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Our culture of victimhood

Enough already — Obama doesn’t hate gays so stop whining

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President Barack Obama
President Barack Obama

President Obama received high marks in an unscientific straw poll of LGBT voters the Blade conducted during Capital Pride. (Photo by Pete Souza, courtesy of White House)

To hear the president’s progressive critics describe Obama’s first term, you’d think it was George W. Bush all over again.

From former Army Lt. Dan Choi to the folks at Equality Matters to a horde of disgruntled liberal bloggers, Obama can’t catch a break. He’s anti-equality because he won’t publicly endorse marriage. He didn’t repeal “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” fast enough. His Justice Department can’t be trusted.

Rather than praise Obama and others responsible for scheduling this week’s first-ever Senate hearings on repealing the Defense of Marriage Act, Choi slammed the process, complaining that the scheduled witnesses for the Senate Judiciary Committee hearing are “exclusively white and privileged.”

Richard Socarides, president of Equality Matters, said Obama should “stop trying to have it both ways” by remaining in opposition to same-sex marriage while saying his position could evolve as he demonstrates support for married same-sex couples in other ways.

“When he says his position is ‘evolving,’ he’s not for same-sex marriage or against it,” Socarides said. “If the president wants to be on the right side of history, he needs to start leading on this issue now, or he’s going to be left in the dust by other progressive leaders who are already on board.”

Socarides, of course, served as principal adviser on gay issues to President Bill Clinton from 1993-1999, when Clinton signed both “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” and the Defense of Marriage Act. Clinton didn’t just sign DOMA, he bragged about it in 1996 campaign ads broadcast on Christian radio stations. And while Bill Clinton belatedly and reluctantly announced support for same-sex marriage, his wife, Secretary of State Hillary Rodham Clinton, still describes marriage as between “a man and a woman.” Her opinion is factually wrong, given that same-sex marriage is the law in a handful of states, D.C. and a growing list of foreign countries.

The idea that Clinton acolytes, including former adviser Paul Begala, are joining the chorus of Obama critics is laughable. Sure, Obama ought to endorse marriage equality and he will sometime in the next two years. But he long ago left the Clintons in the dust when it comes to advocating for LGBT equality.

Maybe it’s because I was in D.C. covering the entire George W. Bush era and remember all too well the dearth of positive gay news during that time — save for a couple of momentous court rulings — but the Obama criticism rings hollow. His list of pro-LGBT accomplishments is long and unrivaled for an American president.

Is the culture of victimhood so entrenched in the LGBT community that we can no longer recognize a true ally when he invites us into the White House? Obama has told us repeatedly that we should continue to push and criticize and many of us have and will. But the mindless harping — “evolve already!” — will have one lasting result: to depress LGBT voter turnout and donor enthusiasm in 2012.

The Human Rights Campaign was assailed for its early endorsement of Obama’s re-election, an absurd criticism given the sorry lot of homophobes running for the Republican nomination. After three years of progress and polls shifting in favor of LGBT equality, Michele Bachmann and her allegedly heterosexual husband Marcus have brought the discredited practice of “ex-gay” therapy back to the headlines. One of the top GOP contenders thinks homosexuality is a choice and that we can be “cured.”

Kudos to Truth Wins Out for going undercover to expose what we all suspected was happening at the Bachmanns’ counseling center: the discredited practice of reparative therapy.

It would be entertaining if not for the incalculable damage “ex-gay” therapy causes to young people confused about their sexual orientation.

The revelation begs the question: Is Michele Bachmann’s husband also a client? Has Marcus Bachmann undergone therapy to “change” from gay to straight?

The Bachmanns have lied about the clinic’s work for years and denied accusations of trying to “cure” gay people. The video from TWO proves it. In it, a counselor tells the TWO investigator that it’s possible to be “totally free” of same-sex attraction.

This would all amount to yet another GOP sideshow if not for new polls showing Michele Bachmann taking the lead over Mitt Romney in Iowa.

