Living
Other mothers
Local performers honor their drag moms
Ba’Naka, Shi-Queeta-Lee and Lena Lett (Washington Blade photo by Michael Key)
Spend any real time in the gay world and you know there are many who take drag very seriously, from the elaborate routines to the familial ties.
Since this weekend is Mother’s Day, we asked a few local performers why drag families are important. It didn’t take long to realize it’s about a lot more than borrowing lipstick or getting input on a new gown.
“It truly is family,” says Muffy Blake-Stephyns. “Few people know me quite as well as my drag family. We complete each other’s sentences, we know just what to say or do to comfort one another. We have each other’s back.”
“We’re closer than your actual blood relatives,” says Alexandra B. Childs. “We sew, rhinestone, glue, paint, staple, smile and lip sync our hearts out for one another. Our drag family hangs out together in and out of the drag scene. Drag events are like a weekly family reunion for us with a lot more hairspray and sequins involved than most others.”
“Drag families are just an elaborate support system,” Ba’Naka says. “A sisterhood that is there for you when you need it.”
Shi-Queeta-Lee (Washington Blade photo by Michael Key)
Drag name: Shi-Queeta-Lee
Boy name: Jerry VanHook
Drag mother’s name: Chyna Pendar’vis/Benjamin Smith
How did you meet? I met Chyna Pendar’vis (RIP) through a friend of mine, Don Pendar’vis (RIP). I was competing for the Miss Magic Pageant 1998, which I won singing live Whitney Houston “Your Love Is My Love.” The pageant is part of the Gay Softball league here in D.C. called Chesapeake and Potomac Softball League (CAPS). I painted myself for it and Don came over to help me and he said, “Girl you look a hot ghetto mess.” So he calls Chyna to come and do my makeup and clothes. I was always told the first drag queen that paints you and put you in drag is your drag mother. She taught me the ropes on drag life and the drama that comes with it.
What does she mean to you? She means the world to me. Taught me so much on life in the gay community. How to get booked for drag shows, how to host to get patrons excited to see drag queens perform. She was a pageant girl, so she guided me on how to compete as well. Chyna was a diva at her craft, also had a loving family that supported the art form. I had a loving family that supported me.
Drag name: Kuji Lee
Boy name: Kuji Mah Ajani
Drag mother’s name: Shi-Queeta-Lee aka Jerry VanHook
How did you meet? I met my drag mom at a nightclub called “The Edge” that used to be located in Southeast Washington near the Navy Yard Marine Base. Shi-Queeta-Lee wasn’t born yet (I don’t believe), so the first three years of our interaction was with Jerry. Later I ran into her again and she introduced me as her child, which I didn’t dispute. It was then that I began to carry the last name “Lee.” A few years later, the birth of Shi-Queeta-Lee arrived in D.C. and started hosting a drag show at the famous Bachelor’s Mill. I was infatuated with drag performances for many years that I began to secretly desire to hit the stage as a male entertainer one day and Shi-Queeta-Lee was the first to give me my start.
What does she mean to you? Shi-Queeta-Lee is and will always be the catalyst of our family. She is also a well-known public figure who has endured ridicule, harsh criticism, etc. within our gay community for believing that the drag-gay/bi/transgender community can reach higher ground if presented in a different framework that connects all genders, all races. She embodies diversities, complexity, independence, boldness, unconditional love, vulnerability, creativity and more. She never let anyone or anything halt her goals or dreams and she makes sure we as her family apply those same beliefs.
Drag name: Shelby Blake-Stephyns
Boy name: Jon Rybka-Wachhaus
Drag mother’s name: Veronica Blake (Rob Amos)
How did you meet: I had been doing drag for approximately two years and had become a member of The Academy of Washington, Inc. We had become close and when my previous mother and I had a falling out, she asked me if I would be her daughter because she saw so much in me that wasn’t being nurtured and needed to be. And the rest, as they say is history.
What does your drag mother mean to you? Veronica means the world to me. Many times I get so many ideas in my head that it’s great to have someone there to help you sort it all out to make you the best you can be. She can be tough as leather sometimes but she always has my best interest at heart.
