Arts & Entertainment
Local gay coaches find support from students, parents
‘Building trust holds the relationship together’

Brendan Roddy began coaching swimming at age 14 and currently coaches at an area high school. (Washington Blade photo by Kevin Majoros)
With the LGBT sports movement receiving more national media attention over the past several years, there have been multiple headlines about coaches coming out as gay to their teams. Some of the names that have made the news are high school basketball coach Anthony Nicodemo in Philadelphia and high school track coach Micah Porter of Denver.
In the D.C. metro area, there are a number of LGBT coaches who have been instructing straight athletes for years, even decades. When asked what the obstacles have been for them, the answers offer some surprises.
The relationship between a coach and an athlete is a special one and often the coach becomes a surrogate parent to the athlete and a good friend to the athlete’s family. The announcements of the above mentioned coaches certainly prompted many to wonder if the relationship between a coach and an athlete is different if a gay coach is instructing a group of straight athletes.
Brendan Roddy began swimming competitively at age 11 and continued to do so through college at Salisbury State University. As a 14-year-old he became a junior swim coach for Rockville Montgomery Swim Club and then coached at Salisbury State University during grad school.
After returning to the area as a teacher at Churchill High School, Roddy realized he missed coaching and became the swimming and diving coach at the high school.
“Parents that are ‘with it’ caught on quickly that I was gay,” says Roddy. “The others figured it out eventually. The kids would generally test the waters with pronouns when asking about my personal life. If they asked directly, I would tell them.”
Roddy says that his sexual orientation rarely comes up in conversations with his athletes or their parents and it has never stood in the way of his coaching.
“Building a level of trust and respect is what holds the athlete/coach relationship together,” says Roddy. “It is amazing how much kids have evolved over the past decade. The smiles on their faces are what keeps me in it.”
Jeff Nolt began his figure skating career in New York and as it progressed, trained in Pennsylvania and Delaware. In the early 1980s, he qualified for nationals as a pairs team with his sister Susan. Following their retirement from competitive skating, they performed in the Ice Capades for two years.
Nolt started coaching in Syracuse and eventually his work brought him to the Baltimore/Washington area. His students range in age from six to 60.
“The parents of my students trust who I am and there is no fear of me being gay,” Nolt says. “The bottom line is that I get paid to teach people how to skate choreographically and technically correct. Kids can smell you a mile away; if you are unprepared and have doubts about yourself, the respect and trust will never come.”
He adds, “I like being a mentor. It is exciting to know that I can have an impact on someone’s life and it is important for me to give back what I have learned.”
Sami Holtz grew up in Montgomery County and began competing in soccer and swimming at age eight. She eventually changed over to softball and took on rugby during her college years at Johnson and Wales and Springfield College. She also played full-contact football in the Independent Women’s Football League.
She began coaching swimming in New England, which led to a coaching position in the Montgomery County Swim League in 2007. She is now coaching swimming at Forest Knolls and the Silver Spring YMCA.
“In the community I work in, nobody cares that I am gay,” says Holtz. “The only discrimination I have encountered was related to my religious beliefs.”
Holtz says that one of her swimmers has two moms and another teenage swimmer recently came out as gay.
“His mother thought it would be nice if we connected at Capital Pride this past June,” Holtz says laughing.
Akil Patterson was a three-sport, all-state athlete during his years at Frederick High School and went on to play football at the University of Maryland. He left the Terps and played two years at California University of Pennsylvania.
He later played for the United Indoor Football League. After an Arena Football tryout his weight ballooned to 380 pounds and he ended up back on the University of Maryland campus where a wrestling coach asked him to work with their heavyweights.
He went on to become a coach with the Terps wrestling program and the Terrapin Wresting Club (TWC). The TWC provides training and competitive opportunities for the wrestling community and for post-collegiate wrestlers who have international aspirations. They are an official Regional Olympic Training Center of USA Wrestling.
Patterson coaches athletes who range in age from 13 to 22 and says that his sexual orientation is also a non-issue.
“I know that some people trash talk me behind my back for being gay, but I am not ashamed and I am not shy,” says Patterson. “Anyone that knows me knows that I am all about the athletes. I love my kids.”
Patterson has developed trusting and respectful relationships with his athletes and their families over the years. He has been asked by parents to step in when their children are not doing well in school.
“I have an athlete whose father is with the U.S. Marshals and he volunteered to speak at diversity training for the Marshals,” says Patterson. “When he stepped up to the microphone he simply stated; my son loves his coach and my son looks up to his coach.”
Patterson adds, “I believe that one’s sexuality transcends sports.”
The LGBTQ+ Victory Fund National Champagne Brunch was held at Salamander Washington DC on Sunday, April 19. Gov. Andy Beshear (D-Ky.) was presented with the Allyship Award.
(Washington Blade photos by Michael Key)



















The umbrella LGBTQ sports organization Team D.C. held its annual Night of Champions Gala at the Georgetown Marriott on Saturday, April 18. Team D.C. presented scholarships to local student athletes and presented awards to Adam Peck, Manuel Montelongo (a.k.a. Mari Con Carne), Dr. Sara Varghai and the Centaur Motorcycle Club. Sean Bartel was posthumously honored with the Most Valuable Person Award.
(Washington Blade photos by Michael Key)















