Living
The Maryland originals
Couples from the 2004 lawsuit rejoice at state’s marriage passing
Dave Kolesar, left, and his partner, Patrick Wojahn, in Annapolis for last week's Maryland marriage bill signing. (Blade photo by Michael Key)
There’s no questioning Charles Blackburn’s love for partner Glen Dehn: He met the now-retired government worker at a party, moved in immediately and is still with him 33 years later.
Yet the pair has never walked down the aisle — not because the men didn’t want to, but because the state of Maryland said they couldn’t.
“We could never understand how a committed relationship of two gays or two lesbians could possibly hurt a heterosexual marriage and we haven’t been told yet,” says Blackburn, who, urged by a friend, signed the couple up to join a 2004 lawsuit for same-sex marriage in Maryland.
Years later, the Blackburn-Dehn couple is among 19 original plaintiffs rejoicing in the wake of a newly signed measure legalizing gay marriages in Maryland. Gov. Martin O’Malley signed the bill into law on March 1; Maryland joins D.C. and six states in legalizing gay marriages. The Civil Marriage Protection Act is scheduled to take effect in January, though a voter referendum in November could kill the measure before then.
For now, the signing brings to a close a fight that’s meandered from the failed lawsuit, to legislative hearings and finally, to the governor’s desk.
As the fight for marriage has twisted and turned, so too have the lives of those original couples — through family changes, relationship endings and new beginnings.
Yet through it all, several of the original plaintiffs tell The Blade they’re glad to have played a role in securing the rights of same-sex couples and families in Maryland and beyond.
“Whatever obstacles you face, you want to make it better for yourself but you also want to leave a path that’s a little bit better for the people who come behind you,” says Gita Deane, who joined the suit with partner Lisa Polyak. “I don’t for a minute think that we shouldn’t have done it.”
‘We had to do it’
Polyak and Deane were living the life of the average family with two young daughters when a turn at the microphone during a town hall near their Baltimore home changed everything.
“(We) just spoke about the difficulties of our lives being parents and about things we wanted to do for our kids that we couldn’t,” says Polyak, who later got a call from the American Civil Liberties Union.
The civil liberties group was looking for couples to join a lawsuit to be filed in Baltimore with the cooperation of Equality Maryland. The groups would charge that a state law denying same-sex couples the right to marry violated the Maryland Constitution.
Joining the case could mean helping pave the way for their family and similar families to enjoy the financial and emotional benefits of legal marriage. But it could also mean harassment.
“I had a great many worries about how this would impact my children,” Deane says. “When we had time to talk to the lawyer ACLU my first question was, ‘Is anybody going to send us hate mail or put up signs on our front yard?'”
Farther south in Riverdale, Md., Mikkole Mozelle was also apprehensive when her then partner Lisa Kebreau mentioned getting involved in the case she’d heard about through an email — but for different reasons.
“I guess I always thought something like this was extraordinary people fighting extraordinary struggles and we were just your everyday, average couple. It caught me off guard, but in a good way,” says Mozelle, a black woman who eventually embraced the idea of changing the largely white face of the gay marriage push.
The planned lawsuit would be one in a string filed by the ACLU, its partners and affiliates on behalf of same-sex couples seeking marriage equality in New York, Oregon, California and the state of Washington.
ACLU attorneys would eventually file suit in state court in Baltimore in July 2004 on behalf of nine couples and a widowed man. Among them were Kebreau and Mozelle, Polyak and Deane.
“It would never have been my choice to be public about my life,” Deane says. “(But) we had to do it because we had children and we have a responsibility to our children to make sure we’re able to take care of them.”
A matter of families and finance
From the beginning, the plaintiffs have argued the marriage question had less to do with certificates and ceremonies and more to do with tax breaks, health insurance and the other practical benefits that rise in importance as families grow and couples mature.
Dave Kolesar was just 18 years old when an infection led to brain surgery and a dim prognosis. Now 34, he’s in great condition, but worries along with his partner Patrick Wojahn about after effects.
They joined the case a year after Wojahn had proposed to Kolesar.
“In case something else were to happen to him, we wanted to be assured that I would be able to take care of him,” Wojahn says.
For plaintiff John Lestitian, that “what if” scenario became a reality in 2003, when his partner of more than a decade died suddenly. A subsequent battle over the home they shared and his final resting place encouraged him to join the suit.
“I’d gone through a situation of a contested will and dealing with the aftermath of the death,” he says. “My personal experience made me all the more willing to step forward.”
Yet for other plaintiffs, the choice to make their private lives personal stemmed in part from financial concerns. For instance, Charles Blackburn is blocked from sharing his partner’s federal health benefits, which he estimates could save the couple several thousand dollars each year.