The state of the Republican Party should be cause for great alarm, not just among LGBT people, but sensible Americans of all stripes. The Tea Party faction of the GOP is willing to force the United States into default, unleashing untold financial disaster, all in the name of destroying President Obama and reclaiming the White House. The job of president won’t be worth spit if the country defaults on its debts and we’re sent into another Great Depression, something the last Republican president nearly wrought.

Mainstream Republicans, including those at Log Cabin, must denounce Bachmann and the media should continue to hound her at every stop until she directly answers questions about the dangerous practices underway at her family’s counseling center. In addition, if federal money went to support this clinic’s work, the government must investigate and demand a refund.

There is too much momentum in the LGBT movement now to risk a Romney-Bachmann ticket prevailing next year. Obama’s critics are right to demand more, but there comes a time in politics to sober up and deal with the reality of what’s attainable and which battles require more time to win.

Kevin Naff is editor of the Washington Blade. Reach him at [email protected].

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Commentary

The cost of speaking one’s mind

Colombian artist José Miel’s recent comments on Pride, LGBTQ community sparked controversy

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José Miel (Photo courtesy of José Miel)

Colombian artist José Medina, known professionally as José Miel, 34, originally from Bogotá, is going through one of the most complex moments of his public career. Following his exit from “La casa de los famosos Colombia,” his name has been placed at the center of a controversy that has gone beyond the realm of entertainment and into a broader terrain: the debate over freedom of expression, diversity, and the limits of dissent within a society that defines itself as inclusive.

Miel is not an improvised figure. His trajectory in music, acting, and television reflects a sustained process of training, work, and exposure across different platforms. He participated in “Yo me llamo” (2019) and “La Descarga” (2022), establishing himself as a versatile artist within the Colombian entertainment industry. His career has been built through effort, in an industry that does not guarantee permanence without discipline.

However, the recent focus is not on his artistic work, but on his statements.

On March 15, the program “La Red” on Caracol Televisión released an interview on its digital platforms in which the singer spoke openly about the difficult moment he is facing, stating that his words — referring to comments he made after leaving “La casa de los famosos” — “cost him dearly.” His opinions on Pride, inclusive language, and the LGBTQ acronym triggered an immediate and polarized reaction.

From that moment on, the debate moved beyond the content of his words and opened another angle that cannot be overlooked.

Miel is known for the precision, firmness, and clarity with which he expresses his ideas. He is not an improvised artist, neither in discourse nor on stage. However, amid this controversy, a question also arises — one that deserves consideration from a journalistic standpoint:

What was the intention of the journalist, commentator, or media outlet that posed the questions leading to these statements?

This is not about shifting responsibility for what was said, but about understanding the context in which it occurred. At a moment in his career marked by multiple opportunities and projects, Miel’s responses placed him at the center of a controversy with real consequences.

In that sense, it is worth asking whether these were genuine questions within an open dialogue, or whether they followed a more provocative line, aimed at generating headlines or exposing the interviewee in a sensitive terrain.

This is not a minor question.

In media environments where every word can be amplified, the role of the one asking the questions is also part of how the story is constructed.

Within this context, this outlet held a phone conversation with the artist this Wednesday in order to gather his position directly. What follows are his responses to three central themes: the consequences of his words, his identity, and his call for respect.

Regarding the personal cost of expressing his opinion, Miel was clear:

You are now paying a high price for speaking your mind.

Do you regret having spoken out, or do you still believe your voice is non-negotiable?

Response:

“I believe that as human beings we all know that giving an opinion on any topic will bring problems. That’s the problem with society: it doesn’t respect other people’s opinions, because many think they are always right, and that’s not the case. Everyone has their reasons, everyone has their opinions, and those must be respected — even if you disagree.

What I expressed was an opinion without discrimination, without harming anyone, without stepping on anyone. And yet the opposite has been done to me: I’ve been trampled on, harmed, threatened, sent very ugly messages, harassed, hate coming from everywhere.

