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Greener grass and other falsehoods

The perils of living on a septic system

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septic system, gay news, Washington Blade
My water view came at a steep cost when the septic system failed.

The late Erma Bombeck was a nationally syndicated humor columnist writing “At Wits End” beginning in the mid-1960s. In 1976, she wrote a book entitled “The Grass is Always Greener Over the Septic Tank.” It followed a young couple who left the city for what they thought would be an easy life in the suburbs, and the comical problems they faced. This is where my story begins.

In May 2018, I put my beach house, Chez Soleil, on the market. I am under contract by July 25 and during the home inspection, I learn that my septic tank has failed. Now, I’m a city girl with a little bit of the suburbs in me, just like the book, so I have no idea what to do about it. 

Thankfully, my colleagues, Anh Boesch and Marilyn Emery, tell me about the Chesapeake Bay Restoration Fund under the jurisdiction of the Maryland Departments of Health (MDH) and the Environment (MDE). Under certain conditions, they will finance the replacement of my septic system with a grant. 

7/30/18 – I contact MDH and learn that grant money is available. My house is in the critical area and gets first crack at the funds. I submit forms to start the process and they send me a list of 78 local contractors who do septic work.

8/13/18 – By now, eight installers have viewed the premises and declined the job. The lot is too small, the road is too narrow, the retaining wall prohibits use of their excavation equipment. Little things like that.

8/22/18 – Stephen Hayden of Paul Hayden Plumbing agrees to do the job and meets with the sanitarian from MDH. The job will require holding tanks instead of a septic system. MDH says tanks are not covered by the grant. I must remove the retaining wall I built three months earlier. My beautiful deck overlooking the water must come down.

Stephen finds a mason for the retaining wall and verifies that I can get the grant because of the size of my yard (hooray!).  After three false starts, Stephen locates a contractor and asks him to verify that county code will allow the deck to be reinstalled. Contractor doesn’t know but accepts the challenge.

10/25/18 – With both contractors finally hired, MDH sends me a list of requirements to secure the grant. No, I can’t just hire Stephen, who has been working on this with me since August. I need three bids to install the holding tanks, which I can’t get until I received the specifications from MDE.  

11/7/18 – Specifications arrive. Christmas comes and goes before I can get other bidders even remotely interested in the job. Several don’t answer the phone or call me back. One will bid but is unavailable for six months. Another needs permission to bring his equipment across the neighbor’s front yard. Five voicemails to the neighbor yield no results. 

1/3/19 – Happy New Year! I am finally able to submit three bids to MDH, which approves them six days later. I select Stephen Hayden again.

1/25/19 – Construction permit arrives, and I learn that I have been approved for a $20,000 grant, which will pay for about 60 percent of the job. Work must be completed within 45 days. Stephen has four customers ahead of me. Building inspector says we must have a structural engineer approve the deck plans.

3/20/19 – The deck contractor sends plans with the engineer’s approval to me. Steps to the deck are drawn in the wrong place. He says it won’t matter because “everybody just draws plans by hand and permits are fast-tracked on Wednesdays.”  Then he goes on vacation.

3/22/19 – Holding tanks arrive with faulty lids and must be reordered. MDH approves an extension of time for completion of the job. Extraordinarily patient buyers cancel the contract and I pour myself a Scotch and water.

4/22/19 – After two weeks of rain delays the job begins, and tank installation is complete four days later. The mason reinstalls the retaining wall the following week. Where’s the deck guy?

5/6/19 – Mr. Deck sheepishly tells me that we will need a full set of architectural plans drawn after all, and we must run everything by MDE for approval. No fast-tracking for this gal.

5/24/19 – Still waiting. Still drinking. Whatever happens, the next buyer will get a fully renovated, water view cottage, with a new septic system, retaining wall, and deck. 

And I will never buy a house on a septic system again, no matter how much greener the grass is.

Valerie M. Blake is a licensed Associate Broker in D.C., Maryland and Virginia and Director of Education & Mentorship at RLAH Real Estate. Reach her at 202-246-8602, DCHomeQuest.com, or follow her on Facebook at TheRealst8ofAffairs.

