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Macy’s CEO Jeff Gennette on coming out, AIDS, retirement — and what’s next

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Macy’s CEO Jeff Gennette retires effective Feb. 2 after seven years as one of America’s few openly gay CEOs of a publicly traded company. (Photo by Michael Avedon; courtesy Macy’s)

Jeff Gennette’s personal and professional journey is a unique one. 

Coming out in 1983 to supportive parents. Finding community as an openly gay man in ‘80s San Francisco, watching scores of friends die but ultimately surviving the AIDS plague. Embracing his sexual orientation professionally and excelling as a result. Cultivating a 33-year relationship, marrying, and having a child when adoption and surrogacy were nearly impossible for gay couples. Spending an entire career with the same company and retiring 40 years later as one of the few openly LGBTQ CEOs of a Fortune 500 company.

And not just any company making widgets, but Macy’s Inc., an iconic brand perhaps best known for bringing all of America — red and blue — together each Thanksgiving morning for 97 years at its spectacular parade kicking off the holiday season.

Now, after 40 years at Macy’s, including seven as CEO, that began with a management training program in 1983, Gennette, 62, is sitting down exclusively with the Washington Blade in a conference room in New York and reflecting on all the progress he’s seen the country make on LGBTQ rights and insisting he wants to stay involved in the fight.

“LGBTQ rights are under attack now and I want to be in that arena — and not as a leader of a public company,” he said when asked about his future plans. “Department store retail is not for the faint of heart and my husband and I have been so fortunate. We know our experience is not everyone’s experience and we’re in a position to be able to do something.”

When pressed, Gennette said he’s not yet sure what that looks like but, “I want to be in the fight,” perhaps in the philanthropic and donor space. He and husband Geoff Welch plan to take a few months to think through what’s next and how they might play a role in the LGBTQ movement. “That’s a clear passion of mine,” he said.

Gennette cites two professional accomplishments of which he’s most proud: leading Macy’s out of the retail-killing pandemic with a stronger balance sheet than before COVID; and helping to create the various DEI programs that foster an inclusive, healthy culture at the sprawling company. 

“I get a lot of energy from that and will take that into my next chapter.”

His last day at Macy’s will be Friday, Feb. 2 and it’s fitting that his final appointment on his final week is to attend the Human Rights Campaign’s Greater New York Dinner on Saturday where he will be honored with the HRC Corporate Visibility Award for his “unwavering dedication to bolstering LGBTQ+ inclusivity in business.” 

“As the LGBTQ+ community navigates a national state of emergency and faces an onslaught of targeted attacks, having the representation, leadership and support of such dedicated LGBTQ+ advocates fortifies our strength in this fight for freedom and equality,” said Human Rights Campaign President Kelley Robinson in a statement announcing Gennette’s award.

Despite the accolade, Gennette seems uncomfortable with the term “activist” and never would have predicted that he would become an important figure for LGBTQ visibility in corporate America.

 “I’m an introvert,” he said, “I never saw myself as a visible role model. My husband was more of an activist than I was; my head was down doing my work at Macy’s.”

Figures like Gennette have become accidental activists, helping to open minds — and board rooms — to future LGBTQ workers and executives who may never fully understand the challenges faced by previous generations. Chief among those challenges, perhaps, was AIDS. Gennette talks solemnly about those years in ‘80s San Francisco.

“When you lived in the Castro through the ‘80s, it was difficult; you had a community that was just being decimated by the scourge of AIDS and losing friends,” he recalls. “My husband lost his first two lovers to AIDS. Many people I worked with at Macy’s were lost to AIDS, you just couldn’t get away from it. It was a difficult time for all of us.”

Gennette added that living through the worst of AIDS in one of the hardest-hit cities ultimately proved cathartic because of the activism that resulted. 

“AIDS shaped my perspective on how a community can come together and influence local, state, and national lawmakers,” he said. “It ushered in a lot of political activity.” 

