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Gloria Gaynor celebrates ‘I Will Survive’ at Library of Congress festival
1978 classic is centerpiece for ‘Bibliodiscotheque’ event honoring disco era

Gloria Gaynor says she used to see ‘I Will Survive’ as a mixed blessing but has come to embrace it as central to her mission to empower and uplift others. (Photo courtesy LOC)
‘Bibliodiscotheque’
Library of Congress
Continues through Saturday, May 6
SCHEDULE:
Friday, May 5:
Music & Veterans Panel Discussion
Noon in Whittall Pavilion
Saturday, May 6:
• ‘Bibliodiscotheque’ symposium with Gloria Gaynor, “Good Morning America” host Robin Roberts et. al. (1 p.m. in Coolidge Auditorium)
• “The Craft of Making Disco Balls” (1 p.m.)
• “Two Perspectives on Beyonce’s African Dance References” (1:30 p.m.)
• “Disco: the Bill Bernstein Photographs” (2 p.m.)
• “Hot Stuff: Disco and the Remaking of American Culture”
• panel discussion, 3 p.m.
• Robin Roberts interviews Gloria Gaynor (4 p.m.)
• Gloria Gaynor, et. al., book signing (5 p.m.)
• Gloria Gaynor in concert (7 p.m. in the Library of Congress Great Hall, sold out)
All events are free and open to the public but tickets must be secured in advance.

Gloria Gaynor (Photo courtesy LOC)
Gloria Gaynor cracked the U.S. Hot 100 several times throughout the 1970s but, of course, it’s her legendary 1978 No. 1 hit “I Will Survive” for which she’s most identified and remembered.
So universally beloved is the song that the Library of Congress has included it in its National Recording Registry, a list of sound recordings that have been deemed “culturally, historically or aesthetically important and/or inform or reflect life in the United States.” Begun in 2000, it includes everything from Scott Joplin piano rags, Bessie Smith blues, Roosevelt’s Fireside Chats, Abbott and Costello comedy routines and much more.
The Library wraps up its disco-tribute series ‘Bibliodiscotheque’ this weekend with an afternoon of events featuring Gaynor culminating with a free concert in the Great Hall. Gaynor spoke with the Blade by phone from her New Jersey home in March.
WASHINGTON BLADE: How do you feel about “I Will Survive” being inducted into the National Recording Registry and how did your involvement in this weekend’s festivities come about?
GLORIA GAYNOR: The song was inducted into the Library of Congress music registry last year and I honestly don’t know how it came about except that I got a message from my manager that they’d called and wanted to do this event. They first called her and said they were inducting the song and then they called a month later and said they wanted me to do this event, so who actually came up with the idea, it probably came out of the meeting we had with them, but I’ve forgotten now. But I was extremely happy about it. Flattered beyond belief.
BLADE: Had you ever been to the Library of Congress before?
GAYNOR: Not before that meeting. I went down and met with them and looked at the Thomas Jefferson building, the archives and oh my God, it’s an awesome building and an awesome room. It’s going to be acoustically a challenge for my sound people to do the concert there, but what a beautiful place, a beautiful room.
BLADE: When were you there?
GAYNOR: That was in November, I believe.
BLADE: You’ll also be signing copies of your 2013 book “We Will Survive: true Stories of Encouragement, Inspiration and the Power of Song.” What kind of reaction have you received from the book?
GAYNOR: A lot of people write and say how the book encouraged and inspired them, which was my whole purpose in writing the book because I’m thinking if you’re going through something, how encouraging, inspiring and uplifting would it be to read about someone who’s gone through what you’re going through or perhaps something even more difficult and yet they came out of the other side victorious? So when people call me and tell me the book or the song has accomplished my purpose, then of course that’s very encouraging, inspiring and uplifting to me.
BLADE: Why do you think the song still resonates so strongly all these years later?
GAYNOR: It taps into the tenacity of the human spirit. It encourages you and inspires you to reach down inside and pull up whatever support you have inside of you to get you through the difficult times in your life. … We all have situations, circumstances in our lives from time to time that we think are insurmountable and hope we’ll survive.
BLADE: Is it true it was originally slated to be the B-side? That seems inconceivable.
