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Queery: Fred Sainz

The HRC marketing/communications director answers 20 gay questions

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Fred Sainz, HRC, Human Rights Campaign, gay news, Queery
Fred Sainz, HRC, Human Rights Campaign, gay news, Queery

Fred Sainz (Washington Blade photo by Michael Key)

It’s not a particularly good time to ask Fred Sainz about the Human Rights Campaign National Dinner.

It’s a weekday morning just days before the annual event and he, like many at the LGBT rights organization, is bogged down in details and logistics.

“It’s almost like giving birth,” he says. “You know, it’s an incredibly exciting event but you kind of can’t wait for it to be over too.”

The event is Saturday evening at the Convention Center (801 Mt. Vernon Place N.W.) and is sold out. Newark Mayor Cory A. Booker, NAACP President Ben Jealous and actress Sally Field are slated to appear. A troupe from Cirque du Soleil will perform. About 3,000 are expected. Details are at hrcnationaldinner.org.

Sainz came to HRC about two-and-a-half years ago and works as vice president of communications and marketing. The 44-year-old Miami-area native says it’s been satisfying work.

“It’s really been the privilege of a lifetime to be able to do this work and a special honor to be able to work here at this time in the movement’s history,” he says. “I arrived one week before the ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell’ repeal bill dropped in May 2010 so it has been a roller coaster and truly one of the greatest experiences of my life.”

Sainz, a former Republican, went to school in Washington, served in the first Bush White House, then moved to San Diego to work on the ’96 Republican National Convention. He stayed there working at various jobs over the next 14 years before going to Denver where he spent two years working at the Gill Foundation, which he says was “amazing” and prepared him for his position at HRC.

Sainz is “dating someone special” but doesn’t go into details. He lives in Washington and enjoys working out, movies and traveling in his free time.

How long have you been out and who was the hardest person to tell? 

I’ve been out since I was 28 years old and I’m now 44 so it’s been 16 years. My father was the hardest to tell. He and I haven’t spoken since I came out.

Who’s your LGBT hero?

Harvey Milk

What’s Washington’s best nightspot, past or present? 

I’m boring so I don’t really know of many but I love Town for Bear Happy Hour on Friday nights.

Describe your dream wedding.

I think weddings (not marriage, but weddings) suck up a lot of money and create unnecessary anxiety. I think a city hall marriage with people that you are close to is preferable.

What non-LGBT issue are you most passionate about?

Virtually any social justice issue.

What historical outcome would you change?

Castro’s takeover of Cuba in 1959. My parents immigrated to this country from Cuba. Imagine leaving the country of your birth and immigrating to another country, virtually penniless and without speaking the language at 28 years old; that’s what they did. In search of better lives and to be free from oppression, they came to the U.S.

What’s been the most memorable pop culture moment of your lifetime?

The release of Madonna’s first album.

On what do you insist?

Honesty and straightforwardness.

What was your last Facebook post or Tweet?

About HRC’s National Dinner this Saturday.

If your life were a book, what would the title be?

“The Indignity of Being a Dog”

If science discovered a way to change sexual orientation, what would you do?

Nothing. I love being gay. I believe that God created me this way.

What do you believe in beyond the physical world? 

I believe in Karma. Do right unto others because if not, a higher life force has a sense of humor.

What’s your advice for LGBT movement leaders?

Make every decision through the lens of young people and you’ll be doing the right thing.

What would you walk across hot coals for?

A vodka/cran on a Friday night.

What LGBT stereotype annoys you most?

That all gay men are funny, like Jack from “Will & Grace.”

What’s your favorite LGBT movie?

“The Birdcage”

What’s the most overrated social custom?

Putting up the toilet seat. Why?

What trophy or prize do you most covet?

“Jeopardy!” champion.

What do you wish you’d known at 18?

Me at 44.

Why Washington?

It’s the nation’s capital and where laws that change our lives will be passed.

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PHOTOS: 2026 Capital Pride Parade

Large crowds attend annual LGBTQ march in Washington, D.C.

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David Archuleta is one of the Grand Marshals of the 2026 Capital Pride Parade. (Washington Blade photo by Michael Key)

The 2026 Capital Pride Parade was held in Washington, D.C. on Saturday, June 20.