I knew what I was getting into. I knew what could happen. But I am proud of myself. I am proud of my conviction, and I will defend it until the end, because I truly believe in what I said. I do not regret it.”

When addressing his stance on labels, Pride, and how he defines himself, the artist stated:

You say you don’t identify with certain expressions of Pride or with the acronym.

So how do you define who you are, without labels or molds?

Response:

“Well, I don’t identify with Pride marches because they don’t represent me at all. They would represent me if they were respectful and appropriate, because many families attend — children, grandparents, parents … everyone is there.

And it’s quite disrespectful to see many people — not all, I emphasize — exposing their bodies, wearing very little clothing, drinking alcohol, intoxicated, using drugs. I don’t think that’s the way I would seek respect and equality.

I don’t like the term LGBTIQ+ community or all the letters that keep being added, because I feel that these acronyms make people discriminate more. I understand why they exist, because I know that what is not named does not exist, but I feel it is not the right way.

To me, everyone is part of society. We are human beings.

I don’t have labels or molds. I am a man, I am homosexual, and that’s it. The fact that I wear makeup or more feminine clothing is part of my artistic work, part of the stage. My everyday life is completely different.”

Finally, when referring to the reactions he has received, Miel insisted on a point that runs throughout his position:

You speak about respect, yet you’ve received attacks even from within the same community. What do you say today to those who call for inclusion but do not respect when someone thinks differently?

Response:

“I realized that the same community discriminates against itself. Many gay people have written to support me, telling me how brave I am, that they think the same way but don’t dare to speak.

To those who disagree with my opinion, I say: respect it, even if you don’t like it. You can express your opinion because we live in a free country, but do it with arguments, from your perspective, without stepping on others.

Because that is not the way.

I understand the struggles, I understand what is being sought, but I feel that if other ways of fighting were heard, many things could be achieved through respect and equality.

Everyone is free to think and say what they want — but always with respect. It’s that simple.”

Beyond his statements, what the artist is currently facing was also exposed in the March 15 interview on “La Red.” In that space, Miel described in his own words what he called a “string of problems”: constant harassment on social media, direct threats, hate messages, canceled performances, loss of contracts, and stalled projects due to external pressure and boycott warnings.

This situation not only highlights the media impact of his words, but also the material consequences that expressing an opinion can have in today’s digital environment.

His statements also drew reactions from the political sphere. Colombian Congressman Mauricio Toro wrote on social media:

“Hate and discrimination are learned. Sometimes they are so deeply rooted that they turn against oneself. José Miel, neither you nor I have anything to hide or to be ashamed of. Being free and loving without fear is the greatest thing you can experience as a human being.”

However, this position was also criticized. A significant number of users — even those who do not agree with the artist’s statements — have insisted that his right to express his views must be respected, pointing to a growing tension between inclusive discourse and tolerance for dissent.

The case of José Miel goes beyond a media controversy. It reflects a broader reality: the difficulty of sustaining respect when opinions do not align, even within spaces that promote diversity.

In a context where social media amplifies every stance, reactions to difference become immediate and, in many cases, disproportionate.

Beyond individual positions, what happened raises a deeper question:

Is it possible to speak of inclusion if we are not capable of respecting difference?

The philosopher Voltaire left behind an idea that remains relevant:

“I disagree with what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it.”

That is the point.

Because if a society is not capable of upholding the right of others to express themselves — even when it is uncomfortable — then it is not building inclusion; it is merely managing agreement.

And in that scenario, the case of José Miel stops being an isolated episode.

It becomes a test.

A test of how far we are willing to go in respecting others when they do not think like us.

Support does not mean agreement.

In this case, support means something more basic and more necessary: defending the right to exist, to think, and to express oneself without being destroyed for it.

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Opinions

The outrage economy is not the LGBTQ community

We can respect every person’s humanity without feeding algorithms

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(Photo by New Africa/Bigstock)

There is a simple truth I want to start with, because it matters and because it is too often lost in the noise.

I believe every human being deserves dignity.