GAYNOR: Oh yes, absolutely. The record company had sent me to these producers out in California to record a song that the president of the company had chosen because he’d had a hit with it in England and wanted to repeat that success here in the United States and he specifically wanted me to help him do that so he sent me out to record that song which was called “Substitute.” And when I asked the producers what was going to be the B-side, they asked me in turn what kind of songs did I like, what kind of songs did I like to sing and record. I told them I like songs that are meaningful and that touch people’s hearts and have good melodies and they said, “Oh, we think you’re the one we’ve been waiting for to record this song that we wrote a couple years ago.”
BLADE: Did you realize right away it had strong hit potential?
GAYNOR: Well, the fact that my mother had passed away just a couple years prior and I never thought I’d survive that and the fact that I was standing there in a back brace from my hip up to my art pit because I’d fallen on stage and woke up the next morning paralyzed from the waist down and was in the hospital for four years wondering what was going to happen to my life, I immediately related to the lyrics and immediately believed that since I was relating a couple of situations to the song that had nothing to do with the unrequited love that the song speaks about, I believed other people would do the same thing. I believed it was a timeless lyric that everybody was going to be able to relate to and time has proven me right.
BLADE: There was such a backlash against disco for years. When did you start seeing it appreciated again? Was that in the ‘90s?
GAYNOR: I always believed when people pulled away from it, that was something that was engineered and was more of an economic decision on the part of people whose bottom line was being negatively affected by the fact that people were buying so much disco music and they probably thought this was taking away from people buying their music so I think they came up with this idea for this big rally in Comiskey Park (in Chicago in 1979) but of course my question has always been if all those people who burned all those disco records hated disco music so much, why did they have those records to start with?
BLADE: It seems like it takes a long period after any pop musical genre is super popular — doo-wop, new wave, whatever — to be revived in a nostalgic way. Do you think it was any different with disco or pretty much the same phenomenon?
GAYNOR: Well I think it was a similar thing, but I don’t think it was that incident that caused it. I think that disco music very unfairly became associated with negative things like drugs and all different kinds of overindulgences and I think that contrary to what people believe, California, Miami and New York don’t run the world, middle America runs the world and middle America said I don’t want my children associated with that, so that was the end of it. It wasn’t really the end of it, but it went more into the underground and went more into the dance music that we have today.
BLADE: What’s your favorite cover of “I Will Survive”?
GAYNOR: Chantay Savage.
BLADE: Why?
GAYNOR: Because she’s the only one who really made it her own. She really changed it and made it her own and did a good job of it.
BLADE: How did it come about that you sang it with Diana Ross at her concert in New Jersey in 2013?
GAYNOR: A friend of mine asked me to go to the concert with her. I didn’t know that she had it in the back of her mind that was she using me to try to meet Diana Ross, but that’s what she did. She had called the management of the theater, I don’t know which now, but she got us really great seats using my name and then they came and got us — I don’t know if she asked for me to meet her or how it went, but that’s how we got backstage. They came and got us from our seats just before the show was over and then Diana Ross invited me onstage, which I never expected. I just thought we were standing there, she was going to come back and say hi, my friend’s gonna get her autograph and we’ll be on our way. But she did invite me on stage and I was very flattered and I thought it was really gracious of her to do that and we had a good time. The audience was ecstatic.
BLADE: Her ‘90s cover was just sort of a modest hit but nothing huge yet she’s been closing all her concerts with it for the last several years. Why do you think she keeps doing that when she had so many big hits of her own that would work in that slot in her show? Any theory on that?
GAYNOR: Well I don’t really need a theory on it because I have the truth of it. My brother was her chauffeur and bodyguard for 15 years and he told me that she said she always wished she’d recorded that song. She just liked it and she’s adopted it.
BLADE: Do you ever feel like maybe she’s hoping casual fans will forget it wasn’t she who had the big hit with it in the ‘70s or that she just likes it?
GAYNOR: I think she just does it because she likes it. She thinks it’s a great song.
BLADE: Was it ever challenging for you to reconcile your Christian faith with being open on gay issues or to gay fans?
GAYNOR? No.
BLADE: Did gays and straights mix more in the disco clubs back in the ‘70s or do you recall?
GAYNOR: Well, we all know that there are gay clubs. At my concerts it was always mixed. It was never just all gay or all straight. It was always mixed.
BLADE: Did gays embrace “I Will Survive” right away or that something that grew over the years?
