Living
Back to School
How it got better at American University
Fay Jacobs (AU, circa 1970) strumming in the dorm, at a very different time for gay students. (Photo courtesy of Jacobs)
Editor’s note: This is the third installment in our “Back To School” series assessing the LGBT climate on university campuses as told by alumni we’re pairing with current students to tell their stories. This week: Fay Jacobs and American University. Visit washingtonblade.com for previous installments.
On May 4, 1970, when the tragedy at Kent State burst onto the screen, Neil Young wrote the unforgettable anti-war lyrics “Tin soldiers and Nixon’s coming.” Fay Jacobs, a senior at American University was accustomed to participating in anti-war rallies on campus in front of the Mary Graydon Center. The news came only twice daily back then — broadcast on console TVs the size of today’s Mini Cooper. But the pot boiled over the next day on Cinco de Mayo with AU students protesting more vociferously than ever. Typically, the protests were handled by campus police, but this time, the D.C. police showed up with noxious tear gas.
Jacobs was in rehearsal for a French Operetta in the campus theater. When the tear gas missed the activists and landed on the steps of the theater, the actors, singers, musicians and men in tights all went running in different directions.
“I hid in the bushes with my pal Rob,” she recalls. “It was all very frightening. Except for the guys in tights running amok. Come on, that’s funny.”
You’d expect nothing less from a renowned comedy writer who’s published two books: “As I Lay Frying” and “Fried and True” — a woman whose favorite movie was “Funny Girl” and whose father taught her that no experience should be considered bad if you can tell a good story about it later. And so we sit to talk about her experiences at AU “back in the day” and the trek that brought her out of the closet and into the bright light of lesbianism.
It would be decades before Melissa Etheridge would walk across fire for another woman. So, like most of us in those days without visible gays, Jacobs focused on textbooks and the bard, lived isolated in the closet, conforming to hetero ideals and dated men.
Her focus was on politics and social justice. Long before RFK was a stadium named in memoriam, she campaigned for Robert F. Kennedy, the man. She vividly recalls the candlelight vigil the night Martin Luther King, Jr. was murdered. And the many war protests. She could wage a full-throated protest against the war but remain mute about the war within. It was just too risky. Her own struggle for authenticity would be deferred for a decade, until after she graduated and kicked down the closet door.
Salina Rivera (class of 2014) benefits from an LGBT student center on campus. (Photo by Josh Halprin)
AU senior Salina Rivera stands on the same steps of Mary Graydon Center 43 years later and points north.
“My girlfriend and I live about a five-minute walk that way,” she says. Ironically, it’s not far from where Jacobs’ closet was. Out since age 13, and so grateful for her loving parents, she’s only sorry that her father died before she could tell him.
“He was a corrections officer in that male-dominated environment, and yet he never made me feel odd for being the Tom Boy,” Rivera said. “We always played basketball together. I know he’d understand me.” After his untimely death, her mother carried the torch of accepting parent and is, today, Rivera’s straight hero. “I have never met a stronger, more loving person.”
With such solid loving support, the Bronx native blossomed. She was class president in high school and today she is proud to be one of seven founding sisters of AU’s chapter of the lesbian Gamma Rho Lambda sorority — one of five LGBTQ organizations on campus. Her queer peers can join other active organizations and have access to “Safe Space 2.0” and a course named “Trans 101.” She and her girlfriend attend campus events together — usually rallies for social justice. Holding hands. Ho hum. “It’s hard to believe students were ever in the closet here at AU,” Rivera said. “It’s so progressive and inclusive today, but I realize it’s a privilege not to be taken lightly.”
Erin Fuller, immediate past president of the AU Alumni Association, and a straight ally agreed.
“As a student in the 80’s, I watched in awe this year as the campus greeted the coming out of their immediate past president of student government as a transgender person with a collective, supportive shrug. I see the amazing work that the entire division of Student Life does to support everyone from first-generation college attendees to students celebrating their cultural, ethnic and sexual identities, and it makes me incredibly proud to be a part of something so wonderful and so important.”