I believe in individual freedom. I believe in treating people with respect. I believe adults should be able to live their lives openly, safely, and without harassment or fear.

That includes LGBTQ people. Always. But there is something else we need to say with the same moral clarity.

The outrage economy is not the LGBTQ community.

In recent months, as debates about schools, speech, and identity continue to dominate headlines, it has become increasingly clear how easily genuine conversations about dignity and freedom are drowned out by a profitable outrage cycle.

Right now, too much of what passes for “LGBTQ news” is not about people’s lives, safety, or equality. It is about engagement. It is about clicks. It is about fundraising. It is about manufacturing the next emotional flashpoint. And people are exhausted.

Most Americans are not waking up in the morning looking for a fight about language or labels. They are worried about rent. They are worried about insurance. They are worried about traffic. They are worried about whether their kids are safe and learning. They are worried about whether their paychecks still stretch to the end of the month.

The culture war is not most people’s daily life. It has become an industry.

And like any industry, it needs fuel. It needs conflict. It needs constant escalation. It needs the next headline that triggers the strongest reaction.

Social media algorithms reward exactly that. The loudest and most extreme reactions are amplified, pushing the most sensational interpretation of any story to the top of everyone’s screen. That is why we keep seeing the same pattern: ordinary human experiences are repackaged as identity controversy.

A celebrity reflects on not feeling traditionally feminine, and within hours it becomes a viral referendum on gender identity. A personal observation becomes a cultural battleground. The internet is told it must choose a side. This is not liberation. It is marketing. And it is not harmless.

Because while adults argue about language and labels online, real kids are struggling offline.

Children today are growing up in a world that is louder, faster, and more psychologically intense than any generation before them. Anxiety is rising. Depression is rising. Social isolation is rising. Bullying has migrated from the hallway to the phone, and it never stops.

Kids are being exposed to adult conversations at younger and younger ages, often without the maturity or support systems to process them. Here is the part that should concern everyone, regardless of politics. Our schools are not resourced for this reality.

We do not have enough counselors. We do not have enough psychologists. We do not have enough early childhood behavioral specialists. We do not have enough social workers. We do not have enough trained staff able to identify distress early and intervene appropriately.

Florida, like the rest of the country, faces a serious shortage of youth mental health professionals. When children struggle, too often there is simply no one available to help early.

In many communities the need is obvious and urgent. Yet the conversation we keep getting is not about expanding mental health support, strengthening early intervention, or helping families navigate difficult moments.

Instead we get a never-ending cycle of political conflict that makes everyone more anxious and less able to hear one another. Let me be clear about something. Individuality is not the problem. People are complex. People do not fit neatly into stereotypes. Many never have.

A woman who does not feel like a “girly girl” is not a threat. A man who does not relate to traditional masculinity is not a threat. People exploring their identity is not a threat.

The real problem is the commercialization of identity.

When media outlets treat every celebrity quote as a cultural emergency, they are not helping LGBTQ people. They are feeding a machine that thrives on division. And that machine does not care who gets hurt.

It hurts trans people, because it turns their lives into content and controversy instead of treating them as human beings navigating deeply personal realities.

It hurts gay people, because it reduces an entire community to a political symbol rather than recognizing the diversity of real lives and experiences.

It hurts women, because it suggests that not fitting stereotypes requires a new label, when the entire history of women’s equality has been about expanding freedom beyond those stereotypes.

It hurts families, because it creates confusion without support and noise without guidance. And it hurts the arts as well.

Drag, theater, and performance have long been places where society explores humor, character, and freedom. But when everything becomes political warfare, the public begins to associate even artistic expression with endless conflict.

People withdraw. Not because they hate anyone, but because they are exhausted by the noise. This is the great irony of our moment. A culture that claims to be expanding freedom is, in practice, shrinking it. Not through laws alone, but through fear.

Fear of saying the wrong thing. Fear of being attacked online. Fear of asking a sincere question. Fear of being dragged into a fight that never ends. We cannot build a healthy society that way. And we cannot build a healthy LGBTQ movement that way either.