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Real Estate

Celebrate the power of homeownership this Fourth of July

Owning a home is powerful act of self-determination

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(Photo by yootin/Bigstock)

This Fourth of July, celebrate more than independence: celebrate the power of LGBTQ+ homeownership. Explore resources, rights, and representation with GayRealEstate.com, the trusted leader in LGBTQ+ real estate for over 30 years.

Home is more than a house: it’s a symbol of freedom

As the fireworks light up the sky this Fourth of July, LGBTQ+ individuals and families across the country are not just celebrating the nation’s independence — they’re celebrating personal milestones of freedom, visibility, and the right to call a place their own.

For many in the LGBTQ+ community, owning a home represents more than stability — it’s a powerful act of self-determination. After generations of discrimination and exclusion from housing opportunities, more LGBTQ+ people are stepping into homeownership with pride and purpose.

Why homeownership matters to the LGBTQ+ community

While progress has been made, LGBTQ+ homebuyers still face unique challenges, including:

  • Housing discrimination, even in states with legal protections
  • Limited access to LGBTQ+ friendly realtors and resources
  • Concerns about safety and acceptance in new neighborhoods
  • Lack of representation in the real estate industry

That’s why the Fourth of July is a perfect time to reflect not just on freedom as a concept, but on how that freedom is expressed in the real world — through ownership, safety, and pride in where and how we live.

Finding LGBTQ+ Friendly Neighborhoods

One of the top concerns for LGBTQ+ buyers is whether they’ll feel safe, accepted, and welcome in their new neighborhood. Thanks to evolving attitudes and stronger community support, many cities across the U.S. now offer inclusive, affirming environments.

Some of the best cities for LGBTQ+ home buyers include:

  • Wilton Manors, Fla. – A vibrant LGBTQ+ hub with strong community ties
  • Palm Springs, Calif. – A longtime favorite for LGBTQ+ homeowners
  • Asheville, N.C. – Progressive and artsy, with growing LGBTQ+ visibility
  • Portland, Ore. – Inclusive, eco-conscious, and diverse
  • Philadelphia, PA – Rich in history and LGBTQ+ community leadership

When you work with an LGBTQ+ friendly realtor, you get insight into more than property values — you get a real perspective on where you’ll feel most at home.

Navigating the real estate process with confidence

Whether you’re a first-time gay homebuyer or preparing to sell your home as an LGBTQ+ couple, it’s essential to understand your rights and options. Here are a few key tips:

1. Work with a trusted LGBTQ+ real estate agent

Representation matters. A gay realtor, lesbian real estate agent, or LGBTQ+ friendly agent understands the unique concerns you may face and advocates for you every step of the way.

Use GayRealEstate.com to connect with LGBTQ+ real estate agents near you. For over 30 years, we’ve helped LGBTQ+ buyers and sellers find their ideal home and a professional who respects their identity.

2. Know your legal protections

While federal law (via the Fair Housing Act and Supreme Court rulings) prohibits housing discrimination based on sexual orientation or gender identity, enforcement can vary by state. Make sure to research:

  • State-level housing discrimination laws
  • Local LGBTQ+ protections and resources
  • What to do if you experience discrimination during a transaction

3. Secure inclusive financing

While most lenders follow fair lending rules, it’s smart to seek out banks or credit unions with LGBTQ+ inclusive policies and a history of non-discriminatory lending practices.

4. Plan for the future as a family

For same-sex couples, especially unmarried partners, it’s vital to review how you’ll hold the title, designate beneficiaries, and plan your estate.

Ask your agent or attorney about:

  • Joint tenancy with right of survivorship
  • Living trusts
  • Powers of attorney and healthcare proxies

Selling a home as an LGBTQ+ homeowner

If you’re listing your home, working with a gay-friendly real estate agent ensures your identity and story are honored — not hidden — in the process.

Highlight:

  • Your community connections
  • Your home’s role in creating a safe space
  • Local LGBTQ+ resources to attract like-minded buyers

Showcasing the full value of your home includes sharing what it meant to live there authentically and safely.

Your home, your freedom

The Fourth of July reminds us that freedom isn’t just an abstract idea — it’s lived every day in the spaces where we find comfort, love, and belonging. For the LGBTQ+ community, the right to own and thrive in a home is part of the larger journey toward full equality.