GAYNOR: I honestly don’t know. When they came to the concerts, as I said, it was always mixed. I don’t really separate my fans into categories and see who’s liking what. My fans are just my fans and they like me and whatever I sing, whatever it is. Some, of course, there are certain songs that certain individuals like more than others because they relate to them more than others, but I don’t think any particular group related more to “I Will Survive” more than any other group because it’s a song about human problems, human trauma.
BLADE: But “I Will Survive” is sort of the ultimate shorthand for gay anthem. It’s been voted the top gay anthem of all time by various publications. Did that come about more after the AIDS years perhaps?
GAYNOR: I really don’t know.
BLADE: You’re a native of Newark, New Jersey, but you were obviously already famous and traveling often when Whitney Houston was coming up. Did you know she and Cissy in Newark when Whitney was growing up?
GAYNOR: I knew (Cissy) as an artist I admired and went to see, but I didn’t know her personally. I met Whitney, you know, after she became famous and we had a mutual admiration for one another. She told me on a number of occasions how inspiring I was to her and how she would pull out my song whenever she was feeling down. She looked up to me and admired me and thanked me for being a positive influence in her life.
BLADE: What’s your favorite hymn or gospel song?
GAYNOR: One that was originally called “I Will Survive” but I recorded it and changed the title so people wouldn’t think it was the same song. Now it’s called “He Gave Me Life.”
BLADE: Have you kept all your career mementos? Do you have clippings and gowns and all that?
GAYNOR: Some, yeah. I’ve kept some clippings and gowns but most of my gowns I’ve given away to friends who are in the music business. That’s primarily what I’ve done. If I’m not using something, I’d rather see someone use it.
BLADE: About how much of the year do you travel?
GAYNOR: Now I’m not traveling as much. I’ve slowed down on purpose. It used to be that I was rarely home for more than two weeks at a time but I was rarely gone for more than two weeks at a time, too. Now it’s more like I’m going out maybe once a month, twice a month. Maybe two or three shows a month.
BLADE: You had other hits but “I Will Survive” has become so much more than just a hit record. Some singers feel it’s a blessing and a curse to be so heavily identified with one song. How do you see it?
GAYNOR: I used to see it as a double-edged sword because I recorded so many other songs that in my opinion are great songs, but I’ve come to understand that this song is the core of my God-given purpose and it’s fine, I’m very pleased for it and I’m very happy for it. I just really believe that God said, you know, I want you to have this, I want you to do this with it, I want you to use it to uplift, encourage and empower people with this song and I am very happy and honored for this purpose. I’m very honored for the opportunity and a kind of responsibility to do that for people and it’s wonderful when people come to me and tell me that this song has encouraged them. And the wonderful thing about it is they don’t just say this song did this for me, they say you did this for me. So it adds meaning and purpose to my life and it’s still very, very encouraging and uplifting for me.

Gloria Gaynor (Photo courtesy LOC)
a&e features
D.C. springs back to life with new, returning events
Cherry blossoms, Rehoboth season kickoff, and more on tap
Longer and warmer days are back meaning: It’s time to get out of the house and enjoy Washington D.C.’s many events. Below are a few to check out this spring.
The National Museum of Women in the Arts will host “Making their Mark: Works from the Shah Garg Collection” until Sunday, July 26. This exhibition illustrates women artists’ vital role in abstraction, considers historical contributions, formal and material breakthroughs and intergenerational relationships among women artists over the last eight decades. For more details, visit. NMWA’s website.
Art in the Attic will host a pop-up on Saturday, March 14 at 6 p.m. at 1012 Madison St., Alexandria, Va. There will be a variety of vendors selling products across different modes of art. For more details, visit Eventbrite.
Play Play will host “Indoor Recess – The art of play” on Sunday, March 15 at 2 p.m. This event will embody classic recess energy, including opportunities to build and experience community and connections through games, movement, art stations, and creative freedom. Tickets are $12.51 and can be purchased on Eventbrite.
Spark Social will host “Gay Bar Crawl on U Street” on Friday, March 20 at 7:30 p.m. This will be a fun night out in gay D.C. with other gay people, whether you’re visiting D.C., new to the area, or just looking to expand your social circle. Many crawlers have formed lasting friendships and even romantic relationships after just one night out. Tickets are $35.88 and are available on Eventbrite.
Creative Suitland Arts Center will host “EFFERVESCENT: House of Swann” on Saturday, May 30 at 7 p.m. This will be a gay, good time where we will celebrate love, joy, wellness, and visibility for the LGBTQIA+ community. Tickets start at $17.85 and can be purchased on Eventbrite.
