Opinions
Around the world, campaigns for marriage change hearts and minds
Right now, there are active campaigns to secure the freedom to marry for same-sex couples in dozens of countries around the world – spanning every continent and a wide variety of political contexts. While each of these campaigns is rooted in unique cultural and political dynamics, they have in common the potential to harness the power of marriage as both a goal and a strategy – leveraging the marriage conversation to change hearts and minds about LGBTQ people. Public campaigns for the freedom to marry are a unique opportunity to demonstrate that LGBTQ people are part of families and have the same need for family recognition as everyone else – helping to bring the needs and rights of LGBTQ people into a more familiar context for the broader public.
Not only does changing public attitudes toward LGBTQ people and their families have immediate, tangible impacts for the community, marriage campaigns have proven to yield an array of long-term benefits for LGBTQ civil society and democratic participation – including increasing overall support for LGBTQ causes, strengthening civic organizations, testing the implementation of new strategies to engage decision makers, training new generations of LGBTQ leaders, and instilling belief in activism, the rule of law, and effecting democratic change.
By familiarizing the public with LGBTQ couples and families and lifting the voices of allies, campaigns for the freedom to marry reduce homophobia and transphobia, leading to greater acceptance. The public conversation about the freedom to marry is uniquely centered on the resonant values of love and family, as well as freedom and dignity, helping non-gay people better understand gay people as individuals with loving relationships and families, just like everyone else. Also, unlike other policy changes, the legalization of marriage for same-sex couples is typically accompanied by strong media attention that magnifies the campaign’s potential to shift public attitudes. Even after securing the freedom to marry, polling data shows that public support for LGBTQ people continues to accelerate, creating a more inclusive society and enabling political progress on several other fronts, especially those most important to LGBTQ people.
For example, after Costa Rica in May 2020 became the first Central American country to affirm the freedom to marry for same-sex couples, a poll conducted by international research firm Borge & Asociados found an 18% increase in support for civil marriage for same-sex couples, as well as an increase in support for LGBTQ people more broadly. Nearly 40% of poll respondents reported personally developing a more positive opinion of gay and lesbian people in the previous 12 months and support for adoption and transgender nondiscrimination grew strongly after securing the freedom to marry. Costa Rica went on to enhance hate crimes and second parent adoption laws shortly after the marriage victory.
After Taiwan in 2019 became the first government in Asia to end the exclusion of same-sex couples from marriage, support grew significantly. According to government polling, only 37.4 percent of country residents had previously reported that they believed same-sex couples should be able to marry. However, by May 2023, four years after the marriage victory, the same agency reported that support for marriage had increased to strong majority support (62.6%), an increase of 25.2 percentage points. By 2024, support had climbed an additional 6.5 percentage points to reach an all-time high of 69.1%.
Even in countries that have not yet achieved victory, marriage campaigns are making an impact. In Romania, advocacy organization Asociatia ACCEPT launched a public education television ad in late 2023 that featured parents and their LGBTQ children. Months later, polling demonstrated a 26% swing in support for legally protecting same-sex couples, with a growth of 13% while opposition to protections decreased by 13% compared to 2021. Parents – the target audience of Accept’s paid media campaign – showed significant increases in support, with 55% now saying that if their child were gay they would like the law to allow them marry like anyone else, an 11 point increase. Demonstrating impacts beyond the issue of relationship recognition, the overall visibility of LGBTQ people in Romanian society has increased, with the number of people who know or interact with an LGBTQ person, from 19% in 2021 to 29% in 2024 as a result of a large-scale public education campaign centering LGBTQ people, their families, and marriage.
Similarly, Panama’s 2023 polling showed a 15.3% increase in support for protections for same-sex couples after two years of their “Sí Acepto” marriage campaign. Support for legal protections among Catholic Panamanians rose to 74.5% and, when asked about specific protections, such as visiting their partner in the hospital or making legal decisions together, Catholic Panamanians supported gay and lesbian couples at 84.3%. While the goal of achieving marriage may be a longer journey in countries like Romania and Panama, campaigns for the freedom to marry can still drive significant achievements in public opinion, paving the way for eventual victories.
