Living

Ain’t no mountain high enough

Gay climber uses passion to raise money for Trevor Project

Published

11 years ago

July 25, 2013

Keith Loria

Casin Crane atop Mt. Everest. (Photo courtesy Crane)

The names Kilimanjaro, Denali, Elbrus, Aconcagua, Carstensz Pyramid, Vinson and Everest might not be mean much to the average person, but for a mountain climber, these represent the Seven Summits, a collection of select peaks spanning the far reaches of the globe.

The Seven Summits are comprised of the highest mountain peaks on each of the seven continents and to date, only about 400 people have climbed them all. The latest is 20-year-old Cason Crane of Lawrenceville, N.J.

Crane journeyed from the rarified air of the Himalaya to the plains of Africa to the polar glaciers of Antarctica, becoming the fifth youngest and first openly gay person to complete the Seven Summits. He finished this amazing achievement in April with the successful ascents of Mt. Everest and Mt. McKinley back to back.

“It feels great. I’m relieved because it’s a pretty dangerous endeavor and a lot of people aren’t able to do them without getting frostbite and I’m very lucky to come back with all my fingers and toes,” Crane says. “I don’t feel like some overwhelming sense of joy, but I’m really proud to have set the goal for myself and to have worked really hard over the last 15 months to achieve it.”

The driving force behind Crane’s passion was his effort to raise money for a non-profit lifeline for LGBT youth called The Trevor Project.

“When I was in junior high, I had a good friend who committed suicide and though she wasn’t a lesbian, many people assumed she was and she was a very strong ally for me,” he says. “She was a great friend and this devastated me. I soon learned of the Trevor Project and realized I wanted to find a way to support them, but with school and other things, I wasn’t sure what I could do.”

Soon after, Crane learned about the death of Tyler Clementi, a gay teenager from his home state of New Jersey who had been bullied, then killed himself.

“His death opened my eyes to the growing problem of youth suicide, specifically in the LGBTQ community,” Crane says. “I decided I would attempt to climb those summits to raise awareness and funds for the Trevor Project, to help more LGBTQ youth get the help they need and to call attention to this important issue.”

Calling his mission the Rainbow Summits Project, to date Crane, via fundraisers and donations to his website casoncrane.com, has raised about $135,000 for his cause, with none of the money being used to pay for his climbing trips.

“I’m more proud that I have raised this money, which is more amazing to me than climbing the Seven Summits,” he says. “I’m not done yet. I’m hoping more people learn of what I’ve done and look into this great organization.”

For its part, the Trevor Project is impressed by his efforts and gave him its first Trevor Youth Innovator Award at an event in New York City in June.

“Cason is truly an inspiration,” Abbe Land, executive director and CEO of the Trevor Project, said in an e-mail. “He not only has accomplished incredible feats while climbing the Seven Summits, but Cason has also worked to inspire LGBTQ youth and raise awareness about the Trevor Project’s life-saving, life-affirming services. As a community, we are fortunate that young leaders like Cason are in our midst.”

Crane grew up loving adventure and caught the mountaineering bug when he climbed Mt. Kilimanjaro with his mother in 2008 at age 15

“I have loved the outdoors since I was very young and always hiked in my spare time. I’ve been an adventurous person for as long as I can remember,” he says. “Kilimanjaro wasn’t a hard mountain. It’s not technical or particularly challenging, but the experience of going up and climbing was novel and new to me. I loved it. It made hiking that much better because now there was this awesome goal to reach the summit.”

Once he decided to shoot for the rest, he faced many challenges along the way. For one, his parents didn’t want him to do it, so that meant figuring out all the logistics of each mountain, contacting the Trevor Project to let them know of his mission and preparing for each climb on his own. Despite their initial hesitation, Crane’s parents did eventually help finance his trips, which he says enabled him to raise “a lot more for the Trevor Project than I would have otherwise.” Those who’ve done the Seven Summits say it can easily cost about $170,000 to secure guides, permits, airfare, equipment and training.