Daniel Hays A.K.A. Muffy Blake Stephyns (Washington Blade photo by Michael Key)
Drag name: Muffy Blake-Stephyns
Boy name: Daniel L. Hays
Drag mother’s name: Shelby Blake Stephyns/Jon Rybka-Wachhaus
How did you meet? I met Shelby at a benefit drag show at Freddie’s Beach Bar. I had been doing drag for a number of years, but at that particular time I was going through some health challenges and was battling depression. She was just kind of the perfect prescription. She was incredibly caring, uplifting and made me want to continue performing. Over the next few weeks we talked pretty much every day. Before long it was official, I had changed “families” and Shelby became my mom. I think I can safely say that were it not for Shelby coming into my life, in all likelihood Muffy would have hung up her heels.
What does she mean to you? My drag mother truly means the world to me. I know she loves me unconditionally and that is something that is felt in return. If I need something, I know without a doubt that if there is any way my drag mother can help she will be there, no questions asked. I am truly blessed to have Shelby Blake Stephyns as my mama.
Delila B. Lee (Washington Blade photo by Michael Key)
Drag name: Delila B. Lee
Boy name: Delonte’ Ladson
Drag mother’s name: Shi-Queeta-Lee/Jerry Vanhook
How did you meet? I met Shi-Queeta-Lee in 2009 at Town Danceboutique. And I was amazed of the illusion she gave as Tina Turner. She got me into drag by teaching me how confidence is the key. And completely being myself. I was very interested in becoming a drag queen. The desire to transform into a beautiful diva and lip sync on stage. I first performed in 2011.
What does she mean to you? A drag family is being together, supporting and loving one another. It should be treasured forever. Most of us don’t have supportive families because they don’t accept and tolerate our lifestyles. Having a drag family means knowing you’ll be loved unconditionally. I’m proud to call Mother Lee my drag mother.
Ba’Naka (Washington Blade photo by Michael Key)
Drag name: Ba’Naka
Boy name: Dustin Michael Schaad
Drag mother’s name: When they say it takes a village they weren’t joking! I don’t have one singular drag mother. From Florida to D.C., I’ve collected a harem of Mommie Dearests but the most influential have been D.C. icons Lena Lett and Kristina Kelly (David Lett and Chris Smith).
How did you meet? I met Kristina Kelly at Apex when I first moved to D.C. She was the first queen to give me a chance in this city. I began regularly performing with her at various D.C. venues: Apex, Omega, Remington’s, Be-Bar. She taught me how to paint a face and take the stage. As for Lena, she has never been my official drag mother but I’ve learned more from her than any other. From her I learned how to host a show and command an audience (hosting is 10 times harder than performing). Lena over the years has given me some of the best advice (not that I always listen — I’m hard headed) that I have ever received.
What does she mean to you? My drag mothers have been a source of wisdom, experience and comfort over the years.
Drag name: Hope B. Childs
Boy name: Steven Ramsey
Drag mother’s name: Destiny B. Childs/Richard Legg
How did you meet? I met my drag mother years ago when I tried to commit suicide. She and her husband picked me up and let me live with them. She helped me become the true me. I started in the drag scene as her dresser and anywhere she went, I went. Rhinestoning her shoes and outfits and putting her outfits together. I first started doing drag without her really knowing (not a good idea to doing something behind your mother’s back). She helps me with whatever I need.
What does she mean to you? She is my best friend she means the world to me. She’s not my drag mom she is my mom.
Alexandra B. Childs (Washington Blade photo by Michael Key)
Drag name: Alexandra B. Childs (Miss Capital Pride 2012)
Boy name: Chad Phillips
Drag mother’s name: Destiny B. Childs/Richard Legg
How did you meet? I met Destiny at Freddie’s Beach Bar in Crystal City, shortly after I moved to D.C. and came out. Theater was always something that I enjoyed and drag to me is an extension of that. I had toyed with the idea of trying drag and voiced it several times to some people. The first time I was put into drag was by Destiny’s drag mother, Ophelia Bottoms. After that it was something that I knew that I loved and the creativity is endless. Destiny took me in and gave me advice and sources for items and ideas to advance in the craft. And here I am, Miss Capital Pride 2012 about to step down and I owe it all to my mother and the family that we call the Childs clan!