SWAG Works DC will host “Unapologetically Her” on Saturday, March 14 at 2 p.m. at 701 E St., S.E. This event is a powerful celebration of womanhood, resilience, creativity, and self-expression in honor of Women’s History Month. This all-women exhibition highlights the diverse voices, stories, and artistic perspectives of women who create boldly, live authentically, and stand confidently in their truth. This event is free and more details are available on Eventbrite.
9:30 Club will host “Gimme Gimme Disco: A Dance Party Inspired by ABBA” on Saturday, March 14 at 6 p.m. There will also be a “Donna Summer Power Hour – The Queen of Disco” segment during this event. It’ll be one hour of music with no skips. Tickets are available on 9:30 Club’s website.
Harder Better Faster Stronger will host “Heated Rivalry Rave” on Friday, March 20 at 9 p.m. at Howard Theatre. This event is open to all ages. Tickets are available on the theater’s website.
CAMP Rehoboth hosts its 25th annual Women’s+ FEST, April 9-12 in Rehoboth Beach, Del. Entertainers include headliner Mina Hartong, a comedian, storyteller, and founder of Lez Out Loud; and singer Yoli Mayor. There are dances, dinners, pickleball, and much more. Details and tickets at camprehoboth.org.
Also in Rehoboth Beach, the Washington Blade’s 19th annual Summer Kickoff Party is set for Friday, May 15 featuring Ashley Biden, who will accept an award on behalf of her brother Beau. State Rep. Claire Snyder-Hall will also speak. More speakers and the venue to be announced soon.
The annual D.C. Cherry Blossom Festival kicks off March 21 at DAR Constitution Hall and culminates with Petalpalooza on April 4, the day-long, outdoor street party with music and art, stretching across Navy Yard, and ending with fireworks over the Anacostia River.
a&e features
‘Queer Eye’ star Dorriene Diggs on life before and after appearing on hit show
Emotional January episode highlighted 40-year love affair with partner
Dorriene Diggs, 70, whose 40-year relationship with her domestic partner, Diane until Diane’s passing in 2020, the couple’s tense relationship with their respective parents, and Dorriene’s current living arrangement with her straight sister Jo, were the focus of a final season episode of the popular TV series “Queer Eye.”
In a recent interview with the Washington Blade, Diggs told of how her appearance on the show has impacted her life. She elaborated on the many aspects of her life experiences that she told to the five “Queer Eye” co-hosts who interviewed her and her sister in their D.C. home.
Although her parents and her partner’s parents, who have since passed away, were not accepting of their relationship, Diggs has said most of her family members at this time reacted positively to her appearance on the show.
“They loved it,” she told the Blade. “Yes, everybody that saw the show called me and said they loved the show, they really enjoyed themselves watching it.”
Through an arrangement with D.C.’s Rainbow History Project, the “Queer Eye” show featuring Diggs and her sister was presented in a special screening on a large video screen at the D.C. History Center in January.
“Dorriene, a 70-year-old Black lesbian living in Washington, D.C., had spent decades building a life with her partner while navigating silence within her own family,” a “Queer Eye” statement announcing the episode on Diggs states.
“The Fab Five did not arrive to introduce Dorriene to herself, but to help ensure her story was finally heard in full,” the statement says.
Blade: Can you tell us how your appearance on the “Queer Eye” program came about? How did they find out about you?
Diggs: You know, I still don’t have all the details. I think it was my niece, Missy. And she knows somebody there from “Queer Eye.”
Blade: So, did you first learn about it when someone from “Queer Eye” contacted you?
Diggs: No, the “Queer Eye” guy knocked on my bedroom door and started talking. I was in my bedroom watching television and the next thing I know my door opened up and there was Karamo [Karamo Brown, one of the “Queer Eye” co-hosts] with his big black cowboy hat on, opening the door grinning. … They contacted Jo first. And when they came here, they realized there was a gay woman in the house, too. Because my name was not mentioned at first. After they came here, they learned about me, because when Missy reached out to them, she reached out to them about Jo. But that doesn’t bother me. This was all about Jo in the beginning, and not me. … They started talking to me and Jo. And he said, Dorriene, ‘you’ve done so much for so many people, it’s time for someone to do something for you.’ That’s what they said. He said, ‘this is the day we’re doing it for you.’
