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Colton Haynes shares diary entries on mental health struggle

the actor’s progress is documented in journal

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(Screenshot courtesy of YouTube)

(Screenshot courtesy of YouTube)

Actor Colton Haynes is opening up about his mental health struggles while closeted by sharing personal diary entries for Paper magazine.

“Now Iā€™m so closed off to the world that I canā€™t even get up enough courage to go in public. Iā€™m afraid of people and have become agoraphobic. When I do leave the house itā€™s for work, the liquor store, or to grab coffee and an occasional sandwich from the store to suppress the hunger,” reads Haynes’s November 2014 entry. “I used to wake up and look forward to working out and working on my physical appearance to build up the idea of what people think I am. I am not my cover. I am so full of emotion and love and I wish I was able to express that again.”

“To the public eye, my possibilities are endless but in my mindā€¦Iā€™m fading away and battling to hide the pain and emotion that has plagued me my entire life. ā€¦ I got myself into this mess and even though I am losing the battle right nowā€¦I wonā€™t in the long run. Mark my words,” Haynes continues.

Two years later, after coming out to the public and treating his anxiety, Haynes wrote another diary entry that shows his progress.

“Iā€™m finally in a position where I can say Iā€™m the happiest Iā€™ve ever been. Iā€™ve accomplished so much with so little and my smile is finally not forced. Iā€™ve taken control of my own life for the first time and wonā€™t ever let anyone silence me or my passions ever again. Iā€™m finally free,” Haynes writes. “Donā€™t be afraid to seek help. There are so many people out there who put their jobs first and their mental health lastā€¦and trust meā€¦it will creep up on you. There are so many amazing people out there who can help with anxiety and other mental health issuesā€¦please donā€™t be afraid and know that it gets better.”

Read more about Haynes’s mental health journey here.Ā 

 

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John Waters released from hospital after car accident

Crash took place in Baltimore County

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John Waters (Washington Blade photo by Michael Key)

BY TAJI BURRIS | Baltimore filmmaker John Waters was released from the hospital Tuesday morning following a car accident.

The 78-year-old released a statement saying that although he was hurt in the Baltimore County crash, he did not sustain major injuries.

The rest of this article can be found on the Baltimore Banner’s website.

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Arts & Entertainment

Washington Bladeā€™s Pride on the Pier and fireworks show returning June 8

The annual Pride on the Pier Fireworks Show presented by the Leonard-Litz Foundation will take place on Saturday, June 8 at 9 p.m.

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Pride on the Pier (Photo Courtesy The Wharf)

The Washington Blade, in partnership with LURe DC and The Wharf, is excited to announce the 5th annual Pride on the Pier and fireworks show during D.C. Pride weekend on Saturday, June 8, 2024, from 2-10 p.m.

The event will include the annual Pride on the Pier Fireworks Show presented by the Leonard-Litz Foundation at 9 p.m. 

Pride on the Pier (Photo Courtesy The Wharf)

Pride on the Pier extends the cityā€™s annual celebration of LGBTQ visibility to the bustling Southwest waterfront with an exciting array of activities and entertainment for all ages. The District Pier will offer DJs, dancing, drag, and other entertainment. Alcoholic beverages will be available for purchase for those 21 and older. Local DJā€™s Heat, Eletrox and Honey will perform throughout the event.

3 p.m. – Capital Pride Parade on the Big Screen

3:30 p.m. – Drag Show hosted by Cake Pop!

9 p.m. – Fireworks Show Presented by Leonard-Litz Foundation

Pride on the Pier (Photo Courtesy of The Wharf)

The event is free and open to the public. The Dockmasters Building will be home to a VIP experience. To learn more and to purchase tickets go to www.prideonthepier.com/vip. VIP tickets are limited.

Event sponsors include Absolut, Buying Time, Capital Pride, DC Brau, DC Fray, Burney Wealth Management,Ā Infinate Legacy, Leonard-Litz Foundation,Ā Mayor’s Office of LGBTQ Affairs, MISTR, NBC4, The Wharf. More information regarding activities will be released at www.PrideOnThePier.com

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ā€˜RuPaulā€™s Drag Race: All Starsā€™ cast visits D.C.