(Washington Blade photos by Michael Key, Robert Rapanut and Landon Shackelford)

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Theater

‘Feeling Afraid’ explores life of a neurotic stand-up comic

Navigating sex, work, and possibly love in London

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Steven Webb in ‘Feeling Afraid As If Something Terrible Is Going To Happen’ (Photo by DJ Corey)

‘Feeling Afraid As If Something Terrible Is Going to Happen’
Through July 12
Studio Theatre
1501 14th St., N.W.
$55-$102
Studiotheatre.org

Wordily yet rightly titled, solo show “Feeling Afraid As If Something Terrible Is Going To Happen” dives deeply into the world of a neurotic stand-up comic as he navigates sex, work, and possibly love in London. 

Busy arranging hookups and dates on “The App,” the 36-year-old gay funnyman juggles a full dance card; still he’s never been in a romantic relationship. While he’s willing to give love a shot, he’s not pressed about it. As he says, he harbors no fear of dying alone.

Currently making its American premiere at Studio Theatre, this darkly humorous Edinburgh Fringe import features terrific out English actor Steven Webb as The Comedian who’s about to explore what it means to spend all his time with one man. 

At Studio’s intimate Mead Theatre, Kat Heath’s minimal set says standard comedy club (fluorescent tube lighting, the mic with a long cord, a single stool backed by a rose-colored curtain), but gay playwright Marcelo Dos Santos has conjured something much more than a live comedy set. 

Yes, The Comedian bounces onstage in his red Converse high tops, jeans, and pink shirt with a huge mouth emblazoned on the back, but he delivers more than jokes. At times hilariously self-deprecating, then dark, and occasionally a lesson on what makes standup work, this is a layered, well-acted piece.

With Webb (a keen caricaturist of types and voices) playing all the parts while conducting The Comedian’s hilariously frenetic interior monologue, “Feeling Afraid” takes us through a summer of love. It seems after six chaste dates with The American, our nervous hero has found Mr. Right. The American is earnest, smart, hesitant to initiate sex. He’s also well built with a beautiful smile. And strangely, he’s been medically advised not to laugh aloud.  

The Comedian delights in the joys of new love: dates, first kisses, sex, and then suddenly spending all of his time with the adored. Visits to art galleries become fun. Eating home cooked meals followed by grim documentaries is a thing. The Comedian is beguiled as his own boyish figure fills out, but something isn’t right. He can’t entirely relax.

Along the way we meet the Aussie doctor, our protagonist’s longtime hookup; a young runner with some exceptional body parts; the random third in a failed threesome; grumpy working comics, male and female; and an ineffectual counselor. 

Webb gives a lightning-fast performance that boggles the mind (in terms velocity and virtuosity). He can be impish, very impish. He’s nervous energy incarnate, flashing jazz hands, grimacing but handsome when still. He’s likeable, a necessity when delivering a hilariously rude joke just feet away from two stone-faced audience members. (Perhaps they were laughing on the inside? At any rate, they stayed through the end the show.)

Produced by the team behind Fringe hits “Fleabag” and “Baby Reindeer,” small stage works that were developed into major TV screen successes, “Feeling Afraid” is funny for sure, and it’s also highly confessional, sexually explicit, and raw.

Written by Dos Santos during COVID lockdown, the piece was a smash hit in the 2022 Edinburgh Fringe before finding further success in London. Its depiction of a youngish queer guy navigating the big city rings entirely true. Like so much Fringe stuff, the one-man show is delightfully lewd and standup inspired.

One little moan: the show closes cleverly but too abruptly with its star dashing offstage without sufficiently basking in the admiration and applause of his thoroughly chuffed audience.

They say third time’s a charm, and regarding “Feeling Afraid,” I’d agree. After two performance cancellations (first for laryngitis and the second involving faulty air conditioning on an especially muggy June evening), I made my third trek to Studio where I found both the actor and AC in very fine fettle. And truly, Webb’s work was more than worth the wait.

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Photos

PHOTOS: Baltimore Pride Festival

LGBTQ celebration held at Druid Hill Park

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A scene from the 2026 Baltimore Pride Festival. (Washington Blade photo by Linus Berggren)

The 2026 Baltimore Pride Festival, “Pride in the Park,” was held at Druid Hill Park on Sunday, June 14.

(Washington Blade photos by Linus Berggren)

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