What does she mean to you? Destiny/ Ric is more than a drag mother. We have a friendship that is more than just lashes and lipstick. Destiny is that person who knows my look from across the room, the one who is honest enough to say “Girl, not that hair,” the one who magically has the Mary Poppins “bag of stuff” if we forget something or need something. She is a person who in or out of drag consistently gives back to the community and those around her.
Real Estate
Tips for buying a house in Rehoboth Beach
And why it’s a great fit for the LGBTQ community
If you’ve ever dreamed of owning a charming beach house where flip-flops are considered formalwear and sunsets are your daily entertainment, Rehoboth Beach, Del., might just be your dream come true. It’s not just a beautiful coastal town—it’s also a long celebrated safe haven and vibrant hub for the LGBTQ community. Let’s dive into why Rehoboth Beach is a fabulous choice and how to make a savvy beach house purchase.
Why Rehoboth Is a Vibe (especially for the LGBTQ community)
1. A Welcoming, Inclusive Community
Rehoboth Beach has been lovingly nicknamed the “Nation’s Summer Capital,” and it’s not just because of its proximity to D.C. For decades, Rehoboth has built a reputation as a warm, inclusive, and LGBTQ-friendly destination. From gay-owned businesses to LGBTQ events and nightlife, this is a town where you can truly be yourself.
2. Packed Social Calendar
Poodle Beach, the LGBTQ beach hangout just south of the boardwalk, is always buzzing in the summer. Events like Rehoboth Beach Bear Weekend, Women’s FEST, and CAMP Rehoboth’s myriad of social and wellness events bring people together all year round. That’s right—you’ll never be bored here unless you want to be.
3. Small Town Charm Meets Big City Culture
You get art galleries, drag brunches, live theater, eclectic cuisine, and adorable boutiques—basically everything your soul craves—without the chaos and crowds of major cities. It’s quaint but never boring. Think: Key West vibes with a Delaware zip code.
Tips for Buying Your Dream Beach House
1. Know Your Budget and Think Long Term. Beachfront and near-beach properties come at a premium. Expect to pay a bit more for proximity to the sand and ocean views.
2. Choose Your Neighborhood Wisely. Do you want to be walking distance from the action on the boardwalk? Or do you prefer something more secluded in areas like North Shores or Henlopen Acres?
3. Rental Potential. If you’re not living there full time, your beach house could work overtime as a vacation rental. Rehoboth Beach has a healthy short-term rental market, especially in peak summer. Often times LGBTQ travelers actively seek inclusive, affirming places to stay.
4. Weather the Weather. Like all coastal areas, Rehoboth comes with a side of salt air and occasional storms. Invest in a good home inspection, especially for older homes, and be prepared for the maintenance that comes with beachfront living (yes, that includes sand everywhere).
5. Work With a Local Real Estate Agent. Look for an agent who knows Rehoboth inside and out and understands the unique needs of LGBTQ buyers. This isn’t just a house — it’s your happy place. You want someone who sees that and says, “Let’s find your sanctuary.”
Buying a beach house in Rehoboth Beach isn’t just about real estate — it’s about finding a space that reflects your lifestyle, values, and need for both community and calm. Whether it becomes your full-time home, your weekend escape, or your Airbnb side hustle, Rehoboth welcomes you with open arms (and maybe a mimosa).
Want personalized tips on navigating the Rehoboth Beach real estate market? Let’s chat! I’ll bring the listings if you bring the sunscreen.
Justin Noble is a Realtor with The Burns & Noble Group with Sotheby’s International Realty, licensed in D.C., Maryland, and Delaware. Reach him at [email protected] or 202-234-3344.
Real Estate
Impact of federal gov’t RIF on D.C.’s rental market
A seismic economic change for local property owners
In a move that could redefine the federal government workforce and reshape the economic fabric of Washington, D.C., President Donald Trump has announced his intentions to significantly reduce federal government spending as well as the number of people the federal government employs.
Calling the federal bureaucracy “bloated” and “out of control,” Trump has repeatedly expressed his desire to cut thousands of federal jobs. While these cuts align with his long-standing push to “drain the swamp,” they come with potential and real collateral damage, especially for landlords in the D.C. area who have relied on government employees as some of their most reliable and long-term tenants.