And so, they put me and my sister up in a hotel for a week. They gave us a personal driver to take us anywhere we wanted to go. And then they took us to a bunch of places. We didn’t know why they were doing all of this. We had no idea that they were renovating the house and renovating our bedrooms. We had no idea.
Blade: What was your reaction when you saw the home renovation?
Diggs: It was amazing. And they bought us all new complete wardrobes – clothes, shoes. But most of the stuff they got me I gave away to a women’s shelter. But it was so nice. Actually, to meet the guys. I’ve been watching the show for 10 years. I have watched it from the beginning. And actually, it brought me and my sister closer – really. We’re closer now than we’ve ever been. She’s my baby sister – not the baby, but next to the baby. She’s the younger one.
Blade: What has been the reaction to your appearance on the show? Do more people now recognize you?
Diggs: Yes, yes. I’m getting phone calls and it’s almost like I’m a celebrity. And I don’t want people to make a fuss over me. All the things I did I did from the heart. I really did. And I don’t want people to think I’m more than I am. I’m just a good Christian woman that believes in giving back.
And I do. God gives me help giving. That’s what I do. And I don’t want anything in return from anyone. You know, because I know what it means to not to have. I know what it means to go to bed hungry, with no food. Going to school with holes in your shoes. I know that. I know that feeling. I’ve been there. And I promised myself as a kid I would never live like this again. And when I got bold enough to leave home, I left home at 14, and I moved in with a drag queen. Damen was his name.
Blade: Did your appearance on the show change your life and your relationship with your sister?
Diggs: Yeah, yeah, it actually did. We are actually closer now than we’ve ever been. Because, like I said, I moved away from home early and I never went back. My parents had a problem with my lifestyle. They really did. My mom looked at me with such hatred. When I was old enough to say goodbye, I never looked back. And to come back around now in the last few years after Diane died, that’s when I came back here.
And at one point I stayed with my nephew Todd and his wife – but he got killed in a car accident. I couldn’t stay at his house anymore. So, then I called Jo and told her I need to get out of here. And without hesitating she came and picked me up and brought me to her home. And I’ve been here ever since.
Blade: Can you tell a little about when it came about and how you met your partner?
Diggs: We lived on 18th Avenue in condos. I just bought one. Hers was above mine. I bought the bottom one. When my brother came over, she was getting out of her car. She was driving a Vega. And I turned to my brother and I said – this is the God’s honest truth – I said Keith, that’s the woman I’m going to spend the rest of my life with. Just like that. And he started laughing. He said, girl you’re crazy. I said I know I’m crazy, Keith, but I’m telling you that woman right there is who I’m going to spend the rest of my life with.
Blade: And when was that?
Diggs: It was 1980 actually. And then I started going to the laundry room to do my laundry. So I started talking to her. She said, ‘I’m not speaking to you.’ Isaid ‘why not?’ She said ‘because you’re nothing but a female gigolo.’ And I said I’m not dating anymore. I’m waiting for you. ‘No, you’re too fast for me.’ I said, ‘well, I’m not giving up.’
And I didn’t give up. So, I was playing an album one day and she knocked on the door and asked what I was playing, I think. I said you liked that. She said yeah. I said OK, I’ll bring it upstairs and we can listen to it together. So, when I went up there to her apartment that day and whenever I went up there, I never left.
Blade: So, your partner’s name was Diane?
Diggs: Yes, Ruth Diane Robinson. But she hated the name Ruth. So, the only people who called her Ruth were at work, the people she worked with. Everybody else called her Diane.
Blade: And how many years were you together?
Diggs: Forty. Forty years together
Blade: And where were you living with her most of the time?
Diggs: We lived in Hagerstown the longest, Hagerstown, Md. And so, if Diane hadn’t died I probably still would have been in our house in Hagerstown.
Blade: Can you tell me a little about what you were doing career wise during those years?
Diggs: I do computers. I used to do computers. And before that I cooked. I love to cook like my mom. And then I wanted to do something else. So, I taught myself computers. I taught myself how to build computers and stuff. So, then I got my own computer business called Ida One Computer Consulting. And so, we helped build computers for people.
Blade: Around when was this, in the 1980a or 1990s?
