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Two new books from longtime LGBTQ advocates not to miss

Besen on fight against conversion therapy; Basile revisits founding of HRC

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(Book cover images courtesy of the publishers)

This fall brings two new important books from leading LGBTQ advocates, Wayne Besen, the leading figure in the fight against so-called ā€˜ex-gayā€™ therapy; and Vic Basile, a longtime LGBTQ rights and Democratic Party activist.

ā€œLies with a Straight Face: Exposing the Cranks and Cons Inside the ā€˜Ex-Gayā€™ Industry,ā€ by Besen revisits the fight against conversion therapy. 

ā€œI wrote this book to ensure that future generations know the truth about how conversion practices damage mental health, break apart families, and never work,ā€ Besen said in a statement. All royalties from book sales will go to Truth Wins Out, to help its efforts to fight the ā€œex-gayā€ industry. Book release date is National Coming Out Day, Oct. 11. Visit waynebesen.com for more information and for a link to pre-order.

Below is an excerpt from the book:

Weird Weekend: Journey into Manhood

Twenty-four-year-old Matt Ashcroft traveled from a small town in Ontario, Canada to the woods of New Hope, Pennsylvania to attend Journey into Manhoodā€™s (JiM) weekend retreat. It was a 48-hour ā€œex-gayā€ camp experience, that was supposed to put him on the path to heterosexuality. 

Not long after he provided his John Hancock for a non-sexual experience, Matt heard the words heā€™ll never forget. ā€œDon’t mind me if I have a boner,” a 50-year old man who Matt says ā€œsmelled like cat peeā€ intoned. The older gentleman was assigned to be Mattā€™s cuddle partner. The idea was to serve as a surrogate father, offering love and affection through touch that dad supposedly withheld. 

When the weekend commenced, lights were dimmed in a large room, creating an atmosphere of mystery and foreboding. The campers were disoriented, with their personal items having been taken from them immediately upon arrival. 

ā€œWe didn’t even have watches,ā€ Matt explained. ā€œWe didn’t have cell phones. We had to rely on the sun to tell time. We had no sense of time. We just followed direction from the leaders that were there.ā€

Most of those who signed up came from stern religious communities where they had very limited access to out gay men. Far away from home, they suddenly found themselves in the forest, surrounded by similar guys with raging hormones. The pent up, closeted sexual energy, whether acted upon or not, was palpable, and lay beneath the surface.  

Matt nervously peered at his malodorous cuddle partner. They were instructed to attempt the ā€œmotorcycle positionā€. The much older stranger would sit behind Matt and hold him, as if they were riding a Harley down the highway. 

Awkwardly, the guys crouched into position. Matt squirmed and tried not to breathe, though his partnerā€™s stale cat urine aroma gently wafted into his traumatized nostril. He could feel the mature strangerā€™s member inflating like a birthday balloon, poking and prodding into his backside. 

What kind of ā€œstraight campā€ was this? Matt thought.   

Abba Dabba Doo

Arthur Abba Goldberg was out of prison and out of luck. The disbarred attorney and former Wall Street conman groped to discover the next chapter in his sordid life. He was forbidden from practicing law and banished from the financial industry, so it was unclear how he would make a living. Suddenly, like a revelation from God, it was all too obvious. 

His son had come out as gay, so Goldberg would opportunistically capitalize on his familyā€™s situation to cash in. He recruited Elaine Berk, who also had a gay son, to pose together as ā€œexpertsā€ who could cure homosexuality. In 1999, they started Jews Offering New Alternatives to Homosexuality (JONAH), in Jersey City, as the vehicle for their scam. 

To add a whiff of legitimacy, Goldberg authored, Light in the Closet: Torah, Homosexuality, and the Power to Change, which mostly cribbed NARTHā€™s fringe ideas and debunked theories. Additionally, Goldberg became the Executive Secretary of NARTH and President of Positive Alternatives to Homosexuality (PATH), a coalition of ā€œex-gayā€ groups promoting ā€œnon-gay alternatives to homosexual lifestyles.ā€  

In terms of viability, there was pent up demand in the Orthodox Jewish Community for JONAHā€™s product. The already existing ā€œpray away the gayā€ programs were geared towards Christians, offering Jesus as the answer. With an increase in the number of LGBTQ Orthodox Jews coming out every day, flummoxed family members and rabbis searched for answers on how to deal with this ā€œabomination.ā€ Goldberg and Berk would happily fill the vacuum, unethically profiting from other peoplesā€™ confusion and pain. 