Research shows similar gains in other countries where marriage campaigns are active. For instance, behind the efforts of Marriage for All Japan, support for marriage in Japan is now at an all-time high of 72%, rising 7% in two years. The Czech Republic also reached 72% support for marriage in 2023, months before the Jsme Fér campaign won the passage of civil partnership, representing an increase of nearly 25 points in four years of active campaigning. Pew research showed 60% support for marriage in Thailand in 2023, one year before the Thai legislature passed marriage legislation with a wide bipartisan majority.
Experience gained from working on marriage campaigns trains campaign leaders to achieve advancements on other issues. Once marriage was secured, Taiwan’s Marriage Equality Coalition, the campaign organization, was re-formed as the Taiwan Equality Campaign. Using strategies implemented to win marriage, TEC led successful advocacy efforts in 2023 to allow same-sex couples to adopt children to whom they are not biologically related. The large-scale campaign for the freedom to marry strengthened Taiwanese civil society, enabling sustainable, ongoing progress and paving the way for future victories. Government leaders now cite marriage for same-sex couples as a key indicator of Taiwan’s democratic society.
Achieving victory in a change campaign invites civil society organizations to empower leaders and supporters to engage in the democratic process, hold elected leaders accountable, and build the political power they need to make change. Marriage campaigns have encouraged leaders to learn and deploy key (and for some countries, new) tactics such as engaging business or faith voices, monitoring and publicizing elected officials’ stands and evolution, and promoting voter engagement. Freedom to Marry Global has worked with advocates to share best practices from around the globe and support local leaders as they test and implement these strategies in ways that suit the local context. This type of coordination and skill-sharing among LGBTQ groups within and across regions is exactly what our LGBTQ movement needs more of to succeed and not reinvent the wheel campaign by campaign.
Additionally, each campaign victory sends a positive message of momentum to neighboring countries. As the first-of-its-kind public education campaign in Latin America, Costa Rica’s Sí Acepto served as a model for the region. Leaders of Sí Acepto collaborated to export the materials and successes to other Latin American countries working to implement the Inter-American Court of Human Rights Advisory Opinion (OC-24). As a result, the impact of the Sí Acepto campaign is felt far beyond the borders of Costa Rica with similarly styled campaigns now active in Guatemala, Panama, Bolivia, and Peru. Progress is powerful and radiates in powerful ways beyond national borders.
While the freedom to marry and the critical protections and fundamental freedom and dignity that marriage brings to LGBTQ couples and their families are important ends in themselves, the public campaigns to secure marriage deliver much more. Marriage is important not just for the tangible and intangible meanings and protections it entails, but also as a strategy to fundamentally change the perception of LGBTQ people, generate momentum and support for further gains, and empower leaders with the skill and political muscle to continue making progress for their communities and their countries. Campaigning for the freedom to marry and the marriage conversation yield meaningful economic and democratic dividends for everyone. Love wins – and we all win.
Freedom to Marry Global and Council for Global Equality advocate for marriage equality in countries around the world.
Opinions
Unconventional love: Or, fuck it, let’s choose each other again
On Valentine’s Day, the kind of connection worth celebrating
There’s a moment at the end of “Love Jones” — the greatest Black love movie of the 21st century — when Darius stands in the rain, stripped of bravado, stripped of pride, stripped of all the cleverness that once protected him.
“I want us to be together again,” he says. “For as long as we can be.”
Not forever. Not happily ever after. Just again. And for as long as we can. That line alone dismantles the fairy tale.
“Love Jones” earns its place in the canon not because it is flawless, but because it is honest. It gave us Black love without sanitizing it. Black intellect without pretension. Black romance without guarantees. It told the truth: that love between two whole people is often clumsy, ego-driven, tender, frustrating, intoxicating—and still worth choosing.
That same emotional truth lives at the end of “Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind,” my favorite movie of all time. Joel and Clementine, having erased each other, accidentally fall back into love. When they finally listen to the tapes that reveal exactly how badly they hurt one another, Clementine does something radical: she tells the truth.
