Books
‘Gray Love’ looks at dating after 60
25 percent of American adults live alone
‘Gray Love: Stories About Dating and New Relationships After 60’
Edited by Nan Bauer-Maglin and Daniel E. Hood
c.2023, Rutgers University Press
$24.95/303 pages
It was supposed to be a nice night out.
But you drove around and around looking for the restaurant and once you found it, you learned that you needed reservations. Practically before the evening started, you sensed that your food could be as cold as your date. As in “Gray Love,” edited by Nan Bauer-Maglin and Daniel E. Hood, looking for love wasn’t like this when you were younger.

You thought you’d be happy alone.
After the divorce, the funeral, the last break-up, you didn’t think a little you-time was a bad idea. And it wasn’t – but love, someone to go to the movies with or dine with or snuggle with, seems more and more appealing now. Today, though, as the 42 essays in this book confirm and as you’ve learned, that’s easier said than done.
You want a partner, someone your age, but you fear becoming a caretaker. You like doing your own thing, but having someone around to do it with would be nice. You have company but you are “without intimacy.” Or you don’t want a full-time someone but it’s scary to think about “falling off a ladder alone.”
So you go online because, well, people don’t meet like they used to. That’s when you learn that dating sites are generally ripe with people who lie about their ages, who seem clingy or who want things you can’t give, “the Uncertain, the Angry… the Unattractive,” and – let’s be honest – jerks. Unlike real life circa 1973 or 1993, there’s nobody to vouch for singles online.
You wonder, “What would I wear?” You learn about scams the hard way, while tales of love at way-up-there-ages are inspirational. Experimenting with same sex, different sex, different race isn’t off the table, but nobody’s asked – or you did, and it was wonderful and why didn’t you do that before? Love is love. You date the wrong people, you date the right people, you’re exhausted and disappointed. And sometimes, even for awhile, you’re someone’s “‘sweetie.'”
According to a study quoted in “Gray Love,” about 25 percent of American adults live alone. If you’re one of them and open to a relationship, you need this book.
Just know that this is not a how-to manual. Editors Nan Bauer-Maglin and Daniel E. Hood don’t offer advice in their introduction, and most of their storytellers didn’t Ann-Landers their way into this book. Instead, you’ll read tales of dating and mating gone happily right and very, very wrong, told in ways that will make you laugh, sigh, and know that you’re not alone in your late-life search for love. The mixture here is diverse and wide: if one tale makes you want to swear off dating forever, the next one offers Happily Ever After.
Be aware that a few of the tales inside “Gray Love” flirt with the explicit and others might ruffle a feather or two. Still, it could be great to share it with a millennial or older GenZ’er, If you see this book on a bookshelf, take it out.
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Books
Eliot Glazer’s new book an engaging collection of essays
From growing up gay to turning down ‘Queer Eye’
“The Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Gay: Essays”
By Eliot Glazer
c.2026, Gallery Books
$28.99/240 pages
You try and you try.
Once, twice, you go back at that thorny issue, the dream you have, the punchline that’s not hitting quite right. Sometimes, time is all you need to make it better, or a new approach, or a second look. And then there are days when you actually get things right, as in “The Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Gay” by Eliot Glazer, and it’s all good.

