Living
Queery: Tim Woody
20 questions for the Brother Help Thyself supporter
Tim Woody remembers his early years in Washington fondly. He’d been through the HIV-related death of his partner in 2000 and emerged from the tragedy as a gay social butterfly.
“Monday was JR.’s, Tuesday was drag bingo, Thursday was shirtless night at Green Lantern, Friday was bear happy hour at Ramrod, Saturday was the Eagle,” he says. “I was out all the time.”
Working in various retail management jobs by day and partying with the bear and leather communities many nights, Woody was never at a loss for activities. He was also active with Brother Help Thyself, a local gay HIV/AIDS charity. The socializing paid off. He met his current partner, HRC’s Jim Rinefierd, one night at Titan Ramrod.
“I said, ‘What would it take to get you to take your shirt off,'” Woody recalls. “He said, ‘Not much.’ I went home with him that night and basically haven’t gone home since. That was three-and-a-half years ago.”
The 37-year-old Oceanside, Calif., native, who was discharged from the Navy under “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” in 1993, has had a lot of change in his life. Just a year ago, he switched careers and started selling real estate for Coldwell Banker in Dupont Circle. For a rookie Realtor, it’s going surprisingly well he says. Woody and Rinefierd live together in D.C.’s Brookland neighborhood with their 7-year-old Border Collie, Seamus. Woody enjoys shopping, cooking and community efforts. For information on Brother Help Thyself’s annual fundraiser Night Out at Kings Dominion, slated for Sept. 11, visit brotherhelpthyself.org.
How long have you been out and who was the hardest person to tell?
I’ve been out for almost 20 years. The hardest person to tell would have been my mom. Primarily because of those fears most of us face when deciding to come out. Will I be rejected and ousted or accepted and loved all the more. Fortunately it was the strong emphasis on the latter with all the love my mom could have given me. Being on “The Sally Jesse Raphael Show” helped too.
Who’s your gay hero?
People who took a stand to make things right or fought doing so that others would enjoy life’s offering more. People like the late Neil Alexander and the late Cheryl Spector.
What’s Washington’s best nightspot, past or present?
It all depends on what day of the week you’re going out. Our community has a lot to offer and there is definitely something for everyone.
Describe your dream gay wedding.
If money was not an issue, for me it wouldn’t be about the gifts but more about the moments, and the party of the century. Hosted and featured with the best of food, music and drinks. It would be friends and family coming out to celebrate that moment in my life. To celebrate not only what has become but what will be in the future, a bonding of lives.
What non-gay issue are you most passionate about?
Helping those in what way I can who are less fortunate than I. I’ve been given a great number of blessings and sometimes others aren’t as lucky who deserve to be.
What historical outcome would you change?
In my own personal history, it would happen to be the loss of my father when I was only 5-and-a-half years old to a Tractor Trailer accident in Oregon. I’ve always wondered what my dad would have been like as I grew from a kid to my teens into the man I am today.
What’s been the most memorable pop culture moment of your lifetime?
Going to the “Wildest Dreams” Tina Turner concert with my late partner, Jon. Feeling alive with the energy, which radiated from the stage. Wow, what a woman.
On what do you insist?
Good hygiene, well addressed manners and people who give a shit about what is going on around them.
What was your last Facebook post or Tweet?
Silly nonsense about a good laugh I had with the new Geico commercial about the little piggy who cried, “We we we all the way home.”
If your life were a book, what would the title be?
“The greatest thing I’ve learned was just to love and be loved in return.” (Yes, a “Moulin Rouge” quote).
If science discovered a way to change sexual orientation, what would you do?
I would stay exactly who I am. I believe I have been made for God wants me to be, not what society wants of me.
What do you believe in beyond the physical world?
Be it heaven, nirvana or wherever you may end up, I do believe there is a place to where the spirit from our body takes flight. Being receptive to spirits and their presence (loved ones passed are always around me).
What’s your advice for LGBT movement leaders?
We’ve made great strides for our community since knowing I was gay almost 25 plus years ago. Keep up with the momentum, persevere and endure. Rome wasn’t built in a day.
What would you walk across hot coals for?
Being brought up by a mother who has lived with polio all of her life, there is nothing more that moves me than the thought for her to know what it is like to walk without her brace, crutches or the aid of her wheelchair/scooter.
What gay stereotype annoys you most?
All gay men are just pedophiles in hiding or we’re out to recruit for our cause or hidden agenda. Where’s my toaster?
What’s your favorite gay movie?
A true toss up between “Sordid Lives” and “Girls will be Girls.” I love do me some Varla Jean. Who doesn’t?
