Arts & Entertainment

Canadian Olympic swimmer comes out in online essay

Published

6 years ago

February 20, 2020

*Olympian **Markus Thormeyer** says “It’s OK to be gay” (Image via Instagram)*

An Olympic athlete has come out as gay in an emotional online essay.

Canadian swimmer Markus Thormeyer, who competed in the 4 x 100 freestyle relay team in the 2016 Olympics, posted his coming out story on the website OutSports Wednesday, beginning his narrative by revealing that “the secret I was keeping” was “holding me back” when he began training with his team in Vancouver in 2015.

“Creating these intimate bonds with my teammates was amazing, but it also made me feel guilty at the same time.” the 22-year-old athlete writes. “They were exposing their most raw essence in the pool every day, but I would come to the pool emotionally guarded and not do the same. Following every interaction with my teammates, I would feel a bit sad because they weren’t getting to know the real me, just some surface-level shell I fabricated.”

He goes on to explain, “I wanted to keep it a secret that I was gay for multiple reasons. I was scared they wouldn’t accept me. I did not want to create drama in the training group, I didn’t know how they would react. I was scared of negative responses.”

He also says that he feared his sexuality would “compromise” the team’s chances of making the Olympics. “I didn’t want to take that chance, so I kept my walls up and generally avoided talks about sexuality and dating,” he says.

At first, the swimmer says, he “thought it would be easy” to hide his secret, but “the following months in the closet” were much more difficult than he imagined, and got “progressively harder every day.”

“Some days I dreaded going to the pool in fear that my sexuality would be exposed,” Thormeyer writes. “I’d show up late and leave early to social gatherings and workouts. Some days it would even spiral and I would question why I was swimming and be scared of my own goals.

“Having to deal with that was awful. Every day felt like a threat and not an opportunity.”

In the end, the pressure of keeping his secret led to an emotional breakdown.

“I felt helpless on my bedroom floor, but I also knew that I couldn’t keep living like this,” he reveals. “At this point I knew that I would either burn out and or take control of my destiny. I decided to take control (…) and come out to my teammates. I always wanted them to know I was gay, but now I was ready for them to know.”

Because he is “not a dramatic person,” he says, the swimmer decided to slip the revelation casually into a conversation that came up with his teammates about relationships.

“I casually said that I had never been on a date with a guy before and I was kind of scared of it. That I’d probably be a nervous wreck and ruin it.

“Then, without a sliver of judgment or skipping a beat, my friends told me that I’d probably be fine on a date as long as I just had a good time and just was comfortable being myself.”

The instant acceptance and support changed everything for the Olympic then-hopeful.

“Knowing that I had such amazing teammates supporting me so strongly regardless of my sexual orientation was one of the best feelings in the world,” he says. “There was no drama and it was exactly what I wanted.”

“Feeling safe in my training environment and having no distractions allowed me to push myself to new limits in the pool,” he goes on to add. “My training got better, I got stronger and my technique got sharper. Not only that, but I also broke down some walls between me and my teammates and our relationships flourished. Training with them fostered relationships that will last a lifetime.”

After coming out to his fellow competitors, the swimmer and 6 of his teammates went on to qualify for the 2016 Summer Olympics. Thormeyer himself has enjoyed continued success, winning the gold in the 200-meter backstroke and bronze in the 100-meter backstroke in the FINA Champions Swim Series in China. He plans to join the Olympic trials this Spring in order to qualify for this year’s Summer Olympics in Tokyo Olympics.

He concludes his inspiring story by announcing his decision to join Team Canada’s OneTeam, an organization which promotes LGBTQ inclusion and respect in schools and sport throughout the country.

“I want to share my story and be able to spread the message that it’s OK to be gay. Life is much better when you fully embrace you for who you are.”

Up Next

‘HUMP!’ Fest offers porn by the people, for the people

Don't Miss

Marvel actor reveals ‘The Eternals’ will feature married gay superhero

FUND LGBTQ JOURNALISM

Photos

PHOTOS: ‘Studio 69’

Glitterati Productions hold party at Bunker

Published

17 hours ago

May 11, 2026

Michael Key

'Studio 69' was held at Bunker on Friday. (Washington Blade photo by Michael Key)

Glitterati Productions held the “Studio 69” party at Bunker on Friday, May 8.

(Washington Blade photos by Michael Key)

Arts & Entertainment

Washington Blade’s Pride on the Pier returns June 13 to kick off D.C. Pride week

Pride on the Pier officially launches Pride Week in D.C.

Published

23 hours ago

May 11, 2026

Staff reports

The Washington Blade’s annual Pride on the Pier celebration returns to The Wharf on Saturday, June 13, 2026 from 4-9 p.m., bringing thousands of LGBTQ community members and allies together for an unforgettable waterfront celebration to kick off Pride week in Washington, D.C.

Now in its eighth year, Washington Blade Pride on the Pier extends the city’s annual celebration of LGBTQ visibility to the bustling Wharf waterfront with an exciting array of activities and entertainment for all ages. The District Pier will offer DJs, dancing, drag, and other entertainment. Alcoholic beverages will be available for purchase for those 21 and older.

“Pride on the Pier has become one of the signature moments of Pride in D.C.,” said Lynne Brown, publisher of the Washington Blade. “There’s nothing like watching our community come together on the waterfront with live music and incredible energy as we kick off Pride week.”

Pride on the Pier is free and open to the public, with VIP tickets available for exclusive pier access to the Dockmaster Building. To purchase VIP tickets visit www.prideonthepierdc.com/vip.