There was one sticky problem that could potentially derail the whole scam.  The name Arthur Abba Goldberg was unique. An online search would immediately reveal that he was a criminal mastermind who had done hard time for heinous crimes. The answer to his existential dilemma was simpler than one might imagine. He simply dropped the ā€œAbbaā€ from his name, and became one of the seemingly countless men named Arthur Goldberg, rendering himself virtually unsearchable. With a new identity and innovative swindle, Goldberg, along with Berk, put out a shingle. The legendary conman was back in business.

 The ā€˜Ex-Gayā€™ Heyday

The discoveries could be startling. Dan Scobey would stumble upon relics from his fiancĆ© Randy Thomasā€™ disturbing past. The man he loved deeply, and affectionally held hands with during our interview, had not too long ago been the chief lobbyist and former Vice President of Exodus International.    

ā€œYou know whatā€™s fun,ā€ Scobey told me? ā€œWhen you move in with someone and you start making your own space, and you start putting some of their things away to make room for your things. You come across framed pictures of your partner in a tuxedo, and your like, ā€˜that guy heā€™s with looks so familiar. Oh my God, thatā€™s Karl Rove. [George W. Bushā€™s political guru] That, goes in the bottom of the closet!ā€™ā€ Scobey joked.

Today, Randy Thomas (now Scobey) embodies the titanic failure of the worldā€™s largest ā€œex-gayā€ ministry. At its peak in 2012, Exodus International had 251 member agencies. Its lobbyists strategized with the most powerful political leaders in the land. Exodus was part of the secretive Arlington Group, which was comprised of Americaā€™s most influential social conservatives. This included former Indiana Governor and eventual Vice President Mike Pence and Donald Trumpā€™s future political strategist Kellyanne Conway. Exodus was also a member of the DC Group, the Religious Rightā€™s B-Team, consisting of hardcore anti-gay zealots, such as Peter LaBarbera and Robert Knight. 

In 2006, the ā€œex-gayā€ industry reached its apex. Then-President George W. Bush hosted Randy Thomas and Exodus President Alan Chambers at the White House. Their role was to trumpet their ā€œex-gayā€ identity in support of Bushā€™s campaign to pass the odious Federal Marriage Amendment. This unsuccessful effort attempted to change the United States Constitution to ban same-sex marriage nationwide. Thomas now looks back at this epoch in his life with profound shame and regret. 

ā€œAt the time, I was so proud. I was like, ā€˜Momma, I’m going to the White House.ā€™ Now I look back on it, I’m like, ā€˜Why didn’t you yell out? Why did you betray your community like that?ā€™ And it’s a hard thing to think about. But I’m glad that the blinders have been ripped off, and I now, of course, support full marriage equality, and I’m going to marry a dude.ā€

Vic Basile revisits lifetime of advocacy 

Another important book debuting this fall is ā€œBending Toward Justice,ā€ by Vic Basile, the Human Rights Campaignā€™s first executive director and co-founder of the Victory Fund. 

ā€œBending Toward Justiceā€ shares the history of HRC and the journey through AIDS, the attempts to get government recognition and funding for research, education, and treatment, and how HRC confronted ignorance and discrimination to shift the hearts and minds of Americans about equal treatment, according to a statement from the publisher.

ā€œDrawing on his experience as the first executive director of the Human Rights Campaign Fund, Vic Basile has written a valuable addition to the story of one of the most consequential movements in post-World War II America,ā€ said former gay Rep. Barney Frank (D-Mass.). The book was released this week and is available at HRC.org and Amazon. An excerpt follows:

Of Historic Significance

It was a historic moment for the fifteen hundred elegantly dressed people in Washington, D.C.ā€™s Grand Hyatt ballroom, just blocks from the White House.

ā€œLadies and gentlemen,ā€ announced Elizabeth Birch for the Human Rights Campaign, ā€œit is now my deep honor to present to you the president of the United States.ā€ 

The crowd rose to its feet in thunderous applause. Never before had a sitting president addressed an LGBTQ audience until that moment on November 8, 1997, when President Bill Clinton was the keynote speaker at the first Human Rights Campaign National Dinner.