What’s the most overrated social custom?
Boys should be raised as boys and girls as girls. Let kids express and find themselves as they will.
What trophy or prize do you most covet?
Holding the title as Mr. D.C. Bear for 2005 through 2007. As well as being awarded Brother Help Thyself’s Anthony J. Bachrach Award for 2010 in recognition for “Outstanding Volunteer Services to the Gay and Lesbian Community” here in D.C.
What do you wish you’d known at 18?
That my life was going to be touched by a lot of different people. Never be afraid to embrace them and always let them know what they mean to you before it’s too late.
Why Washington?
After my partner of four years passed in December 2000, I started getting involved more with the leather and bear community. Doing more fund raising, meeting new people and instead of constantly commuting, I was told by a good friend, a mentor of sorts, that there’s no better time to just jump into a new life. And so I jumped. I just didn’t know it was going to be one as great as this life has turned out to be.
Autos
Wagons ho! High-class, head-turning haulers
Automakers still offer a few good traditional station wagons
As a teenager, one of the first cars I drove — and fell in love with — was our family’s hulking full-size wagon. It stretched over 19 feet in length and weighed a whopping 5,300 pounds. That’s three feet longer and 1,000 heavier than, say, a Ford Explorer today.
But this Leviathan felt safe and practical, especially when tootling around town with my crew or traveling solo cross-country. Of course, this hauler was also an eco-disaster.
Luckily, that’s not the case today. And even though the number of traditional station wagons keeps shrinking, automakers are still offering a few gems.
VOLVO V60 CROSS COUNTRY
$54,000
MPG: 23 city/31 highway
0 to 60 mph: 6.6 seconds
Cargo space: 51 cu. ft. (rear seats folded)
PROS: Elegant design. Composed handling. Top safety features.
CONS: So-so power. Modest rear legroom. Only two trim levels.
The 2026 Volvo V60 Cross Country doesn’t cry for attention — and that’s the point. This is the automotive equivalent of Kristen Stewart, a celebrity who’s confident in her own skin and sees no need to post about it.
Under the hood, there’s a four-cylinder turbo engine paired with a mild-hybrid system, producing 247 horsepower. You won’t outrun other drivers, but there is a sense of calm authority when accelerating. The standard all-wheel drive and 8.1 inches of ground clearance mean this wagon is ready for dirt roads, bad weather or a spontaneous weekend jaunt.
And inside? Scandinavian minimalism at its finest. Clean lines. Gorgeous materials. Google-based infotainment that mostly works — though occasionally the system could be a bit faster, at least for my taste. The ride is smooth, composed and quiet, even if acceleration feels more “measured sip” than “espresso shot.”
But here’s the twist: After more than a decade, this is the final Volvo wagon in the U.S. Its farewell tour ends in 2026. That alone gives it collector-car status.
MERCEDES-AMG E53 WAGON

$95,000
MPG: 21 city/25 highway
0 to 60 mph: 3.4 seconds
Cargo space: 64.6 cu. ft. (rear seats folded)
PROS: Supercar vibe. Hybrid versatility. Stunning interior.
CONS: Some fussy controls. Can feel heavy when cornering.
If the Volvo V60 Cross Country is subtle, the 2026 Mercedes-AMG E53 Wagon is a screamer. It’s like being at a Lil Nas X concert: flashy, high energy, and full of shock and awe.
This performance wagon — a plug-in hybrid, no less — pushes well over 500 horsepower (and in some configurations over 600 horsepower), launching from 0 to 60 mph as fast as a $300,000 Aston Martin supercar.
Yes, deep down, this is still a wagon. But you also can do a Costco run in something that could embarrass sports cars at a stoplight. That duality is delicious.
Inside, Mercedes leans all the way in. The high-tech Superscreen setup stretches across the dash. Ambient lighting glows like a curated art installation. The 4D surround-sound audio literally pulses through the seats. It’s immersive. Borderline excessive. And entirely the point.
Rear-axle steering helps mask the size of this car, but there’s no hiding the weight — it’s a big, powerful machine. Still, this hauler handles far better than physics suggests it should.
PORSCHE TAYCAN CROSS TURISMO

$121,000
Range: 265 miles
0 to 60 mph: 2.8 seconds
Cargo space: 41 cu. ft. (rear seats folded)
PROS: Lightning fast. Space-age design. EV smoothness.
CONS: Very pricey. Options add up quickly. Limited rear visibility.
The Porsche Taycan Cross Turismo completely rewrites the wagon formula. Fully electric. Shockingly fast. Designed like it belongs in the Louvre.
