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A poignant tribute to Daniel Espejel

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Daniel Espejel, gay news, Washington Blade
Daniel Espejel (Photo courtesy Tony Purcell)

This is a little unusual for this column but something worth sharing. Last week, I attended a “Celebration of Life” for Daniel Espejel a young man who left us much too early. I was honored to know him and his husband Tony Purcell. They had been together for 16 years. Daniel was a brilliantly creative young man with a smile that never stopped. But as I sat at the celebration what moved me and brought most of us to tears was the eulogy written and delivered by Tony’s dad. I thought of Pride and of Stonewall and of how wonderful it would be if every gay boy had a family like Tony’s. If every member of the LGBTQ community could be embraced by family like Daniel was. I share this eulogy from Daniel’s father-in-law and hope you will also be moved by it.

Eulogy by Anthony J. Purcell, Sr.

We come together this evening to celebrate the life of Daniel Espejel. He would have approved of us holding this celebration in this very appropriate venue, the Women’s National Democratic Club because Daniel’s clientele were mostly women. Everything he did in his flower and cosmetic businesses involved creating beauty and delighting his clientele with his artistic works.

It is said that, “Anyone can put paint on a canvas, but only a true master can bring the painting to life.” Daniel was a true master; he expressed himself using various mediums but was renowned for his floral arrangements. When Daniel entered a building, his beautiful smile and joyous disposition brought energy, love, and life to everyone. His generosity to all was never ending. He was a perfect ambassador for the community to have front and center to soften the hearts and minds of those conservatives who stereotype the community for their beliefs and actions, instead of who they are individually.

Daniel’s business adventure had him hobnobbing with the rich and famous and his resume reads like a “Who’s Who.” His floral arrangements sat at the tables of two Popes, presidents, vice presidents, ambassadors, royalty, heads of state, and many of the society women of Washington, D.C. He touched them all and because of it, they loved him.

Daniel lived the American Dream. He came to the United States at the age of 18 at attend American University. He left behind his parents and 3 siblings in Mexico to achieve his dream and start a new life. A life he would never have an opportunity to have had he stayed in Mexico.  All families in America have immigration as their roots because the only real Americans are the American Indians, therefore; we were proud to have Daniel become part of our family. Daniel was able to have an exceptional life in America because of his hard work ethic. He built a successful flower business and he continued to branch out into other business interests.

When we would go out to eat at a restaurant as a family, you could count on Daniel always want to sample some of your meal and to his credit, he would always offer you some of what he had ordered. He loved trying different dishes and cuisines. He leaves me with the daunting task of decorating our two Christmas trees later this year. This was always his job at Thanksgiving and I am already hearing in my head “That is not the way Daniel did it!”… “Thanks a lot, Mister!” Daniel always thought of my wife and I as his American parents and he would come to me for fatherly advice on numerous issues. My wife always benefitted from Daniel’s expertise in fashion and fads. He spoiled her and buttered her up in ways which I could never match.

The music artist Sting, sang, “When you love somebody, when you love somebody, set them free, free set them free. Free, free, set them free.” We all loved Daniel and that is what we had to do. It is normal for the children to bury their parents, not the parents to be burying their son. We all wanted Daniel to stay with us on Earth, but we took the advice of the medical staff and “Set him free.”

There is no book to reference as a father when you do not have answers that are needed for your son, when he comes to you and asks, “Why?” All you can do is provide comfort, love, and support. Tell him the answers he seeks are not found here at this time and may never be found until the next journey on the road of life. Live one day at a time, then two, then a week, and then a month. Tomorrow will be that one month.

Finally, we want to thank everyone for joining us in celebrating Daniel’s Life this evening. I leave you with thought, maybe, just maybe, Daniel’s clientele has now risen to the very top. He now arranges flowers for God’s table.

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District of Columbia

Physician: addiction doesn’t always look the way you think it does

Yngvild Olsen headed HHS’s Center for Substance Abuse Treatment during Biden-Harris administration

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Dr. Yngvild Olsen (Photo courtesy of Olsen)

Many people think the telltale signs of drug addiction include sweating and vomiting. But a prominent addiction medicine physician says the best signals aren’t always so visible. 

Dr. Yngvild Olsen says more accurate signs come from the brain, specifically the compulsion to keep using drugs, including opioids, despite damage to education, career and relationships. 

While it may be harder to understand the true nature of drug addiction, it’s never been more important because of the increased fatality risk of even microscopic amounts of fentanyl, which can be found in many illegal drugs. 

Olsen, who headed the Center for Substance Abuse Treatment at the Department of Health and Human Services in the Biden-Harris administration, has worked in addiction treatment for more than two decades. She is now a healthcare advisor with the law and professional consulting firm Manatt, Phelps & Phillips and a physician at the Institute for Behavior Resources/Reach Health Services in Baltimore. 

Olsen met with Youthcast Media Group to discuss her career, the opioid epidemic and what to know about fentanyl. The physician, a graduate of Harvard Medical School and the John Hopkins Bloomberg School of Public Health, cited her field experiences as key in shaping her perspective on addiction treatment and recovery. This interview is edited for clarity and length. 