Polyak and Deane estimate they’ve spent tens of thousands of dollars yearly on separate health insurance policies and the adoptions of each other’s biological children.
Despite the money spent, the couples remain financially at risk.
“We’ve done as much as we can through wills and legal things,” Deane says. “But we can only cover about eight of the 1,000 benefits that come with marriage on our own.”
Reaching the victory lap
On March 1, Patrick Wojahn and Dave Kolesar joined dozens of same-sex couples, gay lawmakers and advocates who stood behind O’Malley as he signed the historic bill in Annapolis.
“It was just electrifying,” Wojahn says. “There was so much excitement in the air.”
The bill-signing ceremony came just one week after the Maryland Senate voted 25 to 22 to approve the measure, and nearly five years after the Maryland Court of Appeals voted 4 to 3 to uphold state law barring same-sex marriage, ending the ACLU’s suit.
The ACLU and Equality Maryland immediately took the push to the General Assembly, and the plaintiffs largely went back to their normal lives.
Wojahn and Kolesar married in D.C last year, as did Polyak and Deane, who said they tired of waiting on legislators.
Lestitian found a new love and also married in D.C. in 2010, while Mozelle and partner Kebreau split in early 2009.
Still, Mozelle says she believes her partner is as pleasantly surprised as she is that the legislation went through.
“I feared that it wouldn’t,” she says, “but I prayed that it would.”
Some of the couples, like Wojahn and Kolesar, plan to re-marry in Maryland to ensure all of their rights.
For Blackburn and Dehn, both in their 70s, the ceremony they hope to have if the law holds would be their first.
But marriage or not, after 33 years, they know where they stand.
“I moved in a month after we met,” Blackburn says. “We just knew we had found something special in each other and it remained that way.”
Real Estate
Celebrate the power of homeownership this Fourth of July
Owning a home is powerful act of self-determination
This Fourth of July, celebrate more than independence: celebrate the power of LGBTQ+ homeownership. Explore resources, rights, and representation with GayRealEstate.com, the trusted leader in LGBTQ+ real estate for over 30 years.
Home is more than a house: it’s a symbol of freedom
As the fireworks light up the sky this Fourth of July, LGBTQ+ individuals and families across the country are not just celebrating the nation’s independence — they’re celebrating personal milestones of freedom, visibility, and the right to call a place their own.
For many in the LGBTQ+ community, owning a home represents more than stability — it’s a powerful act of self-determination. After generations of discrimination and exclusion from housing opportunities, more LGBTQ+ people are stepping into homeownership with pride and purpose.
Why homeownership matters to the LGBTQ+ community
While progress has been made, LGBTQ+ homebuyers still face unique challenges, including:
- Housing discrimination, even in states with legal protections
- Limited access to LGBTQ+ friendly realtors and resources
- Concerns about safety and acceptance in new neighborhoods
- Lack of representation in the real estate industry
That’s why the Fourth of July is a perfect time to reflect not just on freedom as a concept, but on how that freedom is expressed in the real world — through ownership, safety, and pride in where and how we live.
Finding LGBTQ+ Friendly Neighborhoods
One of the top concerns for LGBTQ+ buyers is whether they’ll feel safe, accepted, and welcome in their new neighborhood. Thanks to evolving attitudes and stronger community support, many cities across the U.S. now offer inclusive, affirming environments.
Some of the best cities for LGBTQ+ home buyers include:
- Wilton Manors, Fla. – A vibrant LGBTQ+ hub with strong community ties
- Palm Springs, Calif. – A longtime favorite for LGBTQ+ homeowners
- Asheville, N.C. – Progressive and artsy, with growing LGBTQ+ visibility
- Portland, Ore. – Inclusive, eco-conscious, and diverse
- Philadelphia, PA – Rich in history and LGBTQ+ community leadership
When you work with an LGBTQ+ friendly realtor, you get insight into more than property values — you get a real perspective on where you’ll feel most at home.
Navigating the real estate process with confidence
Whether you’re a first-time gay homebuyer or preparing to sell your home as an LGBTQ+ couple, it’s essential to understand your rights and options. Here are a few key tips:
1. Work with a trusted LGBTQ+ real estate agent
Representation matters. A gay realtor, lesbian real estate agent, or LGBTQ+ friendly agent understands the unique concerns you may face and advocates for you every step of the way.
Use GayRealEstate.com to connect with LGBTQ+ real estate agents near you. For over 30 years, we’ve helped LGBTQ+ buyers and sellers find their ideal home and a professional who respects their identity.