Then of course, there were the climbs. Crane estimates that over the last 15 months, he spent about five months in tents on mountains — his rainbow flag outside of each one. He endured negative 40-degree temperatures, massive blizzards, howling winds and terrain that is foreign to most people.

Although he says for the most part the mountain climbing community is a close-knit group with lots of encouraging words, he did experience some mistreatment because he is gay.

“I encountered a group of climbers on my climb of Denali in Alaska who were not so pleased by the fact that I had my rainbow flag hung outside my tent,” he says. “They said some not-so-nice things and that was very disappointing. When you get used to being totally accepted, to have that come was a shock.”

Crane wouldn’t let that derail his mission and not soon after he became one of the select few to complete what every mountaineer dreams of.

The 20-year-old will be starting Princeton University (studying international relations and Arabic) in the fall but will continue to speak at schools and other gatherings about his climbs in hopes of raising more money and awareness. Possible upcoming trips include visits to the North and South Poles, as well as some climbing out West.

“I’m not doing anything particularly courageous. The courageous people are kids who are standing up to their bullying,” Crane says. “I climbed some big mountains, which is a great physical challenge but I have so much more respect for these kids who face what they do each day. I didn’t have to deal with as much bullying as a mass majority of the LGBT kids do, and I want them to know I am inspired by them.”

Up Next

Presidential sweet

Don't Miss

Queery: Grainne Griffiths

FUND LGBTQ JOURNALISM

Real Estate

The rise of virtual home tours

Adapting to changing consumer preferences in spring real estate

Published

3 hours ago

April 26, 2024

Jeff Hammerberg

Looking for a home? Virtual tours hold special benefits for queer buyers.

In today’s dynamic real estate market, the spring season brings not only blooming flowers but also a surge of activity as buyers and sellers alike prepare to make their moves. However, in recent years, there’s been a notable shift in how consumers prefer to explore potential homes: the rise of virtual tours.

For the LGBTQ community, these virtual experiences offer more than just convenience; they provide accessibility, safety, and inclusivity in the home buying process.

Gone are the days of spending weekends driving from one open house to another – unless that’s your thing of course, only to find that the property doesn’t quite match expectations. With virtual tours, you can explore every corner of a home from the comfort of your own space – find something interesting? Schedule a showing with any LGBTQ Realtor at GayRealEstate.com.

This is particularly significant for LGBTQ individuals, who may face unique challenges or concerns when attending in-person showings. Whether it’s the ability to discreetly view properties without fear of discrimination or the convenience of touring homes located in LGBTQ-friendly neighborhoods across the country, virtual tours offer a sense of empowerment and control in the home buying process.

Moreover, virtual tours cater to the diverse needs of the LGBTQ community. For couples or families with busy schedules or those living in different cities or states, these digital walkthroughs provide a convenient way to view properties together without the need for extensive travel. Additionally, for individuals who may be exploring their gender identity or transitioning, virtual tours offer a low-pressure environment to explore potential living spaces without the added stress of in-person interactions.

At GayRealEstate.com, we understand the importance of adapting to changing consumer preferences and leveraging technology to better serve our community. That’s why our agents offer an extensive selection of virtual tours for LGBTQ individuals and allies alike – visit our website, choose an agent and within minutes you’ll have access to the Multiple Listing Service (MLS) via their website.

From cozy condominiums in bustling urban centers to sprawling estates in picturesque suburbs, virtual tours showcase a wide range of properties tailored to diverse tastes and lifestyles.

In addition to virtual tours, GayRealEstate.com provides comprehensive resources and support to guide LGBTQ buyers and sellers through every step of the real estate journey. Our network of LGBTQ-friendly agents is committed to providing personalized service, advocacy, and representation to ensure that all individuals feel respected, valued, and empowered throughout the process. Plus, we are happy to provide a free relocation kit to any city in the USA or Canada if you are a home buyer.

As we embrace the spring season and all the opportunities it brings in the real estate market, let’s also celebrate the power of virtual tours to revolutionize the way we find and experience our future homes. Whether you’re searching for your first apartment, forever home, or investment property, GayRealEstate.com is here to help you navigate the exciting world of real estate with confidence, pride, and inclusivity.