That activity triggered a wave of progress, from affirming state legislation, to out political leaders and celebrities, and ultimately to our first federal legal protections and eventually marriage equality. But the last two years have demonstrated the fragility of all that progress as state legislators across the country have introduced hundreds of bills aimed at rolling back our progress. Our right-wing enemies have tried everything from banning drag shows and LGBTQ-themed books to barring affirming healthcare for trans youth. There’s even a draconian “Don’t Say Gay” law now on the books in Florida that’s reminiscent of Vladimir Putin’s ban on “promoting homosexuality.” Not content with attacking only the LGBTQ community, Florida in January banned all DEI activities at state-funded colleges and universities. Welcome to 2024 America.

How does Gennette view these attacks and setbacks, especially given his own legacy of expanding DEI programs at Macy’s?

“Forward momentum always has consequences and the pendulum always swings back,” he warns. Gennette cites the overturning of Roe v. Wade as an alarming development in efforts to roll back settled law. “This idea about equality I don’t think we’re ever done with it,” he said. “What’s happening with the trans community is a testament to that. We need to stay organized and young people have to be vigilant about that.” 

His advice to young people embarking on their careers and applying for their first corporate jobs is to be out and authentic. “You’re never going to show up in your full potential if you don’t. … It’s going to take courage.”

Gennette found the courage to come out in the early 1980s when such pronouncements could mean the end of your career and estrangement from family. He was 19 years old and a sophomore in college with conservative but supportive parents. “I had a lot of anxiety about it, I said, ‘I‘m gay,’ — and my mom said, ‘You don’t mean happy.’” His parents were accepting but lamented the presumed loss of grandchildren. Years later, Gennette’s mother would assist in locating a surrogacy program that was open to gay couples, leading to the birth of daughter Judith in 2000. 

His mother passed away last October and he describes her as his hero and “most seminal figure in my life — she was a kick-ass pioneer” who carried the PFLAG banner along with Gennette’s father in the San Francisco Pride parade.

Meanwhile, back at Macy’s, Gennette came out to colleagues in his training program. One assistant buyer warned him that “people are talking” and that identifying as openly gay could be a “career killer.” But Gennette ignored the warnings and came out to his boss. 

“It was a big relief to acknowledge that to my boss,” he said. “It was like a weight lifted off my proverbial shoulders. I didn’t see senior executives that were gay, but I did see myself in the culture [of Macy’s] … It was a company that did right by disadvantaged communities even then in 1984.”

Gennette’s experience wasn’t the norm for corporate workers in the 1980s (or even today) and he acknowledges that the retail sector was more accepting. And Macy’s, in particular, proved a progressive home and played a key role in shaping the kind of executive he would later become.

“I don’t know that I would be a CEO today if not for that formative experience,” he said. “You’re on the pulse of pop culture and fashion and being gay was a part of my identity, but it wasn’t my full identity and I give Macy’s a lot of credit. I don’t know that I would be where I am if I’d been at a different company.”

Indeed different companies are responding to the recent attacks on the LGBTQ community in different ways. Bud Light faced a boycott last year after a promotional stunt with transgender TikTok star Dylan Mulvaney caught the intolerant eye of Kid Rock. Sales plummeted and parent company AB InBev’s stock fell 20 percent. The company responded by distancing itself from Mulvaney, which led to a boycott call from the LGBTQ community. Meanwhile, retailer Target faced a boycott over its wide selection of Pride month merchandise. The company responded by moving Pride merchandise from displays at the front of stores to less prominent locations in the back, which triggered criticism from LGBTQ advocates. 

Gennette said the Target incident had no impact on Macy’s, which offered its own Pride merchandise despite the boycott risk.

“It’s when you flip and succumb to pressure that you get yourself sideways,” he said, noting that, “It always comes back to your core values. We had Pride merchandise at the front of our stores and we were participants in Pride parades around the country.”