Ellen DeGeneres and Anne Heche were in the audience with Betty DeGeneres, Dorothy Height, Wade Henderson, Ambassador James Hormel, and elected officials, labor and corporate executives, and countless LGBTQ leaders from across the country. C-SPAN cameras ran live coverage, enabling many thousands around the country to share the historic occasion.

Although impossible to document, it seemed as though there were more reporters and cameras in the room than had ever covered an LGBTQ event before. 

The historic significance of the presidentā€™s appearance that night was clear to everyone. No one could deny how far the movement had come since Stonewall. But everyone knew how much further we still had to go and how truly dangerous it could be for us just to live our lives. If those listening to the president that night had been lucky enough to avoid being gay-bashed, a quick scan of the local gay papers too often told of others who hadnā€™t been so fortunate. Just eleven months later, there would be no escaping the horrific description of Matthew Shepard tied to a fence and left to die in a Wyoming field.

Every person in that ballroom lived with this reality, but the older attendees knew firsthand how truly terrifying it could be to be gay during the McCarthy eraā€™s ā€œlavender scare.ā€ They remembered the 1950 congressional hearings on the ā€œEmployment of Homosexuals and Other Sex Pervertsā€ that categorized them as national security threats and described them as perverts and child molesters. They remembered when President Dwight Eisenhower issued an executive order that banned ā€œhomosexualsā€ from the military and civilian federal employment. They recalled the horrifying witch hunts that publicly exposed and humiliated many thousands of federal employees. Not only did many lose their careers, but many lost their families as well. Too many died by suicide.

Those older attendees likely saw the horrifying 1967 CBS documentary anchored by revered journalist Mike Wallace called ā€œCBS Reports: The Homosexuals.ā€ 

ā€œMost Americans are repelled by the mere notion of homosexuality,ā€ Wallace reported. ā€œThe CBS news survey shows that two out of three Americans look upon homosexuals with disgust, discomfort, or fear. One out of ten says hatred. A vast majority believe that homosexuality is an illness; only ten percent say it is a crime. And yet, and here’s the paradox. The majority of Americans favor legal punishment, even for homosexual acts performed in private between consenting adultsā€¦.

ā€œThe homosexual bitterly aware of his rejection responds by going underground. The average homosexual, if there be such is promiscuousā€”his sex life, his love life consists of a series of chance encounters at the clubs and bars he inhabits.ā€

The animus and discrimination against gay people were not confined to the federal government. Many state and local governments did the same. Florida was especially aggressive, using its notoriously cruel Johns Committee to expose and drive gay teachers, professors, and students from their jobs and academic pursuits at the stateā€™s public universities. 

During that time and well beyond it, police routinely raided gay bars, arresting patrons and releasing their names to the media. During one of these raids at the Stonewall Inn in New Yorkā€™s Greenwich Village in June 1969, the patrons, some who were transgender, fought back in an uprising that would last for three days and mark the beginning of the modern-day LGBTQ rights movement. 

That history, filled with richness and brutality, inspired the establishment of what is now the largest and most influential organization supporting LGBTQ rights in the country. I was the first executive director of that organization, taking it in six years from ambitious and almost viable to becoming the twenty-fourth largest of some five thousand political action committees in the United States. I led the organizationā€™s massive lobbying effort to pass legislation mandating federal policy for fighting AIDS, we gave to more than a hundred friendly campaigns and committees, and we initiated several high-pressure actions in response to anti-gay legislation. For better or worse, politics in this country responds to money, and politicians learned they needed to respond to our community and our legislative agenda.

HRCā€™s growth and influence has multiplied with each succeeding leader. Today the Human Rights Campaign has some three and a half million members and supporters, some one hundred seventy-five people on staff, a building worth more than $50 million, and a budget of almost $70 million. Seven leaders have propelled the organization to its present stature. 

HRC lobbies the federal, state, and municipal governments on LGBTQ legislative and regulatory matters, advocates before the courts, participates in judicial and executive branch nominations process, leads and actively works on national civil rights coalitions, educates the public, participates in elections, and works at the grassroots level on civil rights and political matters of national, state, and municipal importance.

But virtually no one remembers the handful of courageous individuals who started a small organization in 1980 to help bend that moral arc toward justice for their community. A few are still here. Manyā€”too manyā€”died of AIDS. All of them should be remembered, and no one more than Steve Endean, the young man who started what is now called the Human Rights Campaign with little money and a whole lot of grit.