Additional entertainment announcements, sponsor activations, and event details will be released in the coming weeks.

Event Details:

📍 Location: District Pier at The Wharf (101 District Sq SW, Washington, DC)
📅 Dates: Friday, 13, 2026

⏱️ 4-9PM
🎟️ VIP Tickets: www.PrideOnThePierDC.com/VIP

Theater

National tour of ‘Gatsby’ comes to National Theatre

Out actor Edward Staudenmayer talks playing the show’s gangster

Published

2 days ago

May 10, 2026

Patrick Folliard

Edward Staudenmayer plays Meyer Wolfsheim in ‘The Great Gatsby.’ (Photo courtesy National Theatre)

‘The Great Gatsby’
May 12-24
The National Theatre
1321 Pennsylvania Ave., N.W.
$59-$196
Thenationaldc.com

Often dubbed “The Great American Novel” for its depiction of ambition and self-invention alongside the reversals of success, F. Scott Fitzgerald’s “The Great Gatsby” says it all in a fast read.

Set against the excesses and energy of the Roaring Twenties, “The Great Gatsby,” novel and now the same-titled hit Broadway musical with a jazz/pop original score by Jason Howland and Nathan Tysen, tells the story of Nick Carraway and his friendship with Jay Gatsby, an enigmatic millionaire intent on reuniting with ex-lover, Daisy Buchanan.

It was during a four-month 2025 run in Seoul, South Korea, that out actor Edward Staudenmayer first played the show’s heavy, Meyer Wolfsheim, a gangster who helped Gatsby make his murkily acquired fortune. As Meyer, Staudenmayer opens the second act with, appropriately enough, “Shady.”

Now three months into a year-long North American tour, the show is poised to enjoy a brief run at Washington’s National Theatre (5/12-5/24).

While putting on his eyeliner prior to a recent Wednesday matinee at Chicago’s Cadillac Palace Theatre, the upstate New York-based actor shared about Gatsby and a life in theater.

WASHINGTON BLADE: Despite your good looks and terrific voice, you’re rarely the leading the man. How is that?

EDWARD STAUDENMAYER: I’m definitely a character man. I’ve been painting lines on my face to play old men since I was in high school. I was the youngest freshman in college playing old Uncle Sorin [in Chekhov’s “The Seagull”].

There have been many villains. Some darker than others. Meyer Wolfsheim is a very bad guy, but he doesn’t haunt me once I’m offstage. I play a lot of pickleball.

BLADE: Is it true that like so many of Fitzgerald’s characters, Wolfsheim is famously based on someone the writer encountered in life.

STAUDENMEYER: That’s true, Wolfsheim is pretty much a direct portrayal of real-life mobster and 1919 World Series fixer [Arnold Rothstein].

BLADE: When did the 1925 novel first surface on your radar?

STAUDENMAYER: Like many of us, I was assigned “The Great Gatsby” in high school. It was short, and filled with sex and illicit activities. I thought it was great. Definitely wasn’t a Judy Blume novel.

Interestingly, the book wasn’t originally a huge a success for Fitzgerald, but because it was about war and having the girl at home, they gave it to GIs leaving for WWII. After returning, a lot of those guys went on the GI Bill and became English teachers. They assigned the book to their students.

BLADE The idea that the book’s first-person narrator, Nick Carraway, is gay and enamored with Jay Gatsby is long discussed among readers and scholars. Does the musical touch on that?

STAUDENMAYER: Yes, there’s conjecture about Jay and Nick, and it’s implied in our show. It’s also implied about Jordan Baker, Jay’s fleeting romantic interest. Ultimately, she’s a confirmed bachelor, and a professional golfer who only wears pants.

Our performers are really good. Josh Grasso who plays Nick is fantastic. I’ve had to stop watching him in his last scene; it’s not good for Meyer Wolfsheim to take his curtain call crying. Our Gatsby, Jake David Smith, is good too. He’s gorgeous like Superman and sings like an angel.

BLADE: Do you ever imagine backstory for your characters whose sexuality is undefined?

STAUDENMAYER: I do, but not with Wolfsheim. I don’t see it. I’m trying to be as butch as possible with this ruthless killer.

BLADE: Have you had to do that in your career?

STAUDENMAYER: For a long time, I wore a mask to hide my gayness. I worked hard on being believable, that I was into the girl or that I was a tough guy.

It’s a different world now, and it’s so refreshing to be around the younger actors today; they’re remarkably open and comfortable.

BLADE: What was your coming of age like?

STAUDENMAYER: I played high school football in Palm Springs [he chuckles, alluding to the arid gay mecca], and I was pretty good too. But much to the chagrin of my parents and coaches, I quit the team to act in our senior year play. My super butch dad played semi-pro football and he was an ex-cop. I’m named after him. While I didn’t become my dad, I’ve played him often on stage. He was a true Gaston [the bumptious rival in “Beauty and the Beast”]. And like Gaston, he used antlers in all his interior decorating.

BLADE: Did he live to see your success in theater?

STAUDENMAYER: He did. Life was challenging growing up but the last 10 years of his life we couldn’t get off the phone with each other [his voice catches with emotion]. He accepted me entirely, and we became very close.

BLADE: Looking ahead, is there a part you’d especially like to play?

STAUDENMAYER: Like all baritones I’d love to play Sondheim’s “Sweeney Todd.” I’ve come close but it hasn’t happened yet. There’s still time.