a&e features
Catching up with Michael Feinstein
Out crooner headlines Strathmore Gala this weekend

Michael Feinstein says the Strathmore is one of the country’s great music halls. He’ll be there this weekend. (Photo by Julia Duresky; courtesy Strathmore)
Strathmore Spring Gala
Saturday, May 12
Michael Feinstein in concert
Cocktails, 5 p.m.
Three-course dinner, 6:15Concert, 9 p.m.
Gala patron tickets: $1,250
Concert only: $45-130
Music Center at Stratmore
5301 Tuckerman Lane
North Bethesda, Md.
strathmore.org
Great American Songbook stalwart Michael Feinstein is at the Strathmore this weekend to headline its annual Spring Gala.
On Saturday night, the long-out crooner will sing along with Broadway singer Laura Osnes and several alums of the Strathmore’s artist-in-resident program.
The gala is a capstone event in the Strathmore’s year-long programming partnership with Feinstein in which they’ve collaborated to “spotlight torchbearers of Great American Song.” Feinstein spoke to the Blade by phone this week from his home in Indiana. His comments have been slightly edited for length.
WASHINGTON BLADE: How is 2018 treating you?
MICHAEL FEINSTEIN: Really great in some ways and in other ways, not so great. I broke my nose in January and I had a hemorrhage on my vocal cord but that’s all in the past and I’m feeling hale and hearty so I like to think I got through the most dramatic part and the rest should be smooth sailing.
BLADE: How did you break your nose?
FEINSTEIN: I walked into an impeccably polished plate of glass.
BLADE: Vocal cord stuff is really scary for a singer. Are you any worse for the wear?
FEINSTEIN: Evidently not. I did a symphony concert yesterday and two of my Lena Horne shows at Lincoln Center and everything seems to be full steam ahead so I’m very grateful and lucky I guess. All is good.
BLADE: What do you have planned for the Strathmore?
FEINSTEIN: It’s gonna be a fun night because, of course, it’s their gala and I love being associated with the Strathmore because it’s such a great venue to perform in. … The program will be with a 17-pice big band and the musical director is Tedd Firth who is one of the great jazz pianists and arrangers of our time. So it’ll be a celebration of American popular song including, of course, some Gershwin and then I’m gonna do a Sinatra medley that’s just a swinging, fun thing. Then Laura Osnes is a special guest. She’ll be doing some songs and we’ll be doing a duet together …. so it’ll be a fun, celebratory, rich musical experience I think.
BLADE: Why do you work to find young people to take up the cause of American standards? To your knowledge, does anything like that happen in other genres of music?
FEINSTEIN: Well, for a number of years I’ve been mindful of the fact that any art or music only stays alive if there are audiences for it and people who are educated in it and people who bring it to the attention of others and because we live in a time when there is so little arts education in schools, it’s up to all of us who care about it to do what we can to preserve it and bring it to the next generation. … The arts are incredibly transformative. They change our lives and it’s an essential part of what makes life livable.
BLADE: But why do some genres need this more than others? You think of Motown or any classic rock and nobody really has to work to keep it alive. Are you aware of similar efforts for polka or Dixieland or any other type of music more popular in yesteryear?
FEINSTEIN: Well certainly the American songbook needs it because the more people who learn about it, it becomes part of their lives and they’ll share it with others. A lot of contemporary artists do American songbook songs in their sets. It’s not like it exists in a vacuum. I remember when Lady Gaga sang “Someone to Watch Over Me” on a show. Many artists sing these songs and many thousands of artists have sang “Summertime.” So to me it’s always about making people more aware of it.
BLADE: You’ve done so many albums. Which was the hardest to sequence?
FEINSTEIN: It’s always challenging because you have a bunch of songs and then you have to think about which order makes the most sense. I like to think of it like telling a story like a play or a movie. It can be tough but I don’t remember one being especially more difficult than another. I’ve made many different types of albums and they all present their own challenges.
BLADE: Does sequencing sometimes affect arrangements and transitions?
FEINSTEIN: Absolutely. There are times I’ve changed the beginning of a track or cut part of it or extended it. Also the time between tracks is significant, but of course a lot of people don’t listen to music sequentially anymore, they pick and choose in whatever medium they use so … in some ways it’s a lost art.