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Books

Film fans will love ā€˜Hollywood Prideā€™

A celebration of queer representation in Hollywood

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(Book cover image courtesy of Running Press)

ā€˜Hollywood Pride: A Celebration of LGBTQ+ Representation and Perseverance in Film
By Alonso Duralde
c.2024, Running Press
$40/322 pages

You plan to buy lots of Jujubes.

They’ll stick to your teeth, but whatever, you’ll be too busy watching to care. You like the director, you know most of the actors as first-rate, and word is that the newcomer couldn’t be more right for the role. Yep, you’ve done your homework. You read Rotten Tomatoes, you’ve looked up IMDB, and you bought your ticket online. Now all you need is “Hollywood Pride” by Alonso Duralde, and your movie night is complete.

William Kennedy Laurie Dickson likely had no idea that what he’d done was monumental.

Sometime in the very late 1800s, he set up a film camera and a wax cylinder to record a short dance between two men, hands around one anotherā€™s waists, as Dickson played the violin. It “was one of the very first movies ever shot,” and probably the first film to record men dancing rather intimately alone together.

Back then, and until well into the 20th century, there were laws against most homosexual behavior and cross-dressing, and very rigid standards of activity between men and women. This led to many “intense relationships between people of the same gender.” Still, in World War I-era theaters and though LGBTQ representation “was somewhat slower to get rolling” then, audiences saw films that might include drag (often for comedy’s sake), camp, covert affection, and “bad girls of the era.”

Thankfully, things changed because of people like Marlene Dietrich, Ramon Novarro, Claudette Colbert, George Cukor, Alfred Hitchcock, and others through the years, people who ignored social mores and the Hays Code to give audiences what they wanted. Moviegoers could find LGBTQ actors and themes in most genres by the 1940s; despite politics and a “pink scare” in the 1950s, gay actors and drag (still for comedy’s sake) still appeared on-screen; and by the 1960s, the Hays Code had been dismantled. And the Me Decade of the 1970s, says Duralde, “ended with the promise that something new and exciting was about to happen.”

So have you run out of movies on your TBW list? If so, get ready.

You never want to start a movie at the end, but it’s OK if you do that with “Hollywood Pride.” Flip to the end of the book, and look up your favorite stars or directors. Page to the end of each chapter, and you’ll find “artists of note.” Just before that: “films of note.” Page anywhere, in fact, and you’ll like what you see.

In his introduction, author Alonso Duralde apologizes if he didn’t include your favorites but “Hollywood has been a magnet for LGBTQ+ people” for more than a century, making it hard to capture it completely. That said, movie-loving readers will still be content with what’s inside this well-illustrated, well-curated, highly readable historical overview of LGBTQ films and of the people who made them.

Come to this book with a movie-lover’s sensibility and stay for the wealth of photos and side-bars. If you’re up for binge-reading, binge-watching, or Date Night, dig into “Hollywood Pride.” Popcorn not necessary, but welcome.

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Books

ā€˜On Bette Midlerā€™ is a divine new read

Part charming, part nostalgic, and very affectionate

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(Book cover image courtesy of Oxford University Press)

ā€˜On Bette Midler: An Opinionated Guideā€™
By Kevin Winkler
c.2024, Oxford University Press 
$29.99 232 pages 

Superb.

That word’s appropriate in this situation. Fantastic, that’s another. Transcendent or celestial, if you’re of that mind, or perhaps anointed. There are many adjectives you can use for a performer who transports you, one who sings to your soul. Sensational, breathtaking, outstanding, or ā€“ as in the new book “On Bette Midler” by Kevin Winkler ā€“ another, better word may be more suitable.

Born in Hawaii a few months after the end of World War II, Bette Midler was named after film star Bette Davis. It was a perhaps auspicious start: despite a minor disparity (Midler’s mother thought the movie star’s first name was pronounced “Bet”), young Midler seemed at a young age to want to follow in her almost-namesake’s footsteps. By age 11, she’d won accolades and prizes for her performances and she “yearned to be a serious actor.” As soon as she could, she headed for New York to seize her career.

Alas, her “unconventional” looks didn’t help win the roles she wanted but she was undeterred. Unafraid of small venues and smaller gigs, she “just blossomed” in New York City. Eventually, she landed at the Improv on 44th Street; the owner there helped her negotiate some minor work. Another man became her manager and secured a job for her at the Continental, a New York bath house strictly for gay men. She was hired for eight summer nights, Friday and Saturdays only, for $50 a night.