At GayRealEstate.com, we believe every LGBTQ+ person deserves:

  • A safe place to live
  • A community that welcomes them
  • An advocate in the home buying or selling process

Ready to make a move?

Whether you’re dreaming of your first home, upgrading with your partner, or selling a space that helped shape your identity, GayRealEstate.com is your trusted partner. With our nationwide network of gay realtors, lesbian real estate agents, and LGBTQ+ friendly professionals, we make your journey smooth, respectful, and informed.

Visit GayRealEstate.com to:

  • Search LGBTQ+ friendly homes
  • Connect with inclusive real estate agents
  • Access free guides for buyers and sellers
  • Protect your rights and get expert advice

This Fourth of July, celebrate more than independence — celebrate your freedom to live, love, and own with pride.

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Real Estate

How to keep cool during a heat wave

Close blinds, use ceiling fans, and more tips

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It’s hot! Here are some ways to keep cool in a heatwave. (Photo by sonyworld/Bigstock)

Did you melt like the Wicked Witch of the West this week?

As summer temperatures rise, keeping your home or apartment cool during a heat wave can become both a comfort issue and a financial challenge. One of the most effective ways to keep a home cool is to prevent heat from entering in the first place. Sunlight streaming through windows can significantly raise indoor temperatures. Consider the following solutions:

• Close blinds or curtains during the hottest parts of the day. Blackout curtains or thermal drapes can reduce heat gain by up to 30%.

• Install reflective window films to block UV rays and reduce solar heat without sacrificing natural light.

• Use outdoor shading solutions such as awnings (yes, the ones you removed because they were “dated”) and shutters to limit direct sunlight.

Fans are a cost-effective way to circulate air and create a wind-chill effect that makes rooms feel cooler.

• Ceiling fans should rotate counterclockwise in the summer to push cool air down.

• Box fans or oscillating fans can be placed near windows to pull in cooler evening air or push hot air out.

• Create a cross-breeze by opening windows on opposite sides of your home and positioning fans to direct airflow through the space.

• For an extra cooling effect, place a bowl of ice or a frozen water bottle in front of a fan to circulate chilled air.

To optimize natural ventilation, open windows early in the morning or late in the evening when outdoor temperatures drop. This allows cooler air to flow in and helps ventilate heat that built up during the day. 

Appliances and electronics generate a surprising amount of heat. To reduce indoor temperatures:

• Avoid using the oven or stove during the day; opt for no-cook meals, microwave cooking, or grilling outside.

• Run heat-producing appliances like dishwashers and clothes dryers in the early morning or late evening.

• Unplug electronics when not in use, as even standby power can add heat to your space.

• Switching to energy-efficient LED lightbulbs can also reduce ambient heat compared to incandescent lighting.

If you do use an air conditioner, maximize its effectiveness by:

• Setting it to a reasonable temperature—around 76–78°F when you’re home and higher when you’re away.

• Cleaning or replacing filters regularly to maintain airflow and efficiency.

• Sealing gaps around doors and windows to prevent cool air from escaping. (Didn’t we all have a parent who said, “Close the door. You’re letting all the cool out?”)

• Using a programmable thermostat to optimize cooling schedules and reduce energy use.

If it is not cost-prohibitive, adding insulation in attics and walls can greatly reduce heat transfer. Solar panels that reflect heat can also help, as well as offset the cost of their installation. Adding weatherstripping around doors and windows, sealing cracks, and using door sweeps can make a significant difference in keeping heat out and cool air in.

Natural and eco-conscious methods can also help cool your home.

• Snake plants, ferns, or rubber trees can improve air quality and slightly cool the air through transpiration.

• White or reflective roof paint can reduce roof temperatures significantly.

• Cooling mats or bedding can make sleeping more comfortable without cranking up the A/C.

For renters or those who can’t make permanent modifications, there are still plenty of ways to keep cool.

• Use portable fans and A/C units instead of built-in systems, making sure they are the correct size for your space.

• Removable window film or static cling tinting can reflect heat without violating your lease.

• Install tension rod curtains or temporary blackout panels instead of hardware-mounted window coverings.