BLADE: Do you keep in touch with Cheyenne Jackson? Have you seen any of his TV stuff? (Feinstein and Jackson released a duet album in 2014)
FEINSTEIN: Yes, I am in touch with Cheyenne. We performed together about, oh, four-five months ago and he wants to do more musical performances but his acting career keeps him well occupied. He’s a wonderful human being and Jason, his husband, as well. They’re a great couple and he’s a major talent. He’s one of the finest voices of our time. He’s got extraordinary range and versatility and, of course, charisma. He’s deeply gifted and just a nice person to be around.
BLADE: When we last spoke in 2015, you mentioned a multi-CD project you were working on but couldn’t say much about. What was that and is it still in the works?
FEINSTEIN: I was working on recording the complete songs of George Gershwin, which is like 800 published songs, and that’s what I was starting to embark on. … We decided against it for various reasons. … The more we explored it, the more we realized it was more interesting as an idea than it would have been in execution. But I’m doing a Gershwin country duets album now and it’s very exciting. Right now I’m working on a track with Dolly Parton and we’re going to be doing a track soon with Brad Paisley and that’ll be tremendous fun to put together.
BLADE: How often do the holy grails in your genre turn up? Is it fairly uncommon?
FEINSTEIN: Well things do turn up from time to time. (There are) Bing Crosby/George Gershwin demos from 1930 or 1931 that have never turned up but they might. I know of the existence of one Gershwin recording that I haven’t been able to get my hands on yet but I’m working on it. And sometimes things turn up that we didn’t even know existed, which is fun. I recently found some other Crosby recordings that were fun to discover from radio and a number of years ago, I discovered a bunch of lost Crosby tracks. Actually I’m a trustee of the Judy Garland estate and I just found about a dozen recordings of her from the 103-s that were part of her own record collection that were pretty extraordinary performances that, for the most part, have never been heard. So now the trust is figuring out the best way to release them. … But it’s always thrilling to find things like that.
BLADE: You’ve talked about rescuing scores from dumpsters. How did you happen to be in the right place at the right time?
FEINSTEIN: I have to ascribe it to karma or luck or fate, if you will. I had the experience a number of times of stumbling upon something right before it was slated for destruction even though my timing sometimes has been off. A couple years ago, I just missed gaining possession of an entire office full of music. When I went to collect it, I was told it been destroyed the day before. So my timing hasn’t always been perfect.
BLADE: Why was Hollywood so cavalier with its history years ago?
FEINSTEIN: Because the thing that mattered to Hollywood was the film itself, not the ancillary products such as scores or whatever was used to make the finished film. They didn’t understand the importance or value of the music so it was jettisoned. There are very few studios that kept their scores. Warner Brothers did for the most part. Fox kept a lot of them and Paramount did but the big destruction, of course, is MGM thanks to a man named James Aubrey who very specifically destroyed those assets and many others. They’re businesses, not museum or archives. They don’t exist to preserve, they exist to make money and if they don’t make money from something, they don’t consider it valuable, not understanding that there was not only financial value in these things but also cultural and historical value. … But that’s the way of the world.
BLADE: Is it possible to recreate a score from a recording? Is that even a thing?
FEINSTEIN: It does work but only if the person doing it has the expertise to accomplish it. There are people who’ve done it and done lousy jobs. Then there’s people like John Wilson in England who with a couple associates has impeccably restored scores that are exact. But the number of people on the planet who can do that is extremely limited. Probably no more, and I’m speaking generously, than five or six. … It’s possible but it’s very difficult.
BLADE: It has ebbed, but there was a period where many pop artists — Joni Mitchell, Cyndi Lauper, of course Rod Stewart — were releasing standards albums. Did you hear very many of them? Which was your favorite?
FEINSTEIN: I liked some of the arrangements on Joni Mitchell’s (“Both Sides Now,” 2000). I remember years ago, Annie Lennox did an album on which she recorded a Harry Warren song called “Keep Me Young and Beautiful” from 1932 (on 1992’s “Diva”). I actually think it’s more fun to discover an old standard in the midst of a pop album. Like I remember as a kid, I discovered this Steely Dan album “Pretzel Logic” and on it was a song called “East St. Louis Toodle-Oo,” an instrumental, which it wasn’t until years later that I discovered they did it on guitar and pop instruments but it was an exact copy of a 1928 Duke Ellington recording. So that’s always a kick.
BLADE: You met so many cool people of the 20th century. Did you ever by chance meet Kate Smith and how do you think her recordings of the standards have held up?