Performance is instant. Depending on trim level, you’re looking at 0-to-60 mph in less than 3 seconds. No exuberant engine noise — just that smooth, purring EV surge.
Handling? Pure Porsche. Low center of gravity thanks to the battery-pack placement. Precision that makes winding roads feel like choreography. And then — hello — there’s also a Gravel Mode for light off-road use.
Inside, the style is restrained but high-tech. Digital displays dominate, including a 10.3-inch passenger side touchscreen. Yet the layout feels intentional rather than overwhelming. Build quality is exceptional. Options, including leather-free materials and an active-leveling system for hard cornering, are endless — and expensive.
Range varies by model. But as with any EV, your lifestyle (and charging access) matters.
Overall, this is a wagon that looks and behaves like one helluva class act.
Advice
My family voted for Trump and I cut off contact
Now my father is ill and I don’t know what to do
Dear Michael,
I stopped talking to my family last year because they all voted for Trump. It’s not like they didn’t know whom they were voting for — they’d already had four years of seeing him in action.
I decided that I couldn’t remain in contact with people whom I felt wanted to take away my rights as a gay man. That is what they essentially did by voting for Trump.
They had come to my wedding in 2012, they had welcomed my husband and me into their homes for the holidays for our entire relationship, so I couldn’t believe how little they actually cared about me and my community. I was profoundly hurt.
They’ve reached out but I have been too angry at their hypocrisy to engage in more than a perfunctory way. I miss them, sure, but as I’ve watched our community be attacked, I just get so angry that I don’t want to talk. I certainly don’t want to hear them justify bigotry and hatred.
Now one of my siblings has reached out to let me know that my father’s health is rapidly declining. I’m wondering if I should rethink my decision and reach out to him, maybe even visit, before he dies.
But then I think of ICE’s attack on our country and the removal of the Pride flag from Stonewall and I don’t want to talk to people who support what is happening to vulnerable, marginalized people and the LGBTQ community.
My father was a good father to me. Even when I first came out to him, he was loving and supportive. I can’t square his behavior personally toward me with his support of this regime. The hypocrisy makes me so angry. How could he purport to love me and then vote against my freedoms?
I would love some suggestions about how to square my two opposing viewpoints.
Michael replies:
Many years ago, a great mentor taught me that the one thing you can count on in a relationship is learning to tolerate disappointment: Both being a disappointment, and being disappointed in the other person. This is true for love relationships and it’s also true for other significant relationships. All of us are different in some major ways and so we are bound at times to disappoint our loved ones in major ways, and to be disappointed by them in major ways.
That is why I’m not a fan of purity tests. To expect that someone must think like you (much less vote like you) in order for you to have a relationship with them is unrealistic, impractical, and sometimes damaging.
Of course, a person may hold some beliefs that give you reason not to want to have any connection to them. But is that the case here?
From your description, your family has always been loving and supportive of you as a gay man. That is no small thing. They seem to care about you enough to have continued to reach out, even though you have stopped talking to them.
Perhaps they had some other reasons for voting as they did, other than to roll back LGBTQ rights and to attack immigrants.
Instead of wondering how they could be so hypocritical, how about talking with them and striving to understand their choices? I don’t know what they will say, and you may hear different answers from your various family members. But at least you will get some clarity, rather than presuming that they made their voting choices from a place of malice. Then you will be in a better position to decide if you want a relationship going forward.
Another point to consider: Very few things are set in stone. Even if your family made their voting choices based on holding positions that you neither like nor respect, they may be open to shifting their views over time. One way to perhaps influence their thinking is by engaging with them, sharing your thoughts, and asking them to consider the possible consequences of their actions. If you choose to re-engage with them, two points to consider:
First, don’t expect that you will change their minds. You can advocate for what you want, but you have to let go of the results.
Second, they are more likely to consider your points if you do not approach them from a judgmental, self-righteous stance.
Many years ago, when I was newly a vegetarian, I was eager to challenge and “educate” friends who weren’t following my dietary ideas. Guess what? It didn’t work. Then I got some great advice: A great way to influence others to consider eating fewer animals was to serve them delicious vegetarian food.
The same point is true here. We can’t beat people over the head to agree with us. But if we approach them with some kindness, rather than with the certainty that we hold the moral high ground, we may help them see a bigger picture.
And sometimes, we too may see a bigger picture.
Michael Radkowsky, Psy.D. is a licensed psychologist who works with couples and individuals in D.C., Maryland, Virginia, and New York. He can be found online at michaelradkowsky.com. All identifying information has been changed for reasons of confidentiality. Have a question? Send it to [email protected].