2. Know your legal protections
While federal law (via the Fair Housing Act and Supreme Court rulings) prohibits housing discrimination based on sexual orientation or gender identity, enforcement can vary by state. Make sure to research:
- State-level housing discrimination laws
- Local LGBTQ+ protections and resources
- What to do if you experience discrimination during a transaction
3. Secure inclusive financing
While most lenders follow fair lending rules, it’s smart to seek out banks or credit unions with LGBTQ+ inclusive policies and a history of non-discriminatory lending practices.
4. Plan for the future as a family
For same-sex couples, especially unmarried partners, it’s vital to review how you’ll hold the title, designate beneficiaries, and plan your estate.
Ask your agent or attorney about:
- Joint tenancy with right of survivorship
- Living trusts
- Powers of attorney and healthcare proxies
Selling a home as an LGBTQ+ homeowner
If you’re listing your home, working with a gay-friendly real estate agent ensures your identity and story are honored — not hidden — in the process.
Highlight:
- Your community connections
- Your home’s role in creating a safe space
- Local LGBTQ+ resources to attract like-minded buyers
Showcasing the full value of your home includes sharing what it meant to live there authentically and safely.
Your home, your freedom
The Fourth of July reminds us that freedom isn’t just an abstract idea — it’s lived every day in the spaces where we find comfort, love, and belonging. For the LGBTQ+ community, the right to own and thrive in a home is part of the larger journey toward full equality.
At GayRealEstate.com, we believe every LGBTQ+ person deserves:
- A safe place to live
- A community that welcomes them
- An advocate in the home buying or selling process
Ready to make a move?
Whether you’re dreaming of your first home, upgrading with your partner, or selling a space that helped shape your identity, GayRealEstate.com is your trusted partner. With our nationwide network of gay realtors, lesbian real estate agents, and LGBTQ+ friendly professionals, we make your journey smooth, respectful, and informed.
Visit GayRealEstate.com to:
- Search LGBTQ+ friendly homes
- Connect with inclusive real estate agents
- Access free guides for buyers and sellers
- Protect your rights and get expert advice
This Fourth of July, celebrate more than independence — celebrate your freedom to live, love, and own with pride.
Did you melt like the Wicked Witch of the West this week?
As summer temperatures rise, keeping your home or apartment cool during a heat wave can become both a comfort issue and a financial challenge. One of the most effective ways to keep a home cool is to prevent heat from entering in the first place. Sunlight streaming through windows can significantly raise indoor temperatures. Consider the following solutions:
• Close blinds or curtains during the hottest parts of the day. Blackout curtains or thermal drapes can reduce heat gain by up to 30%.
• Install reflective window films to block UV rays and reduce solar heat without sacrificing natural light.
• Use outdoor shading solutions such as awnings (yes, the ones you removed because they were “dated”) and shutters to limit direct sunlight.
Fans are a cost-effective way to circulate air and create a wind-chill effect that makes rooms feel cooler.
• Ceiling fans should rotate counterclockwise in the summer to push cool air down.
• Box fans or oscillating fans can be placed near windows to pull in cooler evening air or push hot air out.
• Create a cross-breeze by opening windows on opposite sides of your home and positioning fans to direct airflow through the space.
• For an extra cooling effect, place a bowl of ice or a frozen water bottle in front of a fan to circulate chilled air.
To optimize natural ventilation, open windows early in the morning or late in the evening when outdoor temperatures drop. This allows cooler air to flow in and helps ventilate heat that built up during the day.
Appliances and electronics generate a surprising amount of heat. To reduce indoor temperatures:
• Avoid using the oven or stove during the day; opt for no-cook meals, microwave cooking, or grilling outside.
• Run heat-producing appliances like dishwashers and clothes dryers in the early morning or late evening.
• Unplug electronics when not in use, as even standby power can add heat to your space.
• Switching to energy-efficient LED lightbulbs can also reduce ambient heat compared to incandescent lighting.
If you do use an air conditioner, maximize its effectiveness by:
• Setting it to a reasonable temperature—around 76–78°F when you’re home and higher when you’re away.
• Cleaning or replacing filters regularly to maintain airflow and efficiency.
• Sealing gaps around doors and windows to prevent cool air from escaping. (Didn’t we all have a parent who said, “Close the door. You’re letting all the cool out?”)
• Using a programmable thermostat to optimize cooling schedules and reduce energy use.
If it is not cost-prohibitive, adding insulation in attics and walls can greatly reduce heat transfer. Solar panels that reflect heat can also help, as well as offset the cost of their installation. Adding weatherstripping around doors and windows, sealing cracks, and using door sweeps can make a significant difference in keeping heat out and cool air in.
Natural and eco-conscious methods can also help cool your home.