The LGBTQ community did not fight for decades to replace one set of rigid boxes with another. The goal was always freedom. The goal was dignity. The goal was the right to live honestly without harassment and without the state policing private life.

If we want to protect that legacy, we need to be honest about what is happening now.

There are advocacy organizations doing important work. There are journalists covering real issues responsibly. There are educators and mental health professionals trying to help kids navigate a complicated world.

But there is also a profitable ecosystem of consultants, influencers, and outrage merchants who benefit from keeping the temperature high. They do not want resolution. They want engagement. And engagement requires conflict.

So what do we do? We return to what actually helps. We invest in mental health resources in schools. We expand early childhood support. We make sure kids who are struggling can access qualified professionals. We strengthen families and communities instead of turning them into ideological battlegrounds.

We treat adults like adults. We respect personal freedom. We stop demanding that every workplace become a permanent cultural battlefield. Professionalism is not oppression. Respect is not hate. Equal treatment is not cruelty. We also stop confusing stereotypes with identity.

Not feeling “massively feminine” is not a crisis. It is a normal human experience. It does not need to become a viral controversy. We can respect every person’s humanity without feeding the outrage economy. We can support individuality without turning every personality trait into a cultural emergency. We can defend LGBTQ dignity without empowering a machine that profits from division.

Most of all, we can choose leadership that lowers the temperature instead of exploiting the fire. Because the truth is this: the public is not as hateful as the internet suggests.

The public is tired. The public is overwhelmed. The public is struggling.

And what most people want now is a culture that feels calmer, fairer, and grounded in reality again.

That is not a threat to LGBTQ equality. It may be the only way it survives.


Fabián Basabe is a Florida State Representative.

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Botswana

Lorato ke Lorato: marriage equality, democracy, and the unfinished work of justice in Botswana

High Court considering marriage equality case

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(Bigstock photo)

As Botswana prepares for the resumption of a landmark marriage equality case before the High Court on July 14–15, the country finds itself at a critical constitutional crossroads.  

At first glance, the matter may appear to be about whether two women, Bonolo Selelelo and Tsholofelo Kumile, can have their love legally recognized. At its core however, this case is about something far more profound: the dismantling of patriarchy, the decolonization of law, and the integrity of Botswana’s constitutional democracy. 

Beyond marriage: a question of power 

Marriage, as a legal institution, has never been neutral. It has historically functioned as a  mechanism for regulating women’s bodies, sexuality, and social roles within a patriarchal  order. To deny LBQ (lesbian, bisexual, and queer) women access to marriage is not merely to exclude them from a legal benefit, it is to reinforce a hierarchy of relationships, where heterosexual unions are deemed legitimate and all others invisible. This case therefore challenges the very foundations of who gets to love, who gets to belong, and who gets to be protected under the law. 

As feminist scholars have long argued, patriarchy is sustained through institutions that  appear ordinary but are deeply political. The law is one such institution. And it is precisely  here that this case intervenes: by asking whether Botswana’s legal system will continue to uphold exclusion, or evolve to reflect the constitutional promise of equality. 

A constitutional journey: Botswana’s courts and human dignity

This is not the first time Botswana’s courts have been called upon to affirm the dignity of  LGBTQI+ persons. Over the past decade, the judiciary has built a progressive body of  jurisprudence grounded in equality, nondiscrimination, and human dignity. 

In Attorney General v. Rammoge and Others (Court of Appeal Civil Appeal No. CACGB 128-14, 2016), the Court of Appeal upheld the right of LEGABIBO to register as an organization. The court affirmed that: 

“The refusal to register the appellant society was not only unlawful, but a violation of the  respondents’ fundamental rights to freedom of association.”

This was followed by the ND v. Attorney General of Botswana (MAHGB-000449-15,  2017) case, where the High Court recognized the right of a transgender man to change his gender marker. The court held: 

“Gender identity is an integral part of a person’s identity … and any interference with  that identity is a violation of dignity.” 

