August 21, 2019 at 4:51 pm EDT | by Mariah Cooper
Colton Haynes opens up about addiction, shares throwback hospital photos
Colton Haynes. (Photo via Instagram)

Colton Haynes opened up about his pill addiction with a series of throwback photos including some pictures of the “Arrow” star in the hospital.

“Throwback. I don’t want worrying about if I look hot or not on Instagram to be my legacy,” Haynes captioned the photos. “I don’t want to skirt around the truth to please other people or to gain economic success. I have far more important things to say than what magazine I just shot for or what tv show I’m a part of (Although I’m very thankful I still get to do what I love). I no longer want to project a curated life.”

He continued: “I get immense joy when someone comes up to me & says that my willingness to open up about depression, anxiety, alcoholism, & addiction has helped them in some way. I’ve struggled the past year with trying to find my voice and where I fit in & that has been the most beautiful struggle I’ve ever had to go through. Worrying about what time to post on social media so I can maximize my likes or being mad at myself that I don’t look the same way I did when I was addicted to pills is a complete waste of why I was put on this earth.”

Haynes has been candid about his struggles with addiction and anxiety in the past. In a May interview with Attitude, Haynes says his public divorce from florist Jeff Leatham and the death of his mother contributed to his “downward spiral.”

“I came out and, in a way, my downward spiral started,” Haynes told Attitude. “I felt extremely free but at the same time the amount of attention I was getting was making me spin out of control. I got married and that didn’t work out. That was extremely public and heart-breaking, and right when that was going on, my mom died. That was only a year ago.”

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Throwback. I don’t want worrying about if I look hot or not on Instagram to be my legacy. I don’t want to skirt around the truth to please other people or to gain economic success. I have far more important things to say than what magazine I just shot for or what tv show I’m a part of (Although I’m very thankful I still get to do what I love). I no longer want to project a curated life. I get immense joy when someone comes up to me & says that my willingness to open up about depression, anxiety, alcoholism, & addiction has helped them in some way. I’ve struggled the past year with trying to find my voice and where I fit in & that has been the most beautiful struggle I’ve ever had to go through. Worrying about what time to post on social media so I can maximize my likes or being mad at myself that I don’t look the same way I did when I was addicted to pills is a complete waste of why I was put on this earth. I’m posting these photos to let y’all in on my truth. I’m so grateful to be where I am now ( a year after these photos were taken) but man these times were dark. I’m a human being with flaws just like you. If ur in the middle of the dark times…I promise you it doesn’t have to last forever. Love y’all ❤️

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