopefully be very fluid and forthcoming with their information, copying the required parties on all communications and creating a “paper trail” of who said what or didn’t offer to fix A, B, or C, so that all the minutiae of the contract can be addressed and fulfilled before the settlement date.  The agent often must wear many hats and quickly learn the communication styles of an entire new set of people in a short period.  One person may not return calls for a week after being contacted.  Another person may go on vacation at the beginning of the process and not return emails for two weeks.  Another person may wish to have daily updates of the progress of the process. 

In this way – an agent quickly learns in each transaction that “culture can eat strategy for breakfast.” Because the agent must adapt to a wide variety of communication styles, learn how to “manage from within”, build support for closing the project by the due date, and somehow keep all the interested parties invested, engaged, and responsive.  

Who you work with matters when picking the right person to represent you in your next transaction – so, just remember that “teamwork makes the dream work!”


Joseph Hudson is a referral agent with RLAH. Reach him at 703-587-0597 or [email protected].

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Advice

My boyfriend is almost perfect

But the sex isn’t mind blowing

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Sex tends to change after spending many years with the same partner. (Photo by Rawpixel . com / Bigstock)

Dear Michael,

I’ve been dating Mark for three years, living together for two, and I’m not sure he’s for me. We get along great but I’m questioning how attracted I am to him.

I was never crazy about him physically but he was such a sweet and smart guy that I wanted to date him.

Sex was never mind-blowing and the longer we’ve been together the more this is bothering me. I wonder if I could find someone who appeals to me more, physically.

On the plus side, I like him a lot. He has good values, shares my religious faith, which is hard to find in another gay guy, is responsible and has a good work ethic. Also, I just have fun with him and he’s always interested to hear what’s on my mind.  He’s an all-around decent guy.

As I’m writing this, I’m thinking that he seems great and that I’m a fool for even questioning our relationship. But all my friends are always talking about the amazing sex they are having, and then I think I’m missing out on a key part of life because my sex life is comparatively lackluster.

I don’t want to settle. But how likely am I to find another guy who is as all-around a good catch as Mark, but with more sexual chemistry?

Michael replies:

I don’t think the right approach is to wonder about your chances for of finding someone better. Anyone you find will have things you aren’t crazy about.

For example, you might find someone whom you’re wildly attracted to sexually, but they’ll bore you or annoy you, or have values you don’t respect.

I understand that you aren’t wildly sexually attracted to Mark. The truth is that it’s extremely unlikely that you would remain wildly sexually attracted to anyone for that long. People tend to get used to each other over time. Sex can remain great, but more from closeness and love than heat and sizzle.

I work with people all the time who wonder if there is someone “better” out there. And I tell them, they’re never going to get through all the possibilities before they die. Instead, how about thinking if the guy you are with is someone you’d like to go with on this journey through life?

Mark’s attributes that you mention sound wonderful to me. After more than 30 years working with folks on relationships, and being in my own 30+ year relationship, I have learned a thing or two about what creates a relationship that is satisfying and good. A decent, kind guy with admirable values is an excellent start. 

The question is, can you live with your sex life not being on an orgasmically hot mind-blowing level? I hope the answer is yes, because sex with anyone you pick is not likely to stay in that sort of realm for long.

Another point to consider: I don’t think you should get too caught up in what your friends are telling you. They may be having amazing sex, but are they all having it with the same long-term partner? As I mentioned, long-term sex can be great, but the excitement tends to be replaced by caring connection over time.

I’ll generalize here for a moment: Because so many gay men have many sexual partners, the kind of sex you have with someone new, whom you’re tremendously attracted to, tends to be glorified among gay men as the gold standard of sex. But it’s not realistic for sex with a long-term partner.

This glorification is a big problem: It leaves gay men who are not having torrid sex with lots of guys feeling like there is something wrong with the sex they are having, that they are missing out on something super fantastic. Just like you are feeling.

If you want a lifetime of ongoing hot sex, I don’t think you should be looking for a relationship. If you are willing to accept sex being a not-always fantastic, but perhaps consistently loving, often good, and occasionally great part of life with a kind decent guy, then Mark might just be the right partner for you after all. 

(Michael Radkowsky, Psy.D. is a licensed psychologist who works with couples and individuals in D.C., Maryland, Virginia, New York, and all PSYPACT states. He can be found at michaelradkowsky.com. All identifying information has been changed for reasons of confidentiality. Have a question? Send it to [email protected].)

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