FEINSTEIN: Kate Smith is one of the great underestimated singers from today’s perspective. She was a dazzling talent. I did not meet her but she had a unique and formidable legacy because she was such a huge star on the radio going back to the 1930s and she had a tremendous recorded output that started in 1926 and ended 50 years later. She could sing just about anything and when she started making pop records in the ‘60s, mainly with Peter Matz, who was at the same time working with Barbra Streisand, some of them were great and some were mawkish because some of the more psychedelic songs didn’t translate well to her. But when she took some of the Broadway material, she was incomparable. Like her recording of “If He Walked Into my Life” from “Mame” is fantastic. Her recording of “What Kind of Fool Am I” from her live Carnegie Hall album is dazzling. If you watch on YouTube some of her TV appearances from the ‘70s, she sings a lot of these songs tremendously well. One of my favorites is “You and Me Against the World,” which is like a three-act play the way she sings it. It just tears your heart out.
BLADE: Why do some great figures from those years — Garland, Elvis, whomever — hold up, yet people like Kate Smith is a good example, who were equally well known at the time, you mention them to a millennial and you get a blank stare?
FEINSTEIN: Well, you know, Garland and Presley had volatile and tragic lives. A lot of people you mention Judy Garland, they say, “Oh, she was such a mess.” A lot of people who know the name, don’t necessarily know anything about her art.
BLADE: So you’re saying we have a macabre fascination with tragedy and somebody who had a nice, stable life, for whatever reason, that doesn’t capture the public imagination nearly so well?
FEINSTEIN: Sort of, yes.
BLADE: How do you like the acoustics at the Strathmore?
FEINSTEIN: Oh, it’s sensational. It really is one of the great performing venues. That’s something that really cannot be planned. Of course there’s a multi-million dollar industry of acoustic science but even with all that, there’s another unknowable factor. … I’ve been in brand new buildings that are supposed to be state of the art and they just don’t work. The Strathmore has the gratifying combination of being tremendously opulant and beautiful and comfortable and it creates a connection for the audience and the performer that’s unique and special. It’s a real jewel and a place to be treasured.
BLADE: What’s the gayest tchotchke or memento in your home?
FEINSTEIN: Oh golly. Well, there are so many, how do you choose? (laughs) I have a lot of Judy Garland mementos and I have things from Liza. Let me think. When Terrence and I got married (in 2008), which was in our home, Liza went into my office, which is in my house, and on one of the doors it has a name tag that says Mr. Feinstein that I probably took from a dressing room, so it’s on a closet door and it looks like an entrance to a room. She wrote on it “not anymore” and her name and the date. I said, “What’s that?” And she opened the door and said, “Don’t you get it? In the closet — not anymore,” because that was the date of our marriage. I guess that would be pretty gay.
a&e features
D.C. springs back to life with new, returning events
Cherry blossoms, Rehoboth season kickoff, and more on tap
Longer and warmer days are back meaning: It’s time to get out of the house and enjoy Washington D.C.’s many events. Below are a few to check out this spring.
The National Museum of Women in the Arts will host “Making their Mark: Works from the Shah Garg Collection” until Sunday, July 26. This exhibition illustrates women artists’ vital role in abstraction, considers historical contributions, formal and material breakthroughs and intergenerational relationships among women artists over the last eight decades. For more details, visit. NMWA’s website.
Art in the Attic will host a pop-up on Saturday, March 14 at 6 p.m. at 1012 Madison St., Alexandria, Va. There will be a variety of vendors selling products across different modes of art. For more details, visit Eventbrite.
Play Play will host “Indoor Recess – The art of play” on Sunday, March 15 at 2 p.m. This event will embody classic recess energy, including opportunities to build and experience community and connections through games, movement, art stations, and creative freedom. Tickets are $12.51 and can be purchased on Eventbrite.
Spark Social will host “Gay Bar Crawl on U Street” on Friday, March 20 at 7:30 p.m. This will be a fun night out in gay D.C. with other gay people, whether you’re visiting D.C., new to the area, or just looking to expand your social circle. Many crawlers have formed lasting friendships and even romantic relationships after just one night out. Tickets are $35.88 and are available on Eventbrite.
Creative Suitland Arts Center will host “EFFERVESCENT: House of Swann” on Saturday, May 30 at 7 p.m. This will be a gay, good time where we will celebrate love, joy, wellness, and visibility for the LGBTQIA+ community. Tickets start at $17.85 and can be purchased on Eventbrite.