In hindsight, Jacobs’ life blossomed quickly after she came out. She’s not at all bitter about the late start in life and that in her 31st year, it was time to write her own story. Today she’s driving back to her home in Rehoboth Beach from Dover, Del., where she’s celebrating the movement toward marriage equality with her straight hero, Delaware Gov. Jack Markell. She’s a local celebrity in Rehoboth. Her zany wife Bonnie is the love of her life and the subject of many of her regular columns in Letters from CAMP Rehoboth. From their madcap adventures in the RV, to their frequent visits to the ER, Jacobs chronicles their hysterical antics.
It wasn’t always a bed of roses for Jacobs. Shortly after graduation she married Bob, a classmate, who made a living playing the accordion. It wasn’t long before they both knew something was amiss. I ask if they got together after the break up to watch Lawrence Welk, where accordions ruled.
“No, I moved on, man-free and accordion-less.”
Barbara Gittings, the lesbian activist who picketed the White House in 1967 and founded Daughters of Bilitis is her gay hero.
“She was relentless, brave, determined and most importantly, a heck of a lot of fun,” Jacobs said. Pre-Stonewall, Barbara was one of several brave souls that demonstrated each year on the Fourth of July in Philadelphia. Asked about her gay hero, Rivera thinks for a moment and then points to the office of the coordinator of the LGBTQ Center where we are chatting: “It would be Matt Bruno. He’s unbelievable. Whether it’s help with a cover letter or a fight with my girlfriend, he’s always there for me.”
The Center of campus has an interesting story. Mary Graydon was a generous benefactor of AU until her death in 1926. She’s famous for focusing on the education of women, once saying, “I prefer to put money into brains rather than stone and mortar.” And so after many years of supporting women’s academics, the university honored her with stone and mortar. Her famous building is considered the center of campus and houses our LGBTQ Center.
Salina is reading Jacobs’ current column about how tiring the marriage fight is when you’re 60 something.
“I think Fay needs to come here and put her feet up and let us do some of the heavy lifting now,” Rivera said. She is planning to host Jacobs for a reading of her short stories in the LGBTQ Center this fall. Time has moved on. Jacobs graduated and came out. Nixon’s long gone. “Tin soldiers” include LGBT citizens. Nixon once lamented that “you can’t appreciate the view from the mountaintop until you’ve been in the darkest valley.” For entirely different reasons, Jacobs can relate.
So, hosted by Rivera and her queer peers, Jacobs can prop her feet up on Matt’s desk in a center that didn’t exist in her day. Holding her wife’s hand, she will read aloud her AU/GayU retrospective: “The tear gas was scary. I hid in the bushes for the riot and in the closet by necessity. But there were these men in tights running hither and yon and somehow I knew this story would be funny one day.”
Jacobs’ dad would be proud of her finding a good story in this. Mary Graydon’s investment in the brain trust of AU’s women has paid off in both gray matter and stone and mortar. We will tell our own stories from an LGBTQ Center.
Real Estate
The rise of accidental landlords
How changing market conditions are impacting property management
Why are there more “accidental landlords” renting out their properties in the Washington, D.C., metro area?
The answer, according to The New York Times and other sources, is the current state of the real estate market. A growing number of accidental landlords are emerging as homeowners rethink their options in a challenging sales market. Rather than accept lower offers than they feel their properties deserve, many are choosing to rent instead of sell.
This shift reflects both financial caution and changing market dynamics, where holding onto an asset and generating rental income can seem more appealing than locking in a perceived loss.
A Market in Transition
The D.C. housing market remains fundamentally strong, but it has clearly shifted from the frenzied seller’s market of prior years. Inventory has increased significantly, and according to Redfin, active home listings in the Washington, D.C., metro area have increased significantly, with reports indicating a rise of roughly 33% to 50% year-over-year in late 2025 and early 2026.
This surge in inventory, coupled with falling demand, has shifted the market in favor of buyers, with roughly 22% more homes for sale than interested buyers. At the same time, homes are taking longer to sell. Buyers are still active, but they’re more selective, more price-sensitive, and less likely to engage in bidding wars.
This combination of rising inventory and longer selling timelines has created a key tension: sellers are no longer guaranteed the price they want. What’s a homeowner to do? Rent.
Why Homeowners Are Choosing to Rent
Rather than reduce their asking price, many homeowners are choosing to hold onto their properties and rent them out. National data confirms this shift. According to a report from Zillow, the share of rental listings made up of homes that failed to sell has climbed to near-record levels, with these accidental landlords accounting for a growing portion of rental supply. The number of these homeowners nationwide is at a three-year high.