“I’m not perfect,” she says. “I’ll get bored. I’ll feel trapped. That’s what happens with me.”
She doesn’t ask Joel to deny reality. She invites him into it. Joel’s response isn’t poetic. It isn’t eloquent. It’s not even particularly brave. He shrugs.
“Ok.”
That “OK” is one of the most honest declarations of love ever written. Because it says: I hear you. I see the ending. I know the risk. And I’m choosing you anyway.
Both films are saying the same thing in different languages. Nina and Darius. Clementine and Joel. Artists and thinkers. Romantics who hurt each other not because they don’t care — but because they do. Deeply. Imperfectly. Humanly.
They argue. They retreat. They miscommunicate. They choose pride over vulnerability and distance over repair. Love doesn’t fail because they’re careless — it fails because love is not clean.
What makes “Love Jones” the greatest Black love movie of the 21st century is that it refuses to lie about this. It doesn’t sell permanence. It sells presence. It doesn’t promise destiny. It offers choice.
And at the end — just like “Eternal Sunshine” — the choice is made again, this time with eyes wide open.
When Nina asks, “How do we do this?” Darius doesn’t pretend to know.
“I don’t know.”
That’s the point.
Love isn’t a blueprint. It’s an agreement to walk forward without one.
I recently asked my partner if he believed in soul mates. He said no—without hesitation. When he asked me, I told him I believe you can have more than one soul mate, romantic or platonic. That a soul mate isn’t someone who saves you — it’s someone whose soul recognizes yours at a particular moment in time.
He paused. Then said, “OK. With those caveats, I believe.”
That felt like a Joel shrug. A grown one.
We’ve been sold a version of love that collapses under scrutiny. Fairy tales promised permanence without effort. Celebrity marriages promised aspiration without truth. And then reality — messy, public, human—stepped in. Will and Jada didn’t kill love for me. They clarified it.
No relationship is perfect. No love is untouched by disappointment. No bond survives without negotiation, humility, and repair. What matters isn’t whether love lasts forever. What matters is whether, when confronted with truth, you still say yes.
“Love Jones” ends in the rain. “Eternal Sunshine” ends in a hallway. No swelling orchestras. No guarantees. Just two people standing at the edge of uncertainty saying: Fuck it. I love you. Let’s do it again.
That’s not naïve love. That’s courageous love.
And on Valentine’s Day — of all days — that’s the kind worth celebrating.
Randal C. Smith is a Chicago-based attorney and writer focusing on labor and employment law, civil rights, and administrative governance.
The United States and the world are waiting for the Supreme Court to hand down its decisions in two cases (Little v. Hecox and West Virginia v. BPJ) that would rule on whether young trans women can play women’s sports at their schools. As trans journalist Erin Reed explained, these two cases are not just about transgender sports. These cases are litmus tests for trans rights at the nation’s highest courts and will have wide-reaching implications for the rights of trans and nonbinary people in the United States.
And these cases will impact cis women. As Orien Rummler reported for the 19th and them, anti-trans legislation and rulings threaten the rights of all women, especially cis women of color. The best example is the allegations that woman boxer Imane Khelif faced at the last Paris Olympics.
The gender policing that Khelif faced shows how sports bans that police who are considered a man or woman legitimize and mandate invasive medical testing, a form of medical abuse, against all women and girls who want to play sports. And let’s be clear — there is historical precedence for this.
The Nazi regime did use genetic screening in order to police who could have children as part of their “racial hygiene” programs, including marriage partner hereditary testing that flagged anyone with “tainted” genetic lineages. While prisoners in concentration and detention camps were subjected to horrifying medical experimentation, Nazi officials experimented with their own followers, facilitating reproduction only among people with desirable characteristics — notably those with blonde hair and blue eyes — and sterilizing those with undesirable genetics.
In fact, trans and gender non-conforming people were some of the first targeted by Nazi violence, with one of the first book burnings occurring in 1933 when Nazi youth and members of the Sturmabteilung ransacked the Institute for Sexual Science and burned one of the largest libraries of medical texts about gender affirming care. Nazi officials first exerted control over gender before extending this to race and religion.