Diggs: Yes, in the 1980s. I think I stopped I would say around ’96, when I stopped. Because we both said we were going to retire at 55. And we did. We both retired at 55. And then she started diabetes. Every day I had to give her an injection because she was afraid of needles. She couldn’t give it to herself. So, I had to give her an injection every day One time, I don’t remember when, she had a mild stroke. And I had to take care of her. I’ve always taken care of her. And I don’t regret it. I never regretted it. It’s taking care of the one you love.
Blade: When was it that she passed away?
Diggs: In 2020. I found her on the kitchen floor.
Blade: How did your family and your extended family react to your relationship with Diane?
Diggs: Well, her family, oh my God, they hated me – her mother the worst. Because I put a stop to them treating her really bad. I told her mother – I said never in my life – my mother raised me well. Never disrespect someone’s mother. I said but this time I’m going to disrespect you because you are going to start treating Diane like you ought to. This is a wonderful woman and you and your son and you it’s always about your son. You never, ever say anything good about your daughter.
I said it isn’t going to happen again. You’re never going to disrespect her again. I said you take a damn good look at her because you’ll never see her again. I meant that. I grabbed Diane. I said it’s time to go. They don’t care about you.
Blade: Can you tell a little about your family?
Diggs: Yeah, I’m a triplet sister. So, it’s Dorriene, Chorine, and Chrissy — we are the triplets. So, my mom had a set of twins and a set of triplets within nine months. One of the twins died at birth. So, the other twin is Margaret.
Blade: So then how did your family react to you and Jo being on “Queer Eye”?
Diggs: Most of my family really had no problem with it.
Blade: Were you out to them?
Diggs: Oh yeah. I was never in the closet. I didn’t give a damn what people felt about me, sweetheart. I really didn’t. I didn’t care. Because I was going to be me. And for people who didn’t like it, I wasn’t living for them, I was living for me. I’ve always been out. I had a brother who was also gay, Marvin. God rest his soul, too. But he stayed in the closet. He was in the closet until he was about 55 years old.
But everything I said on the show was the truth – my account. The things that I went through with family … You can’t tell me how I felt. If they try to make mom and dad out as perfect, they weren’t perfect. They were the worst parents. That’s my account of it.
So yes, everything I said on that interview was the truth. That’s one thing people who know me know – I do not lie.
Blade: What are some of the things you like to do these days?
Diggs: I’m a sports lover. I love sports. So, my baseball season is getting ready to get started. Baseball is my favorite sport. Yes, I love baseball. I like the statistics of it. And watching the guys. I wish they had a women’s professional baseball team, honestly. … I’m a D.C. sports fan. The Wizards, the Nationals, the Mystics, the Caps. … And see, I’m a diehard Redskins fan and I refuse to call them the Commanders. They’re the Redskins. They will always be the Redskins to me. I love my sports teams.
Blade: Can you tell a little about the history of the house where you and Jo now live and where they did the filming of the “Queer Eye” show?
Diggs: Jo had a house on 17th Street, I think it was Northeast because it was over there by H Street, N.E. And I think somebody wanted to buy her house. I don’t know why she moved. So, she found this house. Because she wanted to buy something where she could buy a house straight out. She didn’t want a mortgage on another house.
Blade: What are your thoughts on being on the last season of “Queer Eye?”
Diggs: Yeah, we were the last ones. We took it out with a bang, me and Jo. That was it.
Blade: Can you say how you and Jo appearing on the show impacted your life?
Diggs: I don’t know. I’m the same person. I’ve been getting calls from people saying I saw you on the show. And friends who I haven’t seen in years have been calling. … So yeah, the show, people I haven’t seen and talked to in years have been calling. I think that’s a good thing.
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35 years after ‘Truth or Dare,’ Slam is still dancing
Salim Gauwloos on Madonna, HIV, and why he almost didn’t audition for Blond Ambition Tour
Most gay men of a certain age remember “the kiss.”
It was the moment Madonna’s dancers Salim Gauwloos and Gabriel Trupin locked lips in the hit 1991 documentary film “Truth or Dare,” which is celebrating its 35th anniversary this spring.
The kiss was hot, but what made it groundbreaking is that it appeared in a mainstream Hollywood movie that screened in suburban multiplexes across the country. This wasn’t an obscure art house film. The movie, and tour on which it was based, received months of breathless media attention all over the world for bold expressions of female empowerment and queer visibility. Madonna was threatened with arrest in Toronto for simulating masturbation on stage and Pope John Paul II urged Catholics to boycott the show, triggering a media firestorm.