The underlying psychology is simple: most sellers are not under immediate pressure to sell. And instead of accepting what they perceive as a discounted price, they opt to generate rental income and wait for more favorable market conditions.
For many homeowners, renting offers a way to “pause” the sales process without exiting the market entirely.
The Ripple Effect on the Rental Market
This influx of accidental landlords is reshaping the rental landscape. And this could be you!
- This trend is increasing rental supply. When unsold homes are converted into rentals, they add inventory to a market that has already seen new apartment deliveries and multifamily expansion. This is one reason rent growth has cooled in recent months, with national increases slowing to modest levels.
- Additionally, it is changing the type of available rental housing. Accidental landlords are more likely to offer single-family homes, townhouses, or condos; properties that differ from traditional apartment stock. Zillow notes that single-family homes make up the largest share of these rentals now.
For renters in D.C., this means more choices, particularly in neighborhoods where rental inventory was previously limited.
Operational Challenges for Accidental Landlords
While renting may seem like a straightforward fallback strategy, many accidental landlords quickly discover that property management is a complex, operationally intensive business. Some of the most common challenges include:
- Tenant screening and leasing compliance. D.C. has robust tenant protections and rent control regulations, particularly for older multifamily buildings. One wrong step can create legal complications home owners are not prepared for.
- Maintenance and repairs. Deferred maintenance can quickly erode profitability and tenant satisfaction. And tenants do have the power to cut into your monthly profit when certain livability standards are not met.
- Cash flow management. Not all rental income covers mortgage payments, especially for owners with higher interest rates.
- Regulatory compliance. Licensing, inspections, and rent stabilization rules can create administrative burdens.
In short, many homeowners underestimate the complexity involved in the transition from owner-occupant to landlord. What begins as a temporary strategy can evolve into a long-term operational commitment.
Property Management Firms Are Stepping In
As a result, property management companies across the D.C. metro area are seeing increased demand, particularly from first-time landlords. These owners often lack the infrastructure, systems, and expertise required to manage a rental property effectively. Professional management firms provide an array of solutions including marketing and leasing services, tenant screening and placement, rent collection and financial reporting, maintenance coordination, and compliance with D.C.’s evolving regulatory environment. For accidental landlords, outsourcing these functions can turn a reactive decision into a more structured investment strategy.
Green Renting: A Strategic Advantage in D.C.’s Rental Market
One often overlooked opportunity for accidental landlords—especially in Washington, D.C.—is the growing demand for “green renting.”
Energy efficiency is no longer just a lifestyle preference. For many renters, particularly in a high-cost city like D.C., it is a financial decision. Utility costs in the District can be significant, especially during peak summer and winter months. Properties that offer lower monthly energy expenses immediately stand out in a competitive rental market.
Installing solar panels, where feasible, can meaningfully reduce or even offset tenant electricity costs. For renters comparing similar properties, the difference between a standard utility bill and a reduced or stabilized energy cost can be a deciding factor. This is particularly true in D.C., where tenants are often highly-informed, environmentally-conscious, and sensitive to total monthly living expenses, not just base rent.
For landlords, the benefits extend beyond tenant appeal. Solar installations can help reduce vacancy, support longer lease terms, and create a premium perception that differentiates a property from competing listings. In some cases, landlords may also benefit from local incentives, tax credits, or increased property value tied to energy improvements.
In a market where many accidental landlords are competing on similar housing stock—single-family homes, condos, and townhouses—energy efficiency can become a key differentiator. It is not just about sustainability; it is about positioning a property to perform better financially.
A Local Market With Unique Dynamics
Washington, D.C., is a housing market shaped by federal employment, policy changes, and macroeconomic uncertainty. Recent developments, including fluctuations in the federal workforce and return-to-office mandates, have influenced both housing supply and demand. In some cases, these shifts have contributed to increased listings and more cautious buyer behavior. At the same time, D.C.’s high cost of entry continues to support rental demand. This dual dynamic creates ideal conditions for the rise of accidental landlords. Are you ready for this seismic shift?
Scott Bloom is owner and Senior Property Manager of Columbia Property Management.
Michael,
I’m 34, and after being on the dating scene for about 12 years, I’m coming to the conclusion that I don’t want to be in a relationship.