Further, Macy’s executives are always paying attention to what’s happening politically and culturally in case they need to respond. When the Dobbs decision overturning Roe v. Wade was leaked, Macy’s decided it would support any employees who had to travel out of state for abortion care. Other recent events have prompted internal discussion and response.

“George Floyd put us on notice about being vocal about our internal programs and how you use your CEO voice to be true to what you’re doing internally,” Gennette said. “With respect to Macy’s, our core values of inclusion and giving back, we’re always looking for a more inclusive future for all. We do a good job of taking the pulse of where things are — conservative and liberal voices — and anticipate what could be coming that we need to react to.”

That commitment manifests in several marquee DEI programs at Macy’s, including S.P.U.R. Pathways: Shared Purpose, Unlimited Reach, which the company describes as a “multiyear funding program to advance entrepreneurial growth, close wealth gaps, and shatter systemic barriers faced by diverse-owned and underrepresented businesses.” The program, created in partnership with Momentus Capital, has invested $30 million in underrepresented businesses and entrepreneurs, Gennette said. “We’re not taking our foot off the gas.”

The proactively progressive approach of Macy’s begs the question: Do we need more CEOs from underrepresented communities? And why aren’t there more openly LGBTQ CEOs of Fortune 500 companies?

Gennette is confident that the future will bring much more diversity to America’s board rooms and C-suites.

“We’re at the beginning of our journey still,” he said. “There will be more [out CEOs] in the coming years. I have a lot of interest in increasing LGBTQ presence in board rooms. There’s so much talent out there ready to become the next CEOs, it’s something I think about — how can I contribute in retirement to help on this question?” 

Before he jumps into a role in LGBTQ advocacy, Gennette plans to take some time off with husband Geoff. The two met at Gennette’s 30th birthday party in California.

“He showed up at the party and maybe it was the blue Speedo or the sonorous voice but we started dating from that point.” 

The two committed to each other in a 1995 ceremony, long before the advent of marriage equality. They’ve been together ever since, living in five states and nine cities. 

At the end of our conversation, Gennette agreed to a game of rapid fire.

• On the future of American malls, Gennette predicts there will be fewer of them but that they will be vibrant and offer a different mix of hospitality, eateries, and retail. “They will stand the test of time.”

• On Macy’s collaborator Martha Stewart, Gennette describes her as “a huge talent … authentically a purveyor and tastemaker on so many subjects. It comes across in all her work and programming. She’s an inspiration … Macy’s had a rocky relationship with her over the years but she has been an icon.”

• On Cher, who performed at last year’s Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade, Gennette said “she’s awesome, lovely, friendly, open to her fans and is authentically herself. She was aces.”

• On what keeps him up at night, Gennette cited his 24-year-old daughter’s wellbeing. “She was interning in a company and got a job offer so I’m resting easier now. She’s ready to strike out on her own, she’s on her way.” 

• And on his successor as Macy’s CEO, Tony Spring, Gennette calls him “a fantastic leader; he’s ready and has the right intelligence, experience, judgment, and temperament to take Macy’s to the next series of growth. He has the chance to do what he did for Bloomingdale’s to Macy’s.” He noted that Spring has spent 10 month transitioning into the new role and that he has “the team and strategy and support of the board.”  

The Macy’s board recently rejected a $5.8 billion takeover bid after laying off more than 2,300 employees and closing five stores. Shares of Macy’s closed last week up 4 percent after a report that private equity firm Sycamore Partners is interested in taking Macy’s private. Gennette declined to comment on those recent developments but he remains bullish on the future for Macy’s.

“Macy’s serves a big tent — red states, blue states — everyone in America has been touched by someone who’s gay and that activism is changing hearts and minds,” he said. “We serve a diverse nation and standing for that is good for profitable business.”