What made you believe this work in addiction treatment is important?

I had a couple of experiences really early on in my career that very significantly shaped my interest in addiction and addiction medicine, and my belief that I had a role, and that I could really help people get better from that disease. So the first was during the summer between my first and second year in medical school. I spent the summer on the Eagle Butte and Pine Ridge reservations in South Dakota and really saw firsthand just the devastating impact that substance use — in that case, alcohol — had on not only individuals, but their families and whole communities, and just how profound that impact had been for people who had lost their lives, who had lost family members, who had physically, emotionally and spiritually negative impacts of just feeling very hopeless and and trying to find solace in their substance use, particularly their alcohol use, and doing that without really finding it. I think that was really the lesson that experience taught me. 

What did you learn about treatment practices during your medical education? How was that helpful to your career?

When I was a resident in general primary care at Boston Medical Center, I was really fortunate to have a group of mentors who also were general internists, like I was training to be, who were very interested and focused on medical education and research in substance use. And so they modeled for me many of the interactions that we had with patients. I got to do a research study with one of them looking at smoking cessation among people with opiate use disorder, taking methadone. And really importantly, I got to spend a month with one of them at the Boston City Public Health Department’s Opioid Treatment Program, or what some people call a methadone clinic, because he was their medical director. I got to see people recover, and who had recovered, who had gotten their lives back together, gotten their families back together, had new families (or) businesses. It was unbelievably helpful to see that people could recover, that they did recover, and that I, as a physician, could be part of their treatment. I saw people get better, and recover, with medications like methadone and buprenorphine, and other services designed individually for them. That was really helpful and kind of a big eye-opening moment for me.

What factors contribute to addiction and why is it considered a complex disease?

People come into treatment for their addiction — or when they’re not in treatment, but are in an emergency department or on the street — with a lot of shame. They have a lot of shame about this disease that they have, that for so long, they were told, ‘Well, you know, you should just stop. Why can’t you just stop?’ Well, we know that addiction is a disease. It’s a complex disease that has lots of different factors related to it. So there’s a big genetic component that combines with environmental factors and other risk factors. For example, people have what’s called adverse childhood experiences. Some of these are if they grow up with lots of physical or sexual abuse or emotional abuse or have parents who are in jail. That’s really traumatic and so all those childhood experiences that increase stress are a big risk factor. 

What is the easiest opioid to get addicted to?

It used to be heroin. That was a big problem, particularly in the Northeast and other parts of the country. That shifted to prescription opioids, beginning around the year 2000. So for about 10 years, it was really prescription opioids that were a big problem — people misusing them. And then it switched back to heroin. And then in about 2015, fentanyl came on the scene, and that really changed the game, given just how unbelievably potent fentanyl is, so it doesn’t take a lot to cause an overdose. Now there are all those other synthetic opioids, like the orphines and nitazenes and all those combinations of other substances, but fentanyl is really what’s still kind of driving a really big part of the overdose crisis.

Do LGBTQ individuals face heightened challenges when battling addictions? How do addiction specialists like you account for those challenges?

We certainly know that the prevalence of overdose and the challenges of substances is higher in the LGBTQ+ community. Where I see patients, we did a big LGBTQ+ training and had a grant to specifically provide services to that population. Where we were located, in Baltimore City, there is a big transgender community not that far from us. Particularly in the LGBTQ+ population, they have multiple stigmas. So it just compounds multiple stressors. And stress is a risk factor for substance use, and particularly a risk factor for recurrence of a substance use disorder. And so when you have all these negative factors building up in people, that can make it that much more challenging for people to find the services that they find meaningful and that are welcoming and supportive of them. So we tried very hard — and we still do — to make sure that we are a welcoming and safe space, because I think it is that safety that is really paramount.

What advice would you give someone worried about a friend or family member’s substance use?

There are two things. One is: I would talk to that person about your concerns and how that person’s personality changes or their behavior changes when they’re using or in withdrawal, and how that might be impacting their health and how they’re feeling. And then second: you can let them know that there are actual treatments that are really helpful, that can make them feel better and that can help them get back to who they were before they started using. It’s important not to be accusatory because … [people] have a lot of shame already, and so when somebody starts accusing them, that shame just gets worse. And a lot of times, people who have a substance use disorder or are using opioids won’t necessarily agree that they have a problem when you first start to talk to them. But talk to them again every time something happens and say, ‘I’m really worried about you because this now has happened and I see it as being tied to your substance use.’ And let them know that there are people who can help and that they could actually feel a lot better.

This work is part of a partnership between the Washington Blade Foundation and Youthcast Media Group, funded in part through a FY26 Community Development Grant from the Office of D.C. Mayor Muriel Bowser. Adrian Malone is a senior at Bard High School Early College DC, one of Youthcast Media Group’s journalism class partners. Shreya Jyotishi, YMG assistant manager of content and programming, is a former Washington Blade intern and 2026 graduate of American University.