I don’t love hanging out with the same person over and over again. I don’t feel all gooey when I’ve been with someone for a while. I run out of things to say, and also, it just gets boring.
I like my space. I don’t like having to share the bathroom or have someone next to me all night, especially when they want to go to sleep holding me. I know that sounds like heaven to a lot of people but it just feels intrusive to me.
It’s a pain to have to compromise what I want to do. When I want to go someplace on vacation, or try a restaurant, or get up early to go to the gym, or sleep in, I don’t want to have to run that by someone else and get their OK. Life’s short. I want to do what I want to do.
I feel like we are constantly bombarded with the message to date and find a mate, but I don’t really see the point. I don’t think I’m an introvert—I have a lot of friends—but I also like to spend time by myself and not be accountable to anyone.
When I think about marriage, it seems like a very old-fashioned concept, developed for straight people who want to have children. Historically you needed one person to work and another one to stay home and raise the kids. And you needed to stay together to give your kids two parents and a stable home. I get that.
But if I’m not having kids, what’s the point? I don’t need a husband to have sex. I can and do hook up all the time. It’s so easy to find someone online. And I get to have a lot more variety when I’m single than when I’m dating. Even though my relationships are always open, when I am dating someone, I always hook up a lot less, because I have to worry about the boyfriend’s feelings being hurt if I hook up “too much.”
I know I sound unromantic and maybe selfish but this is how I see it.
My friends are all about having a boyfriend. They think I’m being ridiculous. Can I get another opinion?
Michael replies:
You make great points. Relationships do require us to give up some of our independence. They can feel stifling at times. And when the excitement of a new partner fades, things will at times feel “boring” in all sorts of ways, including sex. You can choose to avoid all of this by remaining single.
But relationships also give us tremendous overlapping opportunities to grow, including:
Being pushed to develop a clear sense of self: When we must constantly decide what we are willing to do or not do as part of a couple; and when our partner inevitably and frequently has interests, values, and priorities that conflict with ours, then we are challenged, over and over, to decide what is most important to us and how we want to live our lives.
Frequent opportunities to build resilience: All those old issues from our past that get us upset or riled up? We have to work through them so that we can stay (pretty) calm rather than losing our minds when our buttons are pressed.
Improving our ability to have hard conversations – and without rancor: Unless we’re able to disagree, speak up, or confront when it’s important to do so, we are going to twist ourselves into a pretzel striving to accommodate the other person. And being able to engage in tough talks in a loving way is necessary if we want to have a loving relationship.
Becoming a more generous person: You wrote that you like to have things your way. But part of life, whether or not we are partnered, involves being thoughtful, considerate, and willing to put someone else first at times. Great relationships require us to do all of these things regularly—and many of us find that contributing to the happiness of someone we care about can increase our own happiness.
Besides these ongoing challenges, relationships give us the experience of someone knowing us deeply, and knowing someone deeply. There can be great comfort in going through life with someone with whom we have this intimate connection, along with ongoing shared experiences of trust, support, comfort, and love. Long-term companionship is also an adventure: Can we keep the relationship vibrant and fun as we both keep changing over time?
If you choose to remain single: Many people play their friendships on the easy setting, keeping things pleasant, on-the-surface, and non-confrontational; and cutting people off when things aren’t going well. Hanging in there to deal with the rough stuff can lead to deeper, longer friendships, and plenty of personal growth.
I do have a question for you: I am curious what sort of relationships you saw growing up, and what your own relationship experiences have been.
Intimate relationships aren’t for everyone, and you get to decide what is right for you. But if your negative view of relationships is influenced by having witnessed or experienced intrusive or just plain awful relationships, maybe you want to do some work (therapy, for example) to heal from this stuff, rather than letting your past limit your future. A healthy relationship means being part of a couple while also remaining a vibrant individual, not being stifled, bored, and losing your independence.
(Michael Radkowsky, Psy.D. is a licensed psychologist who works with couples and individuals in D.C., Maryland, Virginia, and New York. He can be found online at michaelradkowsky.com. All identifying information has been changed for reasons of confidentiality. Have a question? Send it to [email protected].)