In Letsweletse Motshidiemang v. Attorney General (MAHGB-000591-16, 2019), the High Court decriminalized same-sex activity, declaring sections of the Penal Code unconstitutional. Justice Leburu powerfully stated: 

“Human dignity is harmed when minority groups are marginalized.” 

This decision was affirmed by the Court of Appeal in Attorney General v. Motshidiemang (CACGB-157-19, 2021), where the court emphasized: 

“The Constitution is a dynamic instrument … it must be interpreted in a manner that gives effect to the values of dignity, liberty, and equality.” 

These cases collectively establish a clear principle: the Constitution of Botswana protects all persons, not just the majority. 

The marriage equality case now asks a logical next question: If LGBTQI+ persons are entitled to dignity, identity, and freedom from criminalization, why are their relationships still denied recognition? 

Decolonizing the law: What is truly ‘UnAfrican’? 

Opponents of marriage equality often argue that homosexuality is “unAfrican.” This claim, while politically powerful, is historically inaccurate. Same-sex relationships and diverse gender identities have existed across African societies long before colonial rule. What is foreign, however, are the laws that criminalize these identities. 

Botswana’s anti-sodomy laws were inherited from British colonial legal systems, not from  indigenous Tswana culture. As scholars of African history have demonstrated, colonial  administrations imposed rigid Victorian moral codes that erased and suppressed existing  sexual diversity. To claim that homosexuality is unAfrican, while defending colonial-era laws, is therefore a contradiction.

A truly decolonial approach to the law requires us to ask: Whose morality are we upholding? And whose history are we erasing? 

Marriage equality, in this sense, is not a Western imposition: it is part of a broader project of reclaiming African dignity, plurality, and humanity. 

Democracy on trial: the question of separation of powers

This case also raises important questions about the health of Botswana’s democracy. 

Following the 2021 Court of Appeal decision affirming the decriminalization of same-sex  relations, Botswana witnessed public demonstrations, including marches led by groups such as the Evangelical Fellowship of Botswana (EFB), opposing the judgment and calling for the retention of discriminatory laws. 

While public participation is a cornerstone of democracy, these events raise deeper concerns about the separation of powers. Courts are constitutionally mandated to interpret the law and protect fundamental rights, even when such decisions are  unpopular. When judicial decisions grounded in constitutional principles are publicly resisted on moral or religious grounds, it risks undermining the authority of the courts  and the rule of law itself. 

Democracy is not simply about majority opinion: it is about the protection of minority rights within a constitutional framework. 

Botswana is not a theocracy 

It is also important to clarify a recurring misconception: Botswana is not a Christian nation. 

Botswana is a secular constitutional democracy and more accurately, a pluralistic society that recognizes and respects diversity of belief, culture, and identity. The Constitution does not elevate one religion above others, nor does it permit religious doctrine to  dictate legal rights. The law must serve all citizens equally, regardless of faith. 

To frame marriage equality as a threat to Christianity is therefore misplaced. The question before the courts is not theological, but constitutional: Does the exclusion of same-sex couples from marriage violate the rights to equality and nondiscrimination?

Love, equality, and the future of justice 

At its heart, this case is about love, but it is also about power, history, and justice. It asks whether Botswana is prepared to move beyond colonial legal frameworks and patriarchal  norms, and to embrace a future grounded in equality, dignity, and inclusion. 

It asks whether the Constitution will continue to be interpreted as a living document, one that evolves with society, or remain constrained by outdated moral assumptions. Ultimately, it asks whether Botswana’s democracy can hold true to its founding promise: that all persons are equal before the law. 

As the High Court prepares to hear this case in July 2026, the nation has an opportunity to affirm not only the rights of two individuals, but the broader principle that love, in all its diversity, deserves recognition, and protection. 

Lorato ke lorato.  

Love is love. 

Justice, if it is to mean anything at all, must make space for it.

Nozizwe is the CEO of LEGABIBO (Lesbians, Gays and Bisexuals of Botswana)

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