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Businessman, philanthropist Bob Alfandre dies at 86
‘A very generous, passionate advocate for the AIDS cause’
Robert “Bob” Alfondre, pictured here with Dionne Warwick at a Whitman-Walker event in 1988, was a prominent D.C.-area homebuilder and donor to AIDS-related causes. (Washington Blade archive photo by Doug Hinckle)
Robert “Bob” Alfandre, a prominent D.C.-area homebuilder and philanthropist who contributed to LGBT rights and AIDS-related causes, died June 12 in his home in Washington following a long battle with cancer. He was 87.
Alfandre is credited with working in collaboration with his brother to transform a modest construction company they inherited from their father into a major homebuilding enterprise.
During the post-World War II economic boom, his Aldre Construction Company built thousands of single-family homes and apartments in the Washington suburbs, according to biographical information from his family and from the Rainbow History Project, a D.C. LGBT group that interviewed Alfandre in 2012.
“Bob used his wealth to become a major philanthropist for the LGBT community,” the Rainbow History Project says in its 2012 write-up of Alfandre’s contribution to LGBT and AIDS-related causes.
Biographical information from his family released through the Joseph Gawler funeral home in Northwest Washington, where a visitation will be held Friday, June 20, says Alfandre’s philanthropic endeavors included generous support for D.C.’s Whitman-Walker Clinic during the peak of the AIDS epidemic in the 1980s and early 1990s.
He also supported the National Trust for Historic Preservation, was an active member of the French Heritage Society, the Cosmos Club, and the Washington Club, and was a Knight of the American Order of St. John, information released from the family says.
D.C. Council member Jim Graham (D-Ward 1), who served as executive director of Whitman-Walker Clinic in the 1980s and early 1990s, said Alfandre became an active supporter of the clinic following the death of his partner, Carroll Sledz, to AIDS in the early 1980s.
“He was a very substantial contributor and a great source of support for me and others in the early years,” Graham said. “You couldn’t overstate the significance of what he did.”
The Rainbow History Project’s biography of Alfandre says he was born in Brooklyn, N.Y., and moved to Washington, D.C. with his family in 1935 at the age of 8. He attended Anacostia High School, served in World War II, and graduated from Swarthmore College with financial help from the G.I. Bill, the Rainbow History Project bio says.
It says Alfandre worked briefly for the CIA after finishing college.
“He left the spy agency during the early days of the McCarthyite witch hunts, convinced that his life as a gay man would make career advancement impossible,” the Rainbow History Project bio says. “Instead he focused on the modest construction company he inherited from his father, Joe Alfandre. With his brother, he became a major participant in D.C.’s postwar economic boom.”
The Rainbow History Project bio, which is based on interviews with Alfandre, says Alfandre – like many gay men of his generation – married a woman and had a family, raising two daughters, one of whom runs the family business. When he met Carroll Sledz and the two fell in love, he and his wife divorced but remained friends, the bio says. It says that in recent years he and his former wife, Priscilla Alfandre, remarried.
Rev. Jerry Anderson, an Episcopal priest, said he met Alfandre in the 1980s through All Souls Memorial Episcopal Church in D.C., where Alfandre was a parishioner and Anderson served as director of the D.C. group Episcopal Caring Response to AIDS. He said he and Alfandre became friends and kept in touch after Anderson moved to Miami and later to Los Angeles.
“He was a wonderful human being,” said Anderson. “He was one of those gay men who responded immediately and wholeheartedly to the AIDS epidemic. He was a very generous, passionate advocate for the AIDS cause.”
Anderson and Rev. John Beddington, current pastor of All Souls Episcopal Church, said Alfandre had a wry sense of humor and became admired for lifting up the spirits of his friends and associates, including people with AIDS.
Anderson said Alfandre often hosted fundraisers and social gatherings at his home in D.C.’s Kalarama section and often invited AIDS patients. He said he has especially fond memories of a party Alfandre hosted for residents of the Carroll Sledz House, a Whitman-Walker facility that Alfandre initiated and funded in honor of his late partner.
“In spite of the fact that it was an AIDS party, everyone was having a great time,” said Anderson. “And Bob was at the center of the party. He always made life fun.”
Added Anderson: “I have two memories or two associations for Bob. One is he took the epidemic very seriously and got seriously engaged and was very generous as a contributor to the cause. But he also wanted us to have fun in spite of it all. Those are the two images of Bob Alfandre that I have.”
Alfandre is survived by his wife, Priscilla; daughters Dominique Palmer and Nicole Alfandre Halbreiner; four grandchildren; his brother Jack Alfandre; and many nieces, nephews, grandnieces and grandnephews and many friends.
A visitation was scheduled for Friday, June 20, from 6-8 p.m. at Joseph Gawler’s, 5130 Wisconsin Ave., N.W.
A funeral service was scheduled for Saturday, June 21, at 11 a.m., at All Souls Episcopal Church, 2300 Cathedral Ave., N.W., Washington, D.C.