And this was not confined to Nazi Germany. As I’ve written about before, the United States has used eugenics to justify the forced sterilization of women of color, disabled women, poor women, and incarcerated women. Forced sterilization was one part of forced or coerced medical testing that targeted Black and Indigenous women.
This medical violence, along with non-consensual experimentation including Dr. James Marion Sim’s gynecological experimentation on enslaved Black women, was rooted in systemic racism and medical abuse, and has contributed to legacies of mistrust and health disparities in medical institutions and practitioners.
When sports organizations, like the U.S. Olympic and Paralympic Committee, require women to undergo “sex verification,” they set a precedent of forced genetic testing that violates everyone’s privacy and could very well exclude many cis women from sports if they fall outside the bounds of what is defined as a “woman.”
The best example is cis women with Polycystic Ovary Syndrome. Some people with PCOS have hyperandrogenism, an excess of androgen, or experience hirsutism (i.e. the development of more traditionally masculine features like increased muscle mass and more pronounced facial hair.) Mandatory sex verification may diagnose or “out” women as intersex without their consent. Differences of Sex Development, another term used to describe intersex experiences, is more common than most people would expect.
Would women with PCOS not be considered women? What about women with more pronounced facial hair or greater muscle mass because of natural variation? It’s important to note what is considered American standards of womanhood are rooted in White supremacy — one of the reasons why women of color have been and will be targeted by anti-trans violence.
The very people making these decisions are also beginning to ask these questions. According to Erin in the Morning, Supreme Court Justice Amy Coney Barrett is even worried about the implications of these two Supreme Court decisions. As Alejandra Carabello, a Harvard Law educator, told Erin in the Morning, a decision supporting anti-trans sports bans “could result in the segregation of women in a host of other areas of public life under the rationale that biologically, men are different and they need to be segregated.”
Barrett, a conservative justice who was appointed by Trump in 2020, seems to acknowledge these risks, saying “your whole position in this case depends on there being inherent differences.”
There is not. According to science, gender is not a strict binary but a spectrum determined by biological, psychological, and social factors, including cultural norms surrounding gender.
The best indication of this is that intersex people exist. Intersex people are individuals born with sex hormones and characteristics that differ from a strict male to female binary. Some people are born with atypical genitalia, specifically external genitals that don’t look male or female or are underdeveloped. Some are born with phallia, a condition where a baby is born without a penis, some born with a “mismatch” between their internal and external organs.
In all of these cases, the idea of normal, mismatched and properly developed genitalia and bodily presentation is conditional upon a male and female binary reinforced by the medical establishment — and to be clear, this gender binary has hurt people. For decades, intersex babies have suffered medical abuse because doctors perform unnecessary surgeries to “fit” these children into a female/male binary. These medically nonessential surgeries performed on children who cannot consent are a form of medical assault.
To be clear, this is not the same as gender affirming care performed on consenting individuals who are receiving hormone therapy and surgery to align their gender presentation with their identity. As major medical and mental health organizers assert, gender-affirming care is medically necessary and lifesaving healthcare for trans and nonbinary people.
And the vast majority of children who are having gender affirming surgery are cis ones. A June 2024 study found that the vast majority of minors undergoing gender-affirming surgeries were cis children. This did not include intersex people who underwent surgery or people who received surgery for an illness or injury. About 97 percent of 150 cases where minors received gender affirming surgery in 2019 were chest reduction surgery performed on cis boys. This surgery is commonly performed on boys with gynecomastia, or develop enlarged breasts due to a hormone imbalance.
So for many, the decisions expected on these Supreme Court cases may seem confined to sports but in actuality, they have profound ramifications not only for cis women but also amid the growing escalation and legitimization of eugenics in the United States.
It’s no mistake that earlier this month, Dr. Elisa von Joeden-Forgey, president of the Lemkin Institute, stated that the U.S. is in the “early-to-mid stages of a genocidal process against trans and nonbinary and intersex people.” Dr. Gregory Santon, former president of the International Association of Genocide Scholars, flags “a hardening of categories” surrounding gender in a “totalitarian” way.