Are you prepared to meet the changing expectations of tenants? Tenant priorities are continuously shifting. As professional property managers, my team has witnessed firsthand the evolving demands of tenants over the last few years.
Frankly, today’s D.C. residents have high standards. Many have shifted to remote work, and they are placing a growing emphasis on sustainability. And these expectations are poised to evolve even further, with factors like affordability, technology integration, and community-driven amenities taking center stage.
Understanding these changes and adapting your rental to meet the growing demands of tenants and their evolving preferences will not only help you attract high-quality residents but also settle into long-term success in a competitive market. Let’s look at key tenant trends for 2026 in Washington, D.C. by providing practical strategies that help owners and investors navigate this shifting landscape, ensuring your property remains desirable and profitable in an increasingly growing rental market.
According to Buildium’s 2025 Industry Report, tenant retention is rising, and that’s due to a number of factors. It’s expensive to move, so if residents are enjoying a peaceful and pleasant rental experience and they appreciate where they live, it’s unlikely they will spend more money to live somewhere else.
The “2026 State of the Property Management Industry Report” also noted the rise of “Resident Benefit Packages,” which has contributed to retaining good residents. When landlords and property managers offer benefits such as protection against late payment fees, online conveniences, credit monitoring, air filter drop shipments, preventative maintenance services, and even concierge amenities, they increase tenant satisfaction and retention.
By investing in resident benefits, you can increase the likelihood of keeping your tenants satisfied. They’re more likely to renew their lease agreements and contribute to the care and upkeep of their home.
Provide smart home tech
According to data gathered by Nasdaq, Washington, D.C., is one of the top 10 U.S. cities where remote work is most popular, with more than one-third of the population working from home at least part of the time. Even with the federal government calling many people back into the office over the last year, remote work continues to be normalized. Tenants are working and studying from home, and they need their home to support that lifestyle shift.
They’re looking for technology, and that factor provides you the opportunity for you to attract remote workers as residents. While smart home technology was once a fairly niche amenity, it’s now becoming the standard. It’s an expectation of most tenants in Washington, D.C., that at the very least they’ll be able to:
- Connect to fast Wi-Fi at their home
- Enjoy online rental payment platforms that are secure and convenient.
- Make routine maintenance requests through resident portals
It was also recommended considering installing keyless entry systems, offering upgraded security such as video doorbells, investing in smart thermostats, and making it as easy as possible for tenants to integrate their own digital platforms and apps into their home life, whether that’s Alexa or Siri or their own personal AI-driven digital assistant.
Community-Driven Amenities in Washington, D.C., Rentals
Are you renting out units in a multi-family building or an apartment? Washington, D.C., tenants are focused on community and social connection, and so the demand for community-driven amenities is on the rise.
In 2026, renters are looking beyond traditional features like gyms or pools, seeking spaces that allow for interaction, well-being, and a sense of belonging. Co-working spaces, communal kitchens, and rooftop gardens are now more popular in buildings that are working to attract tenants who prioritize shared experiences. A recent report from Ronco Construction reports that these are the emerging trends in multi-family housing amenities:
- Rooftop decks
- Outdoor lounges
- Community gardens
- Fitness studios
- Dog parks and pet spas
- Co-working space
Know your tenant pool
If you rent out single-family homes, you’re dealing with tenants who prefer privacy and space. In those multi-family buildings and condo communities, however, tenants are likely looking for opportunities to connect with their neighbors and make friends. We have seen tenants drawn to properties that offer event programming, such as fitness classes, happy hours, or cultural gatherings, helping create a sense of community in a neighborhood atmosphere.
As an owner, investing in these types of amenities can increase tenant satisfaction, encourage long-term leases, and set your property apart in a competitive market where residents crave more than just a place to live, but also a place to connect.
‘Green Renting’ in D.C.
Tenants want to save money on energy and utilities. Most of them would also rather do whatever they can to be more conscious of their effect on the planet. The city of Washington, D.C., actively encourages this. According to Building Innovation Hub, Washington, D.C., wants to cut greenhouse gas emissions in half by 2032. More efficient building standards and energy incentives are making that possible.
Rental property owners can meet tenant expectations around sustainable living and environmental-friendly features by providing LED lighting, energy-efficient appliances, low-flow plumbing fixtures, and modern programs for managing waste and recycling.
Every tenant in Washington, D.C., is different of course, but there are common expectations that come with residents when they’re looking for a new home. Those highlighted here are even more important to tenants in 2026.
Find out how to make your Washington, D.C., rental property more competitive on the market. Engage a professional property manager for the advice you need.
Scott Bloom is owner and senior property manager of Columbia Property Management.