Jeff Hammerberg is founding CEO of Hammerberg & Associates, Inc. Reach him at [email protected].

Advice

Should I divorce my husband for the hot new guy in our building?

Debating whether to leave or stay after the sex goes cold

Published

11 hours ago

April 26, 2024

Michael Radkowsky

Dear Michael,

I’ve been with my husband for 10 years and the sex is pretty much gone. It stopped being exciting a long time ago and pretty much the only time we ever do it is with the occasional third.

A really hot guy moved into our building about a year ago. We would see each other sometimes in the elevator or at our building’s gym and we started talking and really hit it off. Mark is 15 years younger than I but we seem to have a lot in common. We started hooking up and the sex is amazing.

I haven’t told my husband because it’s breaking our rule about no repeats. I have to say that the secrecy is hot. It’s kind of a thrill to take the elevator upstairs when I say I’m going on an errand. But it’s more than that. I have a connection with Mark that is far more amazing than what I have ever felt with my husband. Not just the sex. We just enjoy being together, talking about anything and everything.

My husband went to visit his family last weekend and I spent the whole time with Mark. Since then I can’t stop thinking that I want to leave my husband and be with Mark.

Part of me thinks this is a crazy mid-life crisis. I mean, this kid’s in a totally different place in life. But we have mind-blowing sex and a fantastic connection. I’d like your thoughts on how to proceed.

Michael replies:

You’ve got a lot to consider.

First: Sex with a long-term partner changes over time. It tends to be less about erotic heat and more about the connection with a person whom you love. In other words, it’s being with the person you’re with that makes the sex meaningful and even great. Having a good sexual relationship with a long-term partner comes far more from a heart connection than from a crotch attachment.

Second: You seem ready to throw your relationship under the bus pretty quickly, without addressing other problems in the relationship besides sex. When you are sneaking around, lying, and rule-breaking , I don’t see how you can look your husband in the eye; and if you can’t look him in the eye, you certainly can’t have even a half-way decent relationship.

Yet another point to consider: Affairs pretty much always seem more exciting than marriage. The partner is new, which almost automatically makes the sex hotter; the secrecy is a thrill; and you don’t have to deal with paying the rent, house chores, and all the petty annoyances of living up-close with someone day-in, day-out.

You are bringing lots of energy to your affair, and everything about it is exciting. You are bringing no energy — at least no positive energy — to your marriage. You get what you put into a relationship.

Divorce is not something that should be entered into lightly. Be aware that if you leave your husband for Mark, you will no doubt find over time that the sex becomes less exciting and that the connection is not always fantastic. No surprise, 75 percent of marriages that begin with affair partners end in divorce. While I don’t think statistics predict what will happen to any particular couple, believing that you will have a significantly better relationship with your affair partner than you did with your husband sets you up for likely disappointment.

Many gay men focus on “hot sex” as the big draw, pursuing a lot of sex with a lot of men, and/or pursuing an ongoing series of relationships that last until the sex cools. If that’s what you want, that’s fine. But it’s a different path from pursuing a close and loving long-term relationship, which involves knowing someone well and having him know you well; collaborating on getting through the hard stuff life throws at us; finding ways to make peace with disappointment; and consistently striving to be someone worth being married to.

How to proceed? While you are the only person who should make that decision, I would suggest that whatever your choice, keep in mind that marriage can be more than what you’ve made of it, so far.

Michael Radkowsky, Psy.D. is a licensed psychologist who works with couples and individuals in D.C. He can be found online at michaelradkowsky.com. All identifying information has been changed for reasons of confidentiality. Have a question? Send it to [email protected].

Autos

Sport haulers: Jeep Grand Cherokee, Mercedes GLE-Class

Updated cabins, adept handling, and more

Published

6 days ago

April 20, 2024

Joe Phillips

Jeep Grand Cherokee

Now that March Madness and the Masters are over, it’s time for, well, everything else. For my husband and me, this means water sports, as in kayaks and rowing sculls, which is why we trekked to the Potomac for the George Washington Invitational regatta last weekend.