Almost immediately, her authenticity, her raunchy language, and her ability to relate to her audience made her beloved in the gay community. Midler’s tenure at the Continental expanded and, though legend points to a longer time, she worked at the bath house for just over two years before moving on and up, to television, recording studios, movies, and into fans’ hearts. Still, asks Winkler, “Did it really matter what stage she was on? She touched audiences wherever she performed.”

In his earliest words ā€“ and, in fact, in his subtitle ā€“ author Kevin Winkler reminds readers that “On Bette Midler” is a book that’s “highly opinionated, filled with personal contemplations…” He is, in other words, a super-fan, but that status doesn’t mar this book: Winkler restrains his love of his subject, and he doesn’t gush. Whew.

That will be a relief to readers who wish to relish in their own fervor, although you’ll be glad for Winkler’s comprehensive timeline and his wide look at Midler’s career. Those things come after a long and fascinating biography that starts in 1970, takes us back to 1945, and then pulls us forward through movies, television appearances, stage performances, and songs you might remember ā€“ with appearances from Barbara Streisand, Barry Manilow, and Cher. It’s a fun trip, part confidential, part charming, part nostalgic, and very affectionate.

Despite that this is a “personal” book, it’s great for readers who weren’t around during Midler’s earliest career. If you were and you’re a fan, reading it is like communing with someone who appreciates Midler like you do. Find “On Bette Midler.” You’ll find it divine.

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Books

Architecture junkies will love new book on funeral homes

ā€˜Preservedā€™ explores how death industry evolved after WWII

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(Book cover image courtesy of Johns Hopkins University Press)

ā€˜Preserved: A Cultural History of the Funeral Home in Americaā€™
By Dean G. Lampros
c.2024, Johns Hopkins University Press 
$34.95/374 pages

Three bedrooms upstairs. That’s a minimum.

You need a big kitchen, a large back room would be a bonus, you want lots of bathrooms, and if you can get a corner lot, that’d be great. The thing you need most is a gigantic all-purpose room or maybe a ballroom because you’re planning on a lot of people. As you’ll see in the new book “Preserved” by Dean G. Lampros, not all living rooms are for the living.

Not too long ago, shortly after he took a class on historic preservation, Dean Lampros’ husband dragged him on a weekend away to explore a small town in Massachusetts. There, Lampros studied the town’s architecture and it “saddened” him to see Victorian mansions surrounded by commercial buildings. And then he had an epiphany: there was once a time when those old mansions housed funeral homes. Early twentieth-century owners of residential funeral homes were, in a way, he says, preservationists.

Prior to roughly World War II, most funerals were held at home or, if there was a need, at a funeral home, the majority of which were located in a downtown area. That changed in 1923 when a Massachusetts funeral home owner bought a large mansion in a residential area and made a “series of interior renovations” to the building. Within a few years, his idea of putting a funeral home inside a former home had spread across the country and thousands of “stately old mansions in aging residential neighborhoods” soon held death-industry businesses.

This, says, Lampros, often didn’t go over well with the neighbors, and that resulted in thousands of people upset and lawsuits filed. Some towns then passed ordinances to prohibit such a thing from happening to their citizens.

Still, funeral home owners persevered. Moving out of town helped “elevate” the trade, and it allowed Black funeral home operators to get a toehold in formerly white neighborhoods. And by having a nice ā€“ and nice-sized ā€“ facility, the operators were finally able to wrest the end-of-life process away from individuals and home-funerals.

Here’s a promise: “Preserved” is not gruesome or gore-for-the-sake-of-gore. It’s not going to keep you up all night or give you nightmares. Nope, while it might be a little stiff, it’s more of a look at architecture and history than anything else.

From California to New England, author Dean G. Lampros takes readers on a cruise through time and culture to show how “enterprising” business owners revolutionized a category and reached new customers for a once-in-a-deathtime event. Readers who’ve never considered this hidden-in-plain-sight, surprising subject ā€“ or, for that matter, the preservation or re-reclamation of those beautiful old homes ā€“ are in for a treat here. Despite that the book can lean toward the academic, a good explanatory timeline and information gleaned from historical archives and museums offer a liveliness that you’ll enjoy.

This book will delight fans of little-know history, and architecture junkies will drool over its many photographs. “Preserved” is the book you want because there are other ways to make a house a “home.”

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