• Add draft blockers and weatherstripping tape that can be applied and removed without damage.

• Cover floors with light-colored rugs to reflect heat rather than absorb it.

• If allowed, use temporary adhesive hooks to hang reflective materials or light-filtering fabrics over windows.

Even if your space is warm, you can still take steps to help your body stay cool.

• Wear light, breathable fabrics like cotton or linen.

• Stay hydrated and avoid caffeine or alcohol during peak heat hours.

• Take cool showers or use damp cloths on your neck and wrists to bring your body temperature down.

Keeping your home or apartment cool in the summer doesn’t have to be expensive or energy-intensive. With a few adjustments such as blocking sunlight, optimizing airflow, using fans effectively, and making renter-friendly upgrades, you can create a more comfortable indoor environment while keeping energy bills in check.


Valerie M. Blake is a licensed Associate Broker in D.C., Maryland, and Virginia with RLAH @properties. Call or text her at 202-246-8602, email her at DCHomeQuest.com, or follow her on Facebook at TheRealst8ofAffairs

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Real Estate

The world’s on fire and D.C. is on sale (sort of)

Prices are up, but then again, nothing makes sense anymore

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The housing market remains strong in D.C., especially in upper Northwest. (Photo by Stbaus7/Bigstock)

ICE is disappearing people, revered government agencies are shuttering, and who knows if we’ll be in World War III next week? But can you believe prices in D.C. are actually still up 6.3% since last year? It doesn’t make sense, and perhaps that does make sense, because nothing seems to make any sense any more.

That said, there are some parts of our market that are truly suffering. The interest rates, which have been up, up, up for about four years now, are the ongoing rain on our market’s military parade. Combine that with 75,000 federal employees taking a buyout nationwide, and DOGE cuts eliminating around 40,000 federal jobs in the District (per estimates by the D.C. CFO), not to mention thousands of other job losses in non-governmental organizations due to funding and program cuts, and you’ve got a case of uncertainty, and downright unaffordability in the pool of otherwise would-be buyers.

This has had a marked impact on properties that starter-home buyers and low- to mid-level employees would otherwise buy, most notably condominium and cooperative apartment units. These properties have already slowed in our market thanks to the profound impact that higher interest rates have had on their monthly carrying costs—pair that with job insecurity, and a lot of condos are proving to be very difficult to sell indeed.

So how is the average sale price up in our market?

The increase is almost entirely due to the resounding strength of the single-family home market, especially in upper Northwest D.C., where it is still quite common to see bidding wars, even on properties pushing past the $3M mark. It seems that buyers in that echelon are less impacted by a few percentage points in the interest rate, and less concerned about their job security. Notably, those buyers are often married with children and have an absolute need for more space, must stay in the area due to one spouse’s job, or the kid’s friend group, regardless of whether the cost of owning is thousands of dollars more per month than it would have been in 2020 or 2021. The continued appreciation in these neighborhoods defies imagination.

So, what to do if you are not one of those lucky enough to be shopping for a $3M home? The short answer: wait. If you want more space, rent your current place out and learn the joys of being a landlord while someone else pays your mortgage. Need the equity from your current home to buy your next place? Get a home equity line of credit, or loan, and pull the equity out of your current place to buy the next one. Or—and I have never recommended this before in 21 years of being a Realtor—rent for a few years. Sure, I’d love to list and sell your condo so you can climb the real estate ladder, but it might just be a waste of time, money or both if you could just ride out this storm and sell in a DOGE-less future.

All this said, there are some condos that seem to be immune from this recent negative news. Anecdotally, it feels like it’s the truly special ones that do just fine no matter the market. Our recent listing in Capitol Hill had a view from every one of its 15 windows of the Supreme Court. Sold in five days with six offers. Another condo was on the top two floors of a townhouse and had the coolest black wood floors that gleamed like a grand piano. Sold in four days at full price.

So, all is not for naught if you have a condo or home in an area that people want to be in, with nice space, light, amenities and a certain je ne sais quois. And, as long as we have a democracy in a few years, my experience says our market will be back, stronger than ever, really soon.


David Bediz is a Realtor and mortgage loan broker for the Bediz Group LLC and Home Starts Here, LLC. Reach him at [email protected].

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