8 queens vie for $200,000 prize for charity in new season, premiering May 17

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The cast of the latest ā€˜RuPaulā€™s Drag Race All Starsā€™ season sashayed on the National Mall to promote the reality show's ninth season on Monday. (Photo by Tasos Katopodis/Getty Images for MTV; used with permission)

Donning sparkling and star-studded red, white, and blue attire on a gloomy, humid D.C. Monday, the cast of the latest ā€œRuPaulā€™s Drag Race All Starsā€ season sashayed on the National Mall to promote the reality show’s ninth season.  

This upcoming season is different than those in the past ā€” eight queens are competing for a donation of $200,000 for the charity of their choosing, rather than a personal cash prize. 

Several cast members noted how it felt important to visit the nationā€™s capital, being authentically themselves and wearing drag. Nina West, who competed in season 11, likened drag to armor. 

ā€œWeā€™re here during a really specific time in history, that’s, I would say, markedly dark,ā€ she told the Blade at the steps of the Lincoln Memorial. ā€œAnd there’s an opportunity, as drag has always done, which is for our community as specifically LGBTQI+ people, to stand in our truth and be wonderful ā€” like guardians and fighters for our community.ā€ 

Sheā€™s competing for the Trevor Project, which is focused on suicide prevention and crisis intervention for young LGBTQ people. This seasonā€™s pivot to compete for charity made Nina West want to come back on the show for the All Stars season. Sheā€™s been offered the spot two times before this, she said, and this twist aligned with what she wanted to do. 

Several of the other queens mentioned that itā€™s an honor to be featured in this season, including season 5ā€™s Roxxxy Andrews. She also competed in two subsequent All-Stars seasons. 

She chose the organization Miracle of Love, which provides HIV/AIDS prevention programming and assistance in central Florida. Itā€™s a smaller, more local organization, which is why Roxxxy Andrews chose it. She wants to make its work more nationally known. Also, vying to win during a charity season makes the competition feel more rewarding, she said. 

Plastique Tiara of season 11 also noted itā€™s different competing for charity. Sheā€™s competing for the Asian American Foundation, which launched in 2021 in response to the rise in anti-Asian hate and aims to curb discrimination and violence through education and investments in nonprofits. 

ā€œIt’s more competitive because then you’re fighting not just only for yourself, but your ideas and the things that you love,ā€ she said. 

Vanessa Vanjie of seasons 10 and 11 agreed that competing for charity adds a bit more pressure ā€” she chose the ASPCA. And as onlookers near the Lincoln Memorial took pictures of and with the queens, she said she was relieved.Ā 

ā€œI was a little bit worried somebody would yell some slurs at us,ā€ Vanessa Vanjie said. ā€œNothing happened. Everybody came to take pictures like Santa Claus in the middle of the mall.ā€

Thereā€™s a range of contestants from different seasons for this round of All Stars. Some queens hail from recent seasons, but Shannel competed on the showā€™s first season. To be a part of this new season is surreal, she said. 

Sheā€™s competing for the Anxiety and Depression Association of America, which she has a close tie to. Sheā€™s dealt with anxiety her entire life. The association is focused on increasing awareness and improving diagnosis and treatment. 

ā€œI always felt like I just wasn’t normal, sadly,ā€ she said. ā€œAnd so now being able to be able to do this season and to get back to that organization is like amazing to me.ā€

Gottmik, from season 13, is competing for Trans Lifeline ā€” a nonprofit providing advocacy, a hotline and grants created by trans people, for trans people. Being able to do drag and give back is the ā€œperfect scenario,ā€ Gottmik said. 

Gottmik was the first openly trans man on Drag Race, which was overwhelming when first on the show. Gottmik felt pressure to be the ā€œperfect example,ā€ but later realized that they didnā€™t have to worry so much. 

ā€œI just want to show people that trans people are real people. We can express ourselves however we want to express ourselves, through drag, through whatever it may be,ā€ Gottmik said. 

The new season will be available to stream on Paramount+ on May 17.Ā 

The cast of RuPaul’s Drag Race pose with White House Press Secretary Karine Jean-Pierre at The Little Gay Pub on Monday. (Photo by Tasos Katopodis/Getty Images for MTV; used with permission)
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