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The mastery of love

The world knows Eric Anderson as Billy Porter’s partner, but in Rehoboth Beach, he has a story entirely his own

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Eric Anderson and Billy Porter met at a Christmas party and ended up talking until the sun came up. (Photo courtesy of Eric Anderson)

The world knows Eric Anderson as Billy Porter’s partner. In Rehoboth Beach, Del., he has a life — and a story — entirely his own.

My first time with Eric Anderson was hot — very hot. Before he arrived, I sat waiting, overthinking everything. When he finally appeared in a loose-fitting T-shirt and purple shorts, I understood why he attracts attention. Eric is the kind of man who changes the energy of a room simply by entering it.

After a quick hello, we got right to it. Techno pulsed through the room as Eric told me how to move, where to place my hands, when to breathe. My heart pounded. My muscles ached. I bent, twisted, and stretched while sweat ran down my back and burned my eyes. I didn’t bother wiping it away.

To be clear, Eric and I were not alone. Five other people were with us — and the yoga studio at SoulFire Collective in Rehoboth Beach was heated to 87 degrees.

“If you are always racing toward the next moment, what happens to the one you’re in?” Eric asked, opening his power yoga class and inviting us to leave whatever had followed us through the door and surrender to the present. Surrender did not come easily. At 58, I’ve done enough yoga to know the difference between discomfort and imminent death. Halfway through Eric’s relentless flow, the distinction began to blur.

A playlist of techno and remixed pop — including “Live Like You Were Dying” — carried us from one demanding pose to the next. Eric moved among the mats with the energy of a nightclub DJ and the calm of someone who trusted our bodies to go further than our minds believed possible. Nearly an hour later, when the music softened and I collapsed onto my back in savasana, he laid a cool cloth across my forehead. I exhaled — relieved, and maybe a little disappointed, that my first time with Eric was over.

At the end of my mat, a handwritten note congratulated me on my first class and invited me back — a small benediction after the storm. Then Eric closed the class by repeating the question with which he’d opened. For a man whose relationship with actor and singer Billy Porter has drawn him unexpectedly into the public eye, it sounded less like a yoga mantra than a personal creed.

The next time I meet Eric, there is air conditioning and caffeine. We are at Starbucks, where I deliberately order the largest drinks available, as though volume alone might buy me more time. He chooses a matcha, and I order herbal tea. My heart is pounding again, faster than the soft rock drifting from the speakers above us. Although I’ve already spent more than an hour with Eric, I know almost nothing about the man I’m about to interview.

Neither, it seems, does anyone else.

Celebrity outlets offer a handful of biographical details: a Rehoboth Beach teacher and yoga instructor with a master’s degree from Columbia University. Gay publications have been less restrained. One introduced him as Billy Porter’s “total hot stud,” called him “a snacc,” and praised his ability to “rock a Speedo.” Queerty distilled Eric’s identity to five words: “Porter is dating a teacher.”

All of it tells me how the world sees him. None of it tells me who he is.

I know from our text exchanges that Eric is slammed for time. He is scheduled to travel to New York later that day and fly to WorldPride Amsterdam the following afternoon. Billy is among the headliners for the opening-night Unity Concert and is also slated to perform at the Wedding Party XXL alongside KI/KI, Bimini, and the Vengaboys. Eric still has to pack. This, I’m beginning to understand, is part of loving someone famous: there is almost always an itinerary, another city, and a specific time and place Billy needs to be. Even here, with two untouched drinks between us, the clock is ticking.

Eric Anderson (Photo courtesy of Eric Anderson)

As soon as we sit down, I open my laptop, ready to get to work. My mind is focused on the list of questions I’ve prepared, and I’ve already anticipated the shape of most of his responses. Then I look up and see Eric sitting perfectly still, smiling, and taking in the moment. He hasn’t even taken a sip of his matcha yet.

I quietly close my laptop and breathe.

Within minutes, the interview softens into a conversation.