Television
‘Big Mistakes’ an uneven – but worthy – comedic showcase
In the years since “Schitt’s Creek” wrapped up its six season Emmy-winning run, nostalgia for it has grown deep – especially since the still painfully recent loss of its iconic leading lady, Catherine O’Hara, whose sudden passing prompted a social media wave of clips and tributes featuring her fan-favorite performance as the deliciously daft Moira Rose. Revisiting so many favorite scenes and funny moments from the show naturally reminded us of just how much we loved it, even needed it during the time it was on the air; it also reminded us of how much we miss it, and how much it feels now like something we need more than ever.
That, perhaps more than anything else, is why the arrival of “Big Mistakes” – the new Netflix series starring, co-created and co-written by Dan Levy – felt so welcome. We knew it wouldn’t be the Roses, but it seemed cut from the same cloth, and it had David Rose (or at least someone who seemed a lot like him) in the middle of a comically dysfunctional family dynamic, complete with a mother who gets involved in town politics and a catty sibling rivalry with his sister, and still nebbish-ly uncomfortable in his own gay shoes. Only this time, instead of running a pastor of the local church, and instead of a collection of kooky small town neighbors to contend with, there are gangsters.
As it turns out, it really does feel cut from the same cloth, but the design is distinctly different. Set in a fictional New Jersey suburb, it centers on Nicky (Levy) and his sister Morgan (Taylor Ortega) – he openly gay with an adoring boyfriend (Jacob Gutierrez), yet still obsessive about keeping it all invisible to his congregation, and she drudging aimlessly through life as an underpaid schoolteacher after failing to achieve her New York dreams of show biz success – who inadvertently become enmeshed in a shady underworld when a gesture for their dead grandmother’s funeral goes horribly awry.
They’re surrounded by a crew of equally compromised characters. There’s their mother Linda (Laurie Metcalf), whose campaign to become the town’s mayor only intensifies her tendency to micromanage her children’s lives; Yusuf (Boran Kuzum), the Turkish-American mini-mart operator who pulls them into the criminal conspiracy yet is himself a victim of it; Max (Jack Innanen), Morgan’s live-in boyfriend, who pushes her for a deeper commitment and is willing to go to couples’ therapy to prove it; Annette, his mother (Elizabeth Perkins), who lends her society standing toward helping Linda’s campaign against a misogynistic opponent (Darren Goldstein); and Ivan (Mark Ivanir), the seemingly ruthless crime boss who enslaves the siblings into his network but may really be just another slave in it himself. It’s a well-fleshed out assortment of characters that helps our own loyalties shift and adapt, generating at least a degree of empathy – if not always sympathy – that keeps everyone from coming off as a merely “black-and-white” caricature of expectations and typecasting.
To be sure, it’s an entertaining binge-watch, full of distinctive characters – all inhabiting familiar, even stereotypical roles in the narrative – who are each given a degree of validation, both in writing and performance, as the show unspools its narrative. At the same time, it makes for a fairly bleak overall view of humanity, in which it’s difficult to place our loyalties with anyone without also embracing a kind of “dog eat dog” morality in which nobody is truly innocent – but nobody is completely to blame for their sins, anyway.
In this way, it’s a show that lets us off the hook in the sense that it places the idea of ethical guilt within a framework of relative evils as it permits us to forgive our own trespasses through our acceptance of its lovably amoral – when it comes right down to it – characters, each of whom has their own reasons and justifications for what they do. We relate, but we can’t quite shake the notion that, if all these people hadn’t been so caught up in their own personal dramas, none of them would have ended up in the compromised morality that they do, and that they are all therefore, at some level, to blame for whatever consequences they endure.
However, it’s not some bleak morality play that Levy and crew undertake; rather, it’s more an egalitarian fantasy in which even “bad” choices feel justified by inevitability. Everybody has their reasons for doing what they do, and most of those reasons make enough sense to us that it’s hard to judge any of the characters for making the choices – however unwise – that they do. In a system where everyone is forced to compromise themselves in order to achieve whatever dream of self-fulfillment they may have, how can anybody really blame themselves for doing what they have to do to survive?
Of course, all things considered, this is more a relatable comedy than it is a morality play, and it is, perhaps, taking things a bit too seriously to go that “deep.” As a comedy of errors, it all works well enough on its own without imposing an ideology on it, no matter how much we may be tempted to do so. Indeed, what is ultimately more to the point is how well this pseudo-cynical exercise in the normalization of corruption – for that is what it really about, in the end – succeeds in letting us all off the hook for our compromises. In a reality in which we can only respond to corruption by finding the ethical validation for making the choice to survive, how can we judge ourselves – or anyone else – for doing whatever is necessary?
In the end, of course, maybe all that analysis is too deep a dive for a show that feels, in the end, so clearly to be focused merely on reminding us of how much necessity dictates our choices –for truly, the fate of all its characters hinges on how well they respond to the compromised decisions that must make along the way. The more important observation, perhaps, has to do with the necessity to make such moral choices along our way – and it comes not from a moralistic urge toward making the “right” choice as much as it does from a candid recognition that all of us are compromised from the outset, and that’s a refreshing enough bit of honesty that we can easily get on board.
It helps that the performances are on point, especially the loony and wide-eyed fanaticism of Metcalf – surely the MVP of any project in which she is involved – and the directly focused moral malleability of Ortega, Levy, of course, is Levy – a now-familiar persona that can exist within any milieu without further justification than its own queer relatability – and, in this case, at least, that’s both the icing on the cake and substance that defines it. That’s enough to make it an essential view for fans, queer or otherwise, of his distinctive “brand,” even if he – or the show itself – doesn’t quite satisfy in the way that “Schitt’s Creek” was able to do.
Seriously, though, how could it?