SWAG Works DC will host “Unapologetically Her” on Saturday, March 14 at 2 p.m. at 701 E St., S.E. This event is a powerful celebration of womanhood, resilience, creativity, and self-expression in honor of Women’s History Month. This all-women exhibition highlights the diverse voices, stories, and artistic perspectives of women who create boldly, live authentically, and stand confidently in their truth. This event is free and more details are available on Eventbrite.
9:30 Club will host “Gimme Gimme Disco: A Dance Party Inspired by ABBA” on Saturday, March 14 at 6 p.m. There will also be a “Donna Summer Power Hour – The Queen of Disco” segment during this event. It’ll be one hour of music with no skips. Tickets are available on 9:30 Club’s website.
Harder Better Faster Stronger will host “Heated Rivalry Rave” on Friday, March 20 at 9 p.m. at Howard Theatre. This event is open to all ages. Tickets are available on the theater’s website.
CAMP Rehoboth hosts its 25th annual Women’s+ FEST, April 9-12 in Rehoboth Beach, Del. Entertainers include headliner Mina Hartong, a comedian, storyteller, and founder of Lez Out Loud; and singer Yoli Mayor. There are dances, dinners, pickleball, and much more. Details and tickets at camprehoboth.org.
Also in Rehoboth Beach, the Washington Blade’s 19th annual Summer Kickoff Party is set for Friday, May 15 featuring Ashley Biden, who will accept an award on behalf of her brother Beau. State Rep. Claire Snyder-Hall will also speak. More speakers and the venue to be announced soon.
The annual D.C. Cherry Blossom Festival kicks off March 21 at DAR Constitution Hall and culminates with Petalpalooza on April 4, the day-long, outdoor street party with music and art, stretching across Navy Yard, and ending with fireworks over the Anacostia River.
a&e features
‘Queer Eye’ star Dorriene Diggs on life before and after appearing on hit show
Emotional January episode highlighted 40-year love affair with partner
Dorriene Diggs, 70, whose 40-year relationship with her domestic partner, Diane until Diane’s passing in 2020, the couple’s tense relationship with their respective parents, and Dorriene’s current living arrangement with her straight sister Jo, were the focus of a final season episode of the popular TV series “Queer Eye.”
In a recent interview with the Washington Blade, Diggs told of how her appearance on the show has impacted her life. She elaborated on the many aspects of her life experiences that she told to the five “Queer Eye” co-hosts who interviewed her and her sister in their D.C. home.
Although her parents and her partner’s parents, who have since passed away, were not accepting of their relationship, Diggs has said most of her family members at this time reacted positively to her appearance on the show.
“They loved it,” she told the Blade. “Yes, everybody that saw the show called me and said they loved the show, they really enjoyed themselves watching it.”
Through an arrangement with D.C.’s Rainbow History Project, the “Queer Eye” show featuring Diggs and her sister was presented in a special screening on a large video screen at the D.C. History Center in January.
“Dorriene, a 70-year-old Black lesbian living in Washington, D.C., had spent decades building a life with her partner while navigating silence within her own family,” a “Queer Eye” statement announcing the episode on Diggs states.
“The Fab Five did not arrive to introduce Dorriene to herself, but to help ensure her story was finally heard in full,” the statement says.
Blade: Can you tell us how your appearance on the “Queer Eye” program came about? How did they find out about you?
Diggs: You know, I still don’t have all the details. I think it was my niece, Missy. And she knows somebody there from “Queer Eye.”
Blade: So, did you first learn about it when someone from “Queer Eye” contacted you?
Diggs: No, the “Queer Eye” guy knocked on my bedroom door and started talking. I was in my bedroom watching television and the next thing I know my door opened up and there was Karamo [Karamo Brown, one of the “Queer Eye” co-hosts] with his big black cowboy hat on, opening the door grinning. … They contacted Jo first. And when they came here, they realized there was a gay woman in the house, too. Because my name was not mentioned at first. After they came here, they learned about me, because when Missy reached out to them, she reached out to them about Jo. But that doesn’t bother me. This was all about Jo in the beginning, and not me. … They started talking to me and Jo. And he said, Dorriene, ‘you’ve done so much for so many people, it’s time for someone to do something for you.’ That’s what they said. He said, ‘this is the day we’re doing it for you.’