Stanton argues that this is rooted in Nazi ideology’s surrounding gender — this same regime that killed many LGBTQIA individuals in the name of a natural “binary.” As Von Joeden-Forgey said, the queer community, alongside other “minority groups, tends to be a kind of canary in the coal mine.”
Even the fact that discussions of the trans sports ban foreground its potential implications for cis women (or that this is the primary concern voiced by Barrett) showcases whose bodies take priority.
This framework reflects how members of the feminist movement have used and presently do use the movement to justify the very anti-trans exclusion that will harm them. Some call themselves trans-exclusionary radical feminists (TERFs); these women believe that codifying and protecting trans women’s rights threatens the rights of cis women and have even partnered with some conservative groups because of their commitment to enforce what it means to be a “biological woman.”
As history can show us, it’s exactly the opposite — first, feminism is rooted in equity for all people, all women, not just cis women. Because protecting trans women from medical violence like sex verification testing and challenging people and organizations that police who a woman is, protects all women.
Emma Cieslik is a museum worker and public historian.
The racist felon in the White House has sunk to what many people consider a new low, with his posting the disgusting depiction of the Obamas on his social media site. The depths to which he will sink would be considered unfathomable to many. But there is nothing we should think him incapable of. With this latest post, and refusal to apologize, I have to question the principles and decency of anyone, who still in any way, is willing to support him.
I once thought to give people taken in by his lies and carnival barker routine, the benefit of the doubt. I had the benefit of always knowing Trump was a liar and slimeball, having met him years ago in New York. I understood he learned well at the feet of his mentor, Roy Cohn, who was one of the more disgusting figures in New York politics. But not everyone knew that history. But now, after his behavior and actions, during the first year of his second term, I will not give the benefit of the doubt to anyone. If you still stand with the felon, you are a person with no principles, or decency, yourself. If you still support him you are standing with a man who first glorified the murder of a VA nurse, Alex Pretti, in Minneapolis, calling him a domestic terrorist. A man who said the ICE agents who did it were just doing their job. He did the same when they murdered Renee Good in cold blood, calling her a ‘domestic terrorist.’ He supported his agents acting like the Gestapo when taking a five-year-old boy into custody on his front stoop.
The felon went to Davos and in a stunning attack on our allies, claimed the men and women in their military never joined us on the front lines in Afghanistan, insulting all those who fought, and died, with our troops. He was either too dumb to know, or chose to disregard, that Article 5, a critical clause in the NATO pact, which means an armed attack on one member of the alliance will be treated as an attack on all members, was only invoked once in NATO’s history, and that was after the Islamist terrorists attacked the U.S. on Sept. 11, 2001.
He is destroying our country, and all our credibility around the world. He bows down to Putin and other despots. He clearly wants to be King of our country, and now an Emperor in the eyes of the world, as he threatens Greenland, and threatens to attack numerous other countries.
The problem those sycophants have, is I believe the people of the United States will finally understand he is destroying what is best in their lives. They will rise up and depose him; they will do it with their votes. Many of those who believed his lies and promises, are now seeing him as the “Emperor with no clothes.” He lied to them, and fooled enough of them, to win the election. They are waking up to the fact he is more senile than they thought Biden was, and clearly much less intelligent. They are seeing him for the grifter he is and finding out he cares not a bit for them, or their welfare. He clearly couldn’t care less that their grocery prices are going up, their rents are going up, their heating costs are going up, and for some, their healthcare costs are tripling. None of that bothers him in the least. He cares more about getting gift planes from Qatar, selling crypto coins, seeing Melania make money on a weird so-called documentary, and giving tax breaks to his rich friends and corporations.
The American people have fought a revolution before. We fought a king and won. This revolution may look different from that, and from the French Revolution. We may man/woman the barricades but will do so without guns. We will win with our votes.
The wealthy like Jeff Bezos, and others who see themselves as American nobility, corporate and media giants, who think the felon will make them even richer if they kneel before him, will in the long run be very disappointed. He has some power for a few more years, but even that will be curtailed when Democrats take back Congress in January 2027.
Peter Rosenstein is a longtime LGBTQ rights and Democratic Party activist.
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