Autos
Wagons ho! High-class, head-turning haulers
Automakers still offer a few good traditional station wagons
As a teenager, one of the first cars I drove — and fell in love with — was our family’s hulking full-size wagon. It stretched over 19 feet in length and weighed a whopping 5,300 pounds. That’s three feet longer and 1,000 heavier than, say, a Ford Explorer today.
But this Leviathan felt safe and practical, especially when tootling around town with my crew or traveling solo cross-country. Of course, this hauler was also an eco-disaster.
Luckily, that’s not the case today. And even though the number of traditional station wagons keeps shrinking, automakers are still offering a few gems.
VOLVO V60 CROSS COUNTRY
$54,000
MPG: 23 city/31 highway
0 to 60 mph: 6.6 seconds
Cargo space: 51 cu. ft. (rear seats folded)
PROS: Elegant design. Composed handling. Top safety features.
CONS: So-so power. Modest rear legroom. Only two trim levels.
The 2026 Volvo V60 Cross Country doesn’t cry for attention — and that’s the point. This is the automotive equivalent of Kristen Stewart, a celebrity who’s confident in her own skin and sees no need to post about it.
Under the hood, there’s a four-cylinder turbo engine paired with a mild-hybrid system, producing 247 horsepower. You won’t outrun other drivers, but there is a sense of calm authority when accelerating. The standard all-wheel drive and 8.1 inches of ground clearance mean this wagon is ready for dirt roads, bad weather or a spontaneous weekend jaunt.
And inside? Scandinavian minimalism at its finest. Clean lines. Gorgeous materials. Google-based infotainment that mostly works — though occasionally the system could be a bit faster, at least for my taste. The ride is smooth, composed and quiet, even if acceleration feels more “measured sip” than “espresso shot.”
But here’s the twist: After more than a decade, this is the final Volvo wagon in the U.S. Its farewell tour ends in 2026. That alone gives it collector-car status.
MERCEDES-AMG E53 WAGON
$95,000
MPG: 21 city/25 highway
0 to 60 mph: 3.4 seconds
Cargo space: 64.6 cu. ft. (rear seats folded)
PROS: Supercar vibe. Hybrid versatility. Stunning interior.
CONS: Some fussy controls. Can feel heavy when cornering.
If the Volvo V60 Cross Country is subtle, the 2026 Mercedes-AMG E53 Wagon is a screamer. It’s like being at a Lil Nas X concert: flashy, high energy, and full of shock and awe.
This performance wagon — a plug-in hybrid, no less — pushes well over 500 horsepower (and in some configurations over 600 horsepower), launching from 0 to 60 mph as fast as a $300,000 Aston Martin supercar.
Yes, deep down, this is still a wagon. But you also can do a Costco run in something that could embarrass sports cars at a stoplight. That duality is delicious.
Inside, Mercedes leans all the way in. The high-tech Superscreen setup stretches across the dash. Ambient lighting glows like a curated art installation. The 4D surround-sound audio literally pulses through the seats. It’s immersive. Borderline excessive. And entirely the point.
Rear-axle steering helps mask the size of this car, but there’s no hiding the weight — it’s a big, powerful machine. Still, this hauler handles far better than physics suggests it should.
PORSCHE TAYCAN CROSS TURISMO
$121,000
Range: 265 miles
0 to 60 mph: 2.8 seconds
Cargo space: 41 cu. ft. (rear seats folded)
PROS: Lightning fast. Space-age design. EV smoothness.
CONS: Very pricey. Options add up quickly. Limited rear visibility.
The Porsche Taycan Cross Turismo completely rewrites the wagon formula. Fully electric. Shockingly fast. Designed like it belongs in the Louvre.
Performance is instant. Depending on trim level, you’re looking at 0-to-60 mph in less than 3 seconds. No exuberant engine noise — just that smooth, purring EV surge.
Handling? Pure Porsche. Low center of gravity thanks to the battery-pack placement. Precision that makes winding roads feel like choreography. And then — hello — there’s also a Gravel Mode for light off-road use.
Inside, the style is restrained but high-tech. Digital displays dominate, including a 10.3-inch passenger side touchscreen. Yet the layout feels intentional rather than overwhelming. Build quality is exceptional. Options, including leather-free materials and an active-leveling system for hard cornering, are endless — and expensive.
Range varies by model. But as with any EV, your lifestyle (and charging access) matters.
Overall, this is a wagon that looks and behaves like one helluva class act.
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