Eric earned a bachelor’s degree in history from the University of Delaware and a master’s in public school leadership from Teachers College, Columbia University. He began his career teaching mathematics before moving into school administration, eventually serving as vice president of the Charter School of Wilmington and head of school at Sussex Academy. Today, he teaches mathematics and social studies in the Cape Henlopen School District. He also coaches soccer and leads yoga classes at SoulFire Collective in Rehoboth Beach.

His return to the classroom was deliberate. Eric knows some people assumed there must be a story behind his leaving administration—that he had done something wrong or that teaching represented a demotion.

“I want to make it clear that I went back to teaching by choice,” he says.

As a child, Eric played school. Teaching has always felt natural to him, less like an occupation than an expression of who he is. Administration was different.

“It felt like work,” he says. “It wasn’t where my passion was, and it didn’t bring me joy. Going back into the classroom was simply me choosing joy.”

The more Eric talks, the clearer it becomes that teaching is not merely a job but a vocation. His mother is white and his father is Black, and growing up biracial was not always easy. “I saw the best and the worst of both,” he tells me. Those experiences helped shape his desire to become a teacher — to be the kind of person who could make a meaningful difference in a young person’s life.

Just then, Eric glances over his shoulder and locks eyes with someone across the room. He waves and flashes what is quickly becoming his signature smile. My first thought is that someone has recognized him as Billy Porter’s partner.

I’m wrong. It’s one of his former students.

Inevitably, our conversation turns to love — and to Billy. I’ve made it clear that I’m here to write about Eric, not Billy Porter. But separating the two entirely would be as artificial as defining Eric only by their relationship. Billy is now an essential part of his story.

Eric met Billy at a Christmas party hosted by mutual friends who had been trying to introduce them all night. It wasn’t easy — the party was crowded, and the two men never quite crossed paths. Eric stayed for the afterparty, where a friend nudged him and nodded toward the room: Billy was looking his way. Romance never crossed his mind.

Eventually, they started talking. Eric has never had much patience for small talk, and he wasn’t interested in cataloging which celebrities Billy knew. He skipped it entirely and went straight for the deeper questions — what Billy believed, how he saw the world, what mattered to him. They ended up at the kitchen table, trading life philosophies until 5 a.m.

What struck Eric most wasn’t the conversation’s length. It was its depth. Billy wasn’t who he expected. Neither was the conversation. By the time the sun was coming up, Eric was less surprised that they’d talked all night than by how much, it turned out, they had in common.

They had dinner the following evening, and Billy invited Eric to spend the weekend with him in New York. There, Billy took him to see Nicole Scherzinger in “Sunset Boulevard.” Right before the show started, he casually introduced Eric to a friend named Katy. Back in their seats, Eric asked how Billy knew her.

“BITCH,” Billy replied, “that is Miss K-A-T-Y P-E-R-R-Y!”

For all the glamour surrounding their courtship, Eric describes the foundation of their relationship in decidedly spiritual terms. His favorite book is don Miguel Ruiz’s The Mastery of Love, which explores how fear, expectation, and the need for approval can distort relationships. Its philosophy closely resembles Eric’s own.

On the surface, Eric and Billy inhabit different worlds. Eric is a deeply spiritual teacher rooted in a small coastal Delaware town. Billy is a celebrated actor and performer whose larger-than-life persona commands stages around the world. But when I ask Eric how the relationship works, he doesn’t hesitate.

“I know that I can be my authentic self with him, and he can be his with me,” he says. “We love each other unconditionally.”

The words could sound rehearsed. Coming from Eric, they don’t.

The red carpets, famous faces, and international travel are not what matter most.

“It’s all about the people,” he explains. “I love Billy’s family and friends, and he loves mine.”

Authenticity surfaces repeatedly in our conversation — not as an abstract ideal, but as Eric’s determination to trust what feels right for him, even when other people may not understand it. I tell him about growing up in Pittsburgh and spending much of my life trying to fit the person I was into the person the world expected me to be. Eric listens intently, then pauses before responding.

