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Doggone funny read

Odes to the joys and frustrations of being a pet lover captured in new book

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‘I’m Not the Biggest Bitch in This Relationship’
edited by Wade Rouse
New American Library
$14
259 pages

Gays love their dogs. Perhaps in even greater numbers than our straight counterparts since we’re less likely to have children.

As you’ll see in the new book “I’m Not the Biggest Bitch in This Relationship,” a book of short stories edited by Wade Rouse, we’re not the only ones who love our dogs.

Without a doubt, your pooch is a member of your family. She sleeps with you. You share your food with him. You might even dress your dog in better duds than you have in your own closet. The relationship you have with Puppykins might be stronger than most of the ones you have with humans. Surely, you can’t be the only demented dog-lover in the world… can you?

Not by a long shot.

Let’s say you couldn’t ignore the dog that seemed to need you more than anything in the world — but the second you got her home, she turned into a tornado with fangs. If that describes your household, then flip to “Squatting with Stella by Starlight” by Allie Larkin. Think a minute, and you might realize that you need the pup more than vice versa.

Like many puppy parents, you might share a bed with the furkid. But whose bed is it, really?  In “Ménage a Dog” by Alice Bradley, you’ll see that battling Buster for bed real estate is a common occurrence in lots of households.

Can’t tolerate a beggar?  Might as well give up after reading “A Dog Day of Summer” by W. Bruce Cameron because, seriously, how long can you say no to those big, sad, hungry eyes? And how can you resist using babytalk? You can’t, so go ahead — read “Dum-Diddle-Dum-Dum” by Wade Rouse and “There’s No Place Like Home, Judy” by Alec Mapa and know you’re in good company.

Finally, if you ever truly wonder whether that pooping, shedding pile of fur really loves you, then stop and read “Wuzsha, Wuzsha, Wuzsha” by Eddie Sarfaty. And pass the tissues, please.

Are you daft over doggies? Crazy about canines? Moonstruck over mutts? Then you’re going to sit up and beg for this book.

Author and editor Wade Rouse pulled together about 20 authors (counting Chelsea Handler’s dog, Chunk, who wrote the foreword) and comedians to create a treasury that’s definitely funny but that also has its serious side. I howled, I whined, I yipped and I was glad I fetched this book.

If you’re a dog lover (and you must be, if you’ve read this far), you won’t be able to resist reading what’s in here. “I’m Not the Biggest Bitch in This Relationship” is a book to fall head over tail in love with.

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Out & About

Mayor’s office to host Pride tie-dye party

Guests to make colorful shirts for ‘PEACE. LOVE. REVOLUTION’ theme

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(Photo by Prime Look/Bigstock)

The Mayor’s Office for LGBTQ Affairs will host “Love Out Loud: Tie Dye Party for Pride” on Wednesday, June 7 at 5 p.m. at the Frank D. Reeves Center of Municipal Affairs.

The event, hosted along with the DC Center for the LGBT Community and Capital Pride Alliance, will be an afternoon for community and artistry. Guests are encouraged to bring their creativity to make some colorful tie-dye shirts in line with this year’s Pride theme, “PEACE. LOVE. REVOLUTION.”

This event is free to attend and more details are available on Eventbrite

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Out & About

D.C. to celebrate LGBTQ poetry

Pride Poem-a-Day presents second installation

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(Screen capture via Vimeo)

DC Pride Poem-a-Day will present its second installation of short videos featuring LGBTQ poetry from the Washington, D.C. area to celebrate Pride month.

A new video will be released each day in June and will feature different poets reading an original poem on the theme of “heritage.”

The videos highlight LGBTQ poets from a variety of backgrounds, ethnicities, races, and countries of origin, and also poets from minority religions, multi-lingual, and disabled. 
To access the poetry, visit DC Pride Poems’ website.