And so, they put me and my sister up in a hotel for a week. They gave us a personal driver to take us anywhere we wanted to go. And then they took us to a bunch of places. We didn’t know why they were doing all of this. We had no idea that they were renovating the house and renovating our bedrooms. We had no idea.
Blade: What was your reaction when you saw the home renovation?
Diggs: It was amazing. And they bought us all new complete wardrobes – clothes, shoes. But most of the stuff they got me I gave away to a women’s shelter. But it was so nice. Actually, to meet the guys. I’ve been watching the show for 10 years. I have watched it from the beginning. And actually, it brought me and my sister closer – really. We’re closer now than we’ve ever been. She’s my baby sister – not the baby, but next to the baby. She’s the younger one.
Blade: What has been the reaction to your appearance on the show? Do more people now recognize you?
Diggs: Yes, yes. I’m getting phone calls and it’s almost like I’m a celebrity. And I don’t want people to make a fuss over me. All the things I did I did from the heart. I really did. And I don’t want people to think I’m more than I am. I’m just a good Christian woman that believes in giving back.
And I do. God gives me help giving. That’s what I do. And I don’t want anything in return from anyone. You know, because I know what it means to not to have. I know what it means to go to bed hungry, with no food. Going to school with holes in your shoes. I know that. I know that feeling. I’ve been there. And I promised myself as a kid I would never live like this again. And when I got bold enough to leave home, I left home at 14, and I moved in with a drag queen. Damen was his name.
Blade: Did your appearance on the show change your life and your relationship with your sister?
Diggs: Yeah, yeah, it actually did. We are actually closer now than we’ve ever been. Because, like I said, I moved away from home early and I never went back. My parents had a problem with my lifestyle. They really did. My mom looked at me with such hatred. When I was old enough to say goodbye, I never looked back. And to come back around now in the last few years after Diane died, that’s when I came back here.
And at one point I stayed with my nephew Todd and his wife – but he got killed in a car accident. I couldn’t stay at his house anymore. So, then I called Jo and told her I need to get out of here. And without hesitating she came and picked me up and brought me to her home. And I’ve been here ever since.
Blade: Can you tell a little about when it came about and how you met your partner?
Diggs: We lived on 18th Avenue in condos. I just bought one. Hers was above mine. I bought the bottom one. When my brother came over, she was getting out of her car. She was driving a Vega. And I turned to my brother and I said – this is the God’s honest truth – I said Keith, that’s the woman I’m going to spend the rest of my life with. Just like that. And he started laughing. He said, girl you’re crazy. I said I know I’m crazy, Keith, but I’m telling you that woman right there is who I’m going to spend the rest of my life with.
Blade: And when was that?
Diggs: It was 1980 actually. And then I started going to the laundry room to do my laundry. So I started talking to her. She said, ‘I’m not speaking to you.’ Isaid ‘why not?’ She said ‘because you’re nothing but a female gigolo.’ And I said I’m not dating anymore. I’m waiting for you. ‘No, you’re too fast for me.’ I said, ‘well, I’m not giving up.’
And I didn’t give up. So, I was playing an album one day and she knocked on the door and asked what I was playing, I think. I said you liked that. She said yeah. I said OK, I’ll bring it upstairs and we can listen to it together. So, when I went up there to her apartment that day and whenever I went up there, I never left.
Blade: So, your partner’s name was Diane?
Diggs: Yes, Ruth Diane Robinson. But she hated the name Ruth. So, the only people who called her Ruth were at work, the people she worked with. Everybody else called her Diane.
Blade: And how many years were you together?
Diggs: Forty. Forty years together
Blade: And where were you living with her most of the time?
Diggs: We lived in Hagerstown the longest, Hagerstown, Md. And so, if Diane hadn’t died I probably still would have been in our house in Hagerstown.
Blade: Can you tell me a little about what you were doing career wise during those years?
Diggs: I do computers. I used to do computers. And before that I cooked. I love to cook like my mom. And then I wanted to do something else. So, I taught myself computers. I taught myself how to build computers and stuff. So, then I got my own computer business called Ida One Computer Consulting. And so, we helped build computers for people.
Blade: Around when was this, in the 1980a or 1990s?
