Living
GLAA celebrates 40 years
Activists move from the street to the suite after 4 decades of work
Frank Kameny remembers seeing Paul Kuntzler, his campaign manager on a 1971 bid for Congress, walk into Temple Sinai on Military Road in Washington with large reams of paper rolled under each arm and an elated look on his face.
Kameny, who founded the gay liberation movement in D.C. after being fired from the federal government in 1957, needed 5,000 signatures to get on the ballot. With the late February deadline looming, the group only had about 1,300. Realizing outside help was needed, Kameny and Kuntzler thought a gay group in New York whom they found to be one of the few “getting much of anything done,” as Kameny puts it, might be able to help. The group — Gay Activists Alliance of New York — sent two busloads of people to blanket the District one Sunday afternoon to secure signatures.
A vintage 'Kameny for Congress' poster from 1971. This campaign inspired the launch of GLAA. (Image courtesy of Rainbow History Project)
A dance was held that night at the Temple and when Kuntzler arrived, the group knew it was home free. They had about 7,700 signatures — plenty to get Kameny on the ballot. The “Kameny for Congress” campaign ended with the candidate coming in fourth in a six-way race. Though he lost, the 1,900 votes he secured while running as a then-unheard-of openly gay candidate, galvanized local activists.
Kameny’s own Mattachine Society was fading as members began to find its formality anachronistic in the Vietnam era. And the D.C. Gay Liberation Front was too radical for some others. The Kameny campaign activists were so impressed with the GAA New York group, they used about $400 left in their coffers after the election to visit the Big Apple and find out how the group operated.
By about the third week in April, a D.C. chapter was formed in the apartment of Jim McClard, the local group’s first president. While the New York group folded about a decade later, Washington’s Gay Activist Alliance is celebrating its 40th anniversary this month (in 1986 then-president Lorri Jean — now head of Los Angeles’ mammoth LGBT Community Center — insisted on changing the name to Gay and Lesbian Activists Alliance, or GLAA as it is commonly known). It’s the oldest continuously active gay organization in the country.
The group celebrates Wednesday at the Washington Plaza Hotel in Thomas Circle. Kameny, now 85, will give his founder’s Champagne toast, as has become GLAA tradition. And the group will bestow its annual Distinguished Service Awards to six local activists. Minimum donations are $50. Visit glaa.org for more information.
Kameny says the group — which lists pages of political gains on its website — has thrived under strong leadership.
“Some of it has been sheer good luck,” he said. “Throughout the ’70s, ’80s and beyond, the group had a string of presidents who were absolutely superb. I said that frequently back then and I still say it. One after another, there were just a lot of great people. There may have been one or two duds, but they really had good people, good officers who kept the organization going. They kept it effective and were very dedicated.”
The group’s first effort was also its only formal collaboration with Mattachine and the local Gay Liberation Front — a protest of the 1971 American Psychiatric Association’s convention held that year in Washington. Though GLAA disavowed the use of force and worked to “act within the existing order,” that first effort involved storming the conference and seizing the microphone in an effort to convince APA brass that gays were not mentally ill.
“We couldn’t possibly be trusted with government secrets and security clearances if we were mentally disturbed,” Kameny said.
He chuckles at the tactics now and says the groups soon went in their own direction — GLAA with Robert’s Rules of Order for its meetings, a gay-specific focus and a strong commitment to non-partisanship.
“I used to attend the GLF meetings,” Kameny said. “They seemed to just drone on endlessly and you had the impression there was a small group meeting in the attic who really ran things. And they tried to tie in all the issues of the day. My feeling has always been if you try to do everything you end up doing nothing very well.”
Former president Craig Howell, who joined in 1973 and has been active ever since, admits the heavily political nature of the group’s work limits its appeal, but said its track record over 40 years speaks for itself.