Throughout his life, Eliot Glazer has made mistakes. And it’s OK, everybody trips and falls now and then. In his case, though, he’s perfectly willing to document his failures, foibles, and whoopsies in this book.
He writes of his mother, Sandi, “a Queens-born balabosta” who wouldn’t tolerate laziness in herself or Glazer. He found work as soon as he was legally able to do so, and he had many jobs throughout high school. He was a gardener, ice cream scooper, camp counselor, golf caddy, chocolatier, telemarketer, and video store clerk. The one that fit him best, however, was working at Talbots, a department store for older women, where he found his people.
Even with all those jobs, he was a theater kid in his time off, little though it was. Back then, he was just a boy growing up on Long Island but swagger was important, so swagger he did. He still appreciates a good Broadway show, even the silliest ones.
Glazer says that he had just recently come out when gayness exploded on TV with “Will & Grace” and “Queer Eye for the Straight Guy,” with which he was obsessed. It helped him feel not othered, he says. Producers of the reboot asked him to be a second-generation Eye, but Glazer turned them down, though he thinks he’d have been good at it.
The show helped him with love of décor. His unexpected advisory skills came naturally, through age and wisdom and learning that wild partying isn’t really so much fun.
As for finding love, well, that’s a long, boy-meets-boy-meets-boy story…
So you’re looking for something to easily pick up and put down, something that speaks to your inner impatience? You’ll find that in “The Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Gay,” a book that’s practically meant for you to skip around and you don’t have to read everything.
Essays can be like that, which is nice, even refreshing. Author Eliot Glazer is entertaining enough to make things work, engaging enough to keep it moving, and funny enough to make you want more of what he has to say. He’s open with his life and, despite his fame, his writing isn’t lofty; you can expect stories that’ll make you snort and ones with spice, but also some surprisingly tender moments that soften this book in a way that’s just right.
Readers who want a quick, mostly light book to finish will find something appealing in this collection of essays. If you don’t mind a bit of non-linearity and you need a laugh, “The Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Gay.” is worth a try.
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Books
Curl up with a good book this fall
New releases include mysteries, biographies, religion, and more
The fall books season offers lots of options so curl up and get ready to read.
FICTION
For the mystery fan who likes a sprinkle of thriller, look for “The Longest Death” by Kevin Jagernauth (Soho Crime, December). Richard Cobson hates his small town, he’s bored and desperate to get away. Stealing from his employer is the only thing that makes life bearable. That all changes when Marlon Montgomery comes to town and the two fall in love because if one guy can steal so easily, what can two do?
If you like graphic novels, try the “Tripping Over You” trilogy by Suzana Harcum and Owena White. Milo and Liam are finally able to be open about their relationship, no more hiding their love. They’re living together now, but can it last? “Tripping Over You Book 3” (First Second Books) is in stores in early November.
Also try “Diana: The Punk Singer Who Ripped Through Time” by Nate Powell (Abrams ComicArts, October). It’s about a young woman who’s trying desperately to escape her past, until a mysterious murder sidetracks her plans.
So you say you’re a romantic at heart? Then look for “Unspeakable Things: A Novel” by Elizabeth Hand (Little, Brown & Company, October). It’s a story set in the 1920s, when two young women arrive in the English Countryside to a dark and ancient manor. But, of course, nothing in a Gothic novel is easy, right? And you’ll love this tale.
NONFICTION
So this upcoming year is going to be one of exploration, right? Then look for “Free Love: Adventures in Marriage and Polyamory” by Michelle Tea (HarperOne, November). It’s a well-researched, personal, and interesting look at the lives of polyamorous couples and what it’s like to live what used to be called an “alternative” lifestyle.
If “fall” says “biography” to you, then look for “Showbiz! My Life as a Middle-Aged Man” by Murray Hill (Gallery Books, October). For decades, Hill has been making audiences laugh with his signature humor, but getting laughs hides his past all too well. He grew up in an abusive family and learning to hone his talents took some ingenuity. If you’re not a Hill fan yet, you will be, once you read this book.
For the reader who’s searching for a spiritual place, “Reading the Bible Through Queer Eyes: Good News for LGBTQ+ People from Genesis to Revelation” by podcasters Brian G. Murphy and Shannon T.L. Kearns (HarperOne, December) might help. Here, the authors look deeply at Scripture to find the queerness that’s there, proving to readers that the Word is not always what it seems.
Young readers may want to check out “Bitter Pill: Randy Shilts and the Dawn of the HIV/AIDS Epidemic” by Clement Xavier, illustrated by Heloise Cochois, foreword by Michael Lee (Abrams ComicArts, November). It’s a highly researched true story of activist Shilts, but also of Harvey Milk, and the earliest days of the AIDS crisis, when gay men needed a loud voice to advocate for them.
And finally, if you want a fun book for your kids or a child you love, look for “Good Night, Break a Leg: Life with Broadway Dads” by Bret Shuford, illustrated by Elena Hager (Penguin Workshop). What do parents do when they go to work? A little boy learns that his dads have very special jobs by day – and by night! It’s a cute book for kids, but a special tale for lovers of Broadway.
Be aware that publication dates change, titles change, books can be canceled, and your librarian or favorite bookseller can help you find what you need. Season’s readings!
Books
Dolly Parton biography puts her hardships into context
‘Ain’t Nobody’s Fool’ a highly researched tome not to be missed
‘Ain’t Nobody’s Fool: The Life and Times of Dolly Parton’
By Martha Ackmann
c.2026, St. Martin’s Press
$30/304 pages
Not too bright.
That’s what people once thought about you. Your language didn’t conform, you had your own sense of style, and you were ignorant about modern things and places and foods. But you were no dummy. You were different, and you had a secret: as in the new biography, “Ain’t Nobody’s Fool: The Life and Times of Dolly Parton” by Martha Ackmann, you knew exactly where you were going.

When Avie Lee Owens and Lee Parton first married, they had the very basics: “two knives, two forks, two spoons, a skillet, a butcher knife, and an old iron kettle.” He was 17; she was 15. Babies came quick. The fourth one was named Dolly, after two great-aunts.
Almost from the time she could walk, Dolly sang. Before she was old enough to attend school, she wrote poetry, and she’d begun to notice rhythms and beats she could make with her fingers. As a schoolchild, she created her own musical instruments out of scraps, and she was eager to perform whenever anyone asked her – and they asked often, because Dolly Parton was a nice girl, and her sense of humor conveyed a warmth that drew people in.
Growing up in the Tennessee mountains, Parton was independent, shunning marriage and child-raising, instead focusing on a dream of being a star. By the time she was in high school, she’d had a regular gig on local television but she recognized that there were few opportunities for fame in the mountains, so she left for Nashville the day after high school graduation, with the snickers of naysayers ringing in her ears.
She stayed with an aunt and uncle there, and she beat the streets, dined on grocery store samples to get by, and missed her family and friends. And they worried about her, but they knew nothing would derail her plans. They knew Dolly would be fine.
As a friend said, “’She had her head on pretty good.’”
Chances are that if you’ve listened to music any time in the last 60 years, you’ve heard Dolly Parton through her words or her music or both. Now you need to learn more about her, and “Ain’t Nobody’s Fool” is where to do it.
Here’s a biography that grabs you on the first page with the tiniest bit of family tree, but not so much that you get bored with it. Author Martha Ackmann writes about Dolly Parton’s early life, putting hardships and experiences in context, both personally and historically. There are name-drops, but not overly so, as Ackmann takes you through Parton’s career, her heartbreaks, her marriage, and her years with Porter Wagoner, in detail but not dramatically embellished or outrageously told. It’s a biography that’s just right, sourced well and written with a fresh take that, like its subject, tells a good story.
Fans, of course, will want this highly researched book but music lovers of any age or type will eat it up. That means you, so use up that Christmas gift certificate. “Ain’t Nobody’s Fool” just shines.
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