• Snake plants, ferns, or rubber trees can improve air quality and slightly cool the air through transpiration.
• White or reflective roof paint can reduce roof temperatures significantly.
• Cooling mats or bedding can make sleeping more comfortable without cranking up the A/C.
For renters or those who can’t make permanent modifications, there are still plenty of ways to keep cool.
• Use portable fans and A/C units instead of built-in systems, making sure they are the correct size for your space.
• Removable window film or static cling tinting can reflect heat without violating your lease.
• Install tension rod curtains or temporary blackout panels instead of hardware-mounted window coverings.
• Add draft blockers and weatherstripping tape that can be applied and removed without damage.
• Cover floors with light-colored rugs to reflect heat rather than absorb it.
• If allowed, use temporary adhesive hooks to hang reflective materials or light-filtering fabrics over windows.
Even if your space is warm, you can still take steps to help your body stay cool.
• Wear light, breathable fabrics like cotton or linen.
• Stay hydrated and avoid caffeine or alcohol during peak heat hours.
• Take cool showers or use damp cloths on your neck and wrists to bring your body temperature down.
Keeping your home or apartment cool in the summer doesn’t have to be expensive or energy-intensive. With a few adjustments such as blocking sunlight, optimizing airflow, using fans effectively, and making renter-friendly upgrades, you can create a more comfortable indoor environment while keeping energy bills in check.
Valerie M. Blake is a licensed Associate Broker in D.C., Maryland, and Virginia with RLAH @properties. Call or text her at 202-246-8602, email her at DCHomeQuest.com, or follow her on Facebook at TheRealst8ofAffairs.
Real Estate
The world’s on fire and D.C. is on sale (sort of)
Prices are up, but then again, nothing makes sense anymore
ICE is disappearing people, revered government agencies are shuttering, and who knows if we’ll be in World War III next week? But can you believe prices in D.C. are actually still up 6.3% since last year? It doesn’t make sense, and perhaps that does make sense, because nothing seems to make any sense any more.
That said, there are some parts of our market that are truly suffering. The interest rates, which have been up, up, up for about four years now, are the ongoing rain on our market’s military parade. Combine that with 75,000 federal employees taking a buyout nationwide, and DOGE cuts eliminating around 40,000 federal jobs in the District (per estimates by the D.C. CFO), not to mention thousands of other job losses in non-governmental organizations due to funding and program cuts, and you’ve got a case of uncertainty, and downright unaffordability in the pool of otherwise would-be buyers.
This has had a marked impact on properties that starter-home buyers and low- to mid-level employees would otherwise buy, most notably condominium and cooperative apartment units. These properties have already slowed in our market thanks to the profound impact that higher interest rates have had on their monthly carrying costs—pair that with job insecurity, and a lot of condos are proving to be very difficult to sell indeed.
So how is the average sale price up in our market?
The increase is almost entirely due to the resounding strength of the single-family home market, especially in upper Northwest D.C., where it is still quite common to see bidding wars, even on properties pushing past the $3M mark. It seems that buyers in that echelon are less impacted by a few percentage points in the interest rate, and less concerned about their job security. Notably, those buyers are often married with children and have an absolute need for more space, must stay in the area due to one spouse’s job, or the kid’s friend group, regardless of whether the cost of owning is thousands of dollars more per month than it would have been in 2020 or 2021. The continued appreciation in these neighborhoods defies imagination.
So, what to do if you are not one of those lucky enough to be shopping for a $3M home? The short answer: wait. If you want more space, rent your current place out and learn the joys of being a landlord while someone else pays your mortgage. Need the equity from your current home to buy your next place? Get a home equity line of credit, or loan, and pull the equity out of your current place to buy the next one. Or—and I have never recommended this before in 21 years of being a Realtor—rent for a few years. Sure, I’d love to list and sell your condo so you can climb the real estate ladder, but it might just be a waste of time, money or both if you could just ride out this storm and sell in a DOGE-less future.
All this said, there are some condos that seem to be immune from this recent negative news. Anecdotally, it feels like it’s the truly special ones that do just fine no matter the market. Our recent listing in Capitol Hill had a view from every one of its 15 windows of the Supreme Court. Sold in five days with six offers. Another condo was on the top two floors of a townhouse and had the coolest black wood floors that gleamed like a grand piano. Sold in four days at full price.
So, all is not for naught if you have a condo or home in an area that people want to be in, with nice space, light, amenities and a certain je ne sais quois. And, as long as we have a democracy in a few years, my experience says our market will be back, stronger than ever, really soon.
David Bediz is a Realtor and mortgage loan broker for the Bediz Group LLC and Home Starts Here, LLC. Reach him at [email protected].
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