The potential reduction of thousands of jobs in a city built around government work is not just a political shift—it’s a seismic economic change for the city government as well as for local property owners who have invested in the predictability of a near-constant demand for workers in the federal government agencies, government contractors and the economic ecosystem they sustain.
For landlords, government workers have represented ideal tenants: strong income, long-term leases, and responsible rental histories. Now, that foundation is being shaken in a battle by the Administration against a workforce which is the backbone of the Washington area’s overall economy, and especially its rental market.
With uncertainty looming, landlords are left in a difficult position. If widespread layoffs come to fruition, rental vacancies could spike, rental prices would drop, and previously secure investment properties might become financial liabilities. The sudden shift forces landlords to consider their next moves: how to support tenants facing job losses, how to adapt to a changing market, and how to ensure their own financial stability amid the uncertainty.
For D.C. landlords, this isn’t just about policy shifts or budget cuts, it’s about economic livelihood. The challenge ahead isn’t about just reacting to change, but proactively preparing for it, ensuring they can weather the storm of political maneuvering.
Potential Consequences for D.C. Landlords
- 1. Increased Risk of Non-Payment of Rent
- Job losses may lead to late or missed rent payments
- As affected tenants struggle financially, they may ask to break their lease to live elsewhere or even move out of the region
- Eviction lawsuits may rise, leading to a long and expensive process for landlords, all while not being able to rent their property to paying tenants.
- 2. Higher Vacancy Rates
- If many government employees leave the D.C. region in search of work elsewhere, the rental demand could decline significantly
- Rental properties may sit empty longer, requiring landlords to lower rents to attract new tenants and creating even more financial loss
3. More Competition from Other Landlords
- As many more units are vacant on the market, all competing for the same pool of potential tenants, older and smaller rentals, and those located further out from the core of the city will all struggle to find quality renters.
- Landlords will need to offer other ways to attract and retain tenants, such as incentives, which could quickly overwhelm the finances of smaller landlords who cannot keep up.
Proactive Strategies for Landlords
To mitigate risks and ensure future rental success, landlords should consider these defensive measures:
1. Strengthen Tenant Relationships and Communication
- Encourage tenants to communicate if they anticipate financial hardship due to job loss.
- Work out temporary payment plans or partial payments to prevent full non-payment or eviction.
- Provide guidance on rental assistance programs available in D.C.
2. Offer Flexible Lease Terms
- Consider shorter-term leases than a full 12-month term to accommodate the needs of tenants who may be uncertain about their long-term employment status.
- Offer lease renewals at the same rent amount to keep stable tenants and avoid turnover
3. Diversify Tenant Base
- If a large portion of tenants are government workers, a landlord may want to market to a broader audience or professionals in private industries.
- Advertise on platforms that cater to diverse tenant pools, including students and international workers.
4. Adjust Screening Criteria Thoughtfully
- While it’s important to ensure financial stability, consider creditworthiness, assets, and rental history rather than just employment status.
- Consider alternative income sources, like family members assisting, part-time work or freelance gigs.
5. Protect Cash Flow with Rent Guarantee Options
- Explore rental insurance policies or rent guarantee services to cover losses in case of non-payment.
- Consider co-signers or guarantors on leases for new tenants in vulnerable industries, just in case.
6. Adjust Rental Pricing to Stay Competitive
- Monitor the D.C. rental market and adjust pricing accordingly to attract new tenants.
- Consider offering move-in incentives as a way to stand out. Be creative! Sometimes things you can offer are different and may catch someone’s eye
Long-Term Planning for Rental Success
- Build reserves to cover expenses during potential vacancies or rent shortfalls.
- Invest in property upgrades to make rentals more attractive to a broader audience, such as young professionals or remote workers.
- Consider diversifying property holdings to include areas that are less reliant on government employment.
By taking proactive steps, landlords can safeguard their investments while supporting tenants through economic uncertainty, ultimately leading to a more stable and resilient rental business.
Scott Bloom is owner and senior property manager at Columbia Property Management. For more information, visit ColumbiaPM.com.
As the spring market hits its stride, we are beginning to see more inventory and an increase in days on the market in parts of the DMV. This may result in professional home inspections becoming routine parts of contract offers again. A thorough home inspection can help catch safety issues early and is an opportunity to learn about the operation and maintenance of items in your home.