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Calendar

Calendar: June 2-8

LGBTQ events in the days to come

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Friday, June 2

Center Aging: Friday Tea Time will be at 2 p.m. on Zoom. This event is a social hour for older LGBTQ+ adults. Guests can bring a beverage of choice. For more information, contact [email protected].

Go Gay DC will host “LGBTQ+ Pride Kickoff Social” at 7 p.m. at The Commentary. This event is ideal to make new friends in the LGBTQ community and enjoy the bottomless happy hour specials at Puro Gusto. Admission is free and more details are available on Eventbrite.

Saturday, June 3

Virtual Yoga Class with Jesse Z. will be at 12 p.m. online. This is a weekly class focusing on yoga, breath work, and meditation. Guests are encouraged to RSVP on the DC Center’s website, providing your name, email address, and zip code, along with any questions you may have. A link to the event will be sent at 6 pm the day before.

LGBTQ People of Color Support Group will be at 1 p.m. on Zoom. LGBTQ People of Color can come together and talk about anything affecting them in a space that strives to be safe and judgment free. There are all sorts of activities like watching movies, poetry events, storytelling, and just hanging out with others. For more details, visit thedccenter.org/poc or facebook.com/centerpoc.

Project DC Events will host “DC Pride Crawl” at 2 p.m. at Dupont Circle’s best bars. Guests are encouraged to put on their brightest and most colorful outfit, grab friends, and enjoy a day of drinks and celebration. Tickets start at $20 and can be purchased on Eventbrite

Sunday, June 4

AfroCode DC will be at 4 p.m. at Decades DC. This event will be an experience of non-stop music, dancing, and good vibes and a crossover of genres and a fusion of cultures. Tickets cost $40 and can be purchased on Eventbrite.

“Largest LGBTQIA+ Singles Flamingle” will be at 7 p.m. at THRoW Social DC. Guests can enjoy signature cocktail and wine specials, food, games, and live music while mingling with single people in the local LGBTQ community. This event is free and more details are available on Eventbrite.

Monday, June 5

Center Aging Monday Coffee and Conversation will be at 10 a.m. on Zoom. LGBT Older Adults — and friends — are invited to enjoy friendly conversations and to discuss any issues you might be dealing with. For more information, visit the Center Aging’s Facebook or Twitter.

Capital Pride Interfaith Service Planning Meeting will be at 6 p.m. on Zoom. The Capital Pride Interfaith Service is an “integrated service” respectfully demonstrating the breadth, depth, and sincerity of our faith, exposing the lie that anti-gay fundamentalists have a monopoly on faith and religion. For more details, [email protected]

Tuesday, June 6

Go Gay DC will host “LGBTQ+ Pride Reception” at 5 p.m. at Turkish Coffee Lady. This event is to foster cross-cultural connectedness and make friends in the LGBTQ+ and allied community. Attendance is free and more details are available on Eventbrite.

Pride on the Patio Events will host “LGBTQ+ Social Mixer” at 5:30 p.m. at Showroom. Dress is casual, fancy, or comfortable and guests are encouraged to bring the most authentic you to chat, laugh, and get a little crazy. This event is free and more details are available on Eventbrite

Wednesday, June 7

Job Club will be at 6 p.m. on Zoom. This is a weekly job support program to help job entrants and seekers, including the long-term unemployed, improve self-confidence, motivation, resilience and productivity for effective job searches and networking — allowing participants to move away from being merely “applicants” toward being “candidates.” For more information, email [email protected] or visit thedccenter.org/careers.

Center Aging Women’s Social & Discussion Group will be at 6:00p.m. on Zoom. This group is a place where older LGBTQ+ women can meet and socialize with one another. To register, visit the DC Center’s website

Thursday, June 8

KINETIC Presents will host “KINETIC Pride 2023 DC Weekend Pass” at 10 p.m. at four D.C. venues. This partnership with Capital Pride Alliance will feature a performance by global pop star Betty Who at Echostage, stunning visuals, and top talent. Tickets start at $149 and can be purchased on Eventbrite

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