Arts & Entertainment

Double blessing

Young Iowa man writes moving memoir of having lesbian parents

Published

13 years ago

May 31, 2012

Terri Schlichenmeyer

‘My Two Moms’
By Zach Wahls with Bruce Littlefield
Gotham Books
$26
234 pages

(Photo courtesy the publisher)

For author Zach Wahls, family has a familiar meaning to which many can relate, but his normal is slightly different as he explains in his new book, “My Two Moms.”

From the moment he was conceived, Zach Wahls was a member of an unusual family.

His mother, Terry, was an unmarried internal medicine physician at a Wisconsin hospital when she decided she was ready for children. But first, she had to convince IVF doctors to do the procedure because they said they did not “do” illegitimate children.

A few years later, she had the procedure again with the same donor and gave her son a biological sister because a family was what Terry always wanted. It was icing on the cake when Terry met Jackie and they fell in love.

For most of his early childhood, Zach Wahls didn’t think much about the fact that he had two moms. It was no big deal to other kids, so it was no big deal to him. When the family moved to Iowa to live closer to Terry’s mother, though, Wahls encountered teasing and bullying.

But his mothers had raised him with good values and they instilled a sense of character in their son. They taught him that boys and girls are equal but different and that there is no better gender. They showed him that the world is “rarely black and white.” He learned that words can hurt, and so can being told you have no rights.

From his “Short Mom,” he learned the meaning of commitment and loyalty. His “Tall Mom” taught him cheerfulness. And when Zach Wahls was asked to testify in front of the Iowa House Judiciary Committee, both moms’ lessons of bravery were evident.

Looking for a book that will warm your heart and make you proud of young men like this? “My Two Moms” will do the trick.

But while the book is endearing, it can be a choppy read. Wahls (with Bruce Littlefield) bounces from thought to thought in this memoir, giving us half a story here, half there, and something completely different in between. That’s appealing, in an eager-puppy sort of way, but this literary spill makes a mess sometimes.

Still, Wahls’ main message boldly holds this book together and overcomes the chaos to shine through. Love is love is love, he shows his readers, and gender doesn’t make any difference. Gender is not what makes a family.

In his book, Wahls asks, in many ways, “What’s the big deal?” and I think the answer lies in his story. If you’ve been asking the same question, look for “My Two Moms” and pick it up.

Calendar

Calendar: March 21-27

LGBTQ events in the days to come

Published

5 hours ago

March 21, 2025

Tinashe Chingarande

Friday, March 21

“Center Aging Friday Tea Time” will be at 2 p.m. on Zoom. This is a social hour for older LGBTQ adults. Guests are encouraged to bring a beverage of choice. For more details, email [email protected].

Go Gay DC will host “LGBTQ+ Community Social in the City” at 7 p.m. at Hotel Zena. This event is ideal for making new friends, professional networking, idea-sharing, and community building. This event is free and more details are available on Eventbrite.

Saturday, March 22

Go Gay DC will host “LGBTQ+ Community Brunch” at 11 a.m. at Freddie’s Beach Bar & Restaurant. This fun weekly event brings the DMV area LGBTQ community, including allies, together for delicious food and conversation. Attendance is free and more details are available on Eventbrite.

Black Lesbian Support Group will be at 11 a.m. on Zoom. This is a peer-led support group devoted to the joys and challenges of being a Black lesbian. You do not need to be a member of the Beta Kappa Chapter or the Beta Phi Omega Sorority in order to join, but they do ask that you either identify as a lesbian or are questioning that aspect of your identity. For more details, email [email protected].

Sunday, March 23

Go Gay DC will host “LGBTQ+ Community Coffee and Conversation” at 1:30 p.m. at As You Are. This event is for someone looking to make more friends and meaningful connections in the LGBTQ community. Attendance is free and more details are available on Eventbrite.

Monday, March 24

“Center Aging Monday Coffee & Conversation” will be at 10 a.m. on Zoom. This is a social hour for older LGBTQ adults. Guests are encouraged to bring a beverage of choice. For more details, email [email protected].

Queer Book Club will be at 7 p.m. on Zoom. This month’s read is “Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe” by Benjamin Alire Sáenz. For more information, email [email protected].

Tuesday, March 25

Genderqueer DC will be at 7 p.m. on Zoom. This support group is for people who identify outside of the gender binary – whether you’re bigender, agender, genderfluid, or just know that you’re not 100% cis. For more details, visit genderqueerdc.org or Facebook.

Coming Out Discussion Group will be at 7 p.m. on Zoom. This is a peer-facilitated discussion group and a safe space to share experiences about coming out and discuss topics as it relates to doing so. For more details, visit the group’s Facebook.

Wednesday, March 26

Job Club will be at 6 p.m. on Zoom. This is a weekly job support program to help job entrants and seekers, including the long-term unemployed, improve self-confidence, motivation, resilience and productivity for effective job searches and networking — allowing participants to move away from being merely “applicants” toward being “candidates.” For more information, email [email protected] or visit thedccenter.org/careers.

LGBTQ Senior Spring Fling Dinner and Dance will be at 6 p.m. at the True Reformer Building. Join Capitol Hill Village, DACL, The DC LGBTQ+ Community Center, Iona, and Seabury for its first-ever event of this kind, where there’ll be a DJ, special party favors, and lots of good food. To RSVP, visit the DC Center’s website.

Thursday, March 27

The DC Center’s Fresh Produce Program will be held all day at the DC Center for the LGBT Community. People will be informed on Wednesday at 5 p.m. if they are picked to receive a produce box. No proof of residency or income is required. For more information, email [email protected] or call 202-682-2245.

Virtual Yoga with Sarah M. will be at 7 p.m. on Zoom. This is a free weekly class focusing on yoga, breath work, and meditation. For more details, visit the DC Center for the LGBT Community’s website.

Photos

PHOTOS: Ziegfeld’s/Secrets Reunion Party

Crush event celebrates legendary venue

Published

2 days ago

March 19, 2025

Michael Key

Ella Fitzgerald performs at the Ziegfeld's/Secrets Reunion Party at Crush Dance Bar on Saturday, March 15. (Washington Blade photo by Michael Key)

A Ziegfeld’s/Secrets Reunion Party was held on Saturday, March 15 at Crush Dance Bar. The event celebrated and remembered the legendary local LGBTQ venue Ziegfeld’s/Secrets, closed in 2020. Performers at the reunion party drag show included Ella Fitzgerald, Destiny B. Childs, Tatiyanna Voche and Kristal Smith.

(Washington Blade photos by Michael Key)