“Truth or Dare” was billed as a behind-the-scenes documentary of the tour, but it quickly became clear that the real star of the show wasn’t Madonna, but rather her colorful troupe of seven backup dancers, six of whom identified as gay: Kevin Stea, Carlton Wilborn, Luis Xtravaganza Camacho, Jose Gutierez Xtravaganza, Gauwloos, and Trupin; Oliver Crumes III identifies as straight.
We saw them party and march in the New York City Pride parade. They were unabashedly queer at a dangerous time — before protease inhibitors began to stem the AIDS plague and before most celebrities and politicians embraced the gay community in any real way. Being out in 1991 carried major risks to career and reputation.
Enter Gauwloos, one of those brave dancers who vogued his way into the hearts of countless gay men entranced by his handsome looks, his stage presence, and dance skills.
Gauwloos — known then and now as “Slam”— sat down with the Blade to talk Madonna, the lasting impact of “Truth or Dare,” the public disclosure of his HIV status, and plans for a new book on his life.
His story is fascinating — from growing up in Europe to dancing in New York to landing the gig of a lifetime with Madonna. He performed on that tour while secretly HIV positive and went without medical treatment for 10 years because he was living in the United States as an undocumented immigrant. Not even Madonna knew of his HIV status. Two other dancers on the tour were also HIV positive but no one talked about it. Ironically, Madonna was singing “Express Yourself” and advocating for condom use during her concerts yet backstage three of her dancers were secretly positive.
“A lot of people were dying so I wasn’t going to tell Madonna I had HIV,” said Slam, now 57. “And the others didn’t either. It wasn’t the moment to do it. She used to make speeches about Keith Haring and AIDS and I thought it’s going to be me next.”
Gabriel Trupin died of AIDS in 1995. Slam was diagnosed at age 18 in 1987, a frightening time when a positive test result often meant a death sentence. He booked the “Blond Ambition Tour” at age 21 after moving to New York. His friends encouraged him to audition but Slam resisted because he wasn’t a big Madonna fan.
“It was crazy, everyone wanted that job,” he said, “but I wanted to dance with Janet Jackson and Paula Abdul.” He listened to his friends and shortly after the audition, Slam received a call from Madonna herself inviting him to join the tour.
“We all wanted to be stars but not even Madonna knew how big that tour would become. The way it was choreographed and directed, the stars aligned. … It never looks dated even today.”

The world tour kicked off in Japan in April 1990 then moved to the United States and Europe, stirring controversy wherever it went. There was the iconic cone bra; the aforementioned simulated masturbation during “Like a Virgin”; and religious imagery that offended many Catholic groups and the Vatican.
And the controversy didn’t end with the tour. Cameras were rolling throughout the tour for what Slam thought would be a “video memory” for Madonna. But as the tour unfolded, director Alek Keshishian reportedly became more interested in what was happening behind the scenes so plans for mere tour footage were expanded into a full documentary.
“We were young and partying and didn’t really know what was going on,” Slam said. “You live in this celebrity bubble and you sign a paper – I don’t even know what I signed.”
In 1992, Kevin, Oliver, and Gabriel sued Madonna for invasion of privacy and fraud claiming she used some footage without their consent. They claim they were told nothing would be included in the film that they didn’t want to be seen. In one specific incident, Gabriel alleged that he told producers he didn’t want the scene of him kissing Slam to be in the film as he wasn’t fully out.
“Gabriel was forcibly outed,” in the movie, Kevin said in a 2016 interview.
Slam did not join his colleagues in the lawsuit.
“I couldn’t sue because I was illegal but I wasn’t ever going to sue,” Slam said. “I’m not a suing kind of person. But good for them, they fought for it and won. A lot of people don’t have the balls to sue Madonna.” The suit was settled two years later for an undisclosed sum.
“We were all conflicted about the kiss,” he said with a laugh. “The kiss, oh my God, my boyfriend is going to kill me! Belgian stress!”
Beyond worrying about his boyfriend’s reaction, Slam had concerns about the impact of being openly gay on his modeling career.
“In 1990, you couldn’t get high fashion campaigns as an openly gay model,” he said. “I was worried about that. I couldn’t get a campaign because I was gay. My agency told me to say I was straight and it was just a game.”
In 2016, pegged to the 25th anniversary of “Truth or Dare,” the surviving six dancers filmed a documentary about their lives post-Madonna titled “Strike A Pose.” In it, Slam publicly revealed his HIV status for the first time in an emotional scene with his former colleagues.