The late Jeff Coudriet, a former GLAA president, speaks at the group's 2007 awards. (Blade file photo by Henry Linser)
“There’s always been a small number doing most of the work,” Howell said. “Many times we’d just be sitting there in the living room on [former president] Bob Carpenter’s couch. If we had four or five at a meeting, that was considered good. It’s always been very wonky, so that makes for limited people, but the devil is in the details and you have to go through that trivia to get what you want. But it’s worth paying the price.”
The group counts among its victories:
• Council’s 1973 passage of Title 34, which made Washington the first major U.S. city to outlaw discrimination against gays in housing, employment and public accommodations.
• Kameny’s 1975 appointment to the city’s Human Rights Commission, a first
• A 1978 gay rights rally, the largest of its kind to that time, to protest anti-gay singer Anita Bryant
• A 1979 public service campaign that required a court fight to allow “Someone you know is gay” posters to be placed at Metro stations
• Former president Mel Boozer’s 1980 speech at the Democratic National Convention
• Repeal of D.C.’s sodomy law in 1981
• A 1982 commitment from D.C. police for fair treatment of gays
• A 1986 Council bill that prohibited insurance companies from denying coverage to HIV-positive residents
• 1990 hate crimes legislation
• A 1992 domestic partnership bill
• A 1999 settlement in the Tyra Hunter case, a trans resident who was shunned and ridiculed by EMS workers following a car accident. She died in 1995.
• Part of a broad coalition that opposed an exception from the D.C. Department of Corrections from requirements in the D.C. Human Rights Act in 2008
• Marriage for same-sex couples in 2009
Current president Mitch Wood says the group is “really a labor of love” and that its non-partisan nature “allows us to build bridges across the political spectrum.”
It’s all volunteer and operates on a small budget of about $10,000 per year, most of which goes to maintain its website and blog and stage its annual awards reception. Money comes from nominal member dues — $25 per year — and ticket sales and donations. The group meets twice monthly for about 90 minutes, mostly at the Charles Sumner School but sometimes at the Wilson building. Meetings are usually followed by dinner and drinks, often at Dupont Italian Kitchen. New members are always welcome.
Among GLAA’s signature work is its candidate ratings. Members always point out the ratings should not be seen as endorsements, but they rank those running for local office based on questionnaire responses and members’ knowledge of the candidates’ records on gay issues, to rank them on a scale that runs from -10 to +10.
GLAA today (Blade file photo by Joey DiGuglielmo)
“Usually in every election cycle somebody working with one of the candidates or another gets unhappy that so-and-so didn’t get a high enough rating,” Rick Rosendall, the group’s vice president for political affairs and a former president, says. “So they’ll make some snarky comments, but because we back up so thoroughly how we arrive at our ratings, we can show the point breakdowns and their responses to the questions, so they know what went into the ratings. It’s a very open process, not some beauty contest score with us up in some ivory tower.”
Over the years, the group’s ratings gained heft. Though he notoriously voted against the marriage bill, Council member Marion Barry initially scored a -10 during his run for mayor in the early ’80s. The low score led him to work with the local gay community and for years he was seen as a supportive public official.
Rosendall said the group’s decades of groundwork pays off even in unlikely places. He cites the two Council members — Barry and Yvette Alexander — who voted against marriage, and also Council member Harry Thomas Jr., who opposed the infamous club relocation bill for gay bars in 2007.
“They’ve all at various times emphasized their pro-gay credentials,” Rosendall said. “Even though Barry did speak at one of Bishop [Harry] Jackson’s rallies in Freedom Plaza, it was a far cry from the hateful rhetoric you hear from state legislators. … And GLAA can take some of the credit for that, but the community has played a key role in this as well. … It’s not just a handful of policy wonks, it’s our community who has been active in this city since before home rule.”
Gay D.C. Council member Jim Graham, who’s received many perfect scores from the group, said he respects GLAA even when he occasionally disagrees with members.
Frank Kameny giving his traditional GLAA toast at the group's 2007 awards. (Blade file photo by Henry Linser)
“They put an enormous amount of sincere effort into it,” Graham said. “I mean they really do. It’s not anything they do in a casual way. And most recently I’ve been getting pretty much 10s, so you’re always happy with a perfect score.”
Rosendall says one big change over the years has been what he calls “street versus suite” activism. The group has moved away from demonstrations largely because it’s usually given a seat at the discussion table.
“As you get more power and influence, there’s less need to be standing outside,” he said. “That doesn’t mean there isn’t a place for groups like GetEqual. Different groups are good at different things. I like to say we’re working different parts of the vineyard.”
The group has, at times, faced criticism. Within the last four years or so, some activists, including Michael Crawford, said the group wasn’t moving fast enough on the marriage issue.
Rosendall said GLAA prides itself on avoiding excessive intramural fighting among other local activist groups.
“We really try not to let things deteriorate too much into personality and battles we don’t need,” he said. “We’ve tried to keep our collective eyes on the prize and the marriage victory demonstrated that. There’s no way we would have been doing all this policy work and building coalitions if we weren’t wanting it to happen. We just wanted to make sure it stuck.”
Graham said the group deserves praise for its tenacity, especially considering the era in which it launched.
“It’s difficult to imagine how very important and pioneering they were back in 1971,” Graham said. “In this day and age when we’ve made such progress, it’s important that we pause and acknowledge those who were there 40 years ago at a time when things were so very different. … The young men and women in our community really need to stop and realize this. We’re here because of these folks.”
Real Estate
‘Culture eats strategy for breakfast’
Real estate agents must adapt, learn how to manage from within
“Culture Eats Strategy for Breakfast” was a phrase often repeated in many of my management courses from the University of Illinois. The concept was discussed at length – how the best laid plans can sometimes be supported or derailed by the culture of the people involved in whichever project to be implemented. Whether it be a project to implement new software, roll out a new product or service, or just reaching a sales target, the way the team involved works together can indeed affect the outcome.
Perhaps this is just another way to say, “teamwork makes the dream work!” Most teams usually have someone who is designated as a leader. The leader can try to lead through authority and control or can alternatively try to lead through influence and encouraging a more collective framework for solving problems.
Why does this matter when picking the right real estate agent or team to work with? Besides having a job as a salesperson for the brokerage, the real estate agent is contractually bound to act on their client’s behalf. The buyer broker agreement is in place so that the agent and the client can work together as a team in communications regarding offer strategy, during negotiations, implementing marketing plans, as well as selecting which renovations or upgrades to choose before selling a property. After the property goes under contract, the job isn’t “done”. There is still work to do.
At this point, the agents then turn into a project manager of sorts – coordinating communications between the lending team, the title attorneys, the other client’s agents, any governmental agencies that could be involved in down payment assistance or helping to clear a property for a sale, and often times groups like a condo board, a home inspector, or contractors when arranging repairs and estimates before a final walk through.
In short, the agent takes on somewhat of a “leadership role” in the transaction and ensures that all the ducks stay in a row until the project is complete. That agent will hopefully be very fluid and forthcoming with their information, copying the required parties on all communications and creating a “paper trail” of who said what or didn’t offer to fix A, B, or C, so that all the minutiae of the contract can be addressed and fulfilled before the settlement date. The agent often must wear many hats and quickly learn the communication styles of an entire new set of people in a short period. One person may not return calls for a week after being contacted. Another person may go on vacation at the beginning of the process and not return emails for two weeks. Another person may wish to have daily updates of the progress of the process.
In this way – an agent quickly learns in each transaction that “culture can eat strategy for breakfast.” Because the agent must adapt to a wide variety of communication styles, learn how to “manage from within”, build support for closing the project by the due date, and somehow keep all the interested parties invested, engaged, and responsive.
Who you work with matters when picking the right person to represent you in your next transaction – so, just remember that “teamwork makes the dream work!”
Joseph Hudson is a referral agent with RLAH. Reach him at 703-587-0597 or [email protected].
Dear Michael,
I’ve been dating Mark for three years, living together for two, and I’m not sure he’s for me. We get along great but I’m questioning how attracted I am to him.
I was never crazy about him physically but he was such a sweet and smart guy that I wanted to date him.
Sex was never mind-blowing and the longer we’ve been together the more this is bothering me. I wonder if I could find someone who appeals to me more, physically.
On the plus side, I like him a lot. He has good values, shares my religious faith, which is hard to find in another gay guy, is responsible and has a good work ethic. Also, I just have fun with him and he’s always interested to hear what’s on my mind. He’s an all-around decent guy.
As I’m writing this, I’m thinking that he seems great and that I’m a fool for even questioning our relationship. But all my friends are always talking about the amazing sex they are having, and then I think I’m missing out on a key part of life because my sex life is comparatively lackluster.
I don’t want to settle. But how likely am I to find another guy who is as all-around a good catch as Mark, but with more sexual chemistry?
Michael replies:
I don’t think the right approach is to wonder about your chances for of finding someone better. Anyone you find will have things you aren’t crazy about.
For example, you might find someone whom you’re wildly attracted to sexually, but they’ll bore you or annoy you, or have values you don’t respect.
I understand that you aren’t wildly sexually attracted to Mark. The truth is that it’s extremely unlikely that you would remain wildly sexually attracted to anyone for that long. People tend to get used to each other over time. Sex can remain great, but more from closeness and love than heat and sizzle.
I work with people all the time who wonder if there is someone “better” out there. And I tell them, they’re never going to get through all the possibilities before they die. Instead, how about thinking if the guy you are with is someone you’d like to go with on this journey through life?
Mark’s attributes that you mention sound wonderful to me. After more than 30 years working with folks on relationships, and being in my own 30+ year relationship, I have learned a thing or two about what creates a relationship that is satisfying and good. A decent, kind guy with admirable values is an excellent start.
The question is, can you live with your sex life not being on an orgasmically hot mind-blowing level? I hope the answer is yes, because sex with anyone you pick is not likely to stay in that sort of realm for long.
Another point to consider: I don’t think you should get too caught up in what your friends are telling you. They may be having amazing sex, but are they all having it with the same long-term partner? As I mentioned, long-term sex can be great, but the excitement tends to be replaced by caring connection over time.
I’ll generalize here for a moment: Because so many gay men have many sexual partners, the kind of sex you have with someone new, whom you’re tremendously attracted to, tends to be glorified among gay men as the gold standard of sex. But it’s not realistic for sex with a long-term partner.
This glorification is a big problem: It leaves gay men who are not having torrid sex with lots of guys feeling like there is something wrong with the sex they are having, that they are missing out on something super fantastic. Just like you are feeling.
If you want a lifetime of ongoing hot sex, I don’t think you should be looking for a relationship. If you are willing to accept sex being a not-always fantastic, but perhaps consistently loving, often good, and occasionally great part of life with a kind decent guy, then Mark might just be the right partner for you after all.
(Michael Radkowsky, Psy.D. is a licensed psychologist who works with couples and individuals in D.C., Maryland, Virginia, New York, and all PSYPACT states. He can be found at michaelradkowsky.com. All identifying information has been changed for reasons of confidentiality. Have a question? Send it to [email protected].)
Real Estate
Does Pride decor resemble Trump’s design aesthetic?
Glitter, gold, and rejecting the idea that a home should be understated
Interior design is often a balancing act between taste, personality, and restraint. Sometimes, however, restraint leaves the building entirely. Such is the case when the colorful exuberance of gay Pride-inspired decorating collides with the famously excessive decorating style associated with the current occupant of the White House. The result can be a fascinating study in maximalism, spectacle, and unapologetic visual overload.
Donald Trump’s personal decorating style has long been a subject of debate among designers and critics. Admirers see luxury and grandeur. Critics see something else: a dizzying display of gold leaf, marble, mirrors, crystal, and oversized furnishings that often crosses the line from elegant into what many designers would call tacky. More is rarely enough. If one chandelier sparkles, three are better. If a room has gold accents, why not make every available surface gold? (See Oval Office and ballroom rendition for details.)
In many ways, this excess shares common ground with certain Pride celebrations. Pride has never been about blending into the background. It celebrates visibility, self-expression, individuality, and joy. Rainbow colors, dramatic costumes, glitter, flamboyant artwork, and bold statements have long been part of Pride culture. Yet there is an important difference. Pride’s extravagance is often playful, self-aware, and rooted in personal expression, while Trump’s aesthetic has frequently been criticized for equating luxury with sheer quantity and visual intensity.
Combining these influences creates an interior that could best be described as “glamorous chaos.”
Imagine entering a living room in which gold-trimmed mirrors stretch from floor to ceiling. Crystal chandeliers hang above a bright rainbow velvet sectional. Marble floors gleam beneath metallic furniture that appears determined to reflect every available light source. Pride flags become framed artwork surrounded by ornate gold moldings. A room designed this way doesn’t whisper. It shouts.
Color is central to the concept. Pride-inspired interiors often embrace the full spectrum of colors. Trump’s style, meanwhile, traditionally favors cream, gold, black, and glossy finishes. Combining them means introducing vivid jewel tones against a backdrop of faux-palatial luxury. Emerald green chairs, ruby-red draperies, sapphire-blue accent walls, and gold-trimmed furniture can coexist in a way that feels deliberately theatrical.
The key word is theatrical.
Many professional designers spend years learning how to create visual balance. A Pride-meets-Trump interior intentionally ignores many of those rules. Pattern competes with pattern. Shine competes with shine. Artwork competes with furniture. The eye rarely gets a chance to rest. For some homeowners, that sounds exhausting. For others, it sounds like the perfect party.
Lighting offers another opportunity to embrace excess. Crystal chandeliers, mirrored lamps, illuminated shelves, and color-changing LED lighting can transform a room into something resembling a cross between a luxury hotel lobby and a Pride festival. The goal is not subtlety. The goal is spectacle.
A dining room inspired by this combination might feature a massive glass table, gold dining chairs, rainbow floral arrangements, mirrored walls, and enough crystal accessories to keep a polishing cloth busy year-round. Critics would call it gaudy. Fans would call it fabulous.
Artwork becomes particularly important. Pride-themed pieces featuring LGBTQ+ history, activism, and culture can provide meaning beneath the decorative excess. Without these personal and cultural elements, the room risks becoming little more than a collection of expensive looking, but not necessarily expensive, objects. Pride design can work best when it reflects identity and community rather than simply displaying color for color’s sake.
While normally a haven for restful sleep, bedrooms can take a similar approach. Plush velvet fabrics, oversized tufted headboards, metallic and mirrored finishes, colorful accent lighting, and dramatic artwork create a space that feels more like a boutique hotel suite than a traditional bedroom. Again, the challenge is avoiding the temptation to add one more decorative element to an already crowded visual landscape.
What makes this design combination interesting is that both aesthetics reject the idea that a home should be understated. Both embrace visibility. Both invite attention. Both encourage occupants to take up space unapologetically. Yet where Pride design often celebrates authenticity and self-expression, Trump’s decorating style is frequently criticized for prioritizing conspicuous luxury over cohesion and refinement.
The result is an interior style that many people would consider delightfully outrageous and others would consider a decorating nightmare. Either way, nobody is likely to forget it.
In the end, a Pride-inspired interpretation of Donald Trump’s famously over-the-top aesthetic would be colorful, glittering, excessive, and impossible to ignore. It would break nearly every rule of minimalist design while embracing the philosophy that if something is worth doing, it is worth overdoing. Whether one sees that as fabulous or tacky may depend entirely on how much gold leaf and rainbow velvet one can tolerate in a single room.
Valerie M. Blake is a licensed associate broker in D.C., Maryland, and Virginia with RLAH @properties. Call or text her at 202-246-8602, email her at [email protected] or follow her on Facebook at TheRealst8ofAffairs.
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