Diggs: Yes, in the 1980s. I think I stopped I would say around ’96, when I stopped. Because we both said we were going to retire at 55. And we did. We both retired at 55. And then she started diabetes. Every day I had to give her an injection because she was afraid of needles. She couldn’t give it to herself. So, I had to give her an injection every day One time, I don’t remember when, she had a mild stroke. And I had to take care of her. I’ve always taken care of her. And I don’t regret it. I never regretted it. It’s taking care of the one you love.
Blade: When was it that she passed away?
Diggs: In 2020. I found her on the kitchen floor.
Blade: How did your family and your extended family react to your relationship with Diane?
Diggs: Well, her family, oh my God, they hated me – her mother the worst. Because I put a stop to them treating her really bad. I told her mother – I said never in my life – my mother raised me well. Never disrespect someone’s mother. I said but this time I’m going to disrespect you because you are going to start treating Diane like you ought to. This is a wonderful woman and you and your son and you it’s always about your son. You never, ever say anything good about your daughter.
I said it isn’t going to happen again. You’re never going to disrespect her again. I said you take a damn good look at her because you’ll never see her again. I meant that. I grabbed Diane. I said it’s time to go. They don’t care about you.
Blade: Can you tell a little about your family?
Diggs: Yeah, I’m a triplet sister. So, it’s Dorriene, Chorine, and Chrissy — we are the triplets. So, my mom had a set of twins and a set of triplets within nine months. One of the twins died at birth. So, the other twin is Margaret.
Blade: So then how did your family react to you and Jo being on “Queer Eye”?
Diggs: Most of my family really had no problem with it.
Blade: Were you out to them?
Diggs: Oh yeah. I was never in the closet. I didn’t give a damn what people felt about me, sweetheart. I really didn’t. I didn’t care. Because I was going to be me. And for people who didn’t like it, I wasn’t living for them, I was living for me. I’ve always been out. I had a brother who was also gay, Marvin. God rest his soul, too. But he stayed in the closet. He was in the closet until he was about 55 years old.
But everything I said on the show was the truth – my account. The things that I went through with family … You can’t tell me how I felt. If they try to make mom and dad out as perfect, they weren’t perfect. They were the worst parents. That’s my account of it.
So yes, everything I said on that interview was the truth. That’s one thing people who know me know – I do not lie.
Blade: What are some of the things you like to do these days?
Diggs: I’m a sports lover. I love sports. So, my baseball season is getting ready to get started. Baseball is my favorite sport. Yes, I love baseball. I like the statistics of it. And watching the guys. I wish they had a women’s professional baseball team, honestly. … I’m a D.C. sports fan. The Wizards, the Nationals, the Mystics, the Caps. … And see, I’m a diehard Redskins fan and I refuse to call them the Commanders. They’re the Redskins. They will always be the Redskins to me. I love my sports teams.
Blade: Can you tell a little about the history of the house where you and Jo now live and where they did the filming of the “Queer Eye” show?
Diggs: Jo had a house on 17th Street, I think it was Northeast because it was over there by H Street, N.E. And I think somebody wanted to buy her house. I don’t know why she moved. So, she found this house. Because she wanted to buy something where she could buy a house straight out. She didn’t want a mortgage on another house.
Blade: What are your thoughts on being on the last season of “Queer Eye?”
Diggs: Yeah, we were the last ones. We took it out with a bang, me and Jo. That was it.
Blade: Can you say how you and Jo appearing on the show impacted your life?
Diggs: I don’t know. I’m the same person. I’ve been getting calls from people saying I saw you on the show. And friends who I haven’t seen in years have been calling. … So yeah, the show, people I haven’t seen and talked to in years have been calling. I think that’s a good thing.
a&e features
35 years after ‘Truth or Dare,’ Slam is still dancing
Salim Gauwloos on Madonna, HIV, and why he almost didn’t audition for Blond Ambition Tour
Most gay men of a certain age remember “the kiss.”
It was the moment Madonna’s dancers Salim Gauwloos and Gabriel Trupin locked lips in the hit 1991 documentary film “Truth or Dare,” which is celebrating its 35th anniversary this spring.
The kiss was hot, but what made it groundbreaking is that it appeared in a mainstream Hollywood movie that screened in suburban multiplexes across the country. This wasn’t an obscure art house film. The movie, and tour on which it was based, received months of breathless media attention all over the world for bold expressions of female empowerment and queer visibility. Madonna was threatened with arrest in Toronto for simulating masturbation on stage and Pope John Paul II urged Catholics to boycott the show, triggering a media firestorm.