“I found the strength to tell the world I have HIV,” he recalls. “I was scared but I felt brave. The outcome and messages were beautiful. After I saw ‘Strike A Pose,’ I knew we gave people hope. And not just for gay people.”
He was infected in 1987 but didn’t get treated until 1997. After the tour ended, he said he went into a depression and his agency dropped him.
“I was partying too much after the tour,” he recalls. “I made a decision to live as an illegal alien.” In 1997, Slam collapsed and was rushed to the hospital with pneumonia.
“They started treating me and thank God the new HIV drugs were out, the cocktails, it took me a couple months to get better.”
Madonna didn’t participate in “Strike A Pose” and Slam said he hasn’t seen or spoken to her since the end of the tour. He said he had no idea of the impact “Truth or Dare” would have.
“You look at this movie in 1991 and you don’t think it’s going to be such a big thing and 35 years later it’s still helping people,” he said. “It was helpful for people who felt alone at that time. It was such an important documentary.
“I don’t think younger gay people realize how important Madonna was to gay and queer visibility — she was a big part of it. We showed the world it’s OK to be gay and that was the great message of this movie.”
He noted that, decades later, many of his friends have transgender kids and that queer culture is represented in much of mainstream pop culture.
“It’s amazing how far we’ve come,” he said. “I know we’ll always be marginalized but we have come so far. I’m really proud of our community. The current nightmare will be over and I do believe that things will get better.”
Referencing President Trump’s attacks on the LGBTQ community and crackdown on immigration, Slam described the situation in the U.S. today as “sad.”
“Everything is such a mess,” he said. “Some of these people have lived here 30-40 years and they take you out of your home. I can’t even imagine. It breaks my heart. When I was illegal it was a different story.”
Slam met his husband, Facundo Gabba, who’s from Argentina, in 2000, and he helped him get a legal case together to win citizenship. He filed a case in 2001 and was told there was a 99 percent chance he wouldn’t be permitted to stay in the United States because they weren’t allowing HIV-positive immigrants to remain in the country. But he got his green card anyway in 2005 and became a U.S. citizen in 2012.
Today, Slam and Gabba live in Brooklyn, though they travel a lot because “I can’t take the cold.” The couple married in Argentina in 2010 and in the U.S. in 2016.
Slam is still dancing and working as a choreographer. He’s teaching at a contemporary dance festival in Vienna in July and even offers online lessons via Salimdans.com.
As a longtime HIV survivor, Slam is dedicated to a healthful lifestyle.
“You have to keep moving; when you move you stay healthy,” he says. “Dance heals everything. I do yoga, I eat healthy and clean as possible. I don’t watch much TV … I try to stay healthy and positive. If I absorb all of the negativity I would be sick.”

In addition to his ongoing work in dance and choreography, Slam is in the early stages of writing a book about his extraordinary life and pioneering career.
“I always knew I had a book inside of me. I want to talk about my HIV status. I know I can inspire more people. I want to tell even more secrets in the book; secrets are a poison so I want to tell everything.”
Among those secrets, he notes, is a desire to write about his strict Muslim father and the years he spent as an undocumented immigrant in America.
“Those are the things I want to talk about, the struggles. It’s a love story, hope and resilience. I know it will help people.”
As for his friends from the tour, Slam says he remains in contact with Gabriel’s mother and José Xtravaganza is his best friend. Baltimore’s Center Stage theater is currently developing a new musical about Xtravaganza’s life. And Slam said he occasionally talks to Oliver, though “he still can’t pronounce Sandra Bernhard’s name.”
At the end of our interview, Slam indulged a round a rapid fire questions:
• Favorite song to perform in the “Blond Ambition” tour? “Express Yourself.”
• Aside from Madonna, who was your favorite artist you worked with? Toni Braxton in “Aida” on Broadway.
• Favorite Madonna song? “Live to Tell”
• Favorite Madonna video? “Bedtime Stories”
• What’s more stressful: performing in a concert or performing on the VMAs? “Both, because we always had to be perfect.”
• Did you go to Madonna’s recent “Celebration” tour? “I didn’t see the show but I saw clips online.”
• What do you remember most about performing “Vogue” at the VMAs? “It was nerve-racking for them to flip those fans.”
• When was the last time you vogued? “I teach classes so a couple weeks ago.”
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