Alas, high winds splashed cold water on the event, canceling much of it. But there was still plenty of spirited camaraderie to rival “The Boys in the Boat.”

And I was reminded of my time years ago as a rower with D.C. Strokes, ferrying teammates to races up and down the East Coast. Back then my ride was a dated, rather cramped four-door sedan.

If only we could have paddled around in a sporty SUV like the two reviewed here. Now that would have been some smooth sailing (wink-wink).

JEEP GRAND CHEROKEE

$40,000

MPG: 19 city/26 highway

0 to 60 mph: 7.5 seconds

Maximum cargo room: 37.7 cu. ft.

PROS: Updated cabin, adept handling, strong towing

CONS: So-so gas mileage, no third row, pricey trim levels

IN A NUTSHELL: Rough, tough and buff. It’s doesn’t get much more butch than a Jeep. This year’s Grand Cherokee is no exception, with rugged looks, expert off-road capability and better-than-average towing capacity of 6,200 pounds.

There are a dizzying number of trim levels—more than a dozen—starting with the barebones base-model Laredo at an affordable $40,000. The lineup tops out with the Summit Reserve 4xe PHEV, which is almost twice the price at $76,000 and one of various plug-in hybrid versions available. Those plug-in hybrids can drive up to 25 miles on all-electric power before the four-cylinder gas engine kicks in. Otherwise, you can choose from a standard V6 or V8. Gas mileage on all trim levels is basically the same as the competition.

Where the Grand Cherokee really shines is in the handling. More refined than a Wrangler but less lavish than a Land Rover, this Jeep maneuvers just as well on city streets and highways as it does on bumpier terrain.

I tested the mid-range and mid-priced Overland, which comes standard with four-wheel drive and large 20-inch wheels. It also boasts a slew of niceties, such as quilted upholstery, panoramic sunroof and high-tech digital displays. These include a 10.25-inch infotainment touchscreen and rear-seat entertainment system.

The nine-speaker Alpine stereo, designed specifically for the Grand Cherokee, is pleasing. But I really wanted to hear the boffo 19-speaker McIntosh surround-sound system that Jeep also offers. Sigh, it’s only available on the premium Summit trim level.

MERCEDES GLE-CLASS

$64,000

MPG: 20 city/25 highway

0 to 60 mph: 6.6 seconds

Maximum cargo room: 33.3 cu. ft.

PROS: Lush interior, silky-smooth suspension, speedy

CONS: Some confusing electronics, tight third row, many competitors

IN A NUTSHELL: For a more high-class hauler, there’s the Mercedes GLE-Class. This midsize SUV is similar in size to the Jeep Grand Cherokee. But instead of seating five passengers, the GLE can carry up to seven. Sure, legroom in the optional third row may be tight for taller travelers, but it’s perfect for a cocky cockswain or two.

Six trim levels, ranging from the base-model GLE 350 to two high-performance AMG models. For eco-conscious buyers, the GLE 450e plug-in hybrid arrived earlier this year and can run on battery power alone for almost 60 miles.

My test car was the top-of-the-line AMG 63 S 4Matic, a head-turner in every way. Priced at a whopping $127,000, this GLE looks best in glossy black with the Night Package, which includes tasteful jet-black exterior accents and matte-black wheels. To complete the Darth Vader effect, there’s a deep, menacing exhaust rumble that’s downright threatening.

You expect such a ride to be wicked fast, and it is: 0 to 60 mph in a blistering 3.7 seconds. Yet the carbon ceramic brakes with their devil-red calipers are equally impressive in slowing things down quickly.

Inside, each GLE comes with two large digital displays on the elegantly sculpted dashboard. My favorite feature is the “Hey Mercedes” digital assistant, which responds to voice commands such as opening or closing the sunroof, operating the infotainment system or activating the climate controls.

It’s hard to find sport seats that are more comfortable, especially with the heavenly massage function (though those massage controls could be a bit more user-friendly.) For AMG models, the seats come with red-contrasting stitching and red seatbelts—a nod to the devilish demeanor under the hood.

Considering all the SUVs available in showrooms, few make quite the splash of a GLE.