“Truth or Dare” was billed as a behind-the-scenes documentary of the tour, but it quickly became clear that the real star of the show wasn’t Madonna, but rather her colorful troupe of seven backup dancers, six of whom identified as gay: Kevin Stea, Carlton Wilborn, Luis Xtravaganza Camacho, Jose Gutierez Xtravaganza, Gauwloos, and Trupin; Oliver Crumes III identifies as straight.
We saw them party and march in the New York City Pride parade. They were unabashedly queer at a dangerous time — before protease inhibitors began to stem the AIDS plague and before most celebrities and politicians embraced the gay community in any real way. Being out in 1991 carried major risks to career and reputation.
Enter Gauwloos, one of those brave dancers who vogued his way into the hearts of countless gay men entranced by his handsome looks, his stage presence, and dance skills.
Gauwloos — known then and now as “Slam”— sat down with the Blade to talk Madonna, the lasting impact of “Truth or Dare,” the public disclosure of his HIV status, and plans for a new book on his life.
His story is fascinating — from growing up in Europe to dancing in New York to landing the gig of a lifetime with Madonna. He performed on that tour while secretly HIV positive and went without medical treatment for 10 years because he was living in the United States as an undocumented immigrant. Not even Madonna knew of his HIV status. Two other dancers on the tour were also HIV positive but no one talked about it. Ironically, Madonna was singing “Express Yourself” and advocating for condom use during her concerts yet backstage three of her dancers were secretly positive.
“A lot of people were dying so I wasn’t going to tell Madonna I had HIV,” said Slam, now 57. “And the others didn’t either. It wasn’t the moment to do it. She used to make speeches about Keith Haring and AIDS and I thought it’s going to be me next.”
Gabriel Trupin died of AIDS in 1995. Slam was diagnosed at age 18 in 1987, a frightening time when a positive test result often meant a death sentence. He booked the “Blond Ambition Tour” at age 21 after moving to New York. His friends encouraged him to audition but Slam resisted because he wasn’t a big Madonna fan.
“It was crazy, everyone wanted that job,” he said, “but I wanted to dance with Janet Jackson and Paula Abdul.” He listened to his friends and shortly after the audition, Slam received a call from Madonna herself inviting him to join the tour.
“We all wanted to be stars but not even Madonna knew how big that tour would become. The way it was choreographed and directed, the stars aligned. … It never looks dated even today.”

The world tour kicked off in Japan in April 1990 then moved to the United States and Europe, stirring controversy wherever it went. There was the iconic cone bra; the aforementioned simulated masturbation during “Like a Virgin”; and religious imagery that offended many Catholic groups and the Vatican.
And the controversy didn’t end with the tour. Cameras were rolling throughout the tour for what Slam thought would be a “video memory” for Madonna. But as the tour unfolded, director Alek Keshishian reportedly became more interested in what was happening behind the scenes so plans for mere tour footage were expanded into a full documentary.
“We were young and partying and didn’t really know what was going on,” Slam said. “You live in this celebrity bubble and you sign a paper – I don’t even know what I signed.”
In 1992, Kevin, Oliver, and Gabriel sued Madonna for invasion of privacy and fraud claiming she used some footage without their consent. They claim they were told nothing would be included in the film that they didn’t want to be seen. In one specific incident, Gabriel alleged that he told producers he didn’t want the scene of him kissing Slam to be in the film as he wasn’t fully out.
“Gabriel was forcibly outed,” in the movie, Kevin said in a 2016 interview.
Slam did not join his colleagues in the lawsuit.
“I couldn’t sue because I was illegal but I wasn’t ever going to sue,” Slam said. “I’m not a suing kind of person. But good for them, they fought for it and won. A lot of people don’t have the balls to sue Madonna.” The suit was settled two years later for an undisclosed sum.
“We were all conflicted about the kiss,” he said with a laugh. “The kiss, oh my God, my boyfriend is going to kill me! Belgian stress!”
Beyond worrying about his boyfriend’s reaction, Slam had concerns about the impact of being openly gay on his modeling career.
“In 1990, you couldn’t get high fashion campaigns as an openly gay model,” he said. “I was worried about that. I couldn’t get a campaign because I was gay. My agency told me to say I was straight and it was just a game.”
In 2016, pegged to the 25th anniversary of “Truth or Dare,” the surviving six dancers filmed a documentary about their lives post-Madonna titled “Strike A Pose.” In it, Slam publicly revealed his HIV status for the first time in an emotional scene with his former colleagues.