Milton, Del., will host its Pride Fest this Saturday with the theme “Small Town, Big Heart.” The town’s population of just over 3,000 is in its sixth year hosting Pride.
The event is hosted by Sussex Pride and Milton Theatre and will take place from 4-8 p.m. in the area surrounding the theater. Admission is pay-what-you-can and proceeds will support the Milton Theatre’s education wing campaign, an initiative dedicated to expanding arts education and creating spaces for the next generation of performers and artists.
The musical act schedule includes Goldstar at 4 p.m., Magnolia Applebottom and Friends at 5:30 p.m., and Mama’s Blacksheep at 6:45 p.m. There will be vendors, food trucks, and a Kids Fest with an inflatable obstacle course.
“In our little corner of the world, LOVE leads the way! Milton Pride 2025 is a celebration for EVERYONE — neighbors, families, allies, and friends — because acceptance, kindness, and community belong to us all,” Milton Theatre’s website reads. “Whether you’re here to cheer, learn, or simply feel the joy … you’re welcome exactly as you are. Let’s come together and celebrate Milton, a SMALL TOWN … with a BIG HEART!”
District of Columbia
Drive with Pride in D.C.
A new Pride-themed license plate is now available in the District, with proceeds directly benefiting local LGBTQ organizations.
Just in time for Pride month, the D.C. Department of Motor Vehicles has partnered with the Mayor’s Office of LGBTQ Affairs to create a special “Pride Lives Here” license plate.
The plate, which was initially unveiled in February, has a one-time $25 application fee and a $20 annual display fee. Both fees will go directly to the Office of Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender and Questioning Affairs Fund.
The MOLGBTQA Fund provides $1,000,000 annually to 25,000 residents through its grant program, funding a slew of LGBTQ organizations in the DMV area — including Capital Pride Alliance, Whitman-Walker, the D.C. Center for the LGBTQ Community, and the Washington Blade Foundation.
The license plate features an inclusive rainbow flag wrapping around the license numbers, with silver stars in the background — a tribute to both D.C.’s robust queer community and the resilience the LGBTQ community has shown.
The “Pride Lives Here” plate is one of only 13 specialty plates offered in the District, and the only one whose fees go directly to the LGBTQ community.
To apply for a Pride plate, visit the DC DMV’s website at https://dmv.dc.gov/
The nation’s capital welcomed WorldPride this past weekend, a massive celebration that usually takes place in a different city every two years.
The Saturday parade attracted hundreds of thousands of people from around the world and the country. The state of Delaware, a few hours drive from D.C., saw participants in the parade, with CAMP Rehoboth, an LGBTQ community center in Rehoboth Beach, hosting a bus day trip.
Hope Vella sits on the board of directors and marched with CAMP Rehoboth. Vella said that although the parade took a long time to start and the temperature was hot, she was “on a cloud” from being there.
“It didn’t matter to me how long it took to start. With the current changes that are in place regarding diversity and inclusion, I wanted my face there,” Vella said. “My life is an intersection. I am a Black woman. I am a lesbian, and I have a disability. All of these things are trying to be erased … I didn’t care how long it took. I didn’t care how far it was going to be. I was going to finish that parade. I didn’t care how hot it was.”
The nearly two mile parade route didn’t feel as long because everyone was so happy interacting with the crowd, Vella said. The group gave out beads, buttons, and pins to parade watchers.
“The World Pride celebration gave me hope because so many people came out. And the joy and the love that was between us … That gave me hope,” Vella said.
Vella said that people with disabilities are often overlooked. More than one in four Americans have disabilities, according to the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.
Vella said it was important for her “to be out there and to be seen in my wholeness as a Black woman, as a lesbian, as a woman with a disability and to not be hiding. I want our society to understand that we exist in LGBTQ+ spaces also.”
Retired Maj. Gen. Tammy Smith is involved with CAMP Rehoboth and marched with a coalition of LGBTQ military members. Smith said they were walking to give transgender military members visibility and to remind people why they are serving.
“When we are not visible, what is allowed to take our place is stereotypes,” Smith said. “And so without visibility, people think all veterans are conservative and perhaps not open to full equality. Without visibility, they might think a small state with a farming background may be a place that’s unwelcoming, but when you actually meet the people who are from those places, it sets aside those stereotypes and the real authenticity is allowed to come forward.”
During the parade, Smith said she saw trans military members in the parade make eye contact or fist bump with transgender people in the crowd.
“They were seen. Both sides were seen during that parade and I just felt privileged to be able to witness that,” Smith said.
Smith said Delaware is a state that is about freedom and equality and is the first state for a reason. The LGBTQ community is engrained as part of life in the Rehoboth and Lewes areas.
“What pride means to me is that we must always be doing what is necessary to maintain our dignity as a community,” Smith said. “We can’t let what people with negative messaging might be tossing our way impact us and the celebration of Pride. I don’t see it as being self-promoting. I see it as an act of dignity and strength.”
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