Pay attention to flickering lights, frequently tripped breakers, and discolored outlets—these are signs of potential electrical hazards. Outdated wiring, overloaded outlets, and faulty appliances can lead to electrical fires.
Structural issues are often overlooked until it’s too late. Crumbling foundations, weak or damaged stairs, loose railings, and uneven flooring can cause trips and falls. Water damage from leaks or flooding can weaken the integrity of floors and walls, creating a risk of collapse.
Toxic chemicals can pose serious threats to health and safety, often without obvious warning signs. Understanding and addressing these risks is crucial for maintaining a safe living environment for you and your loved ones.
Household products such as cleaners, pesticides, air fresheners, and even cosmetics can emit volatile organic compounds (VOCs). These compounds, when inhaled regularly, can cause a range of health issues including headaches, respiratory problems, hormonal disruptions, and in some cases, even cancer. To minimize these risks, homeowners should opt for low-VOC or VOC-free products, ventilate regularly, and consider investing in an air purifier.
Formaldehyde is another common toxin found in pressed wood products, insulation, and certain paints. Long-term exposure can lead to chronic respiratory problems and has been linked to cancer.
Radon gas, another possible carcinogen, is prevalent in the DMV. Your home inspector can do a radon test or there are DIY kits available at many hardware stores. If levels are above EPA standards, a professional remediation firm can install a system that extracts the radon and vents it safely outdoors.
Carbon monoxide (CO), a colorless, odorless gas, is produced by gas stoves, heaters, and fireplaces. Exposure can lead to headaches, dizziness, nausea, and even death. Install CO detectors near bedrooms and ensure that all fuel-burning appliances are properly maintained and ventilated.
Additionally, older homes may still contain asbestos in insulation, floor tiles, or roofing materials. If disturbed, asbestos fibers can become airborne and are highly dangerous when inhaled, leading to serious diseases such as mesothelioma, so when renovating an older home, it’s critical to have materials tested for asbestos before beginning work.
Mold and mildew thrive in damp, poorly ventilated areas such as bathrooms, basements, and around leaky pipes. While some molds are harmless, others can cause allergic reactions or respiratory problems and aggravate conditions such as asthma. Black mold (Stachybotrys chartarum) is notorious for producing mycotoxins that may lead to severe health issues.
Signs of mold include musty odors, visible growth on walls or ceilings, and excessive humidity. Preventing mold growth requires controlling moisture levels—using dehumidifiers and vapor barriers, fixing leaks promptly, and ensuring adequate ventilation. Professional mold remediation may be necessary for severe infestations.
Though banned in residential paints in 1978, lead-based paint still exists in millions of older homes. Lead exposure is especially dangerous for children, causing developmental delays, learning difficulties, and behavioral issues. Adults are not immune – lead can lead to high blood pressure, kidney damage, and reproductive problems.
Even dust from deteriorating lead-based paint can be hazardous. The EPA recommends professional lead testing for any home built before 1978, especially if renovations are planned. Certified abatement professionals can safely remove or encapsulate lead paint.
Improper use of heating equipment, fireplaces, unattended candles, and cooking accidents are common sources of home fires. Smoke alarms and fire extinguishers are essential for early detection and response. Test smoke detectors monthly and change batteries at least once a year.
Homes that are safe for adults may not be safe for children or pets. Small objects, unsecured cabinets, toxic plants, and open staircases can pose significant risks. Childproofing measures such as outlet covers, safety gates, and cabinet locks, along with safe storage of chemicals and medications, are essential precautions.
The good news is that many of these risks can be mitigated with awareness and action. Here are a few simple steps to enhance home safety:
• Conduct a thorough safety audit using checklists available online.
• Ensure proper ventilation to reduce indoor air pollutants.
• Regularly check for leaks and signs of water damage.
• Keep cleaning and chemical products out of reach of children.
• Educate all household members about emergency procedures, including fire escapes and first aid.
Our homes should protect us, not pose threats to our well-being. By identifying and addressing these toxic and unsafe issues, we can transform our living spaces into truly safe havens.
Valerie M. Blake is a licensed Associate Broker in D.C., Maryland, and Virginia with RLAH @properties. Call or text her at 202-246-8602, email her via DCHomeQuest.com, or follow her on Facebook at TheRealst8ofAffairs.
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