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District of Columbia

Bet Mishpachah participates in D.C. Oct. 7 commemoration ceremony

Wednesday marked three years since Hamas attacked Israel

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Bet Mishpachah Executive Director Joshua Maxey speaks at an Oct. 7 commemoration ceremony at Washington Hebrew Congregation in D.C. on Oct. 7, 2026. (Photo courtesy of Joshua Maxey)

Bet Mishpachah Executive Director Joshua Maxey on Wednesday was among those who spoke at a ceremony in D.C. that marked the third anniversary of the Oct. 7 attack in Israel.

The Jewish Federation of Greater Washington hosted the ceremony that took place at the Washington Hebrew Congregation in Northwest D.C. Bet Mishpachah is the city’s LGBTQ synagogue.

“It was a deeply moving evening, especially hearing the stories of people who knew those who were murdered and those who survived and experiencing music that gave a voice to grief and hope,” Maxey told the Washington Blade.

Hamas militants on Oct. 7, 2023, killed roughly 1,200 people, including upwards of 360 partygoers at the Nova Music Festival near Re’im, a kibbutz that is a couple miles from the Gaza Strip, when it launched its surprise attack on Israel. The militants also kidnapped more than 200 people.

The Hamas-controlled Gaza Health Ministry says Israeli forces have killed more than 74,000 people in the enclave since Oct. 7.

The International Criminal Court in 2024 issued arrest warrants for Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu; former Israeli Defense Minister Yoav Gallant; former Hamas leader Yahya Sinwar; Mohamed Diab Ibrahim al-Masri, the head of Hamas’s military wing known as the Qassam Brigades; and Ismail Haniyeh, chair of the Hamas Political Bureau, after it accused them of committing war crimes and crimes against humanity in Gaza and Israel.

The Israeli government has strongly denied it has committed genocide in Gaza.

An Israeli airstrike on a compound in Khan Younis, a city in southern Gaza, on July 13, 2024, killed killed Deif, one of the alleged Oct. 7 masterminds. Israel less than three weeks later assassinated Haniyah in Tehran, the Iranian capital. Israel Defense Forces soldiers on Oct. 16, 2024, killed Sinwar in Rafah, a city in southern Gaza.

Hamas last October released the remaining hostages in Gaza as part of a ceasefire agreement that President Donald Trump helped broker. Israel has continued to conduct airstrikes and other military operations in Gaza since the official suspension of hostilities took effect.

“For Bet Mishpachah, it was especially meaningful to lift up the names of LGBTQ+ people, those whose identities we know and those whose stories may never be fully known, who were murdered, and to honor the LGBTQ+ survivors whose resilience continues to inspire us,” said Maxey, referring to his participation in Wednesday’s ceremony. “Emily Damari’s story is particularly poignant: while held hostage, she had to hide the fact that she was gay because she feared that revealing her identity to her captors could put her life at even more risk. Yet, she survived.”

“Her story, like so many others, reminds us of the extraordinary courage it takes simply to remain human in the face of hatred,” he added. “May we continue to remember and to mourn, to honor, and to work toward a future rooted in peace and hope.”

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Virginia

Campaign urges Virginia High School League to reverse stance on trans athletes

Equality Arlington and other advocacy groups behind ‘Right 2 Play’ VA’ initiative

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(Inked Pixels via Bigstock photo)

Virginia advocacy groups have launched a campaign that urges the Virginia High School League to once again allow student athletes to compete on sports teams that correspond with their gender identity.

Equality Arlington on Sept. 16 published an article about the “Right 2 Play VA” campaign. Amy, a group representative, spoke about the initiative with the Washington Blade.

“The primary goal is to reverse the Virginia High School League’s discriminatory ban on allowing transgender girls to play on girls’ sports and replace it with a policy that is fair for all students.” they said.

The Virginia High School League in 2025 announced the policy, which reversed a previous position in support of transgender and nonbinary athletes. The 2025 policy coincided with President Donald Trump’s executive order — “Keeping Men Out of Women’s Sports” — that threatened to “rescind all funds from educational programs that deprive women and girls of fair athletic opportunities, which results in the endangerment, humiliation, and silencing of women and girls.”

The Arlington Gender Identity Alliance, Equality Virginia, and the American Civil Liberties Union of Virginia have also joined the “Right 2 Play VA” campaign.

“We had a policy in Virginia for 12 years that allowed transgender girls to play on girls’ sports teams, and we had not one instance — not one instance — that was brought forward demonstrating an unfair advantage or any type of safety concern,” said Amy. 

Amy then discussed what they described are the benefits of trans youth playing sports.

“There are physical benefits. There are mental health benefits. There are community and social development benefits, and those are all well documented,” they said. “All kids should have the right to benefit from playing youth sports. We are talking about kids. We are talking about youth. We are not talking about Olympians. We are not talking about Division One college athletes. We are talking about kids in Virginia, and because the benefits of sports are so well documented, we think that every kid should have the ability to play sports.”

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