“Fuck the system.”

It is blunt, funny, and entirely consistent with the man sitting across from me. Dating Billy may have dramatically increased the number of strangers who have opinions about Eric, but it hasn’t increased the number whose opinions matter to him. He is remarkably unconcerned with what people he doesn’t know think — or say — about him. The attention is new. His response to it is not.

For Eric, authenticity isn’t about asking the world for permission to be yourself. It’s about deciding that permission was never the world’s to give.

That instinct—to look inward rather than outward for permission — predates Billy.

Eric initially turned to yoga for a practical reason: he wanted to improve his physical performance on the soccer field. It didn’t take long for him to realize that something else was happening. Yoga was strengthening his body, but it was also grounding him.

Over time, the physical practice became inseparable from the mental one. The poses, the heat, even the strength required to hold his body in place became less important than learning how to quiet the noise around him, stay present, and listen to himself. The man who had pushed me through an hour of sweat and discomfort wasn’t simply teaching people how to move their bodies. He was asking them to practice something he had learned to do himself.

That sense of being grounded has become particularly important in a relationship that often requires two people to live very different lives. Eric is quick to point out that he and Billy have separate careers, separate ambitions, and goals entirely their own. Neither expects the other to abandon an individual life simply because they have chosen to build a relationship together.

When Billy left for London to star in “Cabaret,” distance became part of their routine. They FaceTimed every day, a practice they continue whenever they are apart.

“I tell Billy everything,” Eric says.

Being authentic with Billy doesn’t require the two men to become more alike. If anything, the opposite seems true. They are comfortable following their own career paths, living separate lives when circumstances require it, and giving each other the freedom to pursue what matters individually. Then they come back together — not because either has put his own life on hold, but because they have chosen to share those lives with each other.

When we finally look at the time, nearly 90 minutes have passed. Eric still needs to pack. New York is waiting, Amsterdam after that, and somewhere there is undoubtedly an itinerary telling Billy exactly where he needs to be and when.

But for a while, neither of us was racing toward the next moment.

We were fully inside the one we were in.

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What ‘Queer Eye for the Straight Guy’ can still teach us

Producer David Collins on lasting impact of hit series

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David Collins (Photo courtesy of Collins)

It’s hard to imagine where LGBTQ+ television would be without “Queer Eye for the Straight Guy,” the trailblazing reality series that premiered in 2003. 

Each episode of this Emmy-winning show saw a group of gays converge on a struggling man — the titular straight guy — and offer nonstop wit while organizing his endlessly messy life. This program about a group of homosexual helpers took the world by storm, furthering the love of gay television begun by shows like “Will and Grace” but bringing it into the growing medium of reality TV. Of course, it wasn’t perfect; “Queer Eye for the Straight Guy” often cast its experts less as multi-faceted queer folks and more as sources of early 2000s gay jokes. But despite these pitfalls, it’s undeniable that the original program explored the realities of being gay in a way audiences had never seen before. It was a monumental piece of LGBTQ+ representation, and its success is largely owed to the man who fought to get this show made: producer David Collins. 

Collins spoke with the Blade from his Los Angeles home, where he’s spent the past few years living with his husband and his two daughters. David spoke fondly of his many years in the industry, detailing how it feels to be such a huge part of LGBTQ+ history. He explained, however, that he didn’t initially set out to alter how queer people were seen on television. “I never went out to make gay television,” said the producer. “I went out to tell great stories.”

“I’m a hillbilly from Ohio, and I thought I was going to be an editor,” David laughed, looking back on his career. “I interned at the Cincinnati Film Office, and I showed up to work my very first day, and the film commissioner was like, ‘Get to the airport right now and pick [someone] up. Don’t talk to them.’ Well, I ended up picking up Jodie Foster.” Collins raved about this car ride that changed his life, with the pair becoming friends and Foster pushing him to become a producer who puts their own media out into the world. Eventually, he did just that, and after learning about the wild new genre that was reality TV, he pitched a series to Bravo: “Queer Eye for the Straight Guy.” 