“I found the strength to tell the world I have HIV,” he recalls. “I was scared but I felt brave. The outcome and messages were beautiful. After I saw ‘Strike A Pose,’ I knew we gave people hope. And not just for gay people.”
He was infected in 1987 but didn’t get treated until 1997. After the tour ended, he said he went into a depression and his agency dropped him.
“I was partying too much after the tour,” he recalls. “I made a decision to live as an illegal alien.” In 1997, Slam collapsed and was rushed to the hospital with pneumonia.
“They started treating me and thank God the new HIV drugs were out, the cocktails, it took me a couple months to get better.”
Madonna didn’t participate in “Strike A Pose” and Slam said he hasn’t seen or spoken to her since the end of the tour. He said he had no idea of the impact “Truth or Dare” would have.
“You look at this movie in 1991 and you don’t think it’s going to be such a big thing and 35 years later it’s still helping people,” he said. “It was helpful for people who felt alone at that time. It was such an important documentary.
“I don’t think younger gay people realize how important Madonna was to gay and queer visibility — she was a big part of it. We showed the world it’s OK to be gay and that was the great message of this movie.”
He noted that, decades later, many of his friends have transgender kids and that queer culture is represented in much of mainstream pop culture.
“It’s amazing how far we’ve come,” he said. “I know we’ll always be marginalized but we have come so far. I’m really proud of our community. The current nightmare will be over and I do believe that things will get better.”
Referencing President Trump’s attacks on the LGBTQ community and crackdown on immigration, Slam described the situation in the U.S. today as “sad.”
“Everything is such a mess,” he said. “Some of these people have lived here 30-40 years and they take you out of your home. I can’t even imagine. It breaks my heart. When I was illegal it was a different story.”
Slam met his husband, Facundo Gabba, who’s from Argentina, in 2000, and he helped him get a legal case together to win citizenship. He filed a case in 2001 and was told there was a 99 percent chance he wouldn’t be permitted to stay in the United States because they weren’t allowing HIV-positive immigrants to remain in the country. But he got his green card anyway in 2005 and became a U.S. citizen in 2012.
Today, Slam and Gabba live in Brooklyn, though they travel a lot because “I can’t take the cold.” The couple married in Argentina in 2010 and in the U.S. in 2016.
Slam is still dancing and working as a choreographer. He’s teaching at a contemporary dance festival in Vienna in July and even offers online lessons via Salimdans.com.
As a longtime HIV survivor, Slam is dedicated to a healthful lifestyle.
“You have to keep moving; when you move you stay healthy,” he says. “Dance heals everything. I do yoga, I eat healthy and clean as possible. I don’t watch much TV … I try to stay healthy and positive. If I absorb all of the negativity I would be sick.”

In addition to his ongoing work in dance and choreography, Slam is in the early stages of writing a book about his extraordinary life and pioneering career.
“I always knew I had a book inside of me. I want to talk about my HIV status. I know I can inspire more people. I want to tell even more secrets in the book; secrets are a poison so I want to tell everything.”
Among those secrets, he notes, is a desire to write about his strict Muslim father and the years he spent as an undocumented immigrant in America.
“Those are the things I want to talk about, the struggles. It’s a love story, hope and resilience. I know it will help people.”
As for his friends from the tour, Slam says he remains in contact with Gabriel’s mother and José Xtravaganza is his best friend. Baltimore’s Center Stage theater is currently developing a new musical about Xtravaganza’s life. And Slam said he occasionally talks to Oliver, though “he still can’t pronounce Sandra Bernhard’s name.”
At the end of our interview, Slam indulged a round a rapid fire questions:
• Favorite song to perform in the “Blond Ambition” tour? “Express Yourself.”
• Aside from Madonna, who was your favorite artist you worked with? Toni Braxton in “Aida” on Broadway.
• Favorite Madonna song? “Live to Tell”
• Favorite Madonna video? “Bedtime Stories”
• What’s more stressful: performing in a concert or performing on the VMAs? “Both, because we always had to be perfect.”
• Did you go to Madonna’s recent “Celebration” tour? “I didn’t see the show but I saw clips online.”
• What do you remember most about performing “Vogue” at the VMAs? “It was nerve-racking for them to flip those fans.”
• When was the last time you vogued? “I teach classes so a couple weeks ago.”
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