“I was obsessed with Esquire magazine, and they had five categories: fashion, grooming, interior design, culture, food, and wine. So I gave them each a gay, and the Fab Five were born!” Collins said, describing how viewers quickly fell in love with the concept and earned the program four seasons and an Emmy for Outstanding Reality Program. He spoke about how proud he felt creating a show that centered real gay people, not characters in a story, remembering, “To stand in the middle of Times Square and look up and see this massive billboard with the original Queer Eye guys…it wasn’t even a dream come true, because it wasn’t a dream I had even fathomed.”

With his series, people were watching actual gay men and learning the realities of a queer culture that had always been portrayed as a danger to society. Collins tearfully recounted hearing about queer people using the show as a way to connect with their family, saying, “What I’m most proud of that’s come out of Queer Eye [are] the conversations that that series has allowed to have people around their kitchen tables with little boys in Ohio like me who were scared to death that they were going to burn in hell because their pastor was telling them that they were a sinner.”

Now, for all of its trailblazing, the program wasn’t wholly positive; the show’s focus on the central ‘straight guy’ meant it rarely delved into the lives of its Fab Five. Collins regretted that lack of depth but understood that earlier audiences weren’t accustomed to such a nuanced look into queerness — that would have to wait for the reboot. 

When “Queer Eye” came out in 2018, audiences were introduced to not only a new Fab Five, but a whole new format (that didn’t rely on a straight person). Now, the series would assist queer folks and allies alike, spotlighting these individuals as well as the queer experts helping them improve their lives. The show has been applauded for its amazing makeovers, but where it truly stands out is its representation, offering a look into individuals across the country and the struggles — along with the immense joys — of being queer in America today.

Fans were disappointed to hear that “Queer Eye” would be ending after its 10th season, but David stressed that they wouldn’t have to be sad for long. “What I will say to you is this: hang tight,” he teased. “There’s yet another version of ‘Queer Eye’ to come, and we’re working on that now.” In the meantime, Collins is continuing his work with new shows like the “House of Stassi,” a series centered on “Vanderpump Rules’”prolific waitress. He’s excited about these new projects, but emphasized that his heart will always belong to “Queer Eye for the Straight Guy” and all that it continues to do for viewers 19 years after its finale. 

“It’s not about your new outfit or your new couch or your new whatever. It’s about your humanity,” said Collins, speaking about the core lesson he hopes people take away from the Queer Eye franchise. “It’s about seeing yourself. It’s about dignity. It’s about how confidence breeds success.”

A valuable message that queer folks can benefit from even more now than they did in 2003. And, while it’s unclear just what lies ahead for this franchise, one thing is for sure: “Queer Eye for the Straight Guy” helped people everywhere understand the power that exists within our queerness. It’s a truth that has impacted countless pieces of LGBTQ+ television today, and it’s one that Collins promises to keep alive through whatever hit show he creates next. 

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Jason DePuy on coping with homophobia in ‘Big Brother’ house

First drag queen contestant on CBS show fought to stay positive

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Jason DePuy on Big Brother (Photo courtesy of CBS Broadcasting,Inc.)

One week after Jason DePuy (known as Salina EsTitties on “RuPaul’s Drag Race”) was bullied and eventually evicted from CBS’s “Big Brother” house, the queer drag performer is still emotionally processing his feelings.

During his 24 days in the reality TV competition, DePuy often had a rough time, with fellow cast member Kamuela “Kamu” Kirk making homophobic comments and feeling isolated.

In a conversation with Head of Household Rick Devens, Kirk left viewers upset when he said, “Bro, miss me with the drag stuff. Miss me. I’m still an MMA guy, and I have an image to uphold.”

Former “Big Brother” contestant Frankie Grande called his words  ‘homophobic’ and ‘gross.’ Another comment, where Kirk said he wanted to end DePuy’s career, also received strong backlash online.

Now that he is out of the house, DePuy has been shocked and deeply touched by the love from “Big Brother” fans and former contestants. We chatted with DePuy for this Blade exclusive.

“To know that my community was rallying for me outside the house was the most wonderful thing. Seeing how much people were just wanting to shower me with love was incredible. Even my friends, I went to say hi and give them a hug, and they’re like, ‘Uh, uh, come here.’ They had to hold me and let me know America was feeling for me in a way that I had no idea.”

He added: “To see that reality was just overwhelming, and I couldn’t ask for more.”

Known as a messy player in the house, DePuy often had to fight to stay positive and stand up for himself. 

“No one was coming to my rescue. In real life, it’s easy to block people, but in the house, I didn’t have that luxury, so I had to find it within myself to learn how to speak up for myself in a way that wasn’t nasty or biting. I didn’t attack anyone personally, which is what I was the most proud of.”

DePuy acknowledged he has had a history of putting his foot in his mouth when it came to certain “Drag Race”moments, being in the public eye, and making a fool of himself. “I’ve learned my lessons; to see how I handled myself in the ‘Big Brother’ house was amazing.” 

While DePuy has been sober for 14 and a half years and has a strong spiritual foundation, in the Big Brother house, he often felt like he couldn’t communicate what he was feeling. 

“As a queer person, a person of color, a drag queen, I have to be very careful about how I move. I don’t have the luxury or privilege to just act a certain way or say a certain thing. I have to be very careful; I’m representing me. But who I am is a Latino, a person of recovery, a drag queen, a queer person in the community. I know that there’s a lot of pressure that comes with that. I felt it was safer for me to sit there and just breathe than try to do anything crazy.”

He continued: “I couldn’t speak to the personal attack that was happening in the house, because in my mind I was like, ‘no, this is a game, and I have to play it, put that aside.’”

Not only can viewers watch the episodes, but they can also watch the live feeds of what’s happening. Seeing the fans’ social media posts from people who had watched the episodes and the live feeds also contributed to DePuy realizing that his feelings of discomfort were valid.

“To know that I wasn’t delusional in those moments, that others could see what was happening, has been a lot to take in. Fans and friends let me know the comments made went beyond the game…I’m like, ‘Oh, so my instincts were correct.”

One of the most poignant moments on the live feeds occurred when DePuy was crying, alone in his room, and said how he missed his gay community.

“I really missed my friends. I missed my queer community. We’re so colorful. We’re so loud. We’re so vibrant. We speak off the cuff, and we’re very truthful and honest with how we speak, and it’s fun. We have fun lingo.”

DePuy had to censor his expressions in the house. “Because I can say one thing, but it can mean something different to straight people than it does with my queer brothers and sisters. So, there was a sense of code-switching that I had to do. I had to even put aside some of my queerness in a way sometimes to fit in.”

DePuy was thrilled to be the very first drag queen to ever be cast on the show. 

“I’m honored to have been chosen. There’s a million drag queens out there, and to know that I was a contender to come in the house and not even be in drag was like a wow for me. I’m over here in Hollywood, running around these streets with a wig and heels just to make a dollar to survive, and I have to rely on drag to do that. And then to be offered this opportunity and be given the privilege to say, ‘hey, you don’t have to put on the wig for you to be valuable here,’ is just insane to me.”

Prior to his shows, DePuy has been hustling for 15 years, flipping burgers and doing drag at night.

“That has been my life these past since I was 17. So it’s been a long journey; the opportunity to do this out of drag is a very big blessing. I’m honored and grateful to be the representation of my community.”

If you missed Jason on “Big Brother: Unlocked,” the episode can be seen on CBS